As I Am
by emisummers
Summary: Nearly 2 years after Graduating WMHS in Lima Ohio, Santana Lopez meets Brittany Pierce on her way to an early morning class at University of Hawaii. A love story in which both of their pasts collide and they find themselves connected in more ways than one.
1. Route 57A

**AN: Follows most of canon Glee as if Brittany never went to WMHS. **

**Rated M for later Chapters. **

**I do not own glee or any of their characters.**

**Santana POV, January 2014**

* * *

Chapter One: Route 57A

"Does this pass by McDonalds downtown?"

The bus Driver stares blankly at me and I roll my eyes.

"I mean, McDonald's by _Macy's_ downtown?" I have to rephrase the question because, earth to Santana, there are like a shitload of McDonalds' in downtown. Ugh, I should have seriously rethought the idea of not buying a cup of coffee this morning. Why on earth did I tell myself that I didn't really need it? Of course I needed it, especially if its six in the morning.

"Oh um, yea. Is that where you're getting off?" The driver asks me, clearly not looking me in the eyes.

"Yea," I say with hinted anger in my voice. I flash him my rider's pass while quickly trying to make my way into the back of the bus. But I stop when I suddenly feel a thick grasp on my wrist. I whip my head back to find a greasy sweaty hand holding tightly around my wrist. I give the driver an irritated look as I glare right into his eyes wishing I had the power to make him explode.

"Let me see that pass one more time, sweetheart. It didn't look _real_." He says as a grin forms on the corner of his mouth. I roll my eyes and turn back towards him, holding out my pass that's safely attached to the lanyard around my neck. In what seems like forever I finally realize exactly what it is that he's staring at.

"Ahem!" I make a fake attempt to clear my throat to snap his leering eyes back to my face. He looks back at me with a surprised face but it quickly gets replaced with a smirk. Punching his throat is the first thing that comes to mind. But because I've learned to tame myself, I refrain from doing so.

"Oh right. Um, yep, seems okay to me." He nods away his daydreaming, "Definitely not real though..." He tries to hide that last part under his breath but yet I still manage to hear it over the rumbling engine of the bus.

"_Great_." I say in a slightly sarcastic way, rolling my eyes turning my attention back to finding a seat far away from this creep. I sigh when I realize I'm the only one on the bus. No shit Santana. Of course I'm the only one on the bus. I got on the very first stop and I was the only one that got in. "God, I really _did_ need that coffee." I say to myself while internally kicking myself in the ass.

I take my seat right behind the back door and immediately start rummaging through my school bag for my iPod. "Fuck!" I wince as the tip of a pen jabs in between my nail. Seriously, what's the point of having a pencil bag if I know I clearly am not using it? I nearly tear my bag open all the way when I try to get a clear view of where exactly my iPod is. I spot it hidden behind a couple of spare pads and a few stray receipts. I really need to clean my bag out.

I unravel my earphones from my iPod and jab them into my ear. Making my ears learn quickly just how irritated I actually was. I take a deep breath to calm myself so I don't cause myself any more harm.

"Aww come on sweetheart! Why don't you wanna talk to me?" I snap my head up to find those same leering eyes looking at me through a mirror. This guy is seriously trying to piss me off. "Come on sweetheart! Take those off… I wanna get to _know _you." Those eyes, again, not on my face. "Hey, maybe if I pull over for a bit I could really show those 'fake passes' how to pass inspection from your local bus driver." He chuckles through a sweaty smirk and it makes my blood boil. Is this guy really serious? Does he _want _to die? "Come on sweetie, I know you can hear me." I feel myself practically flying off my seat.

"Oh, I'm sorry were you trying to make conversation? I couldn't tell if you were talking to me or my _rambunctious_ _twins_. Maybe next time you should try wearing a big sticker on that sweaty, never-been-washed forehead of yours that reads 'WARNING: Lack of Brain'." It was over. I snapped. "Or maybe the next time you pick up some gross piece of ass on a late Saturday night you could pay her for some 'servicing' with what money you actually do have minus the alcohol and porn. I'm sure she can make ALL your gross STD filled fantasies come true. That way you don't have go into work on an early morning trying to hit on girls who are clearly" I motion to myself, "out of your league." I don't waste a second more with this asshole as I get up and exit through the back door just when the bus stops at its next location to pick up the waiting rider.

I glance to my side to see who was going to suffer next from the driver's clear lack of manners and I see blonde. The glow of her hair and the glow of an early sun lose to each other as they dance across her face. She looks at me and gives me a little smile before she takes a step into the bus. I'm filled with chills down my spine but try to shrug it off as a result from the weather.

"Wait!" I try to yell but it's too late. She disappears into the bus and the doors slam shut. I run towards the front of the bus to see her confused face looking back down at me. But right in that moment I look behind her to see those eyes. Those same leering eyes... looking directly at her ass. I want to do more then punch him now. I want to rip his throat out.

The noise of the bus starting to move away breaks me out of the intense stare I seem to be giving the driver. A smirk appears before his face and I know exactly what he's thinking. He speeds off right away and I'm left just standing there with my heart pounding. Why the hell did I get off? That girl seemed so fragile and so innocent. I couldn't stand the thought of the things he would be saying to her. I wish I didn't get off. I wish I could've stopped her from getting on.

What am I thinking? I barely know this girl and I'm being protective towards her. For all I know she was fully capable of protecting herself. Or maybe she _is _a late night Saturday girl? Probably not though. But she seemed like she could handle herself. I mean you kind of have to be able to if you're going to be out here all by yourself.

Wait, what? Was I just trying to justify the fact that I let her get on a bus, _alone_, with the most disgusting man I've ever met? I hope I get to see her again. I pray to God nothing happens to her. I would never forgive myself. Was it even my fault? I don't know. All I know now is that I'm definitely going to be late for class now. I guess that means no stopping at McDonald's for a cheap coffee. Great.

* * *

"Shit" I mutter to myself as I check my watch. It's nearly 7:45. I'm half an hour late. Who the hell's idea was it to make the buses only run every thirty minutes on mornings? I'm nearly running towards the auditorium at this point. What a great way to start the semester Santana, good job. But hey, at least the professor won't forget the memorable half an hour late entrance I will be gracing her with in about a minute.

I stop in front of the door with my hand on the doorknob. Should I even go in now? It's only the first day and people transfer in late all the time. The first day can't be that important can it? If I don't go in I'll be saving myself from all the embarrassment at least. _No._ I have to go in. I need to. I promised myself no more fuck ups this semester, no matter what happens. Late or not, I will be trying my hardest. I grip the doorknob and turn it to the right.

The door swings open with ease and I make my way over the threshold. Immediately I get greeted by darkness except for the light coming from the front of room. _Shit_. I walked in during a video. All eyes are clearly on me as my classmates look towards the intruding light at the back of the room. I freeze. Memorable entrance? Check.

I get snapped back to reality when the loud thud of the door closing echoes throughout. _Note to self: Doors slam_. I look up to see my professor glaring at me. I quickly avert my eyes to find the nearest empty seat and see one that's pretty close and easy to get to. My eyes go straight to the ground as I make my way to the row with the empty seat as fast as I could. When I reach my destination I only have to shimmy past three people to get to my seat. I sit down finally and look up in hopes that everyone has already forgot about my dramatic entrance and reverted their eyes back to the screen. Thankfully they have. I feel relief as I sit back.

* * *

Ten minutes into the video I can feel eyes on me. I don't know why but I just feel them, burning their way into the back of my head. I try to glance behind me without being too obvious as to what I'm doing, or even looking for. I don't know who it is but it's really starting to make me feel uncomfortable. I begin to squirm in my chair. Then I feel a little tap on my shoulder. I twist my torso around until finally...

Deep brown meets deep blue.

"Hey," she whispers to me, "do I know you?" It's her. It's the girl that got on the bus. The girl I tried to save but then failed miserably. She's in my class. She's sitting right behind me. She looks better up close. Her blonde bangs curling right by her cheekbone. I have a slight urge to lift my hand and brush it behind her ear.

"Helloooo?" she whispers again, waving her hand a little bit in front of my eyes. I realize I've been staring and blinked a couple of times to release my gaze on her. I shake my head and answer her.

"N-no. I don't believe we know each other." I state in a matter of fact kind of tone, trying to hide the nervousness in my voice and I turn back around to face the front. This is a first. Why am I acting like this?

* * *

The lights flicker on as class is dismissed. Everyone else begins to get up and stretch or pack their bags while I stay seated to wait till the crowd of classmates die down. I've always hated trying to squeeze through a door when really you just have to wait for a minute or two and you can just walk right through it. I get up to pack my bag when a voice stabs through my thoughts.

"You like to wait too, huh?" The sweet voice says to me. I look up and I instantly get hit in the face with those eyes again. I could get lost in those for days, years. Lifetimes even. "By the way," She grins at me, "I've figured out where I've seen you before."

I cock my head to the side, trying to play it off as if I've completely forgotten her already. Although clearly that's a harder said than done. It's impossible to forget her. To forget those eyes, that hair, that smile, god that smile. It should be illegal to forget those things.

"Glee Club Nationals in Chicago." She states with a bounce on her toes. I'm not gonna lie I was seriously surprised when she said that. How did she know I was in glee club? How could she know when we were so far away from Lima? "You're club took first place. It was awesome. I was there. You guys definitely deserved it," she finishes explaining with a huge smile on her face.

"Oh. Yea." I was frozen. What was I supposed to say to that? I was taken completely off guard. No one's even said the words 'glee club' to me in the past two years. I think she could sense my uneasiness because she took a stuttered step back and made her face fall into a half smile half frown type thing that I'm sure only she could pull off. "No I mean, yea I was in glee club. Sorry, I just got caught off guard. I haven't even thought about glee club for a while now so I was a bit surprised." Lie. I thought about all my friends from glee club practically every day.

"Liar. I bet you think about it all the time." She jokes with her smile growing big again.

I freeze again. What just happened? Did she just see through my lie? She couldn't have. I've spent my whole life building the perfect way to get away with a lie. I own lying. Lying is my bitch. No, she was clearly joking. She didn't see through anything. I stiffen again. "Ha, why would I? Seriously I don't even remember what songs we sang. It was just a competition really." I say with a shrug. There, that was good enough.

"You really should stop lying so much, it makes you look sad." She says with a frown while turning to her desk to finish packing the rest of her books and I'm left to stare at her back. Is this really happening to me right now? I don't even know this girl's name and she's reading me like an open book. How is she even capable of doing this?

"Do you want to maybe go get some coffee with me?" I nearly blurt out before my brain tells me to stop. I suck my lower lip into my mouth to bite as I realize just how forward that actually came out. She turns to look at me, her eyes smiling.

"Sure! I just gotta return some of these books and I'll meet you in the cafeteria? Seriously I don't know why I brought all my books. I could've just brought the ones I'm returning. I brought my book for this class for nothing. All we did was watch a boring movie," she frowns and tries to steady her books in her hands.

"Here, I'll help you." I say as I reach for the top two books in her hands. "It looks like you're gonna topple over with just a little push." I nudge her with my elbow causing the blonde to giggle. I think I even see a bit of a blush but I could be wrong. I really do need that coffee.

* * *

As we walk to the cafeteria together we make small talk about when our next class is and how many credits we're both taking. We go over the usual small talk subjects like what we do for fun and what we're studying.

"Nursing. Or maybe Photography. Or something else. Who knows?" she laughs with an unsure smile planted on her face. "What about you?"

"Law." I say with a sure tone in my voice. She looks sideways at me while still walking and gives me a smile that I only see through the side of my eye.

"You seem pretty sure of yourself."

"Yea well, I know what I want." I nod, "And when I want it I go for it." I shrug while giggling at myself because I hide a double meaning behind it.

"Is that why you asked me to coffee?" She questions and I snap my eyes to her face to catch her grin. How does she always do that? This girl makes me forget who I am. I'm Santana Lopez for Christ sake. No one gets past these walls. It's like she has the ability to find the smallest crack in them and bulldoze right through me. Maybe that's a good thing though. I've been living the past two years of my life alone behind these walls. Maybe it's time to finally let someone in.

_Hey big spender! Spend a little time with me!_

I just know my face is flushed with a deep red as I realized my phone is way too loud. Thank you Sugar Motta for your impeccable timing skills. I fumble for my phone in my pocket as I give... (Wait, what was her name?) I don't know, an apologetic smile. She just nods and smiles back.

"Hey Mami!" I answer, "How's your first day going?"

_"Oh my God it's so much fun! Just checking in on you, hun. How's your first day?" _I look up at the girl walking next to me and smile.

"It's great actually." I catch the way the side of her lips quirk up and my chest explodes, "Listen Mami, I gotta go. I'll fill you in when I get home okay?"

_"Ooo sounds interesting! Okay well I'll see you at home. I might be a little late though."_

"Okay sounds good. Love you Mami." I lock my phone and shove it back into my pocket. "Sorry about that." I turn to the girl beside me, "That was just my roommate. By the way, I'm Santana. I feel like since we're getting coffee together, you should probably know my name." I reach my hand out to shake.

"No problem at all, _Santana_." She giggles while reaching her hand out and smiling, "I'm Brittany."

The moment our hands touch my legs turn to jelly. I feel like I'm going to collapse and float away at the same time. Her hands are soft but her grip is strong, keeping me grounded. I move my gaze down to our hands and bask in the view of our hands together. They fit perfectly. I let go awkwardly as I realize I've been holding her hand for too long.

"So… should we go get that coffee now?" I ask as I spin on my heels towards the cafeteria. When we reach the door I quickly step forward and open it for her. Purely out of courtesy of course. She bows her head as she steps through the door and blushes as she mutters a small thank you. I nod back and follow closely behind her. She suddenly stops and her back meets my front in a very messy collision. I get startled as my head gets submerged by her hair. Her hair smells like fucking _perfection_. I almost lean into the smell but because of the momentum of me walking forward I end up flying my arms around her and I nearly topple both of us over.

Smooth.

"Shit!" Brittany holds her hand over her mouth, "I'm so sorry! I was trying to dodge that guy! He ran right past me. I'm so, so sorry." She starts fumbling as we both try to regain our balance. "I should have been paying attention, I'm sorry" She says looking at the ground and I chuckle at her adorableness. It wasn't even a big deal. Why is she so shaken up?

"It's okay, Brittany." I bring her hand back down, "Really, it's fine." I say as I grab her shoulders to prompt her to look at me. When she does I give her a big smile. In the corner of my eye I see the guy that made her stop so suddenly and I turn to face him.

"HEY!" I yell at him and he almost falls over at the sudden noise, "Watch where you're going next time, kid!" I tell him with my eyebrow cocked upwards. "Now say sorry a'fores I ends you." Giving him my signature scowl. He looks scared as he apologizes quickly and walks away.

"You didn't have to do that." Brittany frowns, "It was my fault. I wasn't really paying attention."

"Doesn't matter." I shrug like it's no big deal, "He shouldn't be running around in the first place."

"Well, thank you." She says with a smile. "Coffee now?" She asks me and I give her a nod. She claps her hands together and does a small jump on her toes. "Yay! I definitely need some in my system before I die. I feel like I'm only running on coffee at this point. Like what if I replaced all the blood in my body with coffee by now? That would be so cool." She continues to mutter to herself as she walks towards the coffee machine. I just stand there like an idiot, watching her be absolutely adorable without a care in the world.

This girl will be the death of me.

* * *

After about forty-five minutes and two cups of coffee later, Brittany's phone pierces through our conversation. "I'm so sorry, I have to take this." She says with a frown.

"No don't worry about, go ahead." I tell her. In all honesty I didn't want her to answer. Our coffee date was going so well, even if it wasn't really considered a 'date'. I was just starting to get to know her more. But I guess I should let it go seeing as I did answer my own phone earlier. She slides her thumb across the screen to answer.

"Hey mama, is everything ok?" She pauses and I watch as she listens to the person on the phone,"Oh no it's ok." She looks up at me and smiles, "I should be fine for now. And most of the stuff in there is for you anyway. I know how much you love your snacks." She giggles again and I try not to melt. "Bye-bye." She chirps into the phone before she puts it away in her bag and looks at me across the table.

I give her a shy smile. How does she make me feel this nervous? I don't know what to talk to her about now. I feel like a teenager on a first date. It's like I'm fumbling with thoughts in my mind while trying to still act super cool and worth my date's time. This coffee isn't helping either. If anything it made me more aware of how incredibly nervous she makes me. She breaks the silence first.

"So my friends and I get together every Sunday for a study session. Do you maybe wanna join us? I'm sure they wouldn't mind." I hear a bit of uneasiness in her voice. Maybe she was just as nervous as I was. "If you want to." She quickly continues, "And if you don't have any plans of course. I mean I know I barely know you but you've been really nice to me and I don't think seeing you in class twice a week would be enough for me." Her eyes grow big as she realizes what she just said. "I-I mean, I like you." Her eyes shoot up to mine and she shakes her head quickly. "_I mean_, I want to be your friend," she concludes and I let out a chuckle. Yep, she definitely just as nervous as I was. Nervousness looks good on her.

"I would love to, Brittany." I smile. "Just let me know when and where." I reach out and grab her hand. I pull out my pen from my bag next to me and click it. She giggles and moves her body around awkwardly as I write my number on her palm. "I'll definitely be there." I smile widely at her and when I'm done I get up as I grab my bag. "I have class now though but I'll be seeing you on Wednesday right? In class?" She looks at her hand with a warm smile before looking back up at me. She pushes her chair back and stands to her feet taking a step towards me.

"Yea… in class... or I'll just see you on the bus? Route 57A right?" She gives me a wink before turning and walking away.

My eyes grow big in shock. She _did_ remember me from this morning. My heart is pounding and I feel like I'm going to fall. Just as i thought I had a everything together enough to flirt properly she puts me in my place again. I reach forward to grab the back the chair in front of me to hold myself up. I keep my gaze on her back until she's no longer in my line of sight.

_Brittany_. She will _definitely_ be the death of me.

* * *

**AN: This chapter in no way reflects the bus drivers of Hawaii. If this were more accurate, it would most likely be a pervy passenger that would make you feel uncomfortable and the bus driver would kick the shit out of him. **

**I have no idea why I wrote the bus driver like this. But I promise I have nothing against Hawaii bus drivers. They are some of the nicest people you will ever meet. Promise.**


	2. Dancing In the Dark

**OKAY! Here's chapter 2! Let me know what you think so far! Also thanks to everyone who Favorited, Followed and reviewed! It made me all giddy on the inside :)**

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Chapter 2: Dancing In the Dark

Santana POV

As I'm waiting at the bus stop I can't help but feel the butterflies in my stomach. _Brittany_. I'll get to see her today. Why does this girl have this much of an effect on me? It almost feels good but yet super uncomfortable at the same time. I can't help but think about her sometimes. All day yesterday I kept zoning out at work and I swear I could just see the smoke coming out of my boss' ears. It wasn't my fault I couldn't focus.

_"Santana!" Someone calls my name from across the room. I nearly jump to my feet ready to attack whoever is yelling at me but then quickly realize it was Rick and that I'm at work, in my fucking cubical, day dreaming._

_"Yea...?" I have no idea why he sounds so mad. What the fuck did I do now?_

_"Yea?" I hear the mocking tone in his voice. "I was just in my office listening in on my little worker bees to make sure everyone is doing their part here." He cocks his head to the side like he just said something of importance to me. I just stare back. Clearly I had done something wrong. _

"_Okay... and?"_

_"And!? You wanna know what I heard when I listened in on you!?" he crosses his arms over his chest. Fuck if I know._

_"Nothing?" I blink a few times. I still don't know what I did wrong. "I don't know Rick, I wasn't even on the phone just now. I wasn't even talking to anyone."_

_"Are you kidding me Santana!? You had a customer on the phone! How did you not know you had someone on the phone? She was asking you all these questions! I listen in and all I hear is nothing! How are we supposed to sell memberships if my workers aren't even talking?"_

_Wait, what? I had a customer? What the hell? How did I miss that? And why the hell is Rick getting so god damn mad at me for? I'm like head bitch in charge. I make more sales than anyone here. Whatever, I need to focus. No more Brittany thoughts. Last thing I need is for Rick to get it in his head that I'm no longer needed. This job is easy as hell since I'm basically like the most convincing person on planet earth. I could probably even get some loser who doesn't even fucking like golf to buy fifteen memberships without even trying._

I get kicked out of my thoughts when I see the bus come around the corner. I remember my experience on Monday morning and I sigh at the thought of having to deal with this asshole again.

As the doors open I feel a flood of relief because not only is it a different bus driver, it's a woman and she seems genuinely nice. She smiles at me as I walk up the steps and flash her my pass. She nods and waits for me to sit down in the back before driving off.

I immediately start my search for my IPod, but this time I don't just aimlessly shove my hand into my bag. Finally I find it and put the earbuds in my ear. Without thinking I go straight to the first song in my playlist "WAKE UP BITCH" and press play.

_Hey Hey Hey_

_You and me keep on dancing in the dark_

_It's been tearing me apart_

_Never knowing what we are_

There I go thinking about Glee Club again. Which only makes me think of Brittany and how she can pretty much see right through me like she was practically born to do it. I really do miss everyone from Glee Club though. After I got over the fact that "man hands" Berry and frankenteen Finn ruined our shot at winning Nationals my junior year I came around to the idea of letting Artie and his nerd friends help us record our original songs so we could always remember how much fun we had in New York. We ended up doing some of our favorite songs that we did together too because they came out really good. I wonder if anyone still listens to them. Not that I would tell them I listen to them almost every day or anything. If anyone asks I would never admit to it. I close my eyes and lean my head on the window while I dance with my feet, still remembering the steps to our performance.

Suddenly I feel someone's presence next to me and I become stiff with irritation. Why would anyone think it was okay to sit _right next_ to me? The bus is nearly empty at this time of the day. I roll my eyes as I open them and turn to my left to glare at my victim. My face quickly changes from irritation to relief. _Brittany_. She reaches towards my ear and pulls out one of my earbuds, puts it in her right ear and smiles at me. She mouths a small 'Good morning' to me and then rests her head on my left shoulder.

I didn't know what was happening and my mind was stuttering behind the movements in front of me. When it finally caught up with each other I let go of a breath I didn't realize I was holding. This close contact should feel weird and awkward for me because we've only just met two days ago but it doesn't. It feels almost normal, like this was just something we do every day.

_Lay it all down_

_Got something to say_

_Lay it all down_

_Throw your doubt away_

_Do or die now_

_Step onto the plate_

_Blow the door wide open like up up and away_

I look at her lap and she's fiddling with her hands and tapping her feet to my music now. She lifts her head and takes the earbud out of her ear as she turns to look at me.

"What is this? It's really good." Throwing me a cute tired smile.

"Oh, it's actually an original song... from when I was in Glee Club..." I look away because I can feel my face turning hot. "I only found it on my computer the other day. I only thought of it because you brought it up." I chance a look at her to see if she believed me. She's just staring at me with one of those _uh huh, riiiiiight _looks. I just shrug and lean back into the window. As I do she leans into my side.

I look to my side and a part of me wants to lift my arm up and reach it around her shoulder to hold her closer. I manage to push that urge down.

Just as I'm feeling comfortable with this awkward cuddled position, she shifts in her seat and links her arm with mine while pulling it close to her warm body. I instantly feel my heart beating faster. I strain my body to look at her face without moving too much and see that she has fallen asleep. How can any one person be so damn adorable? I relax back into my seat and soon my heartbeat slows. She feels good against my body. Like we fit together.

* * *

I get jerked from my sleep as the bus comes to a stop and someone's bag hits the back of my head. I turn around and give the guy who just stood up a glare. He mouths a 'sorry' and continues to make his way to the door following the crowd of students. That's when I realized just how packed the bus became while we were sleeping. I turn my head and find Brittany in the same position I last saw her in. Maybe even a little more relaxed into me now.

I nudge her softly as I try to wake her up. She mumbles something and nudges her head back down into my shoulder. I laugh at how cute she's being. "Brittany" I whisper, no answer. "Britt, wake up. We're here." She lifts her head and her eyes are squinting at me now. "Hey. We fell asleep on the way. Come on, we have class in 15." She finally sits up and stretches her arms above her head revealing a bit of her toned stomach. My breath hitches in my throat. I swallow it down.

"Coffee..." leaves her mouth as she rubs her eyes. I tilt my head to the side with a smile and when she looks at me I nod.

* * *

We walk into class, coffees in hand, and make our way to two empty seats closer to the back and a little bit hidden. I don't mind though because this is a lecture class and I usually sleep through these things anyways.

Our professor walks in and almost immediately begins her lecture. I roll my eyes and a small groan leaves my mouth. I hear Brittany giggle next to me as she kicks me in the leg. I look back towards her and mouth the words 'good night'. She giggles and kicks me again and mouths back 'stop it, don't be mean.' I just shrug and take out my notebook as the rest of the class does the same.

A little while into the lecture I notice a couple of my classmates have already put their heads down to sleep. I look to my side at Brittany whose face is so concentrated it's almost too cute. Her pencil is in between her teeth and her eyebrows are knitted together. She's squinting her eyes at the board in front of us and every so often she'll look down at her notebook and jot down a few more things.

I get lost in my thoughts looking at her and I feel myself smiling. I don't even care that I'm staring at this point. I let my eyes finally wander over her body and I take in just how breathtaking this girl really is. Every part of her body is just screaming perfection to me. I catch her legs in my gaze and I can't help but wonder if they ever end.

I feel vibration in my pocket and I get jumped from my thoughts. I reach into my pocket and pull my phone out and slide my finger across the screen to unlock it.

_[UNKNOWN] You're staring... its cute._

… What? As I'm typing my response to ask who this is I hear Brittany giggling. I look up at her and she waves her phone in front of her telling me that it was her texting me. I instantly feel my face grow hot. If there was any way I could be any more embarrassed it might as well just happen now because I'm just going down. I break our gaze and turn back to the front. I need to play this off without making me even more embarrassed. I save her number in my contacts before I text back.

_[S:] I was not STARING. I was just looking at your outfit._

_[B:] Don't you mean 'STARING at my outfit' ;P_

_[S:] … Shut up... stop texting me. You should be listening. Don't come to me later asking for help because you weren't listening..._

_[B:] I am listening meanie! And you would help me anyways. I know you wouldn't turn me down San :D_

_[S:] Oh of course not. Never :)_

_[B:] So if I spend the rest of this class 'looking' at YOUR outfit then you'll help me later right?_

_[S:] Hmm that depends. How much are you willing to pay?_

_[B:] Pay? I was under the impression that your services were free…_

_[S:] Free? Do I look cheap to you? Honey, I come with a price._

_[B:] Well if you need payment I'm sure I could work something out so you can get free mouth work done..._

_[S:] Ha. Waaanky ...Wait what?_

_[B:] What?_

_[S:] I'm so lost now._

_[B:] …Yea me too._

_[S:] I thought we were having a funny conversation..._

_[B:] Yea me too but then I got confused because I read everything seriously unless there's a smiley next to pretty much everything… __:) - Like that! __I thought you really needed payment... And I work at a dentist office so... I don't get it. Which part was a joke?_

_[S:] Omg Britt, you are too funny..._

_[B:] Don't laugh at me!_

_[S:] I'm not laughing at you! I'm sitting right next to you! Do you SEE me laughing!?_

I look to my left and our eyes catch each other. I see her mouth mimicking mine as it spreads into a huge smile. It takes everything inside of me to hold back my laughter. I really didn't need another reason to shine the spotlight on me again. Last class was embarrassing enough. "Ahem!" My eyes move towards the noise and see our professor looking at us with an unamused expression. I see Brittany give her an apologetic smile and our professor turns back to her whiteboard to write more scribbles of unimportance to me.

Brittany kicks my left leg and turns back to her phone. My phone flashes '_1 New Message'_.

_[B:] Stop distracting me San. I think I'm going to have to find a different study partner. I'm pretty sure you missed just as much of what she said as I did ;P_

_[S:] Hey! You should be jumping off the walls to be my study buddy._

_[B:] Mhm. You have nooo idea ;D_

I look at her and see that she went back to taking notes. Her face looks like it has happiness written all over it. Maybe she catches me staring a few more times but I honestly don't know. The class ends and I realized that I spent the rest of the class just staring at her. She didn't seem to mind though because if she had caught me she hadn't made it known.

We pack our bags in silence and as we wait for our classmates to file out in a big mob-like fashion, we sit back down sideways on our chairs so we are facing each other. I see her reach her hands out towards me and I feel my stomach tighten. But she just puts them out in front of her, palms facing down. She gives me a shy smile. I then realize what it was she wanted me to do. I reach both my hands out towards hers and put them directly under hers, palms facing up. Her smile widens and she looks at our hands. Her face scrunches up and I recognize it as her concentrating. Suddenly I jerk my hands around hers and I slap the tops of her hands as she lets out a squeal. I start laughing loudly not caring if anyone is staring at this point.

"No fair! I wasn't ready!" she rubs her hands and then puts them back out in front of her, palms up. "Your turn!" She beams.

I hesitantly move my hands out and place them onto hers. I jerk back a couple of times because honestly this game is super suspenseful and I sometimes get way too into it. Even though the last time I played it was with a 2 year old. I get lost in my thoughts and she snaps her wrist up and slaps my hands. I pull away and we both fall into a fit of laughter.

After catching our breath she puts her hands out in front of her again. I smile and put my hands back on top of hers. We leave it like that for a while and It makes me almost forget that we were playing a game in the first place. We aren't even staring at our hands anymore. I'm so lost in her eyes, and I'm sure she's lost in mine because we both don't even realize that our entire class has left and the next class began filling up the seats.

We get knocked out of our gaze when some guy sits right behind us and in direct line of sight to our hands. He looks at our hands for a second and then back and forth from Brittany and me. I pull one hand back to my face to tuck some stray hair behind my ear. I was almost about to pull my other hand back when I feel Brittany's fingers curl around my hand as she stands up and throws her bag around her shoulder. I quickly do the same and she starts walking out of the class, bringing me with her, hand in hand. I look at our hands together in front of me and my insides turn to mush.

When we get out of class she doesn't let go. She slows her footsteps a bit so that I can catch up to her and we can walk side by side. My eyes glance to our hands, still together, and I let a smile creep onto my face. I feel her squeeze my hand and I chance a look at her. She's just looking at me, smiling. I don't even know where we are going. All I know is, I'll let this girl take me anywhere. As long as she's holding my hand that is.

* * *

I spend the rest of my day in classes that bore me to tears. I almost snapped earlier at some random girl who didn't know when to shut the fuck up in class. Seriously, no one cared and no one wanted to sit there for an extra 15 minutes while she went on and on. This chick could rival Berry.

I make my way to the bus stop and do my little happy dance on the inside when I see that there's no one there waiting. I love getting out of classes later in the day. Most of the students went home already and the buses aren't so packed. I walk up to one of the benches and sit on the very edge of it. I grab my IPod out of my bag and search for a good 'end of the day' song as I put one of the ear pieces in my ear. My eyes land on "Make You Feel My Love – Adele" and I click it. The piano starts and I immediately begin swaying my upper body with my hands clasping my IPod together between my knees.

_When the rain is blowing in your face_

_And the whole world is on your case_

_I could offer you a warm embrace_

_To make you feel my love._

I look around me to make sure there is still no one at the bus stop. I smile to myself and start to sing along.

"I know you haven't made your mind up yet

But I would never do you wrong

I've known it from the moment that we met

No doubt in my mind where you belong"

Oh yea, still got it.

"I really like your voice…"

I almost fall of the edge of the bench when I hear her voice. I recognized it immediately but it still scared the crap out of me. I hear her let out a laugh as she steps closer from behind me. She moves around the bench and takes a seat next to me.

"Next time you look to see if anyone is around you, make sure to look behind." She chuckles and nudges my shoulder with hers.

I feel my face blush as I nod. My eyes are focused on the ground now, too embarrassed to look at her.

"I mean it though. I really do like your voice. It's really pretty. Maybe I shouldn't have stopped you so I would've been able to hear more. But then if you found out I was standing there you would've thought I was being creepy… I'm not creepy. I promise."

I look up at her face. She's just looking forward. Does she just say everything she's thinking? Who does that? I don't know why but I kind of like it. It feels refreshing almost. I nudge her shoulder and when she looks at me I offer her the other side of my earphones. She smiles and takes it. She puts it in her ear and shifts so she's leaning into me looking at my IPod in my hands. I grin and move the IPod towards her, offering her to choose what to listen to. She moves her head to look at me and gives me a questioning look. I give her a smile and nod back at her. Her face brightens up and she grabs the IPod from my hands.

I watch her fingers work my IPod looking for something to listen to. But for some reason it almost seems like she knows what she wants to listen to and she knows it's already going to be in my IPod. I feel one of my eyebrows cock upwards as I try to figure out what she wanted to listen to. She goes straight to the 'Artist' tab and clicks it. As she's scrolling down my stomach sinks. I know where she's going. Her finger stops and clicks the tab. All I see now is a huge list of songs in the artist tab "Glee Club!" She giggles and moves her head to look at me again. She gives me a knowing look, one that says _'I knew it'_. I roll my eyes and shrug. I was so caught.

The bus comes after a couple of songs and we spend the rest of our bus ride listening to as many of my Glee Club songs we could fit in. She would try to dance awkwardly with the music but it just ended up looking ridiculous because one, we were sitting down, and two, we apparently had the worst bus driver ever today and he kept jerking around.

As we came close to her stop she gave me back my IPod. I don't think she realized how much of an honor it was for her to pick our music selection today. I literally NEVER let anyone touch my music. I don't think I've even let Quinn, my best friend since 8th grade, touch my IPod before. But with Brittany everything just comes so easily, like I _want_to open up to her.

The bus stops and the doors open. She turns and looks at me with a frown. I let out a little laugh. She then closes the gap in between us in a warm hug. At first I was caught off guard but then I relaxed into her embrace. When she pulls away I have to hold back a small whine, missing her warmth immediately. With that she smiles lightly at me and mouths a 'bye' before getting off the bus.

When the bus begins to move away from her I find myself following her with my eyes until the bus has moved too far. I let out a breath I was holding and sink into my chair. I can't believe how close we seem with each other and we seriously only just met on Monday. But I'm glad to have made a new friend. Possibly even a new 'best friend'. Or with the way I'm playing things out in my head possibly more? I should probably stop over thinking things. I don't even know if she's into me. She could just be really friendly… Who am I kidding? Of course she's into me. I'm fucking hot, and she's been flirting since day one. No. I need to find out for sure. Before I do something I'll regret and end up embarrassing myself. I pull out my phone and search for her number. When I find it I type out a text to her.

_[S:] Forgot to ask, are we still on for study group on Sunday?_

Study group is the perfect opportunity to do some research... on her of course. I'll meet her friends and see if she acts that way with them. It's like a genius plan. I almost feel tempted to pat myself on the back. My phone vibrates and I see that she texted me back.

_[B:] Oh yea! I forgot to tell you! Study Group is Sundays 7pm at that new 24 hour diner on 12th Ave. Know the place?_

_[S:] Yea I know it :) I'll see you there! Thanks again for inviting me._

_[B:] No problem ;P Just don't distract me from my homework like how you did in class today!_

_[S:] Whaaat? I was so not distracting you! And if I look back at our texts, YOU were the one to texted me first haha._

_[B:] That's only because you were 'STARING' at me ;P_

_[S:] Haha, AGAIN, I was NOT staring! I was looking at your outfit!_

_[B:] ohhhh I see.. So you were just 'looking' at my outfit the whole class? Yes, I did catch you 'looking'._

_[S:] …. It's a cute outfit…_

_[B:] Mhmm._

_[S:] Whatever… I'll see you Sunday!_

_[B:] Haha, ok. I'll make sure to wear something 'uncute' so that you don't get distracted by my outfit. Or maybe I'll be mean and wear something extra cute, just for you ;D_

_[S:] You are never going to let this go are you?_

_[B:] Never :P_

I notice I'm nearly at my stop now so I put my phone in my pocket and make my way to the back door. When it swings open I hop out and head home. Sunday, I'll see her on Sunday. I can't help but think that I won't survive if I have to go three days without seeing her. Ugh, why am I getting so attached? I need to calm down. I need to focus on staying focused. At least I'm off of work and school tomorrow.

As I walk up to my front door I see that Sugar's car is in the driveway and I sigh. She's my best friend and all but I don't really feel up to having to deal with her cheerfulness and that annoying voice today. I unlock the door and step in. I immediately regret living with her the moment I walk in.

"SANTANA!" she screams while jumping completely on me wrapping her arms and legs around my neck and waist.

"Mami! Seriously! How many times do I have to tell you not to do that! We've been living together for almost a year now and I swear you do it EVERY time..."

"Sorry... I just get really happy when you come home. Sometimes if I'm home alone too long I get this scary feeling that you're not gonna come home..." She wiggles her body off of me but still has her arms around me. I laugh and hug her back.

"I missed you too Sugar..." I pat her on the head a couple of times. "Okay now move, it's hot as hell and I needs ta rest my feets." She pulls away and smiles before letting go and walking back to the living room.

I drop my bag on the ground and make my way to sit on what I refer to as the most comfortable couch in the world. It only seats one so I pretty much have claimed it as mine. Sugar knows this so whenever I'm home she makes it a point to not occupy it. I know when I'm gone she uses it though. How could you not? It's that amazing. Seriously.

I close my eyes and swing my legs over the armrest while I lean back into the other side. I let a groan escape my lips. SO. FUCKING. COMFORTABLE. I hear Sugar laugh and I open my eyes to look at her.

"So you saw her today right? The girl from Monday? What was her name... Brenda? Bianca?... Beyonce?"

"Brittany..."

Saying her name made me smile. One of those stupid smiles that makes you look like a grinning idiot. Sugar sees it and points at me.

"OH MY GOD! You sooooooo like her!"

I give her an unamused look. "Well, I don't know if I 'like her like her' yet. She's just really nice. And I like to be around her. She was giving me all kinds of complements though, like about our songs from Glee Club. She really likes my voice. It was kind of embarrassing actually. I shouldn't have let her choose the music. Oh my god, what if she was just saying those things to be nice?"

"Woah, sweetie hold up. BREATHE. Lemme get this straight… You let her _touch_ your IPod? _And_ she picked the music?" I look at her and she has shock written all over her face. I give her a small nod. She sits back and her jaw looks like it fucking broke. It almost makes me laugh. She crosses her arms over her chest.

"When do I meet her? Seriously, she has magical powers or something." She says with a shrug. "I bet she could even make YOU study. If she just told you she would help, you would probably be there in two seconds."

I pause and think of my words before I say them. "Well actually, that's another thing I was going to talk to you about… I'm not gonna be able to do movie night this Sunday… I'm going to a study group with Brittany and her friends." I drop my head down as I say the last part. After a moment of awkward silence I look up to Sugar whose face is still in shock. Next thing I know she's laughing hysterically.

"Oh. My. God." She says between laughs. "This girl. You're so screwed Santana. You got it bad. It's ok though I was going to cancel anyways. I was asked to babysit for a couple more hours that night."

"Wait, you didn't get fired yet?" It was a serious question. She had a hard time holding on to a job for more than 2 days.

"I know right? Apparently having self-diagnosed Asperger's isn't a problem with this one. In fact the little girl just laughs at everything I say. And when her mom comes home it's like the exact same thing. I'm like totally awesome. Not that I didn't already know that."

"Wow. Ok well I guess it works out then."

"I can't believe she got you to study… from only meeting her twice too. I can't wait to meet her."

"Shut up mami, I'm studying because I told myself I have to do better this semester. That's the only reason I agreed."

"Uh huh, keep telling yourself that."

* * *

What do I wear? Okay think, what do normal people wear to study groups? I grab an outfit from my closet and lay it on my bed. Now how can I turn this into sexy but like discreetly sexy? I stare at it for a good 5 minutes before I turn around and fall onto my bed. I shouldn't be make this such a big deal. I'm only going to a study session and we won't even be alone. There'll be other people too. This is so not a date. I hear knocking on my bedroom door and it opens slightly, Sugar's head peeks in.

"Hey, need some help?" she asks and I nod. She bursts through the door and jumps on the bed while pushing me off. Turns out Sugar is the best person to help pick out outfits. She tells it how it is and I like that.

"Okay how about this?" I show her the outfit I was thinking about. She scrunches her nose and shakes her head.

"Noooo, not hot enough! Here lemme pick!" She jumps off my bed and goes straight to into my closet. I just stand back and watch, my hands on my hips.

"PERFECT!" She yells from inside the closet. I lift my eyebrow in anticipation to see what I will be wearing tonight. She comes out and hands me my clothes. I look through it and I smile.

"Thanks mami. You're the best" I give her a hug.

"No problem! I like that outfit on you, it really highlights what you got going on" She kisses me on the cheek before turning and walking out of my room.

I check my alarm clock by my bed. _5:48pm_. I sigh as I move to my computer to check the bus times. Let's see now, if I wanted to get there at 7 I need to leave my house by 6:15. Okay, I can do this. I'm going to go to the study group tonight and I'm going to learn either two things. She's either into me or she's not. I take a deep breath. I can do this.

* * *

I step off the bus and look at the time on my phone. _7:21pm. _Fucking bus driver, stopping for everyone. I don't care if it's his job or not. I'm late.

I round the corner and make my way to the front door of the diner. The moment I step in I realize it's completely empty. I pause and I look around. Was I in the wrong place? Is my time wrong?

"Hey! You made it! I was starting to think you weren't gonna come…" I look behind me and see Brittany walking through the back door. She stops when she comes close enough, her eyes drop to my body and I begin to feel the heat in my cheeks. She looks back to my face and I glance around the empty diner. I'm so confused. My face must be saying the same because she explains further. "Joel's family owns the place" she giggles as she reaches her hand out for me to grab. I take it and she pulls me towards the door she just came from. "They close from 7pm Sundays- 6am Monday so that they can clean and do some weird food inventory thingy. I honestly don't know what they said when they explained it to me, but they did give me free Jell-O after!" It was my turn to giggle now. She's so adorable. "So yea, we pretty much study here every Sunday."

We walk through the door and I'm greeted by 3 pairs of eyes. I force a smile, and I notice that they're all staring at our hands.

"Santana, this is Joel, Devin, and Ryan. Guys, Santana." She looks at me, a huge smile on her face. I wave a 'hi' at all of them. Her study group is a sausage fest. My heart aches now, because _of course_ she's straight. She's just friendly. She probably wouldn't have acted so close with me if she knew I was gay. I shift uncomfortably as I take my seat. We're sitting at a square table, Brittany on my left, Devin and Joel on my right, and Ryan across from me. I grab my laptop and my books out of my bag. I get right into my homework.

I soon feel everyone's eyes on me. I look up and everyone shoots their eyes back to their own work. I hear Joel let out a laugh he was trying to hold back. Devin lets out a laugh and shoves Joel's shoulder. Just then Ryan and Brittany burst into laughter. I'm so lost at this point I don't know if I should be laughing too. Were they laughing at me? They _were_ just staring at me after all. When they calm down I ask.

"What happened? Do I have something on my face?" I reach into my bag next to Brittany to grab my compact mirror. Brittany laughs as she reaches her hand up to mine to stop it.

"Santana, nothing is on your face. Sorry about that. We don't usually have other people come to these things so they were just kind of staring at you I guess. I'm sorry if we're freaking you out." I shake my head. Ryan sits forward to get my attention.

"No need to freak out by the way. I'm sorry if you feel uncomfortable in any way. We were in no way checking you out. Well, not us anyway." He looks towards Joel and Devin. Then he looks at Brittany, a grin on his face. "This one though, I'm not so sure" I snap my eyes to Brittany and I see her blushing.

"Your mean…" She says softly to him. She quickly glances at me and turns back to her homework. A smile makes its way to my lips.

"You two aren't very good at hiding your feelings you know." someone whispers in my ear and I almost scream. I hesitantly look towards the sound of the voice and see Joel leaning towards me smiling.

"What?" I ask him softly.

"You and Britt. It's really obvious. We thought maybe it was all in Britt's head when she talked about you but from the moment you both walked in, none of us had to even look at each other to confirm it." He's whispering now, probably to avoid making Brittany embarrassed.

"I-I don't understand."

"All I'm saying is that if you were wondering, the answer is yes. She does." With that he leans back and continues on with his homework.

I turn away from Joel and settle back into my work. Just then my computer flashes "New IM" and I click it. It's from someone in one of my classes.

_LadyUnicorn: You look especially distracting tonight :)_

My eyes meet Brittany's and give her a shy smile before I return to my computer.

_CaptSnix: Why thank you :) Not looking too bad yourself! Your friends scare me…_

_LadyUnicorn: What? Why? I'm sorry! They're just really excited. I'm usually the only girl in the group so they're just a little too excited to be around another one._

_CaptSnix: Really? Why? It's not like they're bad looking or anything. I'm sure they would have no problem getting a girl…_

Brittany lets out a loud laugh and everyone looks up instantly. She looks back at everyone and says sorry before going back to her computer.

_LadyUnicorn: San, they're all gay. They won't be 'getting a girl' anytime soon._

_CaptSnix: OHHHH. Okay now I'm embarrassed. Still doesn't explain them staring at me though…_

_LadyUnicorn: Oh that's just because you're hot._

_CaptSnix: … Brittany… I can't tell if your messages are serious or not. I need smiley faces… :) - Like that!_

_LadyUnicorn: I'm being half serious half joking. Yes, you are definitely hot. But no, that's not why they were staring. __Wait! Are you making fun of me!?_

I let out a giggle and look at her. She tries to kick me under the table but manage to dodge it.

"Stop IMing each other and do your homework!" I look to see Devin giving us a knowing look.

"We're not IMing each other." Brittany tries to lie. I giggle again.

"Lies. If I had a video of the both of you for the past 5 minutes it would look like two idiots smiling at their computer screens."

Brittany and I make eye contact. Both of our lips are pursed together trying to hold back our laughter. We had been caught in the act. I go back to my computer and she does the same.

_CaptSnix: You got me in trouble! D: _

_LadyUnicorn: You got you in trouble. You're the one that decided to wear THAT tonight ;P_

_CaptSnix: Ok really, It's just a simple outfit. How is this hot at all? _

_LadyUnicorn: Maybe I'm just being biased. Personally, I think you would be hot in anything really._

_CaptSnix: Oh yea? How about if I were wearing a unicorn fur coat? Would It still be hot to you, LadyUnicorn?_

_LadyUnicorn: Oh my! How did you know that was one of my turn ons? Let's get out of here! :P (p.s. You better be joking. Unicorns are magical creatures. You shouldn't harm them for their fur. They might get mad)_

_CaptSnix: Haha don't worry Britt. I was definitely kidding. You're adorable btw._

_LadyUnicorn: Stop flirting and do your homework._

That was odd. I look up to Brittany and see that she's fighting Ryan for her computer back. "Heeeeey! You said you wouldn't write anything!" Ryan laughs and moves farther away from her, closer to Devin now.

"I had to Britt. You guys are distracting us." He looks to Joel and Devin.

"Yea seriously guys, It's really hard to concentrate when something this adorable is happening right in front of us." Joel says with adoring eyes.

"What are you guys even writing to each other that's making you both smile that much?" Devin asks as he and Joel look onto the screen of Brittany's Laptop.

I blush and Brittany just shrugs.

"You thought we were straight!?" Joel nearly screams. I shrug again and Devin laughs.

"Britt, maybe you should've mentioned that this was a rainbow only study group when you invited her to save us all from the awkwardness." Ryan tells her as he hands her the computer back.

"Well I would've but I didn't want to assume… And if she wasn't then that means she can't come." She frowns.

Almost simultaneously all eyes fall on me, waiting to hear what I had to say to that. Well this is weird.

"I-uh- … Yea. Last time I checked I was pretty gay." I glance at Brittany. She has the smallest smile on her lips. I smile back at her. I keep my eyes locked on hers when I speak up again. "So… does that mean _everyone_ here is gay?" I study her face as her lips grow into a deeper smile and she nods. No one else answers my question. But it's not like I noticed.

* * *

"This was really fun. Who knew studying could be so much fun?"

"San, we barely did our homework! We kept messaging each other all night."

"Well, it's not like you were complaining. Thank you for inviting me."

"No problem. And they didn't scare you did they? Are you gonna come again next time?"

"Actually, I think I will. Your friends are really cool."

"Well I'm glad."

We leave the conversation at that as we continue to walk on the sidewalk. It was about 9:30pm now and Brittany told me her back was starting to hurt so we decided to take a break from studying and walk around the block. It wasn't a scary neighborhood so I told the guys they could just stay back. Plus I kind of wanted some alone time with Brittany.

We walk around the block a few times in silence, but it was a comfortable silence, like we didn't need to say anything. Like walking together alone was good enough for the both of us.

It starts to drizzle when we find ourselves back in front of the diner. I look at her and see that she's looking up into the night sky, smiling. She moves her palms face up as she speaks.

"I love the rain…" She looks at me, "One more round? Please?"

I smile back to her. "Sure."

Her face brightens as we both fall back into step, side by side. She links her arm with mine and pulls herself into my side. We're walking slower this time. Feeling the rain hit our bodies softly. When we're almost completely around the block again, I notice the rain has picked up. It wasn't really drizzling anymore, but it wasn't really pouring. She slows down her steps even more. It confuses me for a second when she lets go of my arm and moves onto the street. She then does something I'm sure I'll never forget, no matter how hard I try.

She starts _dancing_.

She was dancing on the street, in the rain. I'm not much of a dancer but I could tell she was, and a talented one at that. It was a slow, ballet type dance. It didn't look forced or even choreographed. It was just simple, and sweet. She moved across the pavement so gracefully. She kept up with my pace as I was still walking forward. Every so often I would catch a glimpse of her face, eyes closed, and a tiny smile playing on her lips. It was amazing to watch her. It was breathtaking. She danced the rest of the way to the diner.

"I didn't know you danced" I tell her softly as she steps up the curb to stand in front of me. "You're really good you know." She blushes as she looks down. I see a raindrop fall from the tip of her nose as she does. I grab her hand and give it a light squeeze. She looks up. "Come on, the guys are probably wondering where we are." She nods and lets me guide her into the diner.

When we walk through the front door we get hit with the chill of the air conditioner and I quickly realize how wet both of our clothes are. We walk to the backroom and everyone looks up at the same time. I could tell they were worried.

"There you two are! I was this close to coming out there with a baseball bat to find you guys!" Ryan says giving us a gesture with his hands. I roll my eyes and giggle.

"Why are you guys wet?" Joel asks with his head tilted to the side.

"That better not be sweat…." Devin says while giving us a glare.

"Devin!" Brittany snaps. I look at her and she blushes again. "It was raining…"

"Ohhhhh ok. That makes a lot more sense now." Joel says with a laugh. He looks at me and smiles. "Did she dance?" I must've looked confused because he explains further. "No matter what she's doing, if it's raining, she'll go outside to dance." I look at Brittany and quirk one of my eyebrows up.

"Is that true?" I ask her. She nods.

* * *

"You guys live kind of close to each other right? Maybe you should share a cab?" Ryan looks at us. It was 11pm now and we all decided to call it a night. Plus we all had class the next day. Brittany looks at me and I shrug telling her I didn't mind. She smiles and finishes packing her bag. Joel walks into the room to let us know that he just called for our cabs and that it should be here soon.

"Can we wait outside?" Brittany asks me after I finish packing my bag, her voice unsure. I know why though, she wants to be in the rain. I chuckle as I grab her hand and lead the way. When we get outside I notice the smile on her face widen.

"So I guess I should get dropped off first? Since my house is closer than yours? Assuming that your house is by your bus stop of course." I ask her.

"Oh ok. Yea it is." She points at the street and my eyes follow. "Cab's here."

We spend most of our ride talking about her friends. Honestly her friends are hilarious. I get along with them really well, which is surprising because I don't get along with anyone, seriously, I hate people. But her friends just took me in instantly. Although they didn't get to see 'Snix' come out or anything, I have a feeling that even if they had seen my other evil personality, they wouldn't mind.

We make it to my house and I reach into my bag to grab my wallet. Brittany grabs my wrist. I look at her and she smiles back at me. "I got it Santana. Think of it as a 'thank you for coming' gift. I'm really glad you came." I shake my head as I try to go for my wallet again but her grip holds my hand in place. She laughs, "Seriously! Don't worry about it, I'm happy to pay."

"Fine…" I relax my arm and she lets go. I look into her eyes. I almost forget that we're in a cab and I need to get out so she can go home. She moves closer to me and wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me into a hug. I can smell her hair again now. I close my eyes and hold our embrace for longer. Finally I let go and frown. "Alright, well I should let you go. But I'll see you tomorrow right?" She nods. I get out and wave one more time before shutting the car door.

The car speeds off right away and I'm left standing there, wishing the night hadn't finished. I make my way to the front door and unlock it. I swing the door open and step in as I drop my bag to the ground. I close the door behind me and as I do I sneeze. And then continue to sneeze four more times in a row. _Fuck. _I better not be getting sick. I make my way to the kitchen and grab the 'Airborne' from the top cabinet. I cannot get sick. I need to be able to go to school tomorrow. I need to see her.

After a quick shower I get ready for bed. I walk into my bedroom and fall onto my bed. I'm so tired. I fall asleep in that position thinking of Brittany and how I'll get to see her soon. The last thought in my head is '_I better not be sick'._

I don't see Brittany's _'Goodnight San, sweet dreams :)'_ text till I wake up next morning. My head is throbbing. _Shit._

* * *

**Reviews keep me motivated! Haha, I have no shame :D**


	3. Don't Ask, Don't Tell

**AN: I will be going on a trip for about three weeks starting tomorrow. So I'm leaving you with a kinda short chapter. But don't worry because LOTS of new info. If that's what you want to call it :P I'm not entirely happy with how the chapter came out, but I needed to post it before leaving. I'm going to write as much as I can while I am away and if I can, I'll try to continue to post more chapters. Just don't think I fell of the planet! I'll be back! **

**Again, thank you to everyone who Favorited, Followed and Reviewed!**

* * *

Chapter 3: Don't Ask, Don't Tell

**Brittany POV**

I let out a sigh as I lean back into my seat while the cab pulls away from the curb. After the night I just had, I know for a fact that I'm not making things up in my head. Even though we didn't actually confirm it with each other, it was known. It was unspoken, and it was simple. I like her, and she likes me. I start to smile when that realization hits me. _She likes me_. I don't even feel weird about the fact that we've only known each other for a week and I know absolutely nothing about her.

But then, something dawned on me that instantly slapped the smile from my face.

_She knew absolutely nothing about me._

* * *

As I dragged myself up the steps I tiredly ran my eyes over the people already occupying the bus. It was more crowded than usual so it took me longer to focus on where Santana was sitting, or not sitting. She's not here.

I frowned, and made my way to an empty seat. As soon as I sat I grabbed my phone out of my bag. Just as I'm about to press send I lock my phone again. I shouldn't text her. I don't want her to think I'm being needy. It was barely six hours since I last saw her. It's not like I _need _to see her on the bus, I reason with myself. Although it does make me incredibly sad that I won't get to see her until class. Maybe she just missed the bus or something. I'll ask her in class.

When our professor walks in and begins class, I look to my right and see an empty chair. She never came to class. I frown again as I go into my bag to grab my notebook and pencil. My phone falls into view after pulling out my pencil case and I stare at it for a minute. Finally I reach for it and hesitantly send Santana a text. It wouldn't be weird now, it's normal for a _friend _to worry about this right?

_[B:] Hey! Where are you? I was hoping to get in some good distracting before falling asleep in class ;) Seriously though, just making sure you're okay…_

I force my attention back to my professor and try to take notes. My phone vibrates in my pocket and my stomach tightens. I unlock it and Santana's name flashes across the screen.

_[S:] I was wondering when you would text me ;) I'm not coming to school… Sorry Britt, but I wouldn't be very distracting today with the amount of snot shooting out my nose -_-_

She's sick? Oh god, is it because the rain? I made her walk around in the freaking rain. How stupid am I?

_[B:] OMG San, I'm so sorry! It was the rain wasn't it? I feel so bad… I shouldn't have made you walk with me…_

_[S:] Haha, Britt it's okay, really. I loved walking in the rain with you. It was the best part of my night actually. To be honest, I really did try to make it to the bus stop today, but my roommate caught me and basically locked me inside the house._

_[B:] San, if you know you're sick, why would you push yourself to go to school? And I'm still sorry for making you sick… :(_

_[S:] Britt! Stop saying sorry! I already told you that I'm fine. I'm just gonna stay home today, watch some Sweet Valley High, and attempt to make myself soup from a can. And by 'attempt' I mean, 'pour in bowl and microwave' haha :)_

_[B:] Sweet Valley High? Haha, cute. Wait, your roommate isn't gonna take care of you?_

_[S:] Hey, it's a good show! And no, she asked if I wanted her to stay but I knew she had work so I made her go. It's okay though, I can take care of myself. I'm a big girl haha._

_[B:] San… Heating up canned soup in the microwave is NOT taking care of yourself. It's sad. Everyone should always have someone to take care of them when they get sick. It's like a rule or something._

_[S:] Haha Britt, I'm like MILES away from my friends and family right now, I can't really ask them to fly down here just because I have the sniffles. I've been surviving just fine with my microwaved canned soup thank you very much :)_

_[B:] Okay no. I'm coming over. You are NOT going to eat canned soup today._

I press send before my brain tells me to stop. _Shit_, that was too far. I'm really starting to push this friendship. I need to stop doing that but sometimes I say or do things before I get the chance to think about it. Like now for example, before I realize it I'm up from my seat and heading for the door. My phone vibrates in my hand and I almost drop it, forgetting I was still holding it. I make it to the bus stop and look at the text message.

_[S:] What? Britt no, you're not coming over. I'm fine, stay in class. I promise I won't eat the goddamn canned soup. I'll try and make something else. Don't miss your classes for me please. You're gonna make me feel bad._

I roll my eyes at that. I quickly send her a text back before walking up to the bus that pulled up a second ago.

_[B:] Too late, I'm on the bus._

There's a long pause before she sends me a message back. I smile at it for a whole 5 minutes.

_[S:] Thank you…_

* * *

"Hello?"

"Hey! I'm just calling to let you know that I won't be making it to our lunch date today."

"What? Why? This better be good Britt…"

"Don't be mad at me okay…"

"Oh god, what did you do? It better be a good enough reason for me to miss staring at Joel while he works."

I laugh at him and roll my eyes. I don't understand why Devin needs me to be there with him to flirt. It's not like he pays attention to me anyways, even though I do tend to ramble on and on about my endless knowledge of cats.

"I'm on the bus… heading to Santana's house. She's sick so I'm gonna go take care of her."

He says nothing.

"I'm so sorry Devin! I know how much you look forward to our lunches. You can still go without me! Honestly, it's pretty obvious that you two like each other. It's not like you both don't know. Why can't you guys just tell each other so I don't have to keep spending money on crepes every time he's working?"

"That's because he needs to make the first move Britt. You know how I am, I can't put myself out there like that. I don't care how glaringly obvious it is that he likes me. He needs to step up first."

"It's more like PAINFULLY obvious." I say with a giggle.

"Whatever Brittany, you're one to talk. You and Santana clearly have a thing for each other. I mean, aren't you going over there right now? I explicitly remember you telling us that you were just flirting, and that you didn't want anything from it."

"I AM just flirting. And don't bring this around on me. You know damn well why I can't get involved with anyone…" I tell him with a bit of irritation in my voice.

"I know, I know. Sorry. It's just, you need to be careful B, she seems nice and I don't want any of you to end up hurt. From the looks of it though, I think you might actually really like this girl. You're already ditching your classes for her. Which I do not approve of by the way."

"Yea I know, I guess I just can't help it though. Also I don't know what I feel yet, but I'll let you know later how it goes."

"Well if it's something you want B, then you deserve it. It's been a while since I've seen you like this. Not since before, _you know._" He doesn't need to explain more, knowing that I'll understand enough.

"Thanks Devin."

"No problem. But if you do make the decision to go for it, just make sure to do it right okay?"

"Yea… Oh and Devin?"

"Hmm?"

"Just ask Joel out already." I add with a smirk.

"I hate you..."

"Love you too!"

* * *

I can kind of remember where she lives since I've only just seen it last night so I pretty much guess as to what bus stop I need to get off at. When I near it, I pull down on the cord to signal the bus driver to stop. I hop out and make my way down the sidewalk, trying to remember which street was Santana's. Thankfully it was hard to forget because I remember seeing Christmas lights still up on one of the corner houses last night. I remember smiling because it was the only house that still had them up.

I turned into the street and looked at the houses around me, trying to remember which house was hers. When I found it I make my way to the front door and ring the doorbell. I hear someone shuffling inside and I try to look through the front window. Just then I feel my phone vibrate and I pull it out of my pocket to read the text.

_[S:] It's open. Down the hall, turn left. I'm the big lump occupying the couch :) don't mind the mess… I tried to clean up but I was pretty useless._

I laugh to myself as I open the door. I walk down the hall and when I reach the living room I find Santana curled up on a one-person couch with a blanket wrapping around her. Can she be any cuter?

"You shouldn't leave your front door open if you can't even get up to clean. What if I were a burglar? You wouldn't be able to defend yourself."

She moves her head up and looks at me, my hands on my hips, giving her a scolding stance. She gives me a smile before quirking one of her eyebrows up.

"If you were a burglar I'm pretty sure I could take you." She says through a smirk. I roll my eyes and sit down on the couch next to her. She puts her head back onto the armrest and snuggles the blanket closer.

"I wasn't sure what you had in your kitchen so I picked up a few things." I planned to cook my special soup. I only ever make it when someone is sick though. I tried to cook it when I was sick once but it turned out really bad and had to tell Devin make it for me. I made him swear not to tell anyone my recipe. Not even the other guys.

"Britt, you don't need to cook me anything. I'm fine with just your company, really." She says, keeping her eyes on the television screen.

"But, my soup is really good, and it'll make you feel better…" I tell her. She lifts her head again and looks at me, studying my face for a second. I wonder what she's thinking.

"Thank you." She whispers it so softly that I barely even hear it. I share a shy smile with her before standing to my feet. I stand there and look around awkwardly trying to figure out which way the kitchen is. "Kitchen's around the corner. You're gonna have to go searching for all the pots and stuff. I'm barely in there," I look at her and she shrugs, "my roommate does all the cooking, I do all the eating."

* * *

"Oh, what the hell Britt? This shit is amazing! What did you put in this?" Santana says while spooning more soup into her mouth. I giggle and pour myself a bowl too. "Seriously though, I think I'm going to have to keep Devin away from you when you get sick so you can teach this recipe to me." She pauses her eating and keeps the spoon halfway to her mouth. She rolls her eyes, "Or maybe I'll just come by when you're sick so that Devin can cook it and I can just eat some." I laugh at her and she shrugs.

"It's just something I came up with. But, you should feel honored to even be having my special soup, I don't make it for just anyone you know. But you're kinda special too so it's okay." I blush and look at my soup.

I look up just in time to catch her eyes looking back before she quickly averts them back to her own soup. She clears her throat to break the silence, "I'm really happy you're here Brittany." She pauses and begins to awkwardly stir her soup. "I-I think I might-" She stops stirring and she glances up, our eyes meeting. "I think I might like y-" my eyes widen at her words, _SHIT_.

Just then my cell phone rings and the sound echoes loudly throughout the room. I let out the breath I was holding and feel relief instantly. Whoever is calling me is officially my new best friend. I reach for my phone on the table and give Santana an apologetic look. She just nods softly, looking almost disappointed. I look at my phone and panic takes over again when I see who it is.

Quickly, I stand and walk to the other end of the room, farthest from Santana. I glance back to her and see her trying to hide the questioning look in her eyes. I take a deep breath before answering.

"Hello?" I surprised myself by how soft my voice was. Why was I hiding?

"Hey hun!" The woman on the phone almost yells, but changes to a whisper after realizing how quietly I answered. "Why are we whispering?" I look at Santana who is stirring her soup, pretending not to listen.

"I'm not" I say more loudly, trying to sound normal again. "Did you need something?" I pressed. I need to get off this phone. I thought someone calling was a blessing, saving me from the conversation that was about to happen with Santana, but now I think it has somehow made it worse and much more awkward.

"I was just calling because you forgot your book at home. I can bring it to you if you want."

"No it's okay, I'll just share with someone." I need to think fast. "Listen I gotta go, I'm in class." The moment the words left my mouth I glanced at the clock on the wall and internally slapped myself in the face. _9:12 am. _I bit my lip into my mouth and shook my head to calm myself. I see Santana shift and I look back at her. Her eyes are definitely questioning me now. She knows I'm lying. And she knows that I don't actually have class right now. Usually at this time we would be finishing our coffees in the cafeteria before Santana has to go to class. _She knows I'm lying. _

"What? I thought you had a break from 8:30 to 10:00? I can get there in like half an hour Britt, it's no big deal. Plus I kinda want an excuse to get outta this house. You know what? I'm just gonna bring it to you. Where did I put my keys now…"

"NO!" I nearly screamed. I scared myself again, but this time because of how loud I was. I looked at Santana who clearly was scared from my outburst too. "Sorry about that." I say softer, and to both of them. "No really it's okay, I don't need my book. I'm about to go into a meeting with one of my professors now though so I won't be able to see you if you come before my next class anyways." My eyes are still on Santana, whose eyes are slowly changing from questioning to confusion. _She knows I'm lying._

"Alright, fine. Are you going to come home early today? I'm bored already." She says.

"I only left at like 6:00! I'll be home again as soon as I can. Geez, miss me much?" I say out loud without thinking. _Crap, I hope that didn't sound as bad as I thought. _I looked at the girl still sitting at the table, her eyes wide. _Shit._

The disappointed look comes back to her face as she stands and goes into the living room. I notice how her shoulders sank, defeated. When I can't see her anymore I curse at myself under my breath. I'm such an idiot.

"Britt?" The woman's voice over the phone brings me back into the conversation. "Are you there?"

"Yea, I'm here. Sorry. I gotta go though, I'll see you at home?"

"Okay..."

We say our goodbyes and I throw my phone onto the counter and make my way to the living room to find Santana. She's sitting on her couch, her hands playing with the hem of her shirt. She looks at me and I swear if I look close enough I can almost see her putting her walls back up behind her eyes. She stiffens when I step closer. "Important phone call?" She asks, her eyes stabbing through mine.

"I'm sorry." I offer but she keeps her stare. It was the first time I felt uncomfortable around her. "Maybe I should go…" At those words I see her sink noticeably into her seat. Did she not want me to go? She didn't really seem happy with me. What must she think of me now? "Are you mad I lied?" I asked, and I could tell the question caught her off guard.

"What? Why would I be mad?" She throws back.

"You just seem mad at me or something..." I look down and shuffle my feet against the floor.

"I was just, surprised I think." I moved my eyes back to hers, it's softer now. "Why _did_ you lie Britt?" She moved back to playing with her shirt. I could tell she was thinking of the right words to say. "Was it because you should be at school? Or was it because you shouldn't be _here_?" My throat tightened at her words. What was she insinuating?

_You don't know anything about me. _I thought to myself. I had no reason to lie. I just panicked, I needed to get off the phone and that was the best excuse I could think of. But I couldn't tell her that, she would just keep asking questions. Questions that I know she doesn't want to hear answered.

A couple of minutes passed and I began to pack my things. She noticed what I was doing and spoke again. "Wait, don't go." It surprised me a little and I looked at her. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm prying, it's none of my business. It's probably because I'm sick. Just, don't go Britt." Her eyes searching mine now. It was almost like a complete 180 degree turn from before. She seemed so upset but now she just looks sad. What happened to her? Something in the past for sure.

"Okay," I begin, "I'll stay." I look around trying to find something that will lighten the atmosphere. I smile at the box set of 'Sweet Valley High' and walk towards it. I slide the first disk into the DVD player and press play. I move back onto the couch and tuck my legs under me to get comfortable.

We soon went back to the comfortable silence between us. It wasn't weird and awkward anymore. It was like my phone conversation from earlier never happened, and I was glad.

I lasted a good four and a half episodes before I fell asleep. To tell the truth, I was exhausted. I stayed out late last night and hardly got any sleep because I was finishing some of the homework I never got a chance to even look over. Then I had to get up early to get ready for class, only to have caught the bus all the way to campus just to get back on another bus and make the trip to Santana's house. It feels good to be able sleep.

* * *

When I woke up I felt warmth across my body. My eyes, still opening slowly, moved across Santana's face. Her eyes are closed, her chest rising and falling at a steady pace, her breath striking my collarbone. She must've come by me when I fell asleep. I looked at the clock, _7:07 pm. _I've been sleeping for about six hours now. Great, I won't be sleeping tonight now.

Santana mumbled against my shoulder and it brought my mind back to that fact that she was _right there._She was pressed so closely to me, but it felt so normal. I can smell her hair now, it was subtle and sweet. With every tiny exhale I felt her breath against me. I smiled tiredly when she shifted to snuggle closer to me and I realized she was clutching the bottom of my shirt in a balled up fist. I brushed some hair from her face before speaking.

"Santana..." I whispered softly while rubbing her back. "San, wake up. Is it okay for me to leave now? When does your roommate get back?" She shifted again but this time moved her head to look at me and I smiled at her. "How are you feeling? Tired?" She nodded at first and then rested her head back on my chest, grabbing my shirt into her hand again. I giggled at her attempt to go back to sleep. "San, I need to go." She shook her head and mumbled something, the grip on my shirt tightening. "Want me to put you to bed? It's probably more comfortable there." I asked while rubbing her back again and she nodded.

As I walked with Santana to her bedroom I wondered what kind of bedroom I would be walking in on. When she opened the door and stepped inside I followed closely behind. The first thing to catch my eyes was the giant stuffed dinosaur. It was hard to imagine Santana being able to sleep comfortably on her bed with such a huge dinosaur occupying basically the whole thing.

Santana went straight for her bed, hugging the blanket from earlier. As she got herself comfortable she instinctively reached out to spoon her dinosaur. I giggled at her, still by the door. She looked at me and shrugged. "I won him/her at the fair a year ago," she eyed the ceiling with a small smile on her lips, "I still haven't named it. My roommate started calling it 'stranger' and I guess it sorta stuck." She looked back to me, the smile still present.

"I think 'Stranger' is a cute name." I smiled back. Her face softened and she looked away.

"Well, you better get going. I'm sorry I kept you so long. You can just leave the front door unlocked. My roommate probably forgot her house keys anyways. Thank you so much for today B. You have no idea how much it means to me that you came here." She blushes and tries to hide it by ducking her head more, but I caught it.

I look at my surroundings again, Santana's smell was strong in here. I noticed a small corkboard hanging on her wall over the dresser. It was covered in pictures of her and a bunch of people I only slightly recognize. If I remember correctly, the people occupying most of the pictures are her Glee Club friends. The walls were a much darker shade then the rest of the house, but it somehow suited her well. A few things scattered on her desk and I notice a red and white pom-pom hanging by the closet. Was she a cheerleader in High School? My eyes find their way back to Santana's, her eyebrow quirked upwards. I laugh at her before taking a step backwards, ready to leave.

"I really hope you feel better Santana, my soup should do the trick though. It never fails." I say with pride. "G'night San, sweet dreams." And with that I walk out. I turn to close her door but stop myself. I hear her whisper softly to herself.

_I don't think it's your soup that cures people Britt, it's you… _

I blushed as I took a stuttered step back. How? How is it that she can feel like this towards me? Especially after what happened earlier. How could she just brush it off like it never happened? Maybe she just doesn't care about the details like everyone else does.

When I get outside I close my eyes and smell the outside air. Maybe, just maybe, I've found someone who won't care about my past. The thought of that made me feel both excited and scared.

* * *

"We need to talk. NOW." I say before Devin even has a chance to say hello.

"No need to say more. Texting the others as we speak!"

"Joel's Diner?"

"As always."

"See you guys in thirty."

_Click._

* * *

I make my way to the door of the diner and fling it open, crossing the threshold with determination. I stride straight to our usual booth and already see my friends waiting patiently. When they see me they smile but quickly drop it to a frown when they see the troubled look on my face. When I sit down, no one dares to say anything. Finally, Devin breaks the silence.

"I take it that it didn't go so good?" I look at him and then to the others, whose faces were filled with concern. I pull my hands up to my face, cradling it, and resting my elbows on the table.

"Awww sweetie, it's okay. What happened? What went wrong?" Ryan reaches across and rubs one of my arms. I shake my head still cradled by my hands.

"Nothing, nothing was wrong. That's the problem…" I say softly but loud enough for them all to hear it. I look up and look at my friends.

Devin, Joel, Ryan, and Eric, _my best friends. _

"Damn B, what the hell happened? You're making me regret taking that late shift at the bar last night. This girl Santana, she's got you doesn't she?" Eric asks. Ryan shushes him quickly.

"Eric, stop talking and let her tell us what the hell happened!"

So I did. I told them the whole story. How much it confused me. I didn't know what to think of any of it. How I still am confused as to why she is being so nice to me. Why, after hearing the conversation I had or what it most definitely _sounded_ like, would she be so kind still. At the end of it all I slumped into my seat as I ran my fingers through my hair.

It went silent for a moment. Everyone's eyes catching each others.

"Wow." Devin finally comments.

"Yea." I answer back.

"Now I really regret not meeting her." Eric adds and I sigh.

"I don't get it guys. She barely even pressed me about it. It was like it didn't matter, like she didn't need to know."

"Maybe she's blinded? Maybe it's like she heard you talking but pushed her feelings about it down." Joel offers.

"Yea, like she doesn't want to ask the hard questions because she afraid that she won't like the answers? Maybe she just wants to pretend to go on like it never happened until you're the one to break the seal." Ryan explains.

"But why would she do that? If that's the truth then she would know that it would only hurt her more in the long run. Why would anyone put themselves through that?" I asked them, I was so confused.

"She was hurt before." Eric says softly. "I'm just guessing of course but to me, it sounds like she was hurt and she wants to cling to this thing you guys started for as long as she can."

"Wow Eric, way to lighten the mood. That the most depressing thing I've ever heard." Joel says.

"What? All I'm saying is I can sympathize. I know how it feels when you like someone but you don't want to mess it up. You'd ignore any signs of heartbreak just so you can hold on to what is good." I see him glance at Ryan before looking down to his hands.

"Yea, I think I know what you mean…" Devin adds quietly, looking towards Joel. It gets quiet again but this time no one is looking at each other. Except for me, I watch as I catch every single one of them try to steal a glance or two towards there 'secret' crush. I roll my eyes before breaking out into a laugh. Everyone turns their attention to me as I come back from my laughing fit.

"Oh man, you guys need some serious help." I smile at them and they just smile back.

"Well right now, we are here to help you B. So what's the verdict? Do you think you might actually like her? Like for real? Enough to tell her?" Joel asks me. The other three lean in closer, waiting for my response.

"I- I don't know guys. I mean I barely know her but when I'm with her, she makes me feel like I don't need to hide anything from her."

"So when do _I _get to meet her?" Eric asks.

"Eric, shush. Next time don't take the late shift at the bar!" Ryan says as he rolls his eyes and slaps his friend on the shoulder.

"Yea well I gotta make enough money to keep up with all this diner food!"

"You eat here for free! And you eat the most too!" Joel yells at him.

I sit back and watch them all go back and forth arguing with each other. I laugh a couple times here and there. Especially when Eric throws Devin a pointed look before saying, "Shut up and go eat a crepe!" which in turn makes Devin's mouth drop open and blush. Soon their back and forth banter turns into a laughing riot and everyone in the diner is starting to stare.

"I love you guys so much, thanks for coming out to meet me." I tell them after we've all settled down.

"No problem Britt, you would do the same for us." Ryan tells me with a smile.

* * *

"Thanks for driving me home Eric." I look over at him in the driver's seat.

"No problem B! Besides, I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. I needed to make sure my favorite 'Lady-Lover' friend is taken care of." He says with a grin.

"I'm your only 'Lady-Lover' friend Eric."

"The one and only!" he adds in and we laugh together. We've been saying that to each other ever since we met. We instantly became best friends shortly afterwards and that's how I came to meet Ryan and Devin. Joel came afterwards because Devin was crushing on a certain crepe maker. We made friends easily and he too fell into place with our group.

"Can I ask your honest opinion?" I looked at him with seriousness. He nods. "I don't know what is worst. Telling her about it too soon or telling her too late. If I tell her too soon, she could get scared and think that I'm going to fast, but if I tell her too late then, it'll just blow up in my face." I look down at my hands on my lap. "When will I know to tell her?"

"Just wait till you see her again B. Give her the reigns and see which way she wants to take it. If she wants to know and you think it's safe, tell her. I think if she doesn't ask, don't tell. If it's the latter though, you have to be careful. You could both be hurt really badly from the secrecy of it all." He shifts in his seat to face me now. "If you both get too attached to the good, the bad will be way worse."

I look to my side to study his face. It looks so sad and layered with experience. I lean forward and give him a warm hug while muttering a thank you. I step out of the car I tell him good night before shutting the door. Watching him drive off made me miss my friends again. I'm glad I got to talk to them about it though. They always know the right things to say to cheer me up.

* * *

The next day I wake up to the sound of my phone buzzing. I reach over to my side table and answer it without bothering to look who it was.

"Hello?" my voice cracked from my tired state.

"Are you still sleeping Britt-Britt?" The voice on the other side said. Then my mind registered who the voice belonged to. I pulled the phone away from my face and squinted at the screen. _Santana_. "Hello? Brittany? Are you sleeping? It's almost one in the afternoon Britt."

I was still frozen. I hadn't planned on talking to Santana until Wednesday. I was going to ignore her and wait till she was actually right in front of me before letting her decide for me which way to take things. I wasn't ready for this right now. I wouldn't know what to say to her. Plus I was too afraid of what she would decide on.

I decided to pretend to be asleep still. I mumbled something incoherent into my phone, which wasn't too hard because my body was still half asleep. My mind on the other hand, was wide awake now.

"Brittany are you seriously sleeping right now? How did you manage to answer your phone?" I hear her giggle. She acting like she did yesterday, like nothing happened. "Oh my god, you're totally sleeping on me right now. Fine, I'm just gonna text you. You better call me back when you wake up! I was just calling to let you know that your soup should win a freaking Nobel Prize or something. I feel amazing and it's all thanks to you. You're a genius Brittany. Thank you." _Click. _

I dragged my phone down to my chest, feeling my heart pounding. She was acting completely normal. The phone vibrated on top of me and I unlocked it to read the message.

_[S:] Britt-Britt, you are amazing. When you wake up you better call me. I was hoping to 'get in some good distracting' before I have to sit in on a boring extra credit lecture :) But seeing as you're sleeping, I guess I could settle for a phone call ;P _

I put my phone down next to me. She was exactly as she was before. I guess I won't need to wait till tomorrow to hear what she decided. She just told me.

_She won't ask, I won't tell._

* * *

**AN: I wasn't planning on even mentioning Brittany's past in this chapter but it kind of made its way in there, and it became like the whole chapter. Any mention of her secrets was supposed to actually be in a much later chapter. Let me know what you think! Any guesses? Review! Review! Review!**


	4. Finally

**AN: I'm back! I know some people had troubles with the last chapter and I hope this chapter makes up for that. Just remember that everything I reveal about Brittany is yet another piece to a big picture. I want to keep the story to a proper pace.**

**Italicized**** sections are flashbacks.**

* * *

Chapter 4: Finally…

**Santana POV**

_"Hey big spender! Spend a little time with me!"_

Of all the things that could ruin my nap, it has to be Sugar. I think I would rather be waken by a pack of hungry wolves.

"Aurgggh" is all I manage to mutter into my phone. I don't know what possessed me to even answer my damn phone. I think I was trying to aim for the ignore button but missed horribly.

"Wake up up up!" she practically screams through the phone. I groan and roll to my side, leaving the phone behind me on the opposite side of the pillow. I look at my alarm clock on my night stand and try to focus my eyes to read the time. _8:24 pm. _I barely had two hours of sleep.

I throw one of my pillows behind my head to cover my phone because I can still hear Sugar. I think she's screaming, no, singing? Or trying to sing at least, girl got issues. At least it's kind of helping me wake up though because all I want to do now is grab my phone and tell her to shut the hell up. Why would I want to listen to her screeching/singing when I'm sick? What made her think this was a good idea in the first place?

Actually, now that I think about, I don't really feel so sick anymore. Granted that I still have a raging headache but that's probably from Sugar's attempt to wake me. I'm not feeling chills anymore and my nose isn't drowning in itself. This is good, at least I can still make myself look presentable now.

"Santana Lopez! Are you ignoring me!? Oh my god you are!" I look towards the voice echoing in my room and see the figure of a small woman standing at my doorway. She walks up to my bed and uncovers my phone from beneath my pillow. "I was asking you if you could open the door for me. I go out of my way to bring you home you're favorite soup and you don't even open the door!" She holds up the take out containers in her hands. "Now come on, get up. You need to eat or you'll die and I'll need to find a new roommate." She pokes my shoulder before walking out.

"I hate that soup! You're the only one that eats it when we order it!" I yell back to her. After a few minutes of silence she hesitantly steps back into my room and eyes me up and down, a confused look on her face. "What?" I ask with a pointed look.

"Either you were in the kitchen for the first time in your life, or some random stranger came into our house and made themselves something to eat…" she says. "I'm really hoping it's the second one because you would probably make something that would end up killing yourself, and they left like a whole lot of groceries in our refrigerator." I almost feel tempted to throw something at her for that insult but stop myself and smile.

"If you must know, Brittany came by and made me the most amazing soup to help me get better." I tell her while sitting up and I begin to fix my hair. I look over at Sugar and I can tell that she's trying to hold back the biggest smile. Her mouth moves to pout before speaking again.

"Well then, maybe she should've put it away instead of just leaving it out all day. Now I can't have any."

"Well I wouldn't let you eat some anyways." I argue back. I give her a smirk to let her know I'm just fooling around. "Come, sit." I pat the very edge of my bed and she completely ignores where I motioned to and sits right next to me. I roll my eyes and scoot over to give her some space. "I'll tell you what happened. Also, Quinn says 'Hi', Rachel too but I told her I wouldn't pass that down for her since I'm not her fucking messenger." Sugar stifles a laugh and nudges my side. "Hey! At least I _did_tell you. She should be happy."

"Santana come on. Stop getting distracted! Tell me what happened!"

So I tell her what happened. But I leave out the parts where I totally freaked out and a second later I was insecure and asked her to stay. I just tell her about the phone call and how it made me worry and think that something was definitely wrong.

"So she's taken? Because that's what it sounds like Santana. Maybe this isn't such a good idea. Remember what happened in high school? I don't want you to get hurt again." Sugar's body is turned to me now, completely pulled in.

"No, it's completely different than high school. If you would just let me finish you'd understand. After she fell asleep, I was still pretty confused. That's when Quinn called me on Skype." I look at Sugar again and she's nodding, urging me to continue.

* * *

_"Santana? Can you hear me? I can see you but I can't tell if you actually look like shit or if that's because of the bad quality."_

_"Shut the fuck up Quinn, I can hear you, ass." I roll my eyes when her face finally appears on my screen._

_"Well it's nice to know you're still the same. I was afraid being away from me for too long would make you soft, no one to bicker with and all."_

_"Puh-lease. You forget that I live with Sugar Motta. Sugar, fucking, Motta. Snix comes out on a daily basis here. And what about you! I'm sure your skills are getting even better living with Rachel Berry! The things I could come up with everyday! Oh man, I'm starting to get jealous!" I start laughing loudly and not long after I start to cough and wheeze for air. Damn being sick, I can't even enjoy making fun of 'Man Hands'._

_"Nice to see you too Santana, glad to know I'm missed." I look at my screen and see Rachel with an unamused look. Behind her, Quinn is covering her mouth trying not to laugh._

_"Shut up dwarf." I throw back at her. Like hell I miss her. I just miss making fun of her._

_"Hey! Did you meet Dog the Bounty Hunter yet?" she practically screams._

_My face sharpens as I just stare blankly back at her. Apparently the show has been her new obsession. Why is that always a question people ask me when they find out I'm living in Hawaii? Do they just assume everyone knows each other?_

_"Santana? Did we lose you?" she tries again, waving her hand in front of the camera. I hold my stare._

_"S?" Quinn speaks now, worried that our connection was cut._

_"Hm?" I say and look at Quinn._

_"Did we lose you for a bit? Rachel asked you a question." She asks._

_"Oh I know. I thought that if I ignored her stupidity for long enough she might just disappear." I deadpan. Rachel looks taken back at first but then just rolls her eyes._

_"Where the hell are you? It looks like something blew up behind you!" Quinn says as she leans into the screen to get a better view. I look around at my surroundings and shrug. I had walked my laptop into the kitchen so as not to disturb Brittany from sleeping. Now that I think about it, my bedroom would have been a safer choice._

_"Oh my god do you have company? I see dishes! I see two pairs of dishes!" Rachel's hand points at her screen as she speaks._

_"Rach, it's probably Sugar's. Stop freaking out." Quinn tries to calm her._

_"Why would Sugar be eating what seems to be soup at home with Santana if she's the one that called us to make sure she was okay? Really Quinn, sometimes I wonder about your intellect." Rachel turns to her now, in their own conversation, completely ignoring me._

_"You know what Rachel? I don't know why I thought that leaving Yale for NYU was ever a good idea. I should've just left you to suffer from that roommate you had your first year." Quinn snaps back at her._

_"UGH! You know that girl was crazy Quinn! How could you say that?" Rachel crosses her arms over her chest._

_"Oh I knoooow she was crazy Rachel! She was oh so crazy, for you." Quinn smirks back. Rachel's mouth drops open and I try my hardest not to laugh out loud. I missed this so much._

_"Is that why you moved to NYU? Jealous?" Rachel changes her expression to a smirk. I could tell Quinn wasn't expecting her to say that. I wasn't expecting it either to be honest. I guess New York mixed with Quinn was making Rachel a little more confident. Quinn tries to recover but she keeps opening and closing her mouth, not knowing what to say back. I see Rachel's face change, but I can't put my finger on what this look is saying. I watch as they just stare at each other. What the fuck is happening?_

_"Ahem!" I try to get their attention, it works and they both look startled and I can see them blushing. "Now that you're done making out, can we get back to discussing what's important?"_

_"Alright, tell us everything. Who is she?" Quinn says as she sits up straighter now._

_"Her name is Brittany," I say with a smile. "She's sleeping in the living room right now actually, she came over to make me soup." I look towards the doorway leading to the living room and my smile turns into a frown._

_"Okay so what's wrong with her?" Rachel picks up on my expression._

_"I think, she's taken. Which confuses me, like a lot." I tell them. They look at me with questioning looks and I continue. "Okay so we've been flirting back and forth for like a week now and I know she likes me, she hasn't actually said so but I know it. It's not like subtle flirting either. I met her friends earlier and it just seemed so perfect. And then today out of nowhere she gets this phone call and it gets weird. She starts lying about where she is and the way she was talking, it sounded like they were together."_

_"Well what if it was her best friend? People act like that to their friends all the time." Rachel states._

_"I thought that too at first but then why would she have to lie about being in school? She just stood there and lied and I could tell she was trying to cover something up. It was like she didn't want them to know she was here."_

_"Wait, this just happened? Like a couple of hours ago?" Quinn asks with one of her eyebrows quirked up. I nod slowly. "Why is she still there? How did you not already kick her out?"_

_"I asked her to stay. She was about to leave and the next thing I know I'm asking her to stay…"_

_"Santana…" She starts again._

_"Say what you want Quinn but I'm not gonna just kick her out. I can't just jump to conclusions and get all mad at her. Now THAT'S what you call crazy. When I asked her what it was about she looked so sad." My mind flashes back to the memory._

'You don't know anything about me…'

_I don't think she meant to say it out loud. I don't even think she knew she said it in the first place. I would've kicked her out but after she said that I couldn't bring myself to do it._

_"Well how do you plan on finding out the truth? If this turns out the same as-"_

_"It won't. I'm gonna find out. I'll ask her straight up what's going on." I look to my side and see Brittany's phone at the other side of the table, teasing me._

_"Well if you ask me, I think you should-" Rachel tries to add to the conversation but I'm too quick to stop her._

_"No one is asking you dwarf."_

_"Santana be nice, she's just trying to help." Quinn offers._

_"Whatever. Sorry Rachel, it's just that every time I hear your voice, my mind just tells me to attack. I can't help it sometimes." I say with a shrug. She rolls her eyes. I look at Brittany's phone again and stare at it for a while before reaching to grab it. I play with it in my hands._

_"What's that?" Rachel asks._

_"Brittany's cell phone…" I say as I look up at my friends._

_"Santana, I know what you're thinking, don't do it. Just ask her when she wakes up." Quinn tries to reason._

_"But if I just look now, I'll know for sure. She could always lie if I asked her face to face." I look at them and their faces are begging me to stop. "I need to know guys. I can't risk it again. I just can't." I swipe my finger across Brittany's phone and her home screen brightens up in my palm._

_"Maybe you should wait till Sugar gets home? If worse comes to worse I think someone should be there just in case." Rachel speaks up again. I roll my eyes at her remark._

_"I'm not gonna go and kill myself over this, you idiot. We barely know each other. It's better if I found out now."_

_"I don't mean be there for YOU. Someone should be there to make sure you don't hurt HER."_

_"I'm not gonna hurt her. Seriously, do you think that lowly of me?"_

_"Stop stalling and look at her call log! I wanna know!" Quinn blurts out before blushing. "Sorry, I know I won't be able to stop you so now I'm just really curious. The suspense is killing me."_

_"If it says 'lover' or 'sweetie' or 'honey' then I might throw up." I tell them before pressing my finger to the small screen. I stare blankly at the screen. I glance at Quinn and Rachel, their eyes begging me to tell them what it says._

_"Mama." I finally say. "It says 'Mama'. Guys! It's not a girlfriend! It was her fucking mom on the phone!" Relief fills my chest._

_"Oh my god." Rachel says softly._

_"Wait, if it was her mom and she lied, does that mean she's in the closet?" Quinn asks. Leave it to her to ruin a good moment. I sink in my seat._

_"I'll take that over being in a relationship any day. Don't bring me down Quinn, this is good!"_

_"You're right. This is good. At least we know history won't repeat itself."_

* * *

"Is that it?" Sugar sits back again.

"Yep." I tell her.

"So she's in the closet?"

"I guess."

"How do you feel?"

"Better actually. That soup she made me does miracles."

"Not about that you dummy. How do you feel about her being in the closet?"

"I don't know yet. But it's better than the alternative right?

"I hope so."

* * *

_When I finally convince Quinn and Rachel that I'll be okay, we say our goodbyes before hanging up our call and I sit back in my seat. I look around and contemplate whether or not I want to clean up a bit. As amazing as the soup was, it's been out for too long by now. Plus I'm sick so I shouldn't be cleaning anyways. Good, at least I have an excuse not to clean. That way Sugar won't go all bat shit crazy on me._

_I stand up and make my way back into the living room. When I pass the threshold I'm greeted with a still sleeping Brittany. She looked so tired, leaning against the armrest with the rest of her body nearly spread across the couch. I grab my blanket on the recliner and quickly run to my room to throw it on my bed._

_I walk back to where Brittany was sleeping and mentally try to map out the best way to sleep by her without waking her up. I slowly sit down and tuck my feet to my side, opposite her. I look to her again. Fuck it. I grab her arm and wrap it around my shoulders. I lean down and nestle my head on her chest. I can hear her heartbeat now, soft and rhythmic. I close my eyes and I suddenly feel her arm tighten around me. It feels comfortable laying here with her._

_I fall asleep almost instantly, lost in her scent and heartbeat._

* * *

_Beeeeeeeeep!_

I release my palm from my steering wheel. I can see that I startled her from the way her hand is grabbing at her chest. I drive closer and roll the passenger side window down.

"Santana?" she says as she looks in.

"You never called me yesterday." I tell her.

"Yea, I'm sorry about that. I was really busy yesterday. Can I make it up to you?" She says with a hopeful smile on her face.

"I'll hold you to that." I grin back. Her face brightens up and it makes me smile at her adorableness. She steps back and eyes my car up and down.

"Are you driving to school today?" she asks. My smile is still present as I nod. "Oh. Okay." She says in a softer tone. I almost let out a laugh but manage to hold it in.

"Would you like a ride Ms. Pierce?" I ask with a British accent while reaching over and pushing the passenger door open. She steps back so the door can open. One hand is covering her mouth as she laughs.

"Why thank you, I would" she says as she curtsies before stepping in. I shake my head and laugh.

"You're such a dork."

"Why me? You're the one that started it!" she argues back.

I watch her as she struggles with the seatbelt. When she finally gets settled she turns to me and smiles. I smile back and hand her an IPod cord. She grabs it from me and eyes it with a confused look.

"What's this for?" She looks up as she asks. I smirk as I lean back into my seat and put the car in drive.

"You're Ipod." I tell her as I pull away from the curb.

"My Ipod?" She asks, this time following the cord till she realizes that it's connected to my radio. "You wanna listen to _my _music?"

"Yep, we listened to mine last week so it's only fitting to listen to yours."

She stares at me with a blank expression for a minute or two. I quirk one of my eyebrows up.

"Do you _have _an IPod Brittany?" I finally question. She shakes her head no.

"I never really got around to getting one."

"Oh. Wow, okay then. You can just pick the music again." Without moving my eyes from the road I reach to my side and grab my IPod out from the middle console. From the corner of my eye, I see her jump in her seat out of excitement. When she moves to grab it from my hands I pull it away and look at her. "No Glee Club this time, I mean it." I say as a warning. The side of her mouth quirks up for a second before mouthing 'Okay'.

* * *

"So who is singing now?" Brittany asks.

"Seriously? Her voice just screams annoying every time she opens her mouth. How can you not tell by now?" I roll my eyes.

We've been driving for about half an hour now and just hit traffic. I should've known that Brittany wouldn't listen to me when I told her not to play my Glee Club songs. First thing she did after grabbing my IPod was to go straight for that playlist.

"You know, all you had to say was 'Rachel'. Stop pretending you don't like her." She says as she pokes me in the cheek. I scoff at that, shooing her hand away.

"I DO NOT like her." I look at Brittany, "She annoys me."

"Mhm, every time one of her songs start to play you kind of smile." She tilts her head, "Why is that?" an eyebrow quirked up.

"What?" I can feel my cheeks getting hot, "I... I don't smile."

"You really do." She says with a giggle. "I'm not gonna lie, its kinda cute."

I sink into my seat and turn my attention back to the road. "She just helped me out once. But it doesn't mean she's my friend because of it. She's still annoying."

* * *

_I bury my face into my knees. Crying sucks. This sucks. How the fuck did I get myself in this position? I'm the baddest bitch in this school; I should be the one breaking hearts. Not the other way around._

_It feels like someone just punched me in the gut. I try to take deep breaths to calm my emotions but it doesn't help because I start crying harder. I'm gripping the chair under me so tightly that my knuckles are white. I shake my head deeper into my knees._

_Sitting here in this chair, in this room, in this school, is making me sick. I hate this. I hate everything about this goddamn club. I didn't sign up for this shit. I never would've broken down my walls and let her in if it wasn't for this stupid club._

_Knock Knock_

_"Santana?" Rachel asks, her head peeking into the choir room._

_"Get out dwarf! Can't you see I'm busy!" I jump to my feet and turn around quickly to hide the fact that I'm bawling my eyes out. I can hear her walking towards me now. "I'm serious Rachel, get out."_

_"Santana," she tries again. I hear her pull a chair closer to me and she sits._

_"Get out Rachel..." my voice falters._

_"Santana, I'm not gonna leave." she tells me softly. I slowly sit down again, still facing away from her. There's a long pause before my voice barely makes its way to the surface._

_"She just laughed at me and walked out." I tell her under my breath. Rachel doesn't speak. "How could I be so stupid? I should've known it all meant nothing... She thinks I'm a joke."_

_"Then she must be the stupidest girl in the world." Rachel hesitantly says._

_I turn around slowly and my eyes meet hers. Her expression is so easily readable; unsure and scared. I'm pretty sure she's expecting me to lash out at her and start yelling in Spanish. Her face softens after she realizes that I'm not going to attack._

_"You're gonna survive this Santana. You're going to move on and you'll fall in love."_

_"I don't want to fall in love if it's gonna hurt this much. She rejected me. She doesn't feel the same." My eyes flutter down to my lap, tears threatening to fall again._

_"So what if the love of your life isn't her. One day, you'll meet someone so amazing. And you'll remember back on this moment and feel so much relief that you didn't let this keep you from being truly happy." She stands up now, "I have an idea. I just thought of the perfect song."_

_"Oh HELL NO Berry. I do not feel like being serenaded by you right now. You're already pushing it by just standing there in that horrible outfit." My crying has stopped now. I'll never admit it but that little pep talk really did make me feel better._

_"I wasn't planning on singing it right now. I have to find Artie." She says as she walks towards the door. She turns around one last time before exiting and says, "You're going to be fine Santana. You'll find her one day and you're going to be just fine."_

* * *

"Oh my god we're so late!" Brittany almost yells as we rush through the parking lot of UH.

"I'm so sorry Brittany! I was trying to do something nice and drive you to school."

"It's okay," she laughs, "we couldn't have known you'd get a flat tire. Besides, it _was _pretty hilarious watching you try and change it. Almost makes it worth being late."

"Don't even start with me okay. Miss, 'I don't know how to change a tire but hey, let's laugh and take funny pictures as Santana actually tries.' How do you not know how to change a tire? That's like important shit to know right?"

"I guess, but I hardly drive and if anything I can always get one of the guys to help me out. _But_ I think from now on I might just call _you _up." I can hear the smirk in her voice.

"You might be like the meanest person on the planet."

"Hey! It's not my fault you're like really sexy changing a tire."

She said it so fast and out of breath that I almost missed it. I have to slow down my footsteps to let my brain mentally catch up with her words. Did she just call me sexy?

"Yes, I just called you sexy." Her voice brings me back. She's a bit more in front of me now. "But only when you're changing tires." She winks before turning back around. "If you walk at that pace, you're gonna get there next year!" she yells without turning around. I shake my head to clear my thoughts and jog back into step with Brittany.

"I change my mind. You ARE the meanest person on the planet."

When we make it to our class we are officially thirty minutes late. I grab the door knob and open the door with ease. It's dark inside and it seems that we walked in during a presentation.

"Well this seems familiar…" I mutter under my breath. I hear Brittany stifle a laugh and she nudges me in the arm. We've been standing there for way too long now and our professor seems to be getting more and more irritated.

"Ladies! Glad you could join us. Hurry and take your seats so that we can continue with presentations for the day." Our professor finally speaks. I feel like it's even more embarrassing now that we've totally been called out in front of our entire class.

I quickly scan the rows of seats and I frown when I find that there are no open seats that are even remotely close to each other. Brittany hands meet my back as she guides me towards an open seat. I soon realize what seat she wanted me to sit in and move on my own will to it. She drops her hands and walks past me to the other side of the class to take her seat.

From our seat positions we have an unobstructed view looking directly at each other. I'm really starting to love this half-circle seating thing. My eyes don't leave Brittany's when she mouths 'Hi' to me from across the room. I giggle and mouth my own hi back.

'How are you?' she continues. I smile back widely and shake my head at her.

'Stop it. You're going to get me in trouble!'

'Me? I would never' she smirks back.

'Lies.' I mouth with an eyebrow up.

'Maybe we should text? The guy in front of you is giving me strange looks' she looks at him and he chokes on his breath. He's most likely been reading her lips the entire time. I roll my eyes and kick the back of his chair, making a louder noise than I expected. Everyone turns toward him.

"Is everything okay over there?" I hear our professor ask. The boy in front of me clears his throat before straightening himself in the seat. He glances around, probably embarrassed.

"Uh, yea. Sorry, continue." He says. I roll my eyes and look back at Brittany, trying to hold in the biggest laugh.

'You're mean' she mouths at me.

'He shouldn't be staring.' I mouth back with a shrug.

'What about me?' Brittany asks back. My cheeks flush red as I try to act cool. Her smile widens and I'm positive that she knows that she's made me flustered.

I giggle to myself as I try to focus back on the lecture. Every so often I can feel Brittany's eyes on me and I look up just in time to see her looking away. Vice versa too. A few times though we both look up at the same time and hold our stares.

'I'm tired.' I tell her. She glances at the clock on her phone.

'There's only ten more minutes of class.'

'I feel like I'm DYING' I emphasize more dramatically when I mouth the word dying. She covers her mouth with her hand to hide her laughing.

'I'm sure you'll be fine.' She mouths back.

I smile back at her. I am fine, I'm more than fine actually.

* * *

_"Santana!" Rachel calls from the end of the hall. I roll my eyes before turning around. I was so close to walking out of this damn school and going home, when man hands yentl has to go and scream my name._

_"What?" I ask while walking closer. "God Rachel, I know you've worn this sad excuse for a sweater all day but my eyes have to seriously readjust to looking at ugly every time I see it."_

_"You don't have to be like that. No one is around, you can go back to being the nice Santana that I know is in there." She says, taking a few steps back. I sigh and throw my hands in the air._

_"Okay I'm sorry. Look, I had a pretty shitty day. You should know this already, you saw me earlier. Can you get to the point though because I got me a tub o' ice cream and Sweet Valley High reruns to get to." She nods and slowly comes closer again. "QUICKLY." I snap my fingers._

_"Here." She hands me a small thumb drive. "Artie helped me with it earlier today. It's just something for you to listen to whenever you're feeling down." I look at her with a questioning look. "So that you don't give up on finding her. Because you will." And with that she turns and walks away._

_I listen to that song on repeat all night._

* * *

"So national champ, would you like the tuna or ham?" Brittany asks me as she eyes the sandwiches through the glass. "I'm thinking tuna today."

"Definitely tuna." I step beside her and point at the side with tuna sandwiches. She nods and grabs two of them. The nickname she used suddenly registers and it makes me wonder. "So you never told me why you were in Chicago for the competition. Did you know one of the performers?"

"Yea, something like that. Soda or juice?" She asks when we reach the drinks.

"Water." I counter and grab a bottled water from the refrigerator. "How did you like it?"

"The performances? They were awesome! You guys were really great. Was it scary going first? I know that's like the worst position to be in." We walk up to the line of students waiting to pay for their meals.

"Yea it was, but we did alright I guess."

"Alright? You guys won. I think that's a little better than just alright." She walks up to the cashier and points at me. "Her's too."

"What? No its okay. I can buy my own lunch Britt." I try to argue.

"You drove me to school today. It's the least I can do."

"But I made you late! That's hardly a good deed in my book..."

"It's the thought that counts." She reasons back.

"So then maybe you should just _think _about buying me food?" I try again.

"Or I could just buy this for you now, and then make you wait thirty minutes to eat it?" She offers.

I study her face for any signs of a smile and quickly realize that she was being serious. I never knew this level of innocence even existed until I met her.

"Fine, you win." I finally give in and she brightens.

"So... together then?" the cashier finally asks. I nod and Brittany laughs.

"Walk me to class?" Brittany asks me once we get out of the cafeteria.

"Sure."

We start walking slowly to her building and the back of our hands brush against each other a few times. After a couple more times she finally sticks her pinky out and links it with mine. At first I was shocked at the simple gesture but the heavy beating in my chest is telling me that it's not just shock.

* * *

_It's been about a month since the commercial first aired. The commercial that outed me as a lesbian to pretty much everyone in Ohio. Things have settled down and the staring finally stopped. I really do have the most amazing friends in the world. They've been sticking behind me and making sure I'm okay every day. Things are finally starting to look up._

_"Hey you." I turn around to the familiar voice and smile._

_"Good morning" I tell her with a hug before beginning our usual routine as we open our lockers at the same time and grab our books for first period. "Walk me to class?" I ask her._

_"Always." she smiles. We fall into step side by side and I reach to link my pinky in hers. She pulls back like she always does._

_"Why do you hate that so much?" I ask._

_"Because your hands sweat. I don't like it." she says._

_"Tay it's just my pinky. My pinky doesn't sweat."_

_"Whatever. It just feels dumb okay? It's uncomfortable." she glances around slowly._

_"Fine. I just thought that it would be okay now since everything that's happening this month." she stops walking and turns to me._

_"I'm sorry Sanny." I cringe at the nickname. "I know you're struggling with this whole gay thing. I'll try to be more supportive okay. I just don't like the whole pinky thing. It makes no sense."_

_"Yea. I understand. Thanks for walking me to class though." I pause before opening the door and look at her again. "Listen, I was wondering if you could meet me in the choir room during lunch. I wanna give you something."_

_She smiles sweetly at me and brushes some of my hair behind my ear. "Sure babe. See you later." She looks around shyly and leans in to kiss me on the lips before turning and making her way to her own class on the other side of the school. I sigh as I watch her until she's out of sight. This is it, I think to myself. I think I've finally found you._

* * *

_"I don't understand." my throat tightens and I can hardly breathe._

_"It's simple Santana. I don't love you." she replied harshly. "I'm sorry if this actually hurts but what did you expect? I'm not gay."_

_"What are you saying Taylor? That this whole time we've been together you've just been leading me on? Why would you do that!"_

_"You're the one who had to make it into something else! If you remember correctly Santana, this whole thing started as just fun. Sex isn't dating. I never wanted any of this relationship shit."_

_"So why do it? Why let me make a fool of myself? We're best friends Taylor."_

_"Really Santana? Just because we've been best friends for as long as we could remember doesn't mean we're destined to be together or something. Besides, I'm with Brandon. We've actually been seeing each other for a while now."_

_"Wha-? You're seeing him? You've been cheating on me?" My stomach drops and she laughs._

_"CHEATING? It's only cheating if this was actually something and it's not. I love him."_

_"He's just a stupid boy! I love you Taylor, and I know you love me too! Please say you love me back, please. Why are you so ashamed to admit it?"_

_"Why can't you just let this go? THIS. MEANT. NOTHING."_

_She said it with such forcefulness in her voice that I had to take a step back. The back of my knees hit the chair behind me and my legs almost gave out. I want to scream._

_"This was all just one big joke for you. I can't believe this is happening right now." I say softly._

_She laughs again but she might as well have just shot me in the fucking face._

_"Look, it was fun while it lasted. I never thought you'd actually fall in love with me. Seriously Santana, get over it. You're going to wake up tomorrow morning and realize just how stupid you're sounding right now. You're not gay. I can't believe you actually called me in here to tell me you loved me THROUGH SONG. This whole Glee Club thing is really getting to you. God, you're so lame. Maybe you are a lesbian!" she laughs again and I clench my jaw at the sound._

_"Look I'll see you around. Call me when you finally realize that those Lima loser friends aren't worth your reputation. It's your senior year, you can still save yourself. Get out of this shit and find yourself some eye candy. You'll thank me later for it."_

_She walks out and I fall into the seat behind me. I lift my legs to my chest and hug them tightly. I can't breathe. Suddenly there's a knock at the door and I quickly stand up._

_"Santana?"_

_"Get out dwarf! Can't you see I'm busy!"_

* * *

Thinking back to that moment, it feels like it was so long ago. It was just two years and I feel like I've grown so much more. Even from the time of being at my lowest to graduating high school alongside some of the most amazing people in the world, I think I've grown the most. My senior year changed my life. Glee Club changed my life, and I'll be forever grateful to them for that.

"I met you back in Chicago you know." Brittany breaks the silence. I almost forgot we were walking. She squeezes my pinky tighter, "It was really brief. I stopped by your club's dressing room to congratulate you guys."

"Seriously? How do I not remember that…" How could I have met her before? I would've remembered.

"It's ok," she laughs, "It was pretty hectic backstage, and you guys were going crazy."

"Did we talk?" I ask.

"Mmm not really. You opened the door when I knocked. You kinda stared at me for a little bit but then your friend pulled you away. After that I walked in and talked to Mr. Shue for a bit."

"Wow. I officially hate whoever it was that pulled me away."

"Well we probably wouldn't have talked long." she tries.

I look down at our linking pinkies. The way she initiated it so carelessly, like it was the most comfortable thing to do. Like we do it on a daily basis. It made me want to do this forever. I look up at Brittany and she's already returning the smile I'm giving her.

"Santana?" I shift my focus to the intruding voice and find Devin walking towards us. I give him an awkward wave and he returns it just as awkwardly.

"Hey what are you doing here?" He asks when he gets close enough. He looks at Brittany with a knowing look and then down to our hands. "Walking Britt to class?" he answers his own question.

"What are _you _doing here?" Brittany asks. I look at her and she's smirking. I feel like I'm missing an inside joke.

"Shut up. I just happened to be walking by." He replies and shoves both of his hands into his pockets.

"Mhmm." She turns to me, "Joel's class lets out right about now. Somehow Devin here seems to make sure he's 'walking by' at the right moment." I giggle and make an O shape with my mouth.

"It's not my fault that I have to walk past here to get to my next class!" he tries to reason again.

"You mean that same class that doesn't start for another hour?" She responds quickly. He tries to argue but doesn't seem to know what to say to that. I look at Brittany again, a satisfied look spread across her face. I lean in to whisper in her ear.

"Remember when I was saying you're probably the meanest person on the planet?" She giggles and shakes her head.

"Hey guys!" I turn around and see Joel walking up from one of the classes. I step closer to Brittany to make room in our makeshift circle for him. He takes the hint and steps into the gap.

"Hey Devin" he greets separately, "So shall we?" he asks him. From the looks of it, they seem to usually do this between classes.

"Sure." He smiles back. Brittany and I watch them with adoring looks. She looks at her phone before turning to me.

"Alright well I've got class now so I'll see you later?" she asks. I frown and give her a small nod.

"Hey why don't you come with us?" Joel turns and asks me. "We're just gonna hang out for an hour or so." Joel adds. I look at Devin and I can tell he was hoping to have spent that time alone with Joel.

"Oh no, it's ok. I don't wanna ruin anything you might've planned." I tell him. I really don't need one of Brittany's friends hating me right now.

"No it's totally cool! Devin and I hang out all the time! Plus it'd be nice to pick your brain. We could do some recon." he adds while giving a very unsubtle wink to Brittany.

"Oh wow. Okay, now I think I'm just too scared to go now." I try again.

"Nonsense! Let's go!" he finalizes and before I know it, he snakes his arm between mine and pulls me away fast. I try to look back at Brittany to save me but she just laughs and gives me a shrug.

Devin jogs to catch up to us and I can tell he's a little upset by the stiff way he's walking next to me. I look at him and he gives me a forced smile. I give the same back and mouth a quick 'I'm so sorry'. He blushes and shakes his head and whispers, "It's okay. You tried."

* * *

"Ok first things first," Joel says while sitting down. We ended up just going to a coffee shop on campus. "We all know you and Britt have this thing going on." Devin nods in agreement while drinking his iced milk tea. I can't believe how fast Joel and Devin change their attitudes once we are alone. My face is probably screaming scared right now, because honestly, being interrogated does bad things to me and I need these people to like me.

"Believe me when I say that it's the cutest thing in the world, however, we need to make sure of some things..." Joel tells me. My eyes widen at his words and the way his eyes are studying my entire face is seriously freaking me out.

"Jesus Joel, don't scare the poor girl." Devin speaks up and gives Joel a pointed look. He turns to me, "We heard that there was a little bit of a _problem _the other day."

"Well if you put it that way it sounds worse!" Joel interrupts. "I'll just say it already. Brittany doesn't do this a lot."

She doesn't do what a lot? Flirt? Date? Well that makes two of us.

"For the past two years, she's never really found an interest in someone, especially so fast," Joel adds, "and if she does then she usually just shuts it out and ignores it. Brittany is our best friend, she's had a lot happen to her and I won't let anything else happen either."

"So you see, we just need to make sure." Devin adds.

I look between the both of them and I can tell that they both genuinely care for Brittany. To have friends who support you like that, it's the best thing in the world. Brittany is lucky to have found people like them.

"I won't." I finally speak. "I won't hurt her. This, thing, whatever it is, I really like it. I know you barely know me so I won't ask you to trust me when I say that I'm not the type of girl to play games." I look down at the cup of coffee between my hands.

I'm pretty sure I've thought of Taylor more times today than I have for the past year.

"I would never do that."

* * *

_I drop my bag to the floor and fall face first on my bed. I want to scream and cry and punch something all at once. Worst. Day. Ever. Fucking heart, why do you have to feel so broken right now? Why did you allow me to open you up to someone as fucked up as Taylor? TAYLOR. I should've known._

_I turn onto my back and look to my side at my school bag. Maybe I should listen to the song Rachel recorded for me. She did say it would help... and I really need help right now._

_I reach for the strap of my bag and pull it onto the bed. I close my eyes and mentally map out my bag as I feel for the front pocket zipper. When I get it open I reach in and grab the gold starred thumb drive._

_I move to my laptop and open it. TAYLOR. Now I have to resist the urge to thrust kick the screen as I build up the strength to change my background image._

_A piano melody cuts through the silence in my room suddenly and I realize that my iTunes started to play the song from the thumb drive. When did I plug that in?_

_Whether it's the sunshine_

_Whether it's the rain_

_Doesn't make a difference_

_Till you complain_

_Whether it's the water comin' in from the roof_

_Does it piss you off_

_That you're not waterproof?_

_Whether you fall_

_Means nothing at all_

_It's whether you get up_

_It's whether you get up_

_And you hate the silence_

_As it fills up the room_

_And there's not much to say_

_To your blushing groom_

_Maybe all eyes are on you_

_As you finish the race_

_And the world sees you struggling_

_For last place_

_Whether you fall_

_Means nothing at all_

_It's whether you get up_

_It's whether you get up_

_Whether you fall_

_Means nothing at all_

_Whether you get up_

_Whether you get up_

_When I wake up the next morning "Whether You Fall" is the most played track on my iTunes. Little did I know, two years from now, it still will be._

* * *

"So what class do you have now?" Devin asks me as he stands and starts ridding the table of his cup and napkins. I stand too and help him.

"Um I've got Psy240 with Professor Frazier." I tell him and he pauses his movements.

"What?" I ask him.

"I'm in your class…" he tells me.

"What?" I ask again and he nods. "Wait seriously? How come I've never seen you?"

"I've been skipping." He blushes and looks in the direction Joel left for work. "Joel usually doesn't work the same time as my class. So I've been skipping it to spend more time with him." He explains with his head down.

"Wow."

"I know."

"That's kind of sad..."

"I know."

"Well lucky for you I actually took notes in that class." I tell him and he looks at me.

"Thanks." he smiles. "You know, I actually kinda like you." he adds.

"Thank you?" I say in an unsure tone. We begin to make our way to class together.

"It's a good thing," he laughs, "I don't really like people very often."

"It's not just because I'm letting you use my notes?" I joke back.

"Yea maybe." he deadpans. I look at him and he laughs again, "No really, you're actually pretty cool. Plus I haven't seen Britt this happy in a while. It's good for her."

"Well, she does the same for me. Even though it's still new and I don't really know where it's going yet."

"Oh yeah, don't worry about us telling her about our little talk with Joel. We just needed to know for ourselves." he laughs to himself and shakes his head, "Actually if we told her about it she would probably be really mad at us."

"It's okay. I understand completely where you guys are coming from." I stare at the ground, "Can I confess something though?" he turns to me and studies my face.

"Sure."

"I kind of wanted to take things as slow as possible." I pause to smile, "She's making it really hard though." He nods at that. "I just don't want to get hurt…" We stop in front of our class and he turns to face me completely now.

"She really likes you Santana. If she didn't, you wouldn't have even been invited to that study group. When we told you that night that it doesn't happen often, what we meant was EVER. It's never happened"

"I just don't know anything about her."

"Then get to know her. Ask her out on a date. There's so much of Brittany to learn. I'm just happy that she found an interest in you. God knows she needs a break from life right now." I look at him with questioning eyes. "Just get to know her." He looks around, "It might take some time for her to open up to you. Just promise me you'll be patient with her? She has her reasons to be guarded." It was my turn to study his face now. If anything, this whole conversation is making me want to know her even more.

"Is it weird that you are like oddly good at giving advice? The very one that can't ask a certain someone out." I smirk at him.

"Hey! Shouldn't you be trying to win brownie points here?"

"Yeah well, I could always just blackmail you with my endless amounts of notes on days that you're out playing hooky with lover boy."

His mouth drops open and he lets out a gasp. I have to hold my breath to keep myself from laughing as I try to keep my smirk intact. His mouth closes and his eyes purse.

"You guys might just be made for each other."

We walk into class together laughing. We find seats next to each other somewhere in the back of the room and class begins.

_Made for each other. _I hope so. Did I finally find her?

No. I stop myself from thinking further. I won't open myself up to that again.

Not yet.

* * *

**AN: Soooooo I tried to finish this chapter as fast as I could but the whole Break-Up episode kinda fucked me up. SO I decided to write a break up that didn't involve sad Brittany. Because sad Brittany makes me really sad and I don't want to be sad. SAD.**

**REVIEW! Thanks guys :D**


	5. Damn Wednesdays

**AN: This chapter is 100% Brittany and Santana, 100% fluff. Hope you like :)**

**Just in case this chapter only makes sense in my head and not in yours, the first Wednesday is three weeks after the last chapter. The next three Wednesdays are flashbacks, and then it goes back to present day (February 12, 2014).**

**Brittany POV**

* * *

Chapter 5: Damn Wednesdays

**Wednesday, February 12, 2014**

Today is Wednesday.

It's the first thought in my head when I wake up. I smile because I've come to love Wednesdays. It's become sort of a thing the past couple of weeks for Santana to drive us to school today and for me to buy her lunch.

It's something about Wednesdays that get me all worked up and giddy on the inside. I always seem to lose focus with whatever I'm doing and get lost in everything that is Santana.

My mind flashes to thoughts of long dark hair and I think back to the last three Wednesdays with a smile on my face.

* * *

**Wednesday, January 22, 2014**

_"Santana! You really don't need to honk your horn when you drive up. It's barely six in the morning and I'm the only one waiting here!" I tell her with my hand still clutching at the collar of my shirt. I've only been sitting at the bus stop for about five minutes when Santana pulled up._

_"But it's really fun to see how scared you get." she looks at me through the open window with a smirk. "Now hurry up and get in or we're gonna be late."_

_"You're driving me to school again?" I ask her. Last week she did the same but I thought that was just going to be a one-time-only thing._

_"Mhmm," she gives a firm nod, "come on before I change my mind." I can't help but stare at her lips the whole time she's talking. What? It's early and I get easily distracted. They move into a playful grin almost in slow motion and I bite down on my bottom lip as a reflex._

_Santana breaks my spell by waving her hand in front of me and I jump in and buckle up. I have to admit, I really liked last week's car ride with just the two of us. Even though Santana wasn't the calmest driver in the world, watching her try to contain herself when other drivers pissed her off was amusing. I always catch the way she would mumble under her breath when cars would cut in front of her. Or the way she would bite her bottom lip and give them her evil death stare. I think she was holding back to not scare me._

_"Music?" Santana asks and I look back at her. She motions to her IPod resting in her cup holder. I eye it and laugh._

_"You're really gonna let me choose again?" I ask her while reaching to grab it. She just shrugs. "You know I'm just gonna play your Glee Club songs."_

_"Yeah well I would totally pick but I'm pretty sure you're just going to change it anyways." she looks at me and winks. I have to look away to prevent her from seeing the obvious blush that made its way onto my checks. It doesn't work because I hear her giggle._

_"Note to self: Delete all Glee Club songs from IPod." she says as if she were talking to herself. I laugh at her and start to look for the playlist._

_"Well then I guess I just have to listen to as much of it right now as I possibly can." I turn to her with a smirk, "Let's start with Rachel's songs..." I tease and she looks back at me through pursed eyes._

_"You wouldn't." she questions. I look away and smile at the object in my hand, knowing that she's still staring at me._

_"Oh but I would." I say before clicking the first song on the playlist. 'Don't Rain On My Parade'_

_I see her sink into her seat and she groans loudly. It makes me laugh to see how much of an effect this Rachel character has on Santana. It's like Santana hates herself for actually liking her but won't dare admit it. My face softens when I see her mouth slightly moving with the words after a few lines. She's so stubborn it's cute._

_"Thanks." I say softly. It surprises her and she looks back at me briefly with a questioning look before averting her eyes back to the road._ _"For giving me a ride," I tell her, "you don't have to but you do anyways."_

_She doesn't respond, or even look back at me. She just nods softly and smiles at the road._

_The day ends with her arguing that she would feel better with dropping me off at home instead of my usual morning bus stop like I wanted. _

_"Don't worry about me Santana I'll be fine. It's easy for me to get to my house from the bus stop than it is to go by car. I take a lot of short cuts. I don't want you to have to find your way around only to just get lost trying to get home from there." I say trying my hardest to convince her._

_After more back and forth banter she finally gives in and agrees to drop me off at the bus stop._

* * *

**Wednesday, January 29, 2014**

_BEEEEEEEEEEP!_

_I get jumped from my thoughts again when I hear the familiar sound of Santana's car. Seriously, it feels like she's scaring me on purpose now._

_"You're doing that on purpose." I lean down to look through the passenger window with a pout and my hands on my hips. She laughs at me and shrugs._

_"Maybe." she leans over the middle console and winks. _

_I blush at her and bring my hand up to my face to try and hide it. I step back and eye her car down with an eyebrow raised._

_"Driving again?" I ask her._

_"Yep." she answers. I nod and wait for her to offer me a ride too. It would be the third Wednesday in a row now for her to drive me to school. After a few minutes I start to worry that she won't offer and begin to shift awkwardly on the sidewalk. She catches it and starts to laugh loudly._

_"Britt, you don't have to wait for me to ask if you want a ride." she tells me._

_"I didn't want to just assume and get in..." I say with my head down and my feet grazing the concrete. I hear her giggle and I look up to see her giving me a smile._

_"Would you like a ride Ms. Pierce?" she teases in the same way she did the first time. I roll my eyes and get into her car. After buckling up she pulls away from the curb._

_As soon as I'm comfortable I turn to my side and search for her IPod, ready to start the day listening to her voice. I steal a glance up at Santana and see a smug grin forming on her lips. I raise my eyebrow confused as to what she's thinking about but quickly shake the thought from my mind when I finally grab her IPod. I immediately search for my favorite playlist._

_I can feel Santana's eyes looking at me. I look back at her and throw her a curious look. Her grin, now a smirk, feels like it's teasing me. I ignore her and turn my attention back to the object in my hand. Then I realize what's got her smirking._

_"You deleted it!" I yell out loud and slap her arm playfully. She throws her head back and laughs._

_"Of course I deleted it! I can't listen to Frodo this early in the morning Britt, I just can't." _

_"I can't believe you." I say shaking my head. Still doubting, I search for the songs by artist name but with no such luck, I find nothing. I won't give up though, I know that there's no way Santana would actually delete her Glee Club songs. She loves them too much._

_Finally, I come across a playlist I don't remember seeing before. It was titled: Time of My Life. Curious, I click on it. HA! FOUND IT. I almost scream out loud in victory right then and there but instead I chance a look at the brunette sitting next to me. She looked so giddy thinking that she fooled me. Adorable. Maybe, I'll let her have this one._

_"Fine, I'll pick something else." I give in with a pout. She sees it and laughs._

_"Come on Britt don't pout." She says poking my side. It makes me laugh and she smiles, thankful that I'm not really that upset about it. "I just wanna listen to music that you like."_

_"I like listening to you..." I tell her. It's the truth. As much as I love listening to Rachel just to spite Santana, I love listening to Santana's voice more. It's raspy, and sexy, and amazing._

_"How about you pick a song you like, and I'll sing with you?" she offers. I brighten at that and she smiles back at me._

_We spend the rest of the ride to school singing along to Amy Winehouse, Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Adele, and Michael Jackson. We even rapped to a couple of Kanye West songs. Well I did most of the rapping, she usually sang the choruses. I purposely tried to pick songs that I knew Santana would sound amazing while singing. She eventually realized that she was usually the only one singing and I would just be watching her smiling._

_By the time we were parked in the almost empty parking structure of UH, we were singing at the top of our lungs to Britney Spears._

_Later that day..._

_"Come on Santana!" I yell back at her while I run up to her car. When I get to it I lean forward with my hands on my knees to rest. I look up to see how close Santana was but I find that I have to squint my eyes to actually see the small brunette. She had stopped running and was now leaning with one arm up against a pillar and the other grabbing at her chest, panting. I laughed at the sight before calling back at her again._

_"I WIN!" I yell in her direction and she stands straight immediately realizing that I caught her resting. She runs the rest of the way to her car and tries to hide any signs of weakness. It doesn't work though and I poke her in her side causing her to double over immediately and whine._

_"Don't be such a baby San," I laugh, "just admit defeat."_

_"No fair Britt," she manages to breathe out, "you started running when I was trying to drink the rest of my water." She stands up straight again, hands on her hips and trying to catch her breath. "I didn't even know we were racing, so I win by default." She grins._

_"What? Fine, I don't win. I'll play fair from now on." I look at her and give her my best pout. She shuts her eyes immediately and holds up her hand to shield herself._

_"Don't give me that pout Brittany, it won't work!"_

_"What pout?" I ask, and she peeks through one eye to look at me. When she realizes that my face hasn't changed she giggles and her face softens. She takes a step towards me and brings her hand up to my face. She waves her finger for effect and when her finger touches my lips I have to force back the biggest smile._

_"THAT POUT."_

_Before I know it, the feeling of her finger on my lips leaves just as fast as it was there. _

"_I know what you're doing, and it won't work."_ _She says as she walks past me and avoids making eye contact as she gets into her car. I let go of my pout in defeat and turn to get in her car._

_"Britney, Brittany?" she asks while handing me her IPod again. I giggle and take it from her._

_After a few minutes of trying to decide what I wanted to listen to I finally decide to just make Santana suffer. I click on a song and turn the volume up on her stereo. When the strength of Rachel's voice cuts through the speakers, Santana jerks her car and hits on her breaks momentarily causing both of us to jolt forward and back in a push and pull type of movement._

_"That's what you get for not letting me win." I tease when we finally recover._

_"Wha- How did you find it?" she asks and I shrug._

_"I knew you wouldn't let yourself delete them."_

* * *

**Wednesday, February 5, 2014**

_I make sure to get to my bus stop extra early today to hide behind a couple of the bushes that are nearby. I have this itching feeling that Santana is going to drive to school yet again and she's going to pull up any minute now, honking her horn to scare the crap out of me._

_Sure enough I see Santana's car pull up a minute later with one arm hanging out the window. I look through the windshield and see her frowning. She reaches across to the passenger seat and I see her grab her phone and unlock it. She looks up in what I recognize as concentration before smiling and going back to her phone. I can only assume at this point that she's probably typing out a text message to send to me._

_PERFECT TIME._

_I slowly make my way around to the back of her car and duck to make sure she won't see me. Right before I make my move to the driver's side door, I see my phone flashing in the palm of my hand and I freeze. Thank God I left it on silent. I swipe my finger across my screen and see Santana's text light up._

_[S:] You're laaaate! Still trying to find an extremely distracting outfit to wear today? Btw, I win ;P_

_I almost laugh out loud at her text but quickly remember the task at hand. I lean around the back of her car to check if she'll be able to see me. Thankfully she's turned towards the passenger side, looking up and down the sidewalk, probably looking to see which way I'll be walking up._

_I take a deep breath and close my eyes. "Please don't kill me..." I whisper softly before jumping up to her window and screaming._

_The next few seconds goes by in a blur. When I open my eyes slowly I see dark strands of hair mixed with blonde. I suddenly feel a sharp pain shoot up my left arm and realize that the front of my body is being pushed against the side of her car. She has snaked her arm with my left one, pulling it behind my back and is using my wrist as leverage to keep my body in place. Her body is flushed with mine and her breath is hitting the back of my neck making me weak in the knees. I should scare her more often, I think to myself._

_"Brittany?" she breathes._

_"Am I dead?" I ask. She laughs and drops her head in relief onto my shoulder._

_"Did I win?" I whisper to her temple making her giggle._

_She turns her head to look at me and rolls her eyes, "You win Britt."_

_"So is this going to be like a weekly thing now?" I ask while trying to hide the blush that I know is occupying my cheeks._

_She slowly lets go of my wrist and steps back, allowing me to turn around and face her completely._

_"I like it." She answers. "It's our own little time for us to just be us, with just… us." She adds with an innocent smile and it makes me blush. _

_"Well I hope you learned your lesson on scaring me all the time." I tell her and she laughs before grabbing the wrist that she was suffocating earlier. Her fingers dance across my flesh there._

_"I'm sorry." She whispers, ducking her eyes down to avoid mine._

_"Totally worth it." I tell her with as much sincerity my voice can offer. She looks up and gives me one of those sweet dimpled smiles. _

* * *

I decided late last night that I'm going to make this Wednesday different. I woke up extra early and got ready as fast as I could. The moment I was able, I quickly made my way down the street, not going in the direction of the bus stop.

My feet are slightly grazing the sidewalk beneath me as I smile when I see the familiar car still parked in the driveway. It was a cold morning so before getting here I stopped by the gas station down the road to pick up two cups of coffee. I sit down on the curb and sip on my coffee in silence, waiting. I'm waiting longer than expected though, she must be running late. I guess I didn't really need to wake up early, but I probably would've anyways because I was anxious to surprise her.

"Mami! You didn't fucking wake me up you bitch! Now I'm late to pick her up. I swear to God if she's not there and ended up taking the bus I'm going to fucking hunt you down and go ALL Lima Heights on your sorry ass!"

I look behind me to see Santana rushing out of the front door screaming into her cell phone. I think it was her roommate on the other end, I've heard Santana call her 'Mami' a few times, strange nickname but whatever. Santana's struggling between putting her sweater on, holding up her many books, and locking the door. All while her phone is tucked between her ear and shoulder. I laugh quietly at the sight and stand to make my way towards her.

"No. You know what Richy Bitch? I don't care what our roommate agreement says, I am so not washing dishes this week." she yells. I stop walking when I reach her car and lean casually onto it, still sipping my coffee, enjoying the scene in front of me. She's done locking her front door now, and is just standing there still facing her house.

"And you know what else? You know I need it every morning but yet you still didn't even fucking leave me any coff-" just as she was about to finish her sentence she whips her body around and sees me. Her eyes instantly find mine, and widen. I quirk my eyebrow and raise the coffee in my other hand to her.

"Coffee?" I smirk. Her phone conversation long forgotten now as she shoves her phone into her sweater pocket. She takes a step towards me and grabs the cup from my hands.

"How-" she questions and I giggle at her.

"We're gonna be late if you don't hurry up and unlock your car." I tease.

She snaps out of her shock to press the unlock button on her key. I step in and sit while watching her as she walks around to the driver's side and gets in. She turns to me and smiles.

"Hey." she says softly.

"Hi." I say back. We stare at each other for a few minutes. I don't know what we were doing but I think she's trying to see who would look away first. Her competitive nature just seeping through her.

"San?" I break the silence.

"Hm?" she whispers, our eyes still locked onto each other.

"We're gonna be late." I look away shyly and sip on my coffee again.

She giggles and pulls her car out of the driveway. I don't miss it when she whispers "I win" under her breath. It makes me smile into my coffee.

* * *

In the middle of my third class, I get a text message from Santana. It makes me nervous at first because I know that right now she should be starting class with Devin. I wonder if their talking about me.

I open her text and quickly get sucked in, completely forgetting the fact that I should probably be taking notes right now.

_[S:] Hey Britt, you doing anything after school today?_

_[B:] Hmmm, I wanna say I'll be catching a ride with a certain cute brunette but idk, I don't wanna just assume… :)_

_[S:] Haha, well that cute brunette might need to go to the library for a few hours after her classes to do some research. Is that okay?_

_[B:] Yeah I think so… Wait, do I work?_

_[S:] Are you asking me?_

_[B:] Yes?_

_[S:] B, I don't know if you work haha. I don't know your work schedule. Do you work?_

_[B:] Are you asking me now?_

_[S:] What? Yes? haha._

_[B:] Oh. No I don't work. Why what's up?_

_[S:] *facepalm* You're so lucky you're cute._

_[B:] :D_

* * *

I was practically running to the library as soon as my last class of the day was dismissed. I knew Santana finished her last class at the same time and I wanted to beat her to the library.

When I got close to the doors of the building, I saw Santana walking up from the opposite direction at the same pace I was. She was trying to balance her books in her arms when she glanced up for a second and saw me.

When she suddenly stopped walking, so did I. From both our positions, we were roughly about the same distance from the library doors. The side of her lips quirk up along with her eyebrow, questioning me, challenging me.

Just as I saw her take her first step, I took mine.

* * *

"I totally won that one San."

"You can't win if you're not playing fair Brittany."

"I was totally playing fair! If anything, you're the one that started before I did."

"Screaming 'DINOSAUR!' and pointing behind me, is not considered fair."

"You're the one that actually looked."

"Don't judge me."

* * *

We've been in the library for almost thirty minutes now and I can't help but stare at Santana the whole time. Every time she scrunches her nose up in confusion, every time she runs her fingers through her hair, every time she gets up to stretch her legs and grab a book from the shelves, every time she walks back from the shelves and smiles at me; she knows that I'm still staring. Every time she glances up and catches my eyes in hers only to quickly look back to her notes, I catch those little things, every time. It's magnetic. She's magnetic.

* * *

"Sooooooo Britt..."

"Yes?"

"It's February."

"It is."

"It is..."

* * *

When we decide to take a break to clear our heads, she moves her chair closer to mine and my eyes catch the movement of her lips. I try my hardest to focus on what she's saying. She tells me she wants to talk. I nod. She tells me she wants to ask me something. I blink and nod again. When her lips move again I have to force my eyes away. I latch my gaze onto her eyes in hopes that it'll help me concentrate on actually holding a conversation instead of daydreaming.

Bad idea.

I get lost in her eyes so quickly that I feel like I'm almost drowning. She stops talking but it's not like I noticed.

"Britt?" a small voice in the back of my head whispers. I ignore it.

"Brittany?" It's louder now and I realize that it's Santana speaking. I shake my head and blink a few times to bring my eyes back to reality.

"I'm sorry. What were you saying?" I ask, too embarrassed to look at her.

She giggles and it makes my stomach do a back flip. She leans to her side and rest her head on my shoulder.

"Never mind, I'll ask you another time." She whispers.

* * *

"Britt?"

"Hm?"

"I was wondering…"

"Yes. They are."

"… What?"

"Dolphins are just gay sharks."

"Britt…"

"We weren't thinking the same thing were we?"

"Nope."

"Oh."

"Do you have any plans for the weekend?"

"Not really… just study group as usual."

"Oh. Okay."

* * *

We walk out of the library and make our way to the parking structure. I instantly wrap my pinky around hers and we fall into a comfortable silence. It was strange how the simple gesture always seemed to make Santana happy. As much as she tried to hide it, I always could feel it whenever she glanced at our hands.

"I'm really glad I met you." She says to me softly.

* * *

"San?"

"Yea?"

"Are we not gonna listen to music?"

"Not today Britt. I kinda just wanted to talk, no distractions."

"Are you okay?"

"Just nervous…"

"Nervous about what?"

"Everything…"

* * *

When we reach my bus stop she parks her car a little down the road to make sure she won't block traffic. We ended up not talking the whole ride except for that one time. When she told me she was nervous she wasn't kidding. During the ride home she kept fidgeting in her seat and strumming her fingers along the steering wheel. She didn't even flinch a muscle when a few cars swerved in front of her for going too slow.

I noticed her resolve slowly getting more and more nervous throughout the day but at this point she really was at her most timid state. It was frightening but at the same time I couldn't help but find it adorable. She was nervous about something. Insecure and unsure.

She turned to face me completely. She forced a smile and I tried my best not to frown at the sight.

"I wanna take you out on a date." She suddenly blurts out and her eyes widen. Clearly this wasn't how she planned it out in her head. I almost want to laugh at her adorableness but stop myself and give her a soft smile. So this is why she was nervous?

"I'd love to Santana." I answer back immediately. She noticeably relaxes a little.

"Really?" she asks, still sounding unsure. Her hands fidgeting in her lap now, trying to find something to do.

"Really." I tell her with a smile.

"Friday?" she asks. I can see that she's still unsure and this whole thing makes me feel giddy. Do I make her feel this way? _This_ nervous? I reach over and grab her hand to help calm her nerves.

"Any day." I pull her into a hug, "As long as I'm with you."

* * *

As I'm walking home I grab my phone out and send my best friends a mass text telling them that she finally asked me out on a date. My phone almost dies from the amount of text messages that they send back to me.

_Eric: __WHAT?_

_SERIOUSLY!?_

_SHE FINALLY DID IT!_

_We need to go shopping. _

_Like right now._

_Actually maybe not me, I hate that kinda thing. _

_Take Joel and Ryan._

_But I definitely wanna see the outfit._

_Lemme know when you girls are done so I can come over and approve._

_So Friday huh? Luuuuuuuucky._

I roll my eyes before opening Joel's messages.

_Joel: __OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG_

_Lemme know when you get home, we're going shopping. _

_Where are you guys going?_

_I'm thinking black dress. Perfect for practically EVERYTHING._

_Especially the naughty naughty ;P_

_Or blue, or yellow._

_NO. We are sticking with black._

_Don't listen to Ryan._

_OMG AND ON FRIDAY?_

_I'm almost dying from the amount of rainbow colored adorabeness._

_CALL ME._

I feel tempted to send this entire thing to Eric just because I know he'd appreciate it.

_Ryan: __GUUUUUURL!_

_This better not be a prank. _

_DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH ME BRITTANY S. PIERCE._

_I almost jumped out of my seat at work and screamed._

_Shopping time. Gonna text Joel._

_I get off in half an hour so you better be ready!_

_Fifty bucks says he wants black but I'm gonna prove him wrong._

_FIRST DATE! _

_And on VALENTINES DAY!? _

_She couldn't be any more romantic even if she tried._

_I'm so excited for you B._

I stop dead in my tracks. I read and reread his text a few times to make sure I'm reading it correctly. I quickly exit out of my messages and go straight to my calendar. I stare at it for a few seconds and it finally hits me like a school bus. I've been so distracted by how adorable Santana was being that I didn't even think about it. She was so nervous about asking me out because Friday was…

_Valentines Day._

My phone vibrates and I go back to my messages. It was a text from Devin. It had exactly one line and exactly six words. It almost made me cry right then and there. He was closer to Santana then the others by now since they shared a class.

_Devin: __Do this right. Don't hurt her._

What did I just get myself into?

* * *

**AN: I know right? What the effff Devin? Why you gotta bring us all down for? We were having such an adorable chapter and there you go, ruining it for everyone.**

**Next chapter… THE DATE! Or maybe not? Heh, don't hate me please :)**


	6. Chapter Snix

**AN: I'm not sure if the chapter title matches the actual chapter... I just really wanted to name it 'Chapter Snix'. Haha.**

* * *

Santana POV

Chapter Snix

"Okay how about this one?" I ask while walking into view of the webcam.

"Ew." Quinn says with a mock gagging noise.

"It needs more gold!" Rachel screams before running across the room only to come back with a bag full of gold stars and a bedazzler. Quinn rolls her eyes and snatches the bag from Rachel's hands.

"Rachel what the hell were you planning to do with that? It's not like you can bedazzle her dress through Skype."

"I was just going to hold it against the screen to see if it looks good." Rachel hastily grabs the bag back and holds one of the gold stars up. "Perfect. I can send over everything you need through overnight shipping. It should be there just in time for your date tomorrow. Call me as soon as it arrives and I can talk you through the process step by step. I can't have you breaking anything. Oh my God, maybe you could even add a few-"

"HOLY SHIT HOBBIT. Would you just shut the hell up? I am definitely not taking notes on style from _you. _The only reason you're even in on this Skype call is because you live there. Actually, I'm pretty sure I told Quinn to make sure that you weren't home when we did this. Clearly I shouldn't have trusted her because she's a _bitch _and enjoys making my life a living hell every chance she gets. And since _you're _such a blabber mouth, you just _had _to go and call Kurt and Blaine over. If I were there you know what I would do? I'd take that precious bedazzler of yours, and shove it up your-"

"Ohhhhkay! Santana, calm down. Rachel go stand... over there." Kurt steps into view and points to the other side of the living room. Rachel groans before getting up and steps back to where Kurt pointed.

"More..." Kurt says and Rachel steps backwards closer to the open door of her bedroom. "MORE." he says a little more sternly and Rachel frowns as she takes one last step right into her bedroom. "Now that's what _I _call _PERFECT_. Stay."

I roll my eyes at my idiot friends. I walk closer to my laptop and sit down on the chair in front of it. My hands go straight to my face and I groan loudly into my palms.

"Babe come on, it can't be _that _hard to find an outfit." Sugar finally speaks up as she gets up from my bed and rubs my back. I look at her and force a smile. Then I turn back to my laptop screen to look at my friends, far far away in the whole other universe known as New York City.

Quinn is sitting in the seat in front of the laptop, her back turned to me, making faces at Rachel still standing in her bedroom doorway. I see Kurt, now behind them, talking animatedly to Blaine, trying to explain to him that putting hair gel on his many bowties is definitely not a good idea.

"Mami. Help me. Please." I beg. She giggles and grabs my arm, pulling me up from my seat and onto my bed. She pushes down on my shoulders until I finally give in and fall back onto my sheets and clothes. She walks away from me and steps into my walk-in closet.

"Just lay here and rest. Let Sugar Mami do all the work."

"Waaaanky. But no thanks, I prefer blondes. " I smirk.

She steps out of my closet and throws a balled up shirt towards me, effectively landing it right on my head. "Shut it or you're going dressed in a potato sack."

"So where are you taking her? What kind of outfit are we thinking? Casual? Dressy? Sexy?" Kurt appears on my screen again.

My eyes widen at his words and the panic sets in as I sit up abruptly. Quinn seems to be the only one to see my inner turmoil because she speaks up. "Oh dear. Santana, please tell me that I'm wrong and you're really not that stupid."

I look up at her and see Kurt looking back and forth between Quinn and the computer. "What? What happened? Let me in on this! Why is she stupid?" he asks frantically.

"She's stupid because she doesn't know where she's going to take Brittany..." Quinn fills him in and he gasps.

"Santana! How did you not think that through? It's your first date! It needs to be PERFECT. Do you know what Blaine and I did on our first date? He took me to a bowtie convention. A. FREAKING. BOWTIE. CONVENTION."

"You know you loved it!" Blaine suddenly yells from across the living room. Kurt just rolls his eyes and mouths, 'That's what he thinks.' I manage to laugh at that. Still, I can't help but freak out at this point. The fact is, I had no idea where I was going to go tomorrow.

"I didn't think past the whole asking out part of it. It never occurred to me that I should be thinking about the perfect date. Oh man, what am I gonna do? I need alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol." I jump to my feet and right before I step out of my bedroom Sugar grabs my arm to stop me.

"San sweetie, it's barely past breakfast. Plus you have a whole closet full of clothes that you need to squeeze in and out of." she spins me around and walks me back to the bed. "And since I'm the only one that's actually here in person, I don't wanna be the one doing all the work if you're falling all over the place and/or passed out."

I groan and do a little shimmy out of the dress that I was wearing. When I stand straight again I get smacked in the face by a pair of jeans and a cute top. I glare at Sugar before putting on everything she gave me. I walk over to the mirror on my wall to inspect.

"What about a movie?" I ask as I turn my body around to look at my ass.

"Boring." Quinn tells me.

"SO cliche!" Rachel yells from her spot. Wow, I forgot she was there.

"What movie, who's in it, and is he cute?" Kurt asks and I roll my eyes.

"Okay, no movie then. What about dinner?" I offer again.

"I'm pretty sure all of their previous comments still apply to that suggestion," Sugar says as she walks out of the closet, "Well maybe not Kurt's one but he's gay. Nothing makes sense when he speaks so it's okay." Kurt feigns hurt by placing his hand at his chest and scoffs. Sugar shrugs, "Sorry, Asperger's." She steps closer to me and eyes my body up and down. She shakes her head and motions for me to strip again. She turns to walk out, "I'm going to grab some clothes in my room that I think would look good."

"NO animal print!" I yell loud enough so she'll hear me.

"Okay Santana focus, what does Brittany like?" Kurt asks.

"UGH. I don't know..." I pout. What does she like? Unicorns? Rain? "Raining Unicorns?"

"What?" Quinn quirks an eyebrow.

"Nothing. Never mind. Maybe, I should ask Devin." I say as I lean across my bed and grab my phone from the charger.

"Who's Devin?" Rachel yells from the bedroom and I roll my eyes. She's really going to stay there isn't she?

"Her best friend." I explain. My phone vibrates in my hand and I let out a chuckle when I see that it's Devin calling. "Speaking of the devil." I answer and put it on speaker . "Devin! Quick, what does Brittany like?" I skip the hello and go straight to business.

"Raining Unicorns." he deadpans and I yell out a loud 'HA', pointing toward my computer.

"Ok I'm lost." Quinn shakes her head.

"Yea, what?" Kurt says.

"What about gold stars? Does she like gold stars?" Rachel shakes the bag in her hand.

"I'm assuming that I'm on speaker?" Devin questions.

"Yea, sorry about that. I'm on a Skype call with my other friends Kurt and Quinn."

"And Rachel! Rachel is here and is a Friend!" Rachel shouts.

"Shut it RuPaul." I glare at her. She probably doesn't see it but I do it anyways. I walk up to my desk and put my phone down next to my laptop. "Anyways Devin, I hereby enlist your help. I don't know what to do on my date."

"Oh well in that case..." he hesitates, "I can't help you. Sorry."

"What!? Why? I thought you were my friend!? I have notes remember? Notes equals friendship. We've been through this already." I tell him, leaning closer to my phone.

"Oh wow. Now I'm really lost." Quinn turns to Kurt.

"Yea no kidding." Kurt chuckles. Devin laughs before speaking up again.

"I would totally help you Santana but you should know by now that if it's Brittany that you're taking out, it's gotta be something you came up with. It'll be more special for her that way."

"You're only getting half of my notes." I glare at my phone and cross my arms over my chest.

"I get all of them. The notes were agreed upon in different terms. I get crepes, you get notes, you give me notes, we become friends."

"I hate you." I tell him. Then I realized that he's the one that called me, "You called me though so what did you need?" I ask.

"Oh. Right..." he's hesitating again, "I was going to ask you something but it's okay. I don't need to."

"Just ask would you? No need to get your panties in a bunch, I'm already on the line so fire away."

"Okay then. Um..." he pauses and I roll my eyes, "Where should I take Joel out?" he blurts out.

"You're fucking kidding me right?" I laugh. He's really going to ask for my help right after telling me he won't help me?

"I asked him earlier today and he said yes." He explains. "I'll give up two weeks of my Joel time and take notes if you help me."

"You take notes for two weeks, help me with Brittany's date and I'll help you with yours." I counter.

"A month of notes and you help me. I won't help with your date though. I'm not budging on that."

"A month _and _you do _all _the speaking during the next presentation. Plus you have to only give input on my ideas for the date, if it's good or bad kinda stuff."

"Two weeks, _three fourths _speaking, and _only _good or bad." he finalizes.

"You went back down to two!" I yell back.

"Yea but I'm offering good or bad now."

"Fine, DEAL."

"DEAL." We hang up and I smile. I was shooting for one week, half the speaking and outfit help. I'm awesome.

"Okaaaay, what the hell was that?" Quinn asks and I look up suddenly. I forgot I was still on Skype. Through the time that I was talking, Blaine and Rachel came up to the screen and everyone looks confused.

"I just got help for my date. I need help with outfits now. That's where you gays come in." I see Rachel about to lift her bedazzler but Kurt stops her.

"Not you Rachel. Go back to where you came from." He says and she deflates.

"If you hurry I think you can catch the next flight out to Israel. It leaves in about forty-five minutes." I tell her and she rolls her eyes before getting up and walking back to her room.

Sugar comes back into my room with two very large baskets of clothes. We spend the better part of three hours trying to find the perfect outfit. I was also texting Devin back and forth on ideas and helping him with his date too.

By the time it hits 1:30 in the afternoon my stomach is practically eating itself so Sugar and I say goodbye to our friends on Skype and go out for lunch. We go to the closest mall because I figured we could eat and go shopping after.

After we arrive home from an exhausting day of shopping, I've found the perfect outfit and I'm pretty sure Sugar has bought more stuff than I did. Sugar called for me to come eat dinner but I told her that I was just going to turn in for the night. I was too nervous to eat. I fall asleep after a few hours of just laying on my bed thinking about tomorrow.

_D-I-N-0-S-A-U-R a dinosaur!_

Brittany's personal ringtone wakes me from my dreams in the middle of the night. I smile tiredly and quickly reach to grab my phone off of the nightstand.

"Eoo?" I manage to mutter. I'm actually surprised that anything even came out really. When I'm tired, I'm tired. I hear shuffling noises at the other end of the line followed by the most amazing giggle.

"San?" she whispers softly and it makes me melt. I force myself to wake up a bit so that I can talk to her for as long as I can.

"Hey Britt-Britt." I rub my eyes and yawn.

"You answered." She sounds relieved. Of course I answered.

"Are you okay?" I look to my side and stare at my alarm clock until my eyes focus completely, "Britt it's just past twelve, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." She hesitates, "I just wanted to tell you Happy Valentine's day..."

I don't really say anything. Of course, I _want _to say something. I want to tell _her _Happy Valentine's day. Hell, I want to tell it to her forever. But the fact that she called me at twelve in the morning just to tell me this makes the butterflies in my stomach spaz around like crazy, causing me to mutter random incoherent sounds.

She lets out a nervous laugh before finishing, "And I wanted to make sure your day started off good. So that you aren't _completely _mad..."

And here comes the bomb.

"Why would I be mad?" I ask even though I'm dreading the answer.

"I have to cancel-" she starts but I cut her off.

"NO."

"What?" she asks me.

"No..." I try again softer, pleading. I sit up and I shake my head. This is not happening.

"San, I'm SO sorry."

"Why? What happened?" Clearly, I don't take rejection very well.

"Something came up and I won't have any time today. I'm so so sorry Santana. Please know that. If I could, I would be over there right now to tell you Happy Valentine's day than just on the phone."

"Britt," I sigh and run my free hand through my hair, "are you serious?"

"I am. Really Santana, I'm so sorry."

"I gotta go."

"Don't, please." she pleads with me. I can't handle this right now.

"Britt, to be honest, I'm a little mad right now. And I feel stupid for being mad, because I know it's not your fault."

"Can we just talk?"

"Maybe later okay? I just don't think I can right now."

"Okay I'm sorry. Call me later? Please?"

"Yea, I'll call you later."

"Happy Valentine's day."

"Happy Valentine's day B." I hang up and fall back into my bed. Why does this hurt so much? I feel like a fucking idiot. I stare at my ceiling until I fall back asleep.

* * *

It's barely 8:00am when I wake up again. The reality of what happened last night finally kicks in when I feel my phone tucked to my side instead of on my nightstand like usual. I grab it and hurl it across my room making it bounce a few times on the carpet.

I flail my arms and legs, thrashing around my bed, but feel embarrassed immediately afterwards because I probably just looked like a child on a temper tantrum. I hate this so much. Being stood up on Valentine's Day is worse than not having a date on Valentine's Day in the first place. This way you know you had a date, but you just weren't important enough.

Now I'm just going to mope around the house all day and act like a whiny teenager. Sugar isn't going to like this one bit. Maybe I can go for a run, let out some frustration and get at least a good workout from it.

I walk out of my room and go to the bathroom. After a quick shower and my morning routine, I go back to my room to change into some running clothes. Maybe I'll run all the way to the gym, get in good workout, shower there, and then walk back. Or maybe I'll just bus it back. Either way, I pack a change of clothes in a duffel bag just in case.

I don't mind running with a duffel bag, my high school cheerleading coach made me run with a lot worse. I haven't been working out as much as I did back when I was still in high school so it might be a bit of a challenge. It would be a good way to gauge if I was still in shape though.

I walk out of my room with my small duffel strapped across my chest and go straight for the front door.

"Hold it right there missy!" Sugar calls from the kitchen. I turn to look at her standing in the kitchen doorway and she puts her hands on her hips, one of them holding a spatula. "Where do you think you're going? You have a date in a few hours."

My head falls back and I let out a loud groan while I walk past her to the small counter and sit at a stool. I take my bag off and let it fall to the ground beside me.

"She canceled." I tell her and her face softens. "She called me earlier to tell me." Sugar moves from her spot and comes up from behind to hug me. I don't sink into it. I'm still too mad. When she lets go, I stand up and put my bag back on.

"I'm going to the gym." I tell her, while walking out the kitchen and out the front door. I stretch for a few minutes in the morning sun before I go right into a steady pace towards the direction of the gym. If I run anything like I did before, I should get there in about thirty minutes. After a few good hours at the gym, I should be too exhausted to be mad.

I reach into my pocket and pull out my IPod and earphones. I go right to the most appropriate playlist for this type of situation.

'SNIX'

* * *

As I jog past the familiar park across the street to my left, I check my timer on my phone. _Forty-two minutes. _Not too bad. Even though a giant fence blocks my view, I know that the gym is around the corner to my right, so I kick it up a notch to spend my last spurt of energy.

Just as I round the corner I get hit head-on by another body and we fall back in pain. The back of my head connects painfully with the concrete of the sidewalk.

"Fuuuuuuuuuck." I wince as I try to sit up. I look to the person I ran into and my eyes fluctuate in and out of focus. From what I can tell though it seems to be a guy. Guy or not, I will cut a bitch if he tries to argue with me at this point. Actually he kinda looked like Mike Chang, my friend from high school, but that's probably just because he was Asian. Is that racist? Probably.

He rolls over onto his hands and knees trying to catch his breath. He probably just got the wind knocked out of him. "What the fuck was that?" he manages.

"_That _was me, you asshole." I snap at him.

"Yea, I figured as much. Why the hell are you running full speed around a corner for? Are you stupid?"

Is he fucking serious right now? Hell no, I do NOT need this right now.

"Fuck you, I made sure to run closer to the outside just in case. You're the genius that wasn't paying attention."

"I'm the one that's supposed to run on the outside! We're running opposite directions on a sidewalk, you run to the right, and I run to your left. TRANSLATION, I run outside, YOU RUN INSIDE. It's like an unspoken rule lady. Keep to the right, type shit. Seriously, what the fuck." He wobbles to his feet and I do the same.

When we both seem to recover, we look at each other and we freeze.

"Oh what the hell George Takai. Are you fucking kidding me?" I tell him. Standing there right before me is fucking Devin. Just what I needed, another person to remind me of the blonde that shut me down.

"What the fuck me!? What the fuck you, Sha-Queer-a." he throws back.

"Fuck you."

We stand there for a few seconds and we both end up leaning back against the fence to catch our breaths.

"So you too huh?" he breaks the silence first. I sigh and stare at a few cars passing by.

"How'd you know?" I ask him.

"From what you told me yesterday, you should've been getting ready by now."

"How'd it happen for you?"

"He got called in for work." he sighs.

"Damn."

"Yeah."

"This day sucks."

"Totally."

I push myself off of the fence and turn to him. "Come on, look at us. This is pathetic. Let's just forget that this holiday even exists and go get drunk."

"Santana you're not even old enough to drink. Plus it's like ten o'clock." He stands up straight.

"Then let's go do something to get our minds off of our lame crushes until it's a more appropriate time to drink our faces off. You're old enough, I'll just give you money." I tell him and he thinks about it for a few minutes before shrugging.

"Sounds good. I got the perfect thing." He grins and I can't help but smile back. If it's Devin we're talking about, then it's going to be good.

* * *

"Two days and... two weeks." He says while throwing the tennis ball back to me. I catch it and look at the couple across the park. His 'idea' was going to the park across the street and pretty much make fun of anyone we saw. That soon escalated when couples started to show up to the park for a 'romantic' Valentines date. We made a new game that consists of us basically guessing how long they've been together, and since we were bitter and evil, we also guessed on how long until they would break up.

"What? No way. Look at her face. She's totally not liking this at all. I say, one month, and one week. It looks like she's been with him enough to know he's okay to date, so about one month. But she probably told herself that she'll give him one last chance on Valentine's Day to make her think it's actually gonna go somewhere. I give them one more week tops." I throw the ball back to him and he laughs.

"Okay okay fine, what about that one?" He motions his head behind me and throws the ball. I purposely miss catching it and let it fall behind my back. When I turn to grab it I look up at the teen couple walking on the sidewalk. I roll my eyes before grabbing the ball and turning back to Devin.

"Three weeks and two months." I tell him and throw the ball.

"Nah, three months and one month."

"Yea, probably. Oh! What about that one!" I point across the field at the young couple laying out a blanket with a picnic basket.

"Oh wow. Okay, one week and... four days. Dude is totally gay and from the looks of it, that picnic basket is his. He started dating her 'cause he needed a beard to show his parents that he was 'normal'. She looks completely oblivious to that fact. Poor thing probably thinks this is the most romantic thing that has ever happened to her so she's gonna try to get her sexy on today afterwards. He's gonna freak, and dump her within days."

"Wow, speaking from experience are we?" I tease and he throws the ball back at me a little harder than before. "Geez, no need to get crazy Sulu. It was just a joke."

He rolls his eyes and I throw it back to him. We play our 'game' for about an hour more until we finally realize that we've pretty much insulted everyone's relationships in the park.

We head back to the gym and we both take a quick shower and I change into more appropriate clothes. Thank God I brought them, I didn't want to be stuck in my workout clothes all day.

He drives us to the mall and we make our way to the restaurants. I honestly don't care what we eat at this point, as long as it's edible. I'm pretty sure Devin is thinking the same as me because we don't even have to ask each other where we want to go. We just walk in to the first restaurant we see.

We get seated by the window looking out to the passing shoppers. Our waitress greets us with a 'Happy Valentine's Day!' and I already hate her. She hands us our menus and begins to tell us about their 'Lunch for Two Valentine's Special' making me want to rip her head off.

We place our orders quickly so that she could get out of our faces and I tell her that we want separate checks, in which we receive a very unsubtle disapproving look.

"Separate?" she questions and I roll my eyes.

"GAAAY." Devin says as he points to himself, then points to me, "LEEESBIAN."

She shuts her mouth almost in comical fashion and I have to stifle a laugh. She walks away quickly and we bust out in laughter.

"Okay time for my game now." I sit up in my chair and smile at him, "Gay or Straight."

"Oh I love this game. I always try to get Brittany to play with me but she thinks it's too mean."

We play my game throughout lunch and soon we found it creepy that we were basically just stalking people with our eyes, guessing if they were gay or straight. We even threw in ratings of how gay someone was on a one to ten scale.

"We're horrible people aren't we? We couldn't even honestly complement five people in a day even if we tried." Devin tells me. It was pretty true actually. We spent most of our day so far tearing other people down.

"I think we could. We're nice _sometimes. _Just mean most of the other times." I shrug.

"Okay fine, let's do it. We have to complement five different people. We don't actually have to go up to them and tell them though, 'cause that's just weird. One person, one point. If we say anything mean about anyone, we lose a point." He tells me. I think about it for a few seconds. Seems easy enough so I tell him okay.

We spend another hour trying to find five people worthy of our compliments. It was surprisingly really hard because we both pretty much hated everyone. It was hard not to spew out my evil wrath of words.

By the time we left the restaurant, we were negative ten points. Damn, this game is hard. Who knew being nice took actual effort? We walk around the mall together, determined to make up for the negative. When we finally zero out, we leave quickly in hopes that the less people we see, the less chance of us going negative again.

He pulls up to his house and we both make our way inside.

"Okay we can pre game here before we go to this bar I used to go to when I was underage. They never card but I usually like to go around nine or ten because the people around that time seem to be less rowdy." He tells me as he walks around his breakfast bar and into the kitchen. His house had an open layout so it seemed bigger than mine.

"Yeah that sounds good. So we have a couple of hours to get shit faced. Are we gonna cab it there then?"

"Yeah. Here." He hands me a cup of some mixed drink.

"What is it?" I ask him while swishing the drink around in the cup.

"ALCOHOL." He laughs, "Just drink it Santana."

I roll my eyes and take a big swig from the cup. It tasted pretty good actually, a little sweet but whatever gets me drunk I guess.

* * *

We stumble into the bar around 9:00pm and go straight to the counter. Devin orders us two beers and he was right, the bartender didn't even card me. When he places the beer in front of me I take a few gulps before settling into my new favorite bar.

"So how'd Brittany break it to you?" Devin asks after he downs his first beer and motions to the bartender for another.

"She called me at twelve to say Happy Valentine's Day and then proceeded to break my heart into a million pieces."

"Harsh." his face turns to painful expression.

"I know right. What about Joel?"

"He didn't even call. He just texted me telling me he took over a shift. I think he just thought it was gonna be just a regular hang out day."

"Damn. I need to tell Brittany to talk some sense into that boy."

"Please do. So how sorry was she?"

"Super fucking sorry. I had to get off the phone because she was making it difficult for me to be mad at her." Now that I think about it though, I feel like I have at least some right to be mad. I was stood up for Christ sake. I should be raging right now.

"I know the feeling. One time, she accidently almost blew up my kitchen trying to concoct this new recipe, but she said sorry so many times that I just gave in and helped her clean up." He laughs.

"God, what is up with that? You think she knows she's doing it? Or she really is everything that is good in this world?"

"She's everything that's good and more." He concludes and raises his glass to mine.

"Amen to that." I laugh and tap my bottle to his. I see Devin make a strange face as he looks behind me. Just as I'm about to turn around I hear the low growl of a man's voice at my ear.

"Hey baby. Couldn't help but overhear your conversation with your queer boyfriend. If you want I could help _straighten _some things out for you."

Oh hell no. This is definitely not happening right now. I am way too drunk for this to _actually _be happening. If this is seriously happening to me then Jesus hates me. He just hates me.

"Get lost man. We weren't even talking to you." Devin tells him. I look at Devin and I can tell he's trying his hardest not to break this guys neck. I see the grip on his bottle tighten and he clenches his jaw.

"I wasn't fucking talking to you homo." The man snaps at Devin. I guess that does it though because Devin jumps to his feet and shoves the disgusting man away from me.

Suddenly another guy stands up next to the sad excuse of a human being. This one was smaller though. He looked too young to be in here, probably snuck in with his homophobic friend.

"Hey watch it!" the smaller one yells at us.

"I suggest you sit the fuck back down kid before you hurt yourself." Devin takes a step towards him.

"Or what? You gonna hit him with your penis and give him AIDS?" the bigger one steps back to where he was. Devin laughs.

"Nah, I'm sure you'd do a better job with that one than me."

"Fuck you I'm not queer!" the younger one yells.

"You just keep telling yourself that." Devin teases and it makes the older man speak up.

"You better fucking watch your mouth, _fag_."

"Fuck you. Santana lets go." Devin grabs my arm and pulls me to my feet. The bigger guy steps in front to stop us before we are even able to take a single step towards the door. I finally get a chance to see the slob, face to face, and I feel like throwing up. He had a greasy shirt on and ripped jeans. His face was sweaty and his lazy eye kept twitching every couple of seconds. Or was he winking?

"Now why would someone choose to fuck other guys when they have a perfectly fine working female right there?" the bigger man asks his friend and they share a laugh.

"Such a shame she's a dyke. I could fix that for you if you want sweetie." He provokes and I'm really starting to lose it. He can see me getting mad.

"What? You gonna say you were _born that way?_" he laughs at his own joke as he turns to his friend. Finally, I speak up.

"Were _you _born that way? Or did your boyfriend over here miss your fat forehead and come in your eye?" I point towards his lazy eye and he looks confused. After a few seconds I see the gears turning in his head as he finally registers what I said as an insult. He looks pissed.

"Theeeeeeeere it is! You're smarter than you look you know. Own it." I taunt and he takes a step closer to me as a warning. I stick my chin up puff my chest out a little to show him that he's not scaring anyone.

Suddenly I see an arm reach across my stomach, keeping me in place and I turn to my right to see Devin stepping up, his left arm out in front of me. We were all pretty much toe to toe at this point.

"I think I can take a bunch of homos," the man laughs.

"Hey! You four! Knock it off! I'll have none of that here. If you wanna act dumb do it outside." The bartender yells from across the counter. The smaller guy scoffs before turning around and walking away. The bigger guy holds his ground.

"Whatever. No wonder you queers are single on Valentine's Day." He turns to me, "Make sure to tell _Brittany _to give me a call sometime. I'll make sure to _fix _her." He whispers and starts to turn around.

That does it.

I clench my fist before connecting it right to his jaw line. I don't hold back anything. He falls back and before he can recover I'm throwing fist after fist into his face. Through his panic, he managed to get in two blows to my face but it doesn't stop me. Sure, I was pretty drunk but I didn't care. I kept my balance enough to lay everything I had on the idiot.

I didn't stop until I felt arms grab me from behind and pull me up. Before I know it, Devin and I are kicked onto the streets by a couple of really huge bouncers.

"I think we should call it a night." Devin stumbles to his feet and helps me up.

"Yeah that's probably a good idea." I wobble in place. My face fucking hurts. That bitch.

"I think our number just went down to negative one hundred." He laughs.

"Yea well tomorrow's a new day. We can be nice to people tomorrow."

"Deal" He waves down a taxi and it pulls up in front of us. "You take it. I'll stay back just in case one of those guys comes out here." He tells me pointing back to the bar.

"Yeah and do what? Stand there and put your arm out to stop it?" I smirk.

"Shut up bitch, while you were acting like a deranged animal, I had to fend off his many friends from stepping in," he points to his eye and I finally see the huge gash on the edge of his eyebrow, "If this turns into a shiner, you're doing notes for two months _and _speaking."

"Holy shit," I see some blood slowly start to move down his face, "We're gonna have one hell of a story later." I laugh and hug him, "Thanks for today Devin. I wanna say that this is the best Valentine's I've had ever but seeing as I had to get stood up to get here, it sounds kind of depressing."

"Yea well let's not make this a yearly thing okay?" he laughs as he pulls away from the hug.

We say our goodbyes and I get into the cab. When I get home I'm still pretty buzzed from all the alcohol but the fight seemed to sober me up a bit. Sugar is gonna be so pissed when I walk through that door. I've been ignoring her and Brittany's calls all day. I just didn't want to deal with any of it.

I open the door and step in, taking off my shoes and setting my stuff on the ground as quietly as I can.

"Santana? Is that you?" I hear Sugar ask from the living room and I roll my eyes. Of course she fucking stayed up to wait for me.

I make my way down the hallway and when I reach the living room I get hit by the sight of flowers. Flowers, EVERYWHERE. Huge bouquets of different types just scattered on the floor and on the coffee table. Am I still drunk?

"Babe! There you are! I've been worried sick!" Sugar jumps from the couch and runs up to me enveloping me in a death hug. When she pulls back she gets a good look at my face. "You tell me you're going to the gym and you come back shit faced? What the fuck? What happened to your face?" she touches the bruises and I wince. "I'm gonna grab some ice. STAY." She commands and disappears into the kitchen.

Not like I'm going to go anywhere or anything. I'm still looking at the sheer amount of flowers occupying our living room. I take a step towards one of the bouquets and see a white card sticking out. I grab it and open it.

_Santana,_

_Please forgive me._

_Britt-Britt_

"They're all from her." I jump and see Sugar leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen. She laughs and tells me to sit on my couch. I do as she says and she sits on the armrest before holding the bag of ice to my face.

"First one came right after you left. I guess she couldn't reach you so after an hour later she sent another. She's been sending a new one every hour so far.

"Fourteen?" I whisper after doing the math in my head. She laughs.

"Gonna be fifteen if you don't call her soon. You should read them," she motions to the card I'm still holding, "They all say different things."

"Did I fuck up?" I ask her.

"Santana, if anything, I think you're doing just fine. She's a keeper." She hands me the bag of ice before getting up and going into her room.

I lean back into my couch and sigh. I'm not sober enough for this. I get up and walk back to the front door to grab my things. When I'm in my room I take my phone out and dial Brittany's number. Definitely not sober enough for this.

"Santana?" her smooth voice fills my head and I fall into my seat at my desk.

"Hey. I'm sorry I ignored your calls." I really do feel like shit now.

"Are you okay? You sound stressed." Ugh, how can someone be this caring after being ignored for more than fourteen hours?

"I'm okay, just feeling the alcohol a little still."

Yup, that sounded like the picture of someone holding it together after being stood up. Good job Santana.

"I mean, I went out with someone for some drinks."

Great, now she thinks that I just went out and replaced her with someone else.

"A friend," I recover. "Devin. I went out for drinks with Devin."

Oh yea, totally holding it together Santana. I facepalm at my own stupidity. I can hear her laugh and it makes me feel better.

"Well I'll let you get your rest then. Thank you for calling me. At least I know you're okay." She tells me and my mind screams at me to do something.

"No wait, I just got you on the phone. Don't go yet. Stay with me till I'm sober? We still got like two hours left of Valentine's Day." I didn't want to hang up, I feel so stupid now for ignoring her all day.

"Okay. I can do that. It's the least I can do for canceling right?" she forces a laugh and it hurts.

"Don't be like that. I'm sorry I got so mad. I don't know what came over me." I try to lighten the mood.

"I just feel really bad. I'm sure I'm going to be hearing it from Devin tomorrow." She says and I laugh at that.

"Yeah, he was a little disappointed but he was mostly mad at Joel the whole night. Also if he tells you anything about a bar fight, it was all him. I had no participation what so ever." I throw that last part in there because I know he won't be able to lie to her about his eye. Not after she pouts. Nobody can lie to that pout. Nobody.

"You got in a bar fight!?" she almost yells.

"Not me... DEVIN." I tell her again.

"Don't lie to me Santana. You can't see it right now but I'm pouting. Tell me the truth."

"Your pout won't work this time Britt. I can't see it. Therefore I have the ability to resist." I laugh.

"You may not be able to _see _it but I _know _you can _imagine _it."

Right when she said that, the image of Brittany giving me her best pout fills my head. The way she would manipulate her eyes to make them plead, her eyebrows knitted together in the perfect angle, her hands on her hips, her back hunched slightly in defeat, those lips forming and her head turn just the right degree down, completing the image of her entire body in a full blown pout. Damn that pout, I give in immediately. "Fine I was in a bar fight..."

"San!" she yells and I laugh.

"I'm fine Britt, just few bruises, nothing big. You should see the other guy though. Got what was coming to him for sure."

"I wish you wouldn't be so reckless." She tells me.

"Yea well he deserved it." I reason.

"Nobody deserves it San. I don't like violence. My motto is, 'Stop the Violence'. I should make shirts and start rallies." She laughs.

"I'm sure if you just had pictures of your pout up on billboards it'll work just the same."

"Nooooo. Then it won't have the same affect on people if it's plastered everywhere! I only use my pout in serious situations. It has a better impact."

"Brittany, pouting for extra Dots on your ice cream is NOT a serious situation." I giggle at the memory.

"It is for me! Plus that's because it was you I was pouting to. You would never be able to say no to it. Not even if I used it every day."

"I'm pretty sure you _do _use it every day Britt." It's so true. Every day that I saw her she's used it against me.

"Well I can't help it if I just like taking advantage of that fact. What can I say? You're easy." She teases.

"Ouch. Twist the knife why don't ya." I tell her and she laughs.

I hear her yawn loudly into the phone and I feel bad that I'm making her stay up with me.

"If you're tired Britt, you can go."

"No, I want to stay up with you. I missed you."

Those three words that float out her mouth make my heart flip. She missed me.

"Are you snuggling stranger?" she asks and it pulls me back to our conversation.

"What? I didn't sleep with anyone, I promise." She thought I brought someone home with me?

"No silly, _Stranger_. Him/her that you got at the fair." She explains and I blush. Totally forgot that she saw that.

"Oh. No, Stranger is on the bed sleeping, I'm sitting at my desk."

I hear her shuffling and then what I assume to be her door closing. "I have an idea." she tells me and I can't help but feel scared.

"Should I be scared? I feel scared." I tell her and she laughs at me.

"Don't be such a baby Santana. I thought you were a badass?"

"I AM A BADASS. I just got into a bar fight!"

"Okay _badass._" she teases, "Open your computer and turn it on."

"Yep, now I'm scared."

"Just do it San."

"Fine." I do as she says, "Now what?"

"Now, you answer."

My Skype turns on and soon Brittany's name pops up on my screen. "You wanna video chat?"

"Just answer it Santana." she laughs.

I click on answer and a new window appears. I hang up the call on my phone and throw it somewhere. I don't know where, I just chuck the damn thing. I run my hands through my hair and blindly fix my make up with my hands. I don't know what the hell I'm doing though so I just stop. Hopefully I don't look like complete shit. It takes a couple of seconds before we both can see each other. I've never seen Brittany's room before, actually now that I think about it, I've never been to her house, but her room is just so _Brittany._

"Oh my God Santana! What happened to your face?" she leans forward trying to inspect it through webcam.

"Oh this? It's just a bruise, it'll go away after a few days." I try to shrug it off. Shit, I forgot about my bruises.

"I'm gonna yell at Devin next time I talk to him!"

"Britt it's okay. He didn't even start it. None of it was his fault. If anything he was protecting me."

"I feel so bad." she frowns, "This is all my fault."

"None of this was your fault. Look, at least I'm okay now. And I'm talking to you so I'd say my Valentine's Day was a success."

"I'm glad I got to see you today too. Even if it's through webcam."

"Yeah, who needs a first date? What do people do on first dates anyway? Talk and be awkward and learn more about each other? Sounds boring." I tell her and she laughs. Then she taps her finger on her lips. She's thinking about something. When she smiles and looks back at me I tilt my head to the side.

"Then let's have an unofficial first date. That way, on our actual first date we can skip all the boring stuff and jump right into all the fun."

"Wanky."

"Stop it," she blushes, "I'm serious. Let's do it. We have like an hour and a half left of Valentine's Day."

I think about it. It's actually a pretty genius idea. "Unofficial first date?"

"Yep. Unofficial." she nods.

"Okay."

She smiles and claps her hands in the most adorable way. When she settles down she leans forward and rests her elbows on her desk, cupping her head in her hands.

"You look beautiful." she says suddenly and I get so caught off guard that I choke on the air making its way into my lungs.

"This is so awkward." I blush.

"See? It's a good thing we're doing this now, or else our official first date would be filled with butt loads of awkward."

"Okay okay fine. You look beautiful too B." I tell her sincerely. She looked like she was in her sleeping clothes but it didn't matter, she would look gorgeous in anything.

"Thanks! I got these shorts at Walmart." she blushes before standing and showing me her pajama shorts. They were blue and had yellow ducks all over it. I only got a glance at her shorts though because the sight of her legs quickly captured my attention. Those legs seem to never end. She sits back down and resumes her previous position.

"Okay unofficial date, what do you wanna know about me?" I ask her.

"I'm not unofficial!" she pouts, "The 'first' part is unofficial. I'm official."

"You're definitely official Britt. Sorry. Okay _official _Brittany, what would you like to know?" I see her eyes look up in concentration as she thinks about her question. Finally she smiles and turns back to look at me.

"First pet?" she asks.

"None. I wasn't allowed to have pets because my parents didn't want to take care of them if I ever decided I didn't like it anymore. You?"

"I had a cat when I was growing up. His name was Mr. Piddles. First word?" she asks and I laugh.

"Legend has it that when I came out of my mother I told the nurse she was fat."

"That's mean San." she frowns.

"Yeah well, I'm a bitch." I shrug and her frown deepens making me chuckle. "Siblings?" I ask.

"Only daughter. You?"

"Me too." Okay this isn't so awkward anymore. I can do this.

"Do you like me?" she asks softly and I almost fall out of my seat.

"What?" This conversation just took a left down awkward lane.

"What is this San? What are we doing?" she says and I can tell that this has probably been bothering her for a while. I visually hesitate and she sees it. "I just need to know if this is serious or if it's just for fun."

"It's not. I'm not like that. I do like you Brittany. I like you a lot." I tell her.

"I like you too Santana." she pauses, "There's just a lot going on in my life, and I know you'll have questions, but if this is really something that you want..." she takes a breath, "I just don't think I can answer a lot of them right now." she ducks her head down and I frown at the sight. "I know I'm asking a lot, and I don't expect you to agree since we've only known each other for a month and a half."

"I want to Britt. I want this to be 'official' one day." she looks up and I smile, "If you need time to open up then I'll give you time. You can tell me when you're ready. You're worth it." She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes.

"I grew up in a small town with my mom and dad." She begins and I sit up to listen to her. She's trying, so this is a good sign. She thinks _I'm _worth it. "My dad was in the Military since before I could remember and he was away most of the time. My mom and I didn't mind too much though, we were like best friends really," I see a sad smile form on her lips, "We did everything together and during the times my dad actually came home we were all inseparable. We were the 'picture perfect family' people would tell me." her frown deepens, "A few months after my sixteenth birthday," she pauses and tears start to form in her eyes, "Someone came to our house to tell us that my dad was killed in action." She tries to blink back tears but I see a few fall anyways.

"I'm so sorry Britt. That must've been really painful for you and your mom." My heart breaks for her. The sight alone makes me want to cry and I wish more than anything that I could be there to hold her.

"Yeah, it was. My mom took it really bad. I tried my hardest to keep my feelings in control because I knew it wouldn't help her. One of us had to be strong and my mom needed it to be me."

"That's not your job though sweetie." I tell her and she looks at me with tears threatening to fall again. I hope I'm not overstepping. "You needed your mom too." And with that the floodgates opened.

"I know," she wipes some tears from her cheeks, "I needed her and I had no one else. It was like I lost both parents at once." She takes a breath before continuing, "After a few months, my mom just disappeared. Not physically, but emotionally. She just wouldn't talk, wouldn't eat, she just stopped everything. It broke my heart and I did everything I could to help her. Pretty soon the no talking turned into constant yelling, at me. Every little thing I would do would set her off." I see her face harden now and the tears pull back, "I told myself that she was gone. I've lost her completely and she was never coming back."

"So what'd you do?" I ask. I think back to the time that Brittany came to my house when I was sick. Clearly her mom was still in the picture.

"I got emancipated. It was the only option for me. I couldn't live with her anymore and the constant verbal abuse was slowly breaking me apart piece by piece."

"Wow that takes a lot of strength. How'd she take it?"

"Honestly, I'll never know. Once it was final, I got out as fast as I could. Throughout the process I met my best friend Eric because he helped me with my paperwork. He emancipated himself when he was sixteen too. At the time he was 21 and we became best friends instantly, he was like the big brother I never had. I lived with him and I never spoke to my mom again."

Never spoke to her mom again? So who was the woman on the phone? I wanted to ask but I told her that I would let her tell me things when she's ready. Maybe it's a mother-type figure?

"He convinced me to get my GED early so that I could get work because I needed income. So he helped me hire a tutor from a nearby school and after lots and lots of studying, I finally got it. We moved down here to Hawaii when I turned eighteen and we meet Devin, Ryan, and Joel."

"Wow. So you never talked to your mom again?" I ask, maybe she'll get the hint and talk about her new 'Mama'.

"Nope. I never needed to. I found a new family and I couldn't have been happier. It was bittersweet but I couldn't have asked for better friends. They take care of me, and that means more to me than blood."

Alright, I guess I'll drop it for now. She's not ready and I need to respect that. "So what about Mr. Piddles?" I ask, trying to lighten the mood but she frowns.

"That's my only regret. I couldn't take him with me."

"Why not get a new cat? To new beginnings?" I try again.

"I would but I don't really have the time. Maybe in the future."

"Well then we can share Stranger until then." I tell her and she looks at me with a shy smile, "But if you tell anyone about my secret obsession with dinosaurs then I might have to kill you." I laugh.

"I won't tell a soul. Promise." She smiles back at me.

"Plus boy Chang might want to be my new best friend. I can't have that. I have an image to maintain. Dinosaurs do not help that image." I pout and she laughs.

"Well I think it's cute that you love dinosaurs so much."

It's silent for a few seconds before I look at the time on my taskbar and start looking around me for my phone.

"What are you doing?" Brittany asks.

"Looking for my phone. I forgot to text Devin to tell him I got home safe. Shit, where did I throw it?" I get up and look around my room.

"You threw your phone?" she questions and I blush.

"Yeah, it was a heat of the moment type thing."

"Is it on loud? I'll call it." She grabs her phone and unlocks it before dialing my number. I stand still, waiting to hear the ringtone. SHIT. The ringtone!

"Britt wait!" I yell and before I know it, it happens.

_D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R a dinosaur!_

I quickly jump on my bed and reach across to the floor and grab my phone, silencing it. It's too late. I know she heard it. I slowly get up and walk back to my desk.

"Is that seriously your ringtone?" she tries to hide her laugh.

"Yeah..." I blush.

"And how is it that people don't already know that you're a dinosaur freak?"

"It's not really _my _ringtone. It's _your _ringtone."

"My ringtone?" she asks through an adoring smile, "You have special ringtone for me? One that says I'm a dinosaur, the very thing that you just happen to _love_?" she quirks an eyebrow.

Well if you put it that way...

"If it's weird I can change it." God, this is embarrassing.

"No don't do that! I like it. It's cute." She laughs, and holds her phone up, "Call me."

It was my turn to quirk my eyebrow now. Did she have a special ringtone for me as well? I do as she says and soon the sounds of her ringtone float through my laptop speakers.

_I get so emotional baby! Every time I think of you!_

The smile on my face is far too big for me to even attempt to hide it. She silences her phone and smiles. "So what's your ringtone for other people?" she asks me.

"You really wanna hear it?" I laugh and she nods. "Okay hold on." I throw my head back and shout, "MAMI! CALL MY PHONE! I LOST IT!" I hear her groan and yell back 'Seriously Santana?' I roll my eyes and look back at Brittany, "Just a sec Britt. JUST FUCKING DO IT BITCH!" I yell towards my door again.

"Don't be mean San." Brittany frowns and I shrug. The sound of my voice fills my room as my phone rings.

_Because I'm bad, I'm bad. Come on! You know I'm bad, I'm bad. You know it!_

I hear Brittany laughing and I realize that I was doing my little dance to the ringtone in front of her. I quickly stop and silence my phone.

"No don't stop there! Keep going, it was really _bad_." She teases.

"Laugh all you want but it's a good song okay. It just so happens to fit me perfectly."

I look at the time again and realize that our Valentine's unofficial first date is almost over .

"Why are you frowning?" she asks.

"Our unofficial first date is almost over."

"That does deserve a frown." I look at her and she frowns, making both of us giggle.

"I don't want it to end." I tell her honestly.

"If it never ends, we'll never get to the real one though." She pouts.

"Oh good point," I laugh. "When... will... that... be?" I ask softly, trying not to sound too eager.

"Soon I hope." She laughs.

"Good." I see her yawn and I instantly feel bad again. "I guess we should go to sleep soon. I don't wanna keep you up."

"Sleep with me?" she asks. My eyes widen and she laughs, "Wanky." I blush at the fact that she said it and not me. "No seriously though, sleep with me," she pauses, "Not like that," she pauses again, "No I mean yeah we could but not... like... now..." pause, "You can't really scissor a webcam..." pause, "I mean, Oh my God, I need to stop talking."

I burst out in laughter and she glares at me.

"You want to fall asleep together on Skype Britt? Is that what you're trying to say?" I ask and she blushes while nodding. "Okay, I can do that. Lemme just move my laptop to my bed."

"No! I don't wanna share you with Stranger... He/she gets you every night." she frowns.

"I can't really fall asleep here Britt. It won't be comfortable."

"Then put him/her on the floor." she reasons.

"What!? NO. Stranger does not go on the floor, EVER." I cross my arms across my chest.

"Then I guess you're sleeping at your desk." She smirks. "Okay, hold on real quick. I'm gonna put my laptop by my bed."

"Oh don't even think about doing that." I raise my eyebrow, "If I'm slumming it at my desk, then so are you."

"I'm not doing that. You're the one that won't put your _doll _on the floor."

"It's not a doll! It has feelings. I will not subject him/her to sleeping on the floor when I have a comfortable bed that I don't mind sharing. You're the one that doesn't want Stranger sleeping with me so you now have to sleep at your desk"

"Fiiiiiiine. If I wake up with a sore back, then you owe me a massage." She tells me before going to her bed and grabbing her purple blanket and a small pillow. I get up and do the same.

When we get settled into our make shift beds, I turn my laptop to the side and angle the screen down so we can see each other. I see Brittany do the same and smile back at me when she's finished.

"Good night Santana. Happy Valentine's Day."

"Good night Britt. Thank you for an amazing unofficial first date. Best unofficial first date ever." I giggle.

"You're welcome." She says softly, sleep taking over.

For the first time in a long time, I don't need to fall asleep to 'Whether You Fall', because this, Brittany falling asleep in front of me, is a million times better. It's not like I listened to it to get over Taylor, because that ship has sailed long ago. I listened to it to remind myself that I still needed to get back up.

And right now in this moment, I finally feel like I am.

* * *

**AN: Thank you so much to everyone who gave feedback so far! I really do appreciate it. I'm always worried about the pace of the relationship and I wasn't sure if it was too slow or too fast. If I haven't made myself clear before, you should know that Brittana IS endgame here :)**

**Also I'm sorry about the whole first date thing... at least they had an 'unofficial first date' though! I really wanted to give you guys the first date but I had something really special planned for that and it's not yet. Hint: Its chapter 8. Might actually be able to merge it with chapter 7 so it's coming! I promise!**

**P.S. I named Britt's cat after the late Mr. Piddles in The L word. May he rest in peace :(  
**


	7. Officially, Official

**AN: There's a special part in this chapter that was really fun to write. I want you guys to kind of know what I'm talking about when you read it so if you could please just Google "Spitting Caves Hawaii" and go to its Yelp page to look at some pictures, you will see what I saw when writing it. **

**Unless you live in Hawaii then you should pretty much know what I'm referring to. It's kinda of close by China Walls if you've never been. Although, if you've never been then… what are you doing sitting at home reading this? Go out now and drive your ass down to Hawaii Kai to see the awesome that is spitting caves.**

**Anyways! On to the Chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 7: Officially, Official

Santana POV

I wake up around 7:30am with half my body on my desk and half on my chair. I feel like shit and my jaw fucking hurts like crazy. I look at my computer screen and see that it's sleeping. If I think about it, I technically _slept _with Brittany last night. I can't help the cheeky grin forming on my face. I feel extremely giddy, and Brittany is the reason for that. I don't even care that I had barely enough sleep last night.

After my morning routine, I go right into the kitchen. I oddly feel like cooking breakfast and this is a strange feeling for me. I don't even know where to begin. I end up spending more than an hour trying to figure out how to make scrambled eggs until I come to the conclusion that I should just make bacon. Nothing else. Just bacon.

"What are you doing?" I look up and see Sugar squinting at me in her sleepy state.

"Cooking," I tell her and she frowns. She walks up to the trash and eyes it.

"What the hell is that?"

"My attempt at making eggs. But I decided to just quit because one, I have no idea how you do it and two, we ran out." I shrug while turning back to my bacon and flipping it.

"But I just bought those! Like yesterday! You managed to go through all of them?" she suddenly wakes up and is more aware of what's happening.

"Yea sorry about that. But I'm making bacon! We could eat bacon. Although I don't know how to make rice so we can just eat bacon. This seems easy enough. Damn, cooking is fun." I laugh and just then one of the pieces of bacon pops and a huge chunk of oil from the pan flies straight to my forearm, "WHAT THE FUCK! HELL NO!" I yell and back away quickly from the evil that is the stove. I shove the cooking utensil at Sugar, "DONE. I'M DONE."

She laughs loudly at me and I glare at her before rubbing my arm to sooth the searing pain. Fuck this shit man, who the hell _wants_to get burned on a daily basis?

"Okay just sit down and calm down. I'll cook it. I have work in a couple of hours, might as well use my time to tend to your every need right?" she tells me sarcastically and I nod like she should be serious. She walks up to the stove and continues to cook my bacon. When she turns around she eyes me up and down cautiously, "Are you going to be okay today?"

I raise my eyebrow in confusion, "Why? I'm fully capable of taking care of myself," I see her smirk, "Just as long as you leave me food in the fridge, I'll be fine."

"I'm just making sure. I didn't know if you're okay, from last night..."

"Oh." That's right, I was stood up. I look down at my hands, "I'm fine. We talked last night and it was really great. I know you want to protect me and all but maybe we should just keep this between me and you? There's no need to tell Quinn-"

I look up and my eyes widen, "Seriously Mami?" To my surprise when I looked up, I find Sugar with her phone already to her ear, calling Quinn no doubt. I reach my hand out for her to give me her phone and she sighs before doing so.

"I told her yesterday when you didn't come back home. I just wanted to update her." Sugar tells me as an apology. I roll my eyes and put the phone to my ear.

"Hey Sugar. Did she come back home?" Quinn answers.

"Hey." I mutter back.

"Santana? Are you okay? Sugar told me what happened."

"Yea I'm fine. I called Brittany when I got home and we talked it out. Everything's fine." I walk out of the kitchen and go straight for my armchair, plopping down sideways.

"Did she at least explain? I know you how much effort you put into it Santana. You're not the type to just let things like this go." She tells me annoyingly. She was right though. I wasn't the type to pursue if it seemed like I was getting nowhere. But after last night I didn't feel that why. Brittany actually opened up to me and told me about herself.

"No, she didn't explain." I breathe out, realizing that fact. But then again I never asked. "But we did talk about the fact that we both like each other, a lot." I don't stop the smile tugging its way to my lips.

"Santana I don't know if it's a good idea to get involved with someone who is still in the closet. Not saying you should push her out, because we all know that's not the right thing to do. All I'm saying is maybe for _you_, it's not the healthiest choice."

"I'm not choosing between broccoli and cream cheese Quinn." I laugh.

"You know what I mean. Through your experiences, you learned to be out, and proud, and not care what anyone thinks. Those people that hurt you made you become who you are now. Dating someone who isn't on that same level is like taking a step back."

"She is though." I sigh, "On the same level I mean. We talked last night and I found out that she doesn't even talk to her mom anymore. Plus all her friends know she's gay so she's not in the closet."

"So who the hell is this 'mama' person?" she questions and I'm really started to get irritated.

"I don't know." I tell her firmly. I just want her to drop it.

"Santana," she tries again.

"I don't fucking know okay? But I'm not just going to pry into her goddamn life and make her tell me. When she's ready she'll tell me but for now, I just need to let this shit go. It's not fucking helping and you guys making out to be something it isn't, isn't helping either."

"If she won't tell you who this woman is then at least let her meet Sugar. If anyone can decipher between a human being and a manipulative bitch, it's Sugar. Make them meet, let Sugar work her magic and if it's all clear, I'll step back. You won't hear another word from me."

"You wanna put that in writing?" I tease her.

"Shut up. I'm serious, put her to the Sugar test. _If _she passes, I'll leave her alone."

"Fine. You better be fucking serious Fabray. _When _she passes, which she will, I don't wanna hear your shit anymore."

"Santana, I'm just worried about you. You're my best friend. I can't have you crying over a broken heart for another two more years."

"Fuck you, I wasn't crying over it for two years."

"Yea okay." She tells me in a voice laced with sarcasm. "You would burst into tears every time someone even mentioned Tay-"

"Don't fucking say it." I warn her.

"See what I mean?"

"Not because I'm going to cry, but because I might get the urge to fly over there and slap you. And I really don't have the money for that right now."

"Whatever. I know you're already over her. So why can't I just say it?"

"Because I fucking said so. I don't care if I'm over that bitch. I still don't want to hear her name, EVER."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Let me know when she fails."

"Fuck you."

* * *

I lean back into my office chair and sigh. For some reason, I thought that taking a open shift at work would help me get my mind off things. Specifically things named 'Brittany'. I was so wrong. I hate to admit it but my phone conversation with Quinn earlier had planted seeds of doubt in my mind. Ugly disgusting seeds that decided to torture me for the past five hours.

_"Hello? Are you still there?" _the man on the phone spoke up. I roll my eyes and twirl my pencil between my fingers.

"Yes, sorry sir, our phone system seems to be acting up." I plant my heels onto my desk and lean further back, bringing my hands behind my head. I can't help but think that I probably look super badass right now. "I'm sure if you called some time tomorrow it should be all cleared up by then."

_"But-" _I don't wait for him to finish and end the call by pressing the small button on my headset.

I hate my job. I really do. The only reason I'm staying in this hell hole is because it's easy and I get to sit in an airconditioned room. Being a telemarketer has it's perks though. Like on days that I'm feeling especially bitchy, I could manipulate pretty much anyone to do whatever I say.

One time, I got some rich lady to buy a club membership for every male in her family. I just fed her some lame lines about it being listed as one of the most desired Christmas presents that men secretly wish for. Bitch turned to putty in my hands. She bought seven lifetime memberships and three new golf club sets. I don't even remember which sets she bought. When she asked for my opinion, I just whipped out my makeshift spin wheel that I created just for that reason. I even decorated it one day when I was bored. It had the top five most expensive golf club sets that our country club sold. I just flick the pointer and wherever it lands, I work my magic to get it sold.

My bosses love me for it though. I could pretty much get away with doing whatever I wanted on most days. Then there's day where Rick works. Days like today. I hate today.

"Santana, could you get me a cup of coffee? Hold the spit this time." Rick's voice booms from my phone intercom.

I push myself away from my desk so that I'm just outside of my cubicle. I look out just in time to see Rick pouring out his last cup of coffee into the fake plant outside his office. What a dick.

"I fucking hate you..." I mutter under my breath. I slide back to my desk and reach into the bottom drawer for the little baggy I filled earlier with crushed laxatives. Maybe 'little' isn't the right word, it was more like ziplock bag sized.

When I get back to my desk I laugh quietly to myself thinking about Rick dying on the toilet later. I don't even care how much I put in his damn coffee, all I know is that I need to buy more because I'm all out. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure I smashed the whole bottle in that bag and I only used it on Rick once before.

I lean back on my seat and my feet resume it's previous position, rightfully resting on all my work papers. I strain to reach for my cell phone on my desk and curse at myself for not grabbing it before making myself comfortable.

I unlock my phone and see that I got a new text.

_[B:] Work is soooo boring! Why didn't anyone ever warn me about Dr. Pepper not being a DENTIST!?_

I stifle a laugh and sit forward before standing slightly to glance around, checking if anyone was coming my way. Thankfully, nobody gives two shits today, except Rick of course, so it's pretty much a chill work day. I glance at the time, I only have an hour or so before I can get out here and I sure as hell don't mind spending it texting Brittany. I sit back down and send her a quick text back.

_[S:] Is that seriously why you got a job working at a dentist office? Shouldn't you be filing papers or something right now?_

_[B:] Don't mock me Santana. And shouldn't you be seducing rich wallets right now?_

_[S:] Okay then. I'll talk to you later._

_[B:] WAIT! NO! SAVE ME! please... I'm dying... D:_

_[S:] Haha Britt, you're not dying. I'll be happy to save you. When do you get off?_

_[B:] Usually when I have time. Mostly at night. You?_

_[S:] … What?_

_[B:] What?_

_[S:] Umm..._

_[B:] OH! I get off at 5pm._

_[S:] omg..._

_[B:] Yeah... disregard the last few texts... It never happened. In fact, let's just go ahead and delete them._

_[S:] And by delete do you mean save? Because I totally just did that ;P_

_[B:] You are no longer in my 'text when bored at work and needs saving' list :(_

_[S:] Well you officially just landed the top spot on my list :D_

_[B:] You're such a meanie :(_

_[S:] Haha, I'm sorry Britt. I'll make it up to you. I'll take you out after? I finish at 5 too._

_[B:] I can't D: I gotta go home after. I'm behind on a lot of my school work and I told myself that I'd do it tonight. Maybe tomorrow? We could go out before going to study group?_

_[S:] I can't make it to study group this week. I'm volunteering at the high school again._

_[B:] But that's in the afternoon. You haven't come the last couple weeks too._

_[S:] I just feel so exhausted afterwards that's why._

_[B:] The guys really miss you._

_[S:] I know. I miss them too._

_[B:] I miss you..._

I smile sadly at the words on my phone screen. She wants me to say it, and I don't even have to think twice before pressing send.

_[S:] B, I miss you the most._

* * *

I walk into my living room and instantly see the form of a little girl sitting on my armchair watching TV. Sugar looks up from the other couch and smiles. I put my finger to my lips, silently giving her an understanding look. She nods and turns her head back to the book she was reading, but her eyes moved slyly to the little girl across of her, the knowing smile still present.

When I reach the back of the chair I jump forward and bring my hands to tickle the little monster. She lets out a yelp in surprise but then finds my face and tries to get away.

"You can't get away from the tickle dinosaur!" I yell at her and she collapses even further into the chair. Her laughing grows louder and she starts kicking and flailing her arms around. Sugar on the other hand is laughing along and almost topples over the edge of the couch.

"Tana! S-stop! I s-surrender!" the little girl begs and I let go of her. She takes a few seconds to catch her breath. I take that time to move around the armchair and sit next to Sugar on the couch. When the little one finally sits back upright, she looks at Sugar and I. A very familiar sly grin present on her lips. She jumps towards us and Sugar and I brace ourselves for the impact by grabbing on to each other and ducking into the safety of the couch.

"Now you let out the ORIGINAL tickle dinosaur!" Sugar screams and we soon become assaulted by little hands attacking at our sides.

"Okay okay I surrender!" I yell back and she stops her attacks on us. She jumps back with a content smile and starts to sway from side to side, her hands clasping each other in front of her.

"Hi Auntie Tana" she tells me and I smile back at her. I reach forward a rustle her hair on top making her scrunch up her nose in protest.

"Hey Valerie." I smirk.

"That's not my name!" she puts her hands on her hips and frowns. It was so cute that I almost gave in, almost. I loved calling her Valerie, it matched her perfectly, and her smooth red hair constantly reminded me of one of my favorite songs.

"I know, but to me, you're always gonna be my little Val." I smile sweetly at her.

"Alright sweetie, you got to see Santana, time for you to go home." Sugar stands now, holding out her hand to the little one.

"Aww but she just got here! You said we could watch an episode of Dora when she got home!" Valerie steps back, away from Sugar and shakes her head.

"I know baby, I'm sorry but she came home later than expected and you need to go home. I wasn't even supposed to take you out today." Sugar tries again.

"But you promised!"

I look at the little girl in front of me. How did she get so attached to me after only a couple of months? Sugar was just her babysitter, and I've only hung out with them a few times a week. I see her almost starting to cry and I look back at Sugar, her eyes begging me to help. I sit down with my legs crossed in front of the little girl. She turns to me and wipes away what would've been the first tear to fall.

"Hey, don't be sad, I promise we'll hang out another time okay?" I grab her little hand and give it a light squeeze. She pulls back and crosses her arms over her chest.

"I'm not sad. I'm tough, like you." she puts a hard expression on her face and I can tell that she's forcing it.

"I know you're tough," I laugh, "but tough people have to listen to their elders too. Sugar is your elder, so you have to listen to her okay?" I reach and untangle her arms, she lets me and drops them to her side.

"Okay" she breathes out and turns to Sugar, "I'm sorry."

I look at Sugar and smile. She returns it with a nod, telling me thank you. I turn back to the little girl and bring my hand up between us, making a fist.

"Nos vemos luego?" [See you later?] I ask her. Her face brightens and she brings her tiny hand up to mine, curling her fingers to mimic my hand and fist bumps me.

"Hasta luego." she tries and I giggle at her attempt at Spanish. I have to admit, she is getting better though. I'll have a little mini me in no time. She'll just be barely two years old with pale skin and red hair.

We hug before I get up from the ground and Sugar and I watch as the small girl packs all her toys and books into her little bag. It was a rule that if she's the one that played with it, she's the one that puts it away. She didn't seem to mind though. Apparently it was her mom's rule so she must be used to it.

Sugar did tell me that her mom warned her about the pout though. Every once in a while, if she wasn't feeling up to cleaning, she would try to pout her way out of it and damn was it hard to say no. Luckily, the little one hadn't mastered it to its full extent so it made it easier for us to say no.

"We'll talk when we get home." Sugar tells me before walking out of the living room with the tiny girl holding her hand. I swallow dryly because I know what she wants to talk about. Brittany.

"Sure."

And they left.

* * *

"I talked to Quinn today." Sugar sits on the couch with her cup of cocoa.

"Okay." I staring blankly at the television. It was off but I didn't care.

"She told me about the Sugar Test." Sugar says as she stares at the television too.

"And?" I shift uncomfortably in my armchair to make sure to avoid eye contact.

"I'll only do it if you're sure." she turns and ducks her head to look at me with question eyes.

"I am. She's amazing. I need you guys to know that. None of you have even meet her yet but they all seem to already be judging her." I think back to Quinn and Rachel. Sure, I never let Rachel get in two words about the matter but I know what she's thinking. It's the same as Quinn.

"She stood you up for Valentine's Day San. What do you expect them to think?"

"So what if she did? You don't seem to care that she did it. So why do they have to be so hard on her?"

"Because they don't see how happy she makes you. They're so far away and they only see you every once in a while. They're worried about you. I see you every day though, I see that stupid smile you get when she texts you, or that stupid happy dance you do when you wake up every Wednesday. How sad you get when you can't go on your study dates-"

"It's not a date. We never had a first date _yet._But it's gonna be soon, I just have to plan the perfect thing. I know she's planning something too though, so I need to come up with something amazing fast." I lose my train of thought and quickly get pulled into thoughts of blonde hair and blue eyes.

"See what I mean? They don't see this everyday like I do. They're just being protective parents right now." Sugar kicks my shin and I snap out of my dream state. I scowl at her choice of words.

"Eww. Quinn and Rachel are NOT my parents."

"Well they _are _your best friends, so deal with it."

I stare at my hands for a couple of minutes and Sugar seems to know I'm struggling to say something but can't seem to voice it just yet.

"What's wrong babe?" She asks me while getting up and sitting on the armrest of my chair.

"What if- What if she doesn't pass... your test?" I ask softly. She shifts next to me and presses her lips to my temple. Her arms wrap around my shoulders and I sink into her.

"She will." She says softly and I can feel her smile against my forehead.

"I just want to know so much more about her you know? I don't want to push her too hard to telling me everything. I don't want to scare her."

"She'll tell you eventually Santana. Just be patient. Do you think she's worth it?"

I nod.

"Then just wait. You may not know everything now, but one day when you do, it won't matter. You know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you're already in love with her," she winks at me and gives me a knowing smirk.

"Sugar, I don't know if I am-"

"You are. Don't fight it."

* * *

I walk across the field to the familiar sounds of cheers and counting. I've been volunteering my services at this high school in my area for a few weeks now. God knows they needed it though because from the first moment I pulled up into the parking lot and saw them on the field I knew this was going to be a challenge.

"Ms. Lopez!" one of the young boys on the cheer team jump up and wave when he sees me getting closer.

"Daniel, I told you to stop calling me that." I glare at him. He smiles and shrugs and I return the smile. I told them from day one to just call me Santana and they all agreed but him.

"Well when you stop calling me Daniel and start calling me _SexyD_, I'll call you whatever you want." He winked back. Although he was on the cheer team, I'm almost one hundred percent positive that he only joined to serve as a base for stunts. I roll my eyes and turn to face the whole squad.

"Alright line up!"

A few students jump to their feet but some groan loudly before stepping into place. I see Daniel quirk his head to the side, focused on something behind me. I figure he's probably checking out some of the girls running on the track. He raises his hand with a smile.

"What now?" I yell at him and he bites his bottom lip.

"There's a really hot girl walking towards you…" he says as he points behind me. I whip my head back to see who could possibly be interrupting our practice. My eyes fall on yes, a _very _hot girl walking towards me. A very hot girl named Brittany. She smiles and I try to hide my excitement.

Okay, I need to keep this cool. I can't have the students thinking I'm soft. I run my fingers through my hair quickly. When she reaches me I take in the sight of her whole body, looking at her from bottom to top. She's in skinny jeans and a loose tank top, arms behind her back and her hair falling onto perfect shoulders. I get to her face and notice her frowning, making me do the same.

"What's wrong?" I ask her. Her frown deepens and she steps closer, bringing one of her hands from around her back up to my face. Before I can question her, she lightly brushes her fingertips against my jaw and then up to my cheek bone.

"Is it sore?" she whispers. I lean into her touch until her hand is cupping my cheek completely. She's worried about my bruises. They've healed quite a bit but she still noticed them. I shake my head softly and she rubs her thumb against my skin.

"I'm sorry." She tells me.

"Stop saying that." I roll my eyes, "Not that I don't want you here, but why are you here?" her hand never leaves my face and it makes me instinctively bring my hands to her hips, holding her there.

"I wanted to properly apologize for Friday, and I couldn't wait till Monday. I needed to see you and I knew you would be here so I came by before heading to Joel's Diner. So…" she brings her other arm around from behind her, revealing a single lily flower, "I'm sorry Santana."

"Britt…" I take the flower in my hand, "You already sent me flowers. A lot of flowers. You don't need to give me another." I laugh and she shrugs, dropping her hand from my face now. I missed the warmth instantly.

"Yeah but those were _sent_ to you. I personally _gave _this one to you." She smiles.

"Thank you." I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her into a hug as she wraps her arms around my neck.

"You sure you can't come to study after?" she whispers into my hair.

"Someone needs to whip these kids into shape Britt. I'm gonna be too tired to go after this."

She pulls away and locks her hand on the nape of my neck. I can't help but think that this feels almost too intimate. When did we reach this point? Was it when we confessed to the fact that we both felt the same way?

"We have an audience." She smiles and motions her head towards the students behind me. I roll my eyes before turning my head back to yell. Brittany catches on and is quick to stop me, grabbing my head and turning it back to her. "I was just leaving anyways." She leans in and my eyes widen.

"Britt what are y-"

She grins and turns my head slightly before pressing her lips to my cheek, almost barely hitting the corner of my lips.

"I'll see you Monday, Santana." She says and she let go of me completely.

I stand still with my hands still in front of me like I was still holding on to her hips. When I realize that she's pretty much halfway across the field by now I awkwardly drop my arms to my side. I hear a few students giggling behind me and I whip my body around. After all my hard work in building up my badass reputation, here comes Brittany to make me out to be a big mess of gush.

"Damn Lopez, never took you for a bottom." Daniel wiggles his eyebrows and my face hardens.

"Anyone who can't say that they have a hotter girlfriend than _that,_" I point my thumb behind me, "does fifteen laps." I smirk back at them.

"That's not fair Santana! I don't have a girlfriend, I have a boyfriend!" one of the girls nearly screams. All the other girls nod their heads simultaneously. They all had boyfriends.

"Girls," I hold up my finger to silence them, "Think about your man," I pause to let them picture their significant others in their heads, "Now look at Brittany." I turn around to see the figure of a retreating blonde turn at the same time to wave goodbye and blow a kiss that almost makes me forget my point in the first place. I turn back to the wide eyed students, "Fifteen laps."

* * *

Brittany POV.

Today will be our first date.

I skipped my last class to catch the bus back home and grab my car. I need to be back at school by four. I was surprising Santana today. Today was the day. I didn't want to hold back anymore. I want to tell her everything and nothing all at once. And I needed her to know how she makes me feel.

I made sure to check what she was wearing in the morning, thankfully, she had dressed casually. When she teased me for '_staring at her outfit_' I blushed, because that's exactly what I was doing. Although it didn't stop me from taking the time to appreciate her figure, everything from the curves of her body to the curves of her lips. I was already caught for it so might as well right?

I take out my phone to text Eric, making sure everything was set up and it would be perfect. He texted back telling me to shut up and relax. My phone vibrated in my palm and I let out a smile before answering.

"Hello?" I speak into my phone with a smile. I knew she would call.

"Hey Britt, where are you? The bus is going to be here soon. Did you get lost again? I drew you that map remember?" Santana asks me. I roll my eyes and click my tongue, this girl seriously has no faith in me.

"I didn't get lost butthead. I'm in the parking lot. Come meet me? I had to grab something from a friend's car. Do I need to draw you a map or are you gonna be okay?" I hear her chuckle and it makes me smile again.

"Okay truce. I just didn't know where you were. Which parking lot?"

"The one closest to our bus stop, the car is in front of that really old building. The one I can't pronounce." I tell her in a lowered voice so that the passing students to don't hear and make fun of me. Santana giggles and tells me she's coming now. We hang up and I lean back onto the front of my car. I wait for a few minutes and I finally see Santana walking up to me with a few books in her hands.

"Where's your friend?" she questions after realizing that we were alone. She looks behind me at the car I'm leaning on and her eyebrow rises slightly, "Isn't this the same car you have Britt?"

"Mhmm." I nod. She looks back at me and her questioning face deepens. I grab my keys from my pocket and jingle them in front of her, "Come on."

* * *

"Where are we going?" Santana sits up and looks out her passenger window. I glance at her and I can tell she was lost. I let out a tiny giggle and she whips her head back to throw me a glare.

"You've been living in Hawaii for two years now and you still haven't been to this side of the island?" I shake my head.

"I don't really like to venture out…" she says as she leans forward to take in her surroundings. The sky was getting darker and the streetlights began to turn on.

"Well I guess that works out perfectly for me." I smile at the road.

"Why's that?" she asks me.

"Because now I know you haven't been there before."

"Why would that matter Britt?" she pushes further. I look back at her and smile.

"Because I want our _official _first date to be special." I tell her like it's the most obvious thing ever. She doesn't question me after that. She looked surprised for a split second, but then quickly covered up with a smile.

I turn up a residential street from the main road and chance a glance back to Santana. I know she's lost, and I know she's trying her hardest to guess where we're going. It was so cute to see her shifting in her seat, looking around the area to get a hint. I turn into a couple more streets and we find ourselves surrounded by more and more houses until we reach the top of a dead end street.

"I really hope you're not taking me to a house party as a first date." She asks me seriously and I laugh, shaking my head.

I park my car close enough to our destination and turn to face Santana. "Ready?" I ask her.

"For what?" she raises her eyebrow.

"We should go before it gets too dark to see." I avoid her question, giving her more questions with what I said. Before she can say anything I get out of my seat and close my door. I walk around and open Santana's door, letting her step out, and close it. I go to my trunk and grab two small flashlights and the sweater I keep in there.

"Here, you might get cold." I hand her the sweater and she takes it hesitantly, making me laugh again. "Don't be so nervous," I grab her hand to pull her closer, "Do you trust me?" I ask her and she nods slowly. I take the sweater back and hold the bottom open. She gets the hint and puts her arms inside, letting me lift it up and over her head. When I pull the sweater down over her torso, I let my hands find her waist and rest it there.

"Thanks" she blushes. She looks around at the surrounding houses and then back at me, "Can I at least know where we're going?"

I think about it for a couple of seconds, "Everyone calls it a different name," she nods, urging me to continue, "It's mostly known as Spitting Caves though." I catch a hint of a smile form on her lips and I grin. "You've heard of it."

"I've always wanted to go but I never knew how to get there…" she lets her thoughts trail and we stand like that for a little longer.

I take a step back and take her hands in mine, interlocking our fingers in front of us for the first time. Her eyes find mine and I smile back at her.

"No pinkys this time?" she tilts her head.

"Not tonight." I shake my head and turn to lead her towards the opening in between two of the houses. The sun is minutes from setting and a lot of the light is mostly blocked by the trees over the pathway down so it's hardly visible.

I knew it would be, that's why I brought the small flashlights. I turn mine on and Santana does the same. We make our way down the trail, hand in hand. I take the lead when the trail becomes more narrow and step down a few steps, looking back every once in awhile to make sure Santana is following suit. I know I'm holding her hand, but I just need that visual reminder you know? Like this is real, and she's real.

"You got it?" I ask her squeezing her hand a little harder while helping her down a particularly hard step.

"If I slip and fall on my ass, I don't know how I'll ever forgive you for making me go on a freaking _hike _for a first date." She glares at me and I laugh.

"Stop whining," I laugh and she shines her flashlight at my face in protest.

"I'm not whining. I just didn't expect to be exerting so much energy on our first date."

"More like a second date kinda girl?" I tease and she blushes. "It's not much of a hike, I promise it'll be worth it. We're nearly there."

We take the last couple of steps and when my feet hit the smooth rock, I look up. Santana makes her way down and stands beside me, her breath evening out just in time for her to lose it completely at the sight in front of us.

The sky was orange and the way it dimly light the ocean made it almost magical. I could hear the waves crashing against the rocks more clearly now, and I can taste the salt in the air. Every few seconds, you could see water come up from the edge where the waves would crash into it.

"Britt..." she breathes finally.

"I know right."

"This is amazing." she whispers and lets go of my hand to walk closer to the edge. I stand there and watch her. Something about seeing her on that edge in the last minutes of a sunset, makes my heart ache, but in a good way. The kind of way that makes me want to freeze time and stay in this exact moment forever.

"Mondays are the best day to come here." I walk up beside her and sit at the edge, letting my feet dangle below. "It's usually crowded on weekends. I've found that Mondays are the days almost no one comes."

"How often are you here?" she asks and sits next to me.

"Anytime I can find a moment to myself. I'm usually so busy so I haven't been coming recently." I look behind us at a few of the houses that overlook this beautiful view. I see a couple of familiar figures walk up to one of the balcony's and I turn around quickly, before Santana can catch on.

We both find our comfortable silence again as we watch the sun disappear under the ocean. It gets dark fast and the splashing waves lightly shower us. We weren't at the very edge though. We would have to climb down some more to get to that point.

"So is this how all your first dates go?" she laughs, "Next thing I know, music is going to start playing and it'll be really corny and cheesy." she laughs louder and my eyes widen. She sees it and stops laughing, "Oh my God Britt, you weren't gonna play music were you?" she asks and my cheeks flush a deep red.

I snap my head back towards the pathway we came from and look up at the balcony of the house there. I quickly grab my flashlight and as I'm fumbling with it, the sounds of soft music floats towards us.

"Oh my god..." Santana slowly turns around towards the music. My finger finds the button on the flashlight and I shine it straight into the balcony, clicking it on and off a couple of times.

"Shit," I curse under my breath and click it a couple more times. The figure of a person comes up to the railing and I roll my eyes.

"How many was that? I can't remember which meant louder and which meant off!" Eric yells.

"OFF! TURN IT OFF ERIC!" I yell back and I swear to god, I just died from embarrassment.

"LOUDER!?" he yells again.

"Oh my god..." I drop my head and I sigh. I hear Santana laughing so I turn back around and find her leaning back with one arm behind her holding herself up and the other on her stomach. She's not even holding back. I pout and she wipes away a few tears to look at me.

"I'm sorry," she tries to sit back up, "That was so awesome." I deepen my pout and she smiles, "Don't pout, it was cute. I promise, not corny and cheesy at all."

"This is so embarrassing," I shake my head, "annnd now he's playing it louder..."

"How can you be this cute?" she asks me and shifts her body closer to mine. She grabs my arm and moves it so that she can cuddle up to my side. I giggle and wrap my arm around her, pulling her in even closer.

"Not corny?" I ask and she chuckles softly.

"Not at all." she rests her head in the crook of my neck. "So Eric lives up there? He must be fucking banking to afford that shit."

"Yeah, he bought it about a year ago. We mostly use it as a party house." I try my hardest to sound cool and nonchalant about it.

"Really Britt, do you really?" she gives me a knowing smirk. Of course she knows I'm not the party girl type.

"Okay that was a lie. We don't party. We aren't cool enough for that kind of thing. Throwing a party and only having like five people isn't really a party. It's more like, friends going to your house to play Mahjong. Plus I hardly drink, Devin and Eric usually drink the most."

"Well maybe I could come to one of your _parties_ one day? Although, I don't play Mahjong… You might need to teach that one to me."

"It's really fun. We should team up though because I could never beat Devin on my own." I say and let out a little pout. She sees it and laughs, bringing her finger to my lips to push it back to normal. I smile and pretend to bite her finger.

"You know," she pauses and sits up straight to face me, "I kind of indirectly called you my girlfriend yesterday… It was at the cheerleading practice. I'm sorry. I don't know why I said it. It made me look super badass though…" she blushes, "I could take it back, I shouldn't have said it."

"Santana it's okay." I grab her hand and squeeze it, "You don't have to apologize for saying I'm your girlfriend."

"Oh. Okay. Sorry."

"Stop saying sorry."

"Sorry." she whispers and I roll my eyes again.

I look at the girl in front of me. Santana. She's everything I could've ever asked for. I want to be that for her. I feel like I _need_ to be that for her. And I can be. I will be. I know that no matter what, she will accept me for me. But taking that step into an actual relationship means that I'll be opening myself up to something huge. Something that I can't ignore, or push aside, or leave in the dark. I'll need to open myself up to her, which only means that I'll need to tell her everything.

"I want you to be my girlfriend." I tell her. "But I need to make sure you understand something first."

She looks into my eyes. Her dark brown turns a shade darker and I can tell she's scared.

"That day that you were sick… and I got that phone call," I hold our stare and her eyes flash with recognition. "Whatever you think that was, it's not… I'm not… I didn't have to lie. I don't know why I did but I did. I'm sorry if it made you think something about me. I just need you to know that it wasn't some girlfriend or boyfriend or wife or husband calling. Because I would never do that."

Her eyes stay strong and I soon worry that she doesn't believe me. I could tell she was still hesitant, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was.

"Who's mama?" she asks softly. My eyes widen at the name. How does she know about mama? "I sort of… checked your phone when you were sleeping that day. I thought it was your mom at first so I didn't think too much about it. But after Friday night, after you told me all those things about how you don't even talk to you mom anymore, I don't know. Is she like someone important to you? No one seems to talk about her around me. Is she someone to hide?"

I break our stare and close my eyes. This just got a whole lot more complicated. I wasn't going to introduce her to mama for another couple of months. Until I knew for sure that this was real.

"Santana, I can't tell you about mama yet." I breathe out and open my eyes. She looks down immediately, "I'm so sorry, but please believe me, she's just a friend. I promise you, she's just a friend."

She looks up and blinks away a few tears. She wants to be let in. She wants it more than anything, and I just shut her out, again. I grab her face between my hands and lean in and I do what I set out to do from this morning.

I tell her everything and nothing. I press my lips to hers and I hear her whimper. I hold her there, telling her everything I couldn't say with words. It was sweet and soft and soon she began to lean in, wanting more. I move my hand to the back of her neck and scratch at her hairline. Her hands find their way to just above my hips and she squeezes. Our lips begin to move together and in sync.

I pull away slightly and I feel her lips frown making me giggle into another kiss. I give her a few quick pecks before resting on each other's foreheads.

"I'm so yours, proudly so." I whisper against her lips. She smiles and pulls me in for another kiss.

"WOOOOHOOOO!" a group of idiots start hollering at us and we both turn to glare at them. Ryan, Eric, Joel and Devin are all leaning against the railing, throwing out cat calls and idiotic noises.

"I can't believe you asked them, of all people to help you with this." Santana laughs.

"That's what I get for having them as best friends I guess." I shrug and stand up, taking a step back from the ledge. I bend down and grab the flashlight that was next to me. I aim it at the boys, flashing it on and off exactly five times. They quickly disappear.

"What was that?" she asks me and I turn back to her and hold out my hand for her to grab.

"Dance with me?"

"Are you serious?"

"I am." I smile and she takes my hand allowing me to pull her to her feet. The smooth sound of a slow tempo song starts and I take the lead. We didn't dance any particular dance. We just swayed really. But it was peaceful, and perfect.

* * *

I pull up to Santana's house and put my car in park. I didn't want the night to be over and neither did she. She lets go of my hand to grab her schoolbag from the back seat. When everything is settled, she sits still in her seat. She wants to say something.

"Come inside?" She says quietly, "My roommate should be coming home any time now, but I just kinda want to spend more time with you."

"I'd love to but I should really head home." I tell her regretfully. "Plus I don't really know your roommate and I don't want to leave a bad first impression. You know, me taking you out on a date instead of taking you home to do homework. I'm a pretty bad influence." I try to make light of the situation.

"Okay." She pauses again. I have a feeling that this has more to do with meeting her roommate than it does me coming inside. "You will meet her though right? I want you to meet her. She's the closest thing I have to family here and it would mean a lot." She tells me. I knew it.

"Yes Santana," I grab her hand again, "I'd love to meet her. Just tell me when, and what she likes. So I can come with about fifty of them to insure that she likes me."

"She'll love you Britt. Don't worry about it." She says but it almost sounds like she's telling it to herself.

"Okay, go on. Before she comes home and sees me prematurely. I don't have fifty of whatever she likes yet."

She smiles at me and leans in. I meet her halfway and cup her cheeks with my hands. I seriously love those cheeks. I run my finger across her skin for a second until our lips touch and it send shivers down my spine for the second time tonight.

She pulls away first and I hold back a whine. She mimics my hands and cups my face, turning me slightly to kiss me on the cheek, "So can I officially call you my girlfriend now?" she blushes.

I blush with her and do what she did, kissing her on the cheek too, "Officially, official." I whisper back.

* * *

I turn my key in the door and push it open slowly, not wanting to make any noise. I see the light on in my living room so that's where I go first. When I turn the corner, I see the familiar figure spewed out on my couch. Of course she's sleeping. I roll my eyes and make my way to the edge by her face.

"Mama, wake up." I whisper, pushing some hair behind her ear. She stirs for a bit until her eyes open slightly and try to focus.

"Hey babe," her sleepy voice still intact, "You're home late."

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the late update. I've been really trying to write as much as I can when I can but I never seem to get it done in time. My beta/most awesome person ever has been yelling at me every day so far to get it done. So don't worry, he's got your guys' backs haha.**

**Thank you for all the feedback. I love hearing your opinions. Shout out to ****naynay1963, your review gave me the idea for the Quinn phone call. It never even crossed my mind that that would happen. Thanks! I seriously love all of you.**

**ALSO! Today is Election Day. GO VOTE! It's still night time here so I'm either waking up extra early to go vote, or I'm just gonna stay up the rest of the night and read fanfics like usual until it hits 7am. Oh fangirl problems…**


	8. Questions

**AN: Don't give up on Brittany just yet my loves. Have faith :)**

Santana POV

* * *

Chapter 8: Questions

It's been a few weeks since Brittany and I became official. Sugar was happy to hear the news, along with Brittany's friends. Quinn and Rachel on the other hand, not so much. Well more so Quinn. Rachel just wanted to meet her and make sure that she knew enough about Broadway to be considered 'worthy'.

"Look hobbit, I know you're kinda like a freak. Don't get me wrong, I accept that about you. But you're going to have to calm the hell down if you want to meet Brittany okay?" I tell her over the phone.

I ignored her first ten calls before I realized that she wouldn't give up until I answered. She even tried to Skype call me earlier but I sent her a text telling her that I was worried my laptop screen would break soon if her face kept appearing on it.

"Santana, I just want to make sure she knows at least the BASICS. Did she ever even mention anything about Broadway… at all?" she asks me.

"Does it matter? I don't care if she hates the thing. It's not like _you're _the one dating her. Why should I care?" I lie down on my bed and move Stranger, making his dinosaur leg my pillow.

"It matters because it matters to me." She finalizes. "Believe it or not Santana, but people don't really get along with me very easily."

"OH TRUST ME, I believe it."

"Be quiet. If you're going to date this girl, she's going to need to get along with me. I will not be shut out of this family because your girlfriend can't stand listening to my rendition of 'Don't Rain On My Parade' or 'Defying Gravity'. I won't have it."

"Rachel, she's already listened to your horrid singing. She's not dead, nor is she begging to be dead. I think you'll get along just fine." I roll my eyes.

"She's already listened to me?" she asks hesitantly. "How?"

I sit up as I realize what I just revealed. Crap, Rachel's never going to forget this now.

"Oh. She was fooling around on my laptop and found my old Glee Club songs." I try to brush it off as nothing.

"You still have them saved?" she asks in a clearly adoring voice. Damn it.

"I don't know. I guess so. They were probably in some old folder somewhere." I try again.

"But they're there. So you must have kept them all this time."

"Yeah I guess. Whatever, it doesn't matter. I'm gonna go now." I need to end this conversation. Like right now.

"Wait hold on." I hear shuffling, "H-hello?"

"Quinn?" I recognize her voice.

"Santana? Rachel, god damn it woman! At least warn me before shoving the phone to my face! I was scared it was my mom!" I roll my eyes when I hear Rachel apologize in the background.

"Did you just get home or something?" I ask her.

"Yeah." She pauses, "How's things with blondie?"

"_Brittany, _is fine. Thanks for asking." I know Quinn is my best friend and all, but sometimes she just does these things that make me want to punch her in the face.

"I know you don't want to talk about her with me, and I'm sorry that I'm so reluctant to like her, but I actually do care about how it's going." She sighs and I believe her.

"I know Quinn. Can you at least stop calling her blondie? I hate it. It makes me want to thrust kick you every time you say it."

"Fine, I'll say her name. How's _Brittany_? Anything new?" She asks and I know what she wants. She wants to know if she's opened up anymore.

"Even if there was something new, why would I tell you? She tells me these things because she _trusts_me. She doesn't know you, so it's none of your business. It's not my place to tell you her life story." I spit back into my phone.

"Okay first off, WOW. I was just asking if anything new happened in your _relationship_. And second, it became my business the moment you decided to date some girl you just met not two months ago, and you know absolutely _nothing_about her."

"Fuck off Fabray."

"When is she going to do the Sugar test? Did you at least ask her if she'd meet Sugar?"

"Yes I fucking asked her. She already agreed. We've just been really busy with studying for midterms lately." I tell her.

"Studying or _studying_?" she asks me seriously.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I know you're like a teenage horn dog. I'm surprised you're not getting your mack on right now. Isn't it almost dinner time over there? I know how restless you get with no orgasm before dinner." She teases and I scoff at her stupidity.

"I'll have you know that Britt and I haven't had sex yet. She made a stupid rule and now I have to control myself. It doesn't stop me from making out with her though."

"She made a rule? About what?" she asks.

"It doesn't matter. I just can't get my mack on so drop it."

"Hmm..."

"What?"

"I don't know. I'm really interested in meeting her now. She's actually tamed YOU, of all people. The very one who hasn't gotten it on in almost two years? I'm just surprised that you can resist it. Normally you wouldn't let a stupid rule get in the way."

I take a deep breath. She's expecting me to say some snarky comment back. I know that's what she's expecting because what I _want_ to say has already flashed through my thoughts. But that's not what I _should_say. If Brittany were next to me, she'd tell me it was too mean. I think about it for a second.

"I really like her Q." I breathe out.

"Wow," I hear her about to say something more but she pauses and laughs instead, "You're making it kind of hard to hate her right now."

* * *

"Santana-" I hear Brittany breathe into my neck and I tilt my head back to allow her more access. My elbows hit against the door behind me and my fingertips scratch at the wood underneath. I'm not allowed to use my hands. It was our only rule.

We made that rule last week when I ended up almost straddling her completely before class. I seriously hate that fucking rule right now.

"Britt, please." I beg, and she giggles. She's teasing me and she knows it. She wouldn't have started this assault on my neck from the moment we walked through my front door if she didn't. She grabs both of my wrists and holds them down, knowing that I would try to touch her.

"Time to study," she whispers in my ear as one hand moves to the back of my head and her fingers play with my hair. Just when I'm about to lean in to kiss her lips, she stops completely and walks away, swaying her hips slightly and throwing a wink back.

"You have to stop doing that. It's not fair and you know it." I whine as I push myself off the door and follow her into the living room.

"Its fun watching you squirm," she shrugs.

"Well how come you can use hands and I can't?" I frown.

"It's not my fault you can't control yourself, Santana." she shakes her finger at me and goes back to unloading her books onto the coffee table.

* * *

"San?" Brittany taps my lap.

"Hm?" I ask, my eyes never leaving the book in my hands.

"I'm bored. What you doing?" She leans into my side and looks at my book.

"Reading." I kiss her forehead and go back to reading.

"Can you read it to me?" she nestles further into my shoulder.

"I don't think you want to hear about this Britt. It's pretty boring too." I move my arm around her shoulders so that she can come closer.

"Well then let's do something fun." She turns her head to look at me and I finally look at her. I see the smirk in her eyes and I raise my eyebrow.

"Like what?" I ask her pretending like I don't know what she's thinking.

"Like this." She grabs my book that was now long forgotten, and moves it somewhere else. I don't know where, nor do I care really, because now she's straddling me. I swear she moves like a fucking cheetah.

"Brittany, we have to study…" I whisper but my hands move to her hips and begin to move her shirt up to feel skin, contradicting my words. She leans in and brushes her lips with mine softly. I close my eyes waiting for her to lean in more but when she doesn't and instead pulls away, I open them.

"No hands San." She warns and my hands leave her skin immediately with a growl. I grab at the couch cushion and she smiles contently.

She lowers her body down on top of me and I have to resist the urge to move. When she's comfortable, she brings her hands to my cheeks. She loves my cheeks. I love that she loves my cheeks.

We stare at each other for a while. Just memorizing the way our bodies look this close to each other. We've never been in this position before.

I lean forward and connect our lips. We start off slow, but then again, it always starts of slow. She presses her body harder into mine, and this time I can't stop myself from bucking my hips up. She whimpers and kisses my jaw.

"S'tana.." she breathes into my neck and I drop my head back onto the couch. "Santana… hands." Her tongue darts out between her lips and hits my pulse point. "Hands." She says again more firmly.

"I'm not using them Britt." I whine. I can't even think straight and she thinks _right now _is the time to go over our one rule?

"No-" she tries to speak again but I force my hips up and she holds back a moan by biting softly at my neck, "Oh god," she breathes, "HANDS, Santana. Use them. NOW."

So I do.

* * *

I drop her rather ungracefully onto my bedroom desk, pushing my laptop and other belongings out of the way. She grunts when she hits the hardwood. It was exactly seven seconds from the moment she lifted the rule till now. In those seven seconds I somehow managed to lift both of us off of the couch and carry her into my bedroom.

"Why am I on a desk instead of that super comfortable looking bed over there?" she asks and I move in between her legs, quickly crashing my lips with hers to silence her.

"Stranger." I barely whisper my explanation.

"Seriously Santana?" She laughs and I smile into our kiss.

"Isn't this so much hotter though?"

"Not when you think about the real reason behind it..." she moves her head back and my lips go for her jaw.

"Well how about now?" I move my hips closer between her legs and my hands go to her ass, pulling her into me at the same time. She moans and connects our lips again, kissing me like she needs more.

I feel her lips pause and I pull back. Her head perks up and my eyes fall on her neck. That fucking neck. I go straight for it and my teeth graze her skin there lightly.

"What's that noise?" Brittany asks and my mouth pauses on her neck.

"I don't hear anything Britt." I tell her and continue my assault.

"No seriously Santana, listen." We both pause again, "It sounds like… ringing." Brittany puts her hand on my shoulders to stop me and I groan into her neck. Fuck. Whatever I did in the past to deserve getting seriously blocked from sweet lady kisses, I'm fucking sorry okay. You made your point God. I will be forever nice from now on.

"I don't hear anything, babe." I whine and she grabs my face to look me in the eyes.

"Babe?" she questions with a smile. Now that I think about it that was the first time I called her by a term of endearment, did she not like it?

"I don't hear anything... _baby_?" I try again. Her smile grows but she doesn't say anything.

"Sweetie? Honey? Sex legs?" I try again and again.

"OH! I like that one! Use sex legs!" she grins.

"Okay. I don't hear anything... _Sex Legs._"

She smiles contently at my words. I see her turn her head and look around my desk, "Who is… Quinn Fabray?"

"What?" I ask her and I turn my head to look at what she's looking at. My eyes widen when I see that my Skype is attempting to video call Quinn. Shit, I must've accidentally done that when I moved it to the side.

"Santana?" Brittany looks at me again. As I reach across to try and end the call, the worst possible thing happens.

Quinn answers. That fucking bitch answers.

Just as the window pops up and my webcam turns on, I panic and grab Brittany, throwing us both to the ground and out of view. I cover her mouth with my hand when she grunts, stifling the noise quickly. I slowly move up to take a peek at my screen.

"Santana?" Quinn leans into the screen and her eyes squint. "Are you there?"

"Shit" I mutter and fix my hair and smooth down my shirt. I see Rachel walking up and sitting next to Quinn. I motion to Brittany to crawl with me to the other side of my desk. When we get there we both sit up and she lets out a tiny giggle.

"_Brittany!_" I hiss at her. She looks at me and smirks. I shake my head and pull my finger up to my lips, telling her to be quiet. Maybe Quinn will just disconnect after a while.

"Santana we can hear you moving around." Rachel deadpans and Brittany suppresses another giggle. I give Brittany a stern look before slowly moving in front of my screen.

"Hey. Sorry about that. I accidentally called you. But I'm in a hurry to leave so I'll just go ahead and hang up now." I tell them with a fake smile.

"Wait! I wanted to ask you something anyways! Plus I know you don't have to go anywhere so sit down and shut up." Quinn snaps back and I do as she says. I feel Brittany kick my shin from the side and I ignore it. I know she's laughing at me.

"I don't have all day Fabray. Hurry it up." I roll my eyes.

"Is it true you took over as Assistant Cheer Coach?" Quinn holds up a newspaper and points at it.

"What? What the hell is that?" I ask her. I took over as what now?

"It's the Star Advertiser." Rachel says like it's obvious. _Right_, because them having a copy of today's Hawaii newspaper is _normal_.

"How the hell do you guys even have that?" I ask.

"I'm subscribed." Rachel shrugs and Quinn nods.

Quinn looks back at it the newspaper and turns a few pages before finding the article in question. She points at what seems to be a picture of a few cheerleaders standing around me while I give directions. "It says right here, 'Santana Lopez, two-time national cheerleading champion, will take over as Assistant Coach after Coach Walker resigns in a month."

I hear Brittany squeal and I look at her. She's off the ground now, her hands tightly grasping each other and she looks like she wants to jump up and down so badly. The smile on her face brings an even bigger one onto mine, if that's even possible. She's happy for me. Hell, I'm happy for me too. Brittany moves her lips to tell me that she's proud of me. I nod back as a thank you.

"Did you say something?" Quinn asks me. I get snapped from my daze of staring at Brittany and look back at Quinn. She must have heard Brittany earlier. Good thing she wasn't watching the screen or else she would've seen me looking at Brittany with all smiles.

"She's there isn't she?" Rachel raises an eyebrow. My eyes widen and my heart beat quickens.

"What?" my voice squeaks. I forgot about Rachel. Damn it Berry, always blending into the disgustingly cheap wallpaper lining of their apartment.

"I'm not blind Santana. I'm pretty sure you're not staring at your closet with that much affection." She tells me knowingly.

"I happen to _love _my clothes, unlike you." I glare back.

"Oh she's definitely there." Quinn speaks up. "She's _extra_bitchy. She's trying to keep up her badass persona."

"I don't know what you two losers are talking about, but I seriously have to go now."

"Aww! Come on! Introduce us! Brittany! Come over here! Come on! I know you're there! If you want friend brownie points then you'll show yourself!" Rachel screams and moves closer to the screen, trying to see if she could see any more inside of my room.

"She's not here alright. God, you're so annoying." I try again but suddenly feel Brittany's hands on my shoulders. I look up and she kisses the top of my head.

"Do I get those brownies now?" she leans down and waves at my best friends.

"Oh my god, you're _gorgeous_." Rachel's eyes widen and I smirk. Fuck yeah she's gorgeous.

"Thanks." I see Brittany smile above me. I'm watching the screen and I can't help but think that we look fucking adorable together. I take a snapshot of my screen and save it for later.

"Brittany, this is Quinn," I point at the blonde on the screen, "and that's RuPaul." I flick my hand towards the image of Rachel, who is now frowning. "Guys, this is Brittany." I turn and give a warm smile to the girl behind me.

"So this is the Brittany we've been hearing so much about." Quinn quirks an eyebrow.

"Do you really talk about me that much Santana?" Brittany laughs.

"N-no. Not really." I stutter.

"Yeah, never mind. She doesn't. We actually don't know much about you." Quinn smirks and Rachel sinks back into her seat giving Quinn a look that says 'Really Quinn? Right now?'

"Quinn I swear to God-" I start but Brittany squeezes my shoulders softly, telling me to calm down.

"Well I'll make sure to change that. We should Skype more often. I know how much you guys mean to Santana." she smiles at them. I swear this girl is fucking perfect. "Especially you Rachel. She's super mean to you all the time, but I know it's all just an act." she laughs.

"Brittany!" I yell.

"What? It's true!" she laughs again and I blush. I look at Rachel and see her blushing too. UGH. She's definitely never going to forget this.

"Babe, stop embarrassing me." I frown.

"Okay fine. I'm sorry," She leans down to kiss my cheek and I smile. "But I was promised brownies so I'm here to collect."

"Santana can make you brownies." Quinn jokes and I look back at her. She knows I hate to cook, let alone bake.

I catch the look on Brittany's face as she scrunches her nose up and I turn my body to look her.

"What's wrong with my brownies? I made you brownies last week!" I pout and her face softens.

"You don't like to follow the recipe San. You always just guess and even though watching you cooking in the kitchen is pretty much the most adorable thing ever, I'm not too keen on eating whatever it is that you end up making." she frowns apologetically.

"Fine how about you make it then? I'll be glad to help you eat them." I tell her defiantly.

"But I can't make my own reward. That doesn't make sense." Her eyebrows furrow.

"Well either that or no brownies." I cross my arms over my chest and smirk.

"Or..." she moves around my chair and sits sideways on my lap. She unravels my arms and places them at her hips before bringing her arms to hang loosely around my neck. Her fingers play with loose hair there and I gulp. "_You_ could do all the work, while _I _boss you around?" she grins.

"Th-that's definitely an option," I swallow. Her hand tangles further into my hair and I give in. "When do you wanna start?" I ask her, my eyes closing.

"Yeah, we're still here guys." Quinn butts in and my eyes snap open to glare at her.

"Sorry." Brittany blushes. She shifts on top of me to face the webcam and I wrap my arms more tightly around her waist to keep her there.

"So anyways about the coach thing, is it true?" Rachel asks me.

"Honestly, I don't know. No one even talked to me about it. But I mean if it's what they want, I guess I'll be happy to fill the spot. I'm a pretty badass cheerleader."

"So badass that you were at the bottom of the pyramid?" Quinn teases.

"Shut up bitch. I was only there because of your big mouth."

"Yeah well, I'm still surprised that your twins didn't blow that one time when Jessica lost balance and everyone collapsed on you."

"I hate that fucking slut. I was sore for days after." I roll my eyes at the memory.

"Don't be mean San." Brittany looks back and frowns.

"Sorry." I kiss her shoulder. I glance back at my screen and Quinn and Rachel look like they just saw a ghost. "What?"

"Did you just apologize?" Quinn asks me and turns to Rachel, "You heard that too right? It's not my imagination?" Rachel nods.

"Shut it. I have the ability to say sorry. It's not beneath me." I roll my eyes.

"Apparently nothing's beneath you. You're such a bottom." Quinn laughs and Rachel makes a whipping noise, making them both laugh louder.

"I hate you both."

"San." Brittany warns and I groan.

"Sorry..." I whisper softly, hoping that the other two won't hear me. But they do of course, both of them almost falling over completely from laughing.

My arms squeeze even tighter around Brittany's waist and my face heats up. Brittany feels it and turns around and brushes her fingers across my collarbone.

"Thank you." she whispers, making me calm down a little. I don't care what those assholes say to me. I have Brittany. That's all that matters right now. She leans in and gives me a chaste kiss on my lips.

I blush and notice that the laughing stopped. I look back at my friends and stick my tongue out at them. Laugh all you want bitches, I gots me a hot a ass girlfriend sitting on my lap.

"So Brittany," Rachel speaks up, "Santana tells me that you listened to my singing?"

"Damn it Berry, I told you to leave it alone." I snap at her. Brittany slaps my leg and turns to face Rachel.

"I did! You have a very beautiful voice. I really like 'Take Me or Leave Me'. It's really good."

"Oh! That one was so much fun to record! What else does Santana have of my songs?" she sits up and I roll my eyes.

"None of them." I tell her. "I made sure to delete-"

"All of them." Brittany interjects and Quinn laughs.

"You too Quinn," she smiles at the other blonde, "I absolutely love the 'I Feel Pretty/Unpretty' mash up that you guys did together."

"Babe," I whisper, "Please stop talking."

"Santana, you have that one? We recorded that separately. It was just a side project. How did you get it?" Quinn questions.

"Artie must have accidentally added it to my thumb drive." I shrug.

"Oh that reminds me! I really love this thumb drive!" Brittany claps and reaches into my desk drawer. Before I can register what she's doing and try to stop her, she whips out Rachel's gold starred thumb drive and shows it to the girls.

"I knew you kept it!" Rachel points, "You told me you threw it away!"

"Fuck my life. Brittany, you're destroying me." I groan loudly.

"I'm sorry." She turns to me and pouts. "Okay, let's stop embarrassing Santana now."

"Yes please." I give her a quick kiss and she smiles again.

"You guys are really cute together," Rachel smiles, "Santana's really lucky to have met you Brittany."

"I think I'm the lucky one." Brittany whispers. She's still turned away from the desk, looking me in the eyes, and I'm sure I've never felt happier.

* * *

"Mami!" I yell from my armchair in the living room. I wait for a few seconds and when I don't hear anything I yell for her again.

"What?" Sugar comes into the room, her hair wild from last night's sleep.

"Breakfast please?" I ask her and throw in an innocent smile.

"Seriously? You wake me up," she pauses and looks at the clock on the wall, "three hours before my alarm just because you have the tummy rumbles?"

I nod back and she turns to walk back to her room. "Wait! Where are you going? Gonna change? Fix your hair maybe? You're coming back out to cook right?" I sit up to watch her retreating figure, worried that I won't be getting breakfast any time soon.

"Eat a Pop Tart. You know how to use a toaster." She mutters back and I hear her door slam.

I groan and take my phone out of my pajama pants pocket. It was so early I hardly think she'll even be up to respond to me.

_[S:] How much would it take for you to come over here and make me a good ol' fashion breakfast? I have the meat, you just gotta do the work :P_

I laugh at myself because really, who doesn't love a good sexual innuendo in the morning?

_[Devin:] … I'm really hoping that you meant to send that to someone else…_

Well this is embarrassing. I need to double check these things more often.

_[S:] Oh shit, my bad. Sorry! That was meant for Britt. Haha, I swear I was just talking about breakfast, no funny business._

_[D:] Riggggght._

_[S:] Well since I know you're up, I might as well just ask you now._

_[D:] Ask away._

* * *

I park my car as close as I can to the entrance of the office building. I've been texting Brittany for the last hour of her shift at the dentist office and she agreed to let me take her out after she's done. She's been working a lot these past few days, and we've barely had time to see each other. Especially since I started getting more and more into coaching.

The current head coach has been training me to take over as assistant for about a week now, and let me just say, it's stressful. I had to lessen my hours at my other job to accommodate.

My official title now is 'Off-Campus' Assistant Coach, which basically means I don't actually need to be a teacher at the school to be able to coach the squad. Sure the pay isn't the greatest, but at least it's not the worst. The high school was a private school, so they had a bit more money. Combined with my telemarketing job, I'm making about two thousand a month.

The thing that I find funny though, is that it's a religious school. A religious school that offered me the job first, before even asking the actual teachers that teach for them. They knew about my sexual orientation, I'm sure of it. It was broadcasted to pretty much anybody with an internet connection. If the local newspaper could figure out that I'm a two-time cheerleading champion, then they sure as hell wouldn't have a hard time finding out that I'm gay.

"Hey gorgeous."

I jump in my seat and almost scream out loud. I turn to my left and find Brittany trying to hold back a laugh.

"What's got you thinking so hard?" she leans forward and crosses her arms on my open window, resting her head on top.

"Just work." I tell her as I turn to my side more. I lean down slightly and give her a quick kiss. "Ready?"

"Almost." she grins, "One more."

I roll my eyes and lean down again to press my lips to hers. I stay there longer than last time and she hums in response. I pull away and her lips curl up slightly. "Ready now?" I giggle.

She nods and pushes herself off my car and walks to the other side of my car to get into the passenger seat.

"So where are we going?" she asks me as I drive out of the parking lot.

"Somewhere that you can get your mind off of things, because you've been so busy lately. You need an outlet."

"Oh I'm not allowed to have outlets." She turns to me, "The guys don't allow it anymore."

"What? Why not?"

"Well, it's not so much that I can't _have _them. It's more like, I can't _use _them, especially in the bathroom." She tells me seriously.

"What?" I pause to think about what it is that she's talking about.

"It's such a stupid reason too. All I did was tell Devin my trick about using the curling iron in the bathtub to prevent from getting burned and he went all ape shit crazy on me. He told the others and they banned me from using my outlets since then."

"Brittany," I grab her hand and interlock our fingers, "I'm talking about a different outlet."

"Oh." She blushes.

"But I really hope you listened to them and stopped curling your hair in the bathtub."

"Yeah, I just have to get Ryan to do my hair if I ever need it curled. He took my curling iron away when I didn't stop."

I stop at a stoplight and look over at Brittany. I watch her as she nods her head to the beat of the music. Looking out the window, oblivious to how amazingly adorable she is right now.

"Well anyways, I had this great idea on how to get you to release some stress. I didn't really know if it was good or not though, so I asked Devin." The light turns green and I turn right, "For some reason, he kinda laughed a lot. But he assured me that it would be okay." I turn left onto a dirt road and continue down, following the trail of tire tracks that other cars have left behind.

"You not bringing me out here to kill me are you?" Brittany laughs and I shake my head.

"No Britt. But I've only done this once before, so maybe." When I see a group of cars parked in a makeshift parking lot I smile. Who needs GPS? I'm a genius.

I quickly look at Brittany to see if she knows where we are. I catch a faint smile playing on her lips, but I can't quite read what it means just yet.

"Devin suggested this place. He said it would be perfect." I tell her when I put my car in park. I jump out and hurry to the other side to help Brittany out, not that she needed it or anything.

"So you brought me here to do what exactly?" she smirks.

"I don't really know. We could watch? It's fun to watch right?" I can't really put my finger on it yet, but I have a feeling I'm being messed with. It feels almost like I'm the only one that doesn't get the inside joke that everybody is laughing at.

She smiles softly and pulls me into a hug. I sink into it and she whispers, "Thank you Santana."

When she pulls away I give her a questioning look. Did I just do something right? I did didn't I? Wait, what did I do?

"Come on," Brittany grabs my hand and pulls me toward the crowd of people standing around.

"PIERCE!" Some guy yells at us, and runs straight to Brittany hugging her in a death grip.

"Holy shit, do my eyes deceive me!?" Another guy walks up and hugs her too.

After a while, the whole group that was standing around came over and formed a new circle around Brittany, greeting her and giving her hug after hug. I have to admit, I was getting a little jealous, but she was smiling so big that I let it go. I could probably take all these guys anyway.

I stand off to the side of the group but still close enough to listen in.

"What are you doing here?"

"How's life been treating you?"

"You going school now yeah?"

"What the hell are you wearing?"

"I hope you're planning on suiting up!"

Question after question and I could tell Brittany had a hard time keeping up. I on the other hand, was beyond confused at this point. I had no idea who these people were, or how they knew Brittany.

"GUYS! Calm down!" Brittany laughs, "I didn't even know I was coming here today, honestly." She looks over at me and motions for me to come closer. When I go to her side she smiles and holds my hand, "This is Santana, my girlfriend." She tells them happily and suddenly all eyes are on me. I sink about three feet in that moment. "She wanted to bring me here to surprise me, but I don't think she knew that this basically used to be like my second home."

I turn to Brittany and she nods. Her second home? So that's why Devin told me it was a good idea. Brittany smiles and motions at the people surrounding us, all of their faces are smiling back at us.

"Santana, I'd like you to meet my motocross family."

* * *

I lean back in one of the chairs lining the dirt track and watch as my girlfriend pretty much tears shit up. Like for real killing it out there on the course. How can this girl get any cooler? It's impossible. Next thing I know, she's going to be riding a unicorn to the moon, and curing cancer. My girlfriend is amazing.

"So Santana how did you and B meet?" one of her friends ask me and hands me a beer. I grab it from him and take a sip.

"We met at school. She's in my class. She also lives kinda close to me too."

"Ah that's cool." We sit in silence and watch her together. "I'm really glad she's dating again. Nice meeting you." He says as he stands up and walks away.

It makes me wonder why so many people talk about Brittany's love life in such a way that's both mysterious but yet so open. Like it's not a secret that something obviously happened in the past, but as to what exactly it was that happened no one seems to be able to talk about it.

"Hey." Another one of her friends sit beside me.

"Hi." I nod back. I do not want to be known as the awkward girlfriend that just sits there and doesn't socialize so I speak up, "So how do _you _know Brittany?"

He looks at me and laughs, "Question of the day huh?"

"Yeah," I laugh along, "I've been asked about twenty times now. I figured I'd give it a try. Peer pressure and all."

"I met her a little after she first moved here. I lived here my whole life and I've been coming to this track since I was young, so when I saw Brittany hanging around one day," he motions to Brittany turning into a particularly hard turn, "I knew that she was new. We got to know each other and she fit right in around here."

"So she's been doing this since before she even moved down here?" I ask, intrigued by her past yet again. I just want to know more.

"Hell yeah! The guys around here gave her crap at first because she was new. But as soon as she got on that bike, she blew everyone away." We see Brittany stop for rest and some water and she turns around to wave at me. "It was her dad that taught her you know." he tells me.

"Really? That must be why she loves it so much." I smile and wave back.

"Such a shame she stopped coming by after a while. She really grew on all of us." He frowns.

"Why'd she ever stop? I mean, if she loves it so much, what's keeping her from doing what she loves?"

"Life I guess." He shrugs, "But here she is, more than a year later and she still can kick my best time's ass."

"She hasn't been here for a _year_?"

"Yeah. We were starting to think that she fell off the earth." He stands and yells with everyone when Brittany does a trick perfectly. She seems so happy. "So, how long have you guys been together?" He asks as he sits again.

"Just a couple of weeks now. February 17th." I smile softly.

"I'm assuming you've already met her friends? They get pretty protective of her. Good luck with that."

"Oh I've met them. They love me. Got no worries there." I laugh. So he knows Brittany friends, maybe he knows... "Do you know mama?" I ask.

I know Brittany told me she can't tell me about her yet, but I just really need to know. If she won't tell me, maybe this guy can.

"Mama?" he turns to me with a confused look. Guess not.

"Oh, nevermind. There's just this woman that keeps calling her and her name is saved as 'Mama' on her phone."

"Hm. I'm not sure. I've never heard her talk about any 'mama' before. It's definitely not her mom though. She told you about that right?" He asks me cautiously, hoping that he didn't say too much.

"Yeah, she told me that they don't talk anymore. As long as mama isn't some crazy ex girlfriend then I think I'm okay." I try to joke about it. Seriously though, if it's an ex girlfriend, I'm gonna have to slap a bitch.

"Nah, it's probably not. She doesn't have any crazy ex girlfriends. Plus last time she actually dated a girl was three years ago." he laughs. "You would think someone like her would get out more right?"

"Wait back up. _Three years? _Why?" I ask him, making it obvious that Brittany hasn't let me in on that part of her past yet. I knew that she doesn't date much, but I didn't think it was as long as three years. He eyes me carefully, making sure to not overstep how much he tells me.

"Maybe you should talk to Brittany about it." He stands to his feet and I frown. "I wouldn't worry too much about mama though. I can tell that Brittany really likes you, so it's only fitting for me to tell you this." He leans down and his eyes turn darker. "The fact that you got so far as to actually _dating _her means that she thinks highly of you. She's not one for games, and from the looks of it, she's in it for the long haul."

My eyes widen and I swallow. This turned around quickly.

"I hope for your sake that you feel the same." he says almost as if he was questioning my intentions.

"I do. I really like her." I hold my stare. Why does it always feel like everyone is out to make sure that _I_ won't hurt _her_? Is it wrong for me to be hesitant because I'm scared _she's _going to hurt _me_?

"Good." He stands up straight and smiles again, "You're a part of this family now, so come on. It's time for you to ride." He grins and pulls me to my feet.

* * *

By the time we get back to my house, it's dark. The air turned cold so I invited Brittany inside for some hot chocolate. Okay maybe I wanted some lady cuddles too. I can't help it if I wanted to finish what we started the other day, before loud mouth and fabgay interrupted.

"You never told me you were into motocross." I hand Brittany her cup of hot chocolate and sit down next to her on the couch.

"You never asked." She shrugs.

"So your dad taught you?"

"Yeah." She smiles into her cup. "Justin must have told you, I saw you guys talking."

"Yeah, he seems nice." I tell her.

"I'm sorry he kinda grilled you. My friends can be a little intense sometimes." She laughs.

"He told you about that?" I look at her and blush.

"Yeah." She looks at me, "You asked him about mama…"

I look away quickly, "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have. I'm sorry if I overstepped."

"No don't be. You have every right to be curious." She puts her cup down on the table and takes my hand in hers. "I want to tell you Santana. I really do. I just really like what we have right now and I just don't want to mess anything up."

"It won't Britt. Nothing would mess this up." I tell her honestly.

"But _this_ is. This whole 'mama' thing. It's making you uneasy. I can tell, every time I take a phone call, you frown. Even if my phone just rings, you frown." She squeezes my hand, "She's not an ex girlfriend. She's not a girlfriend. She's not my mom. She's just someone that you don't have to worry about."

"Then who is she? Why do you have to hide her? Why does no one seem to talk about her?"

She takes a deep breath and looks away, "I guess you could say she kinda works with me."

"So why hide her?"

"It's not that I'm hiding her, Santana. Don't say it like that. It makes me feel like I'm lying to you."

"Then just tell me. Britt, please." I try again.

"When I tell you about mama, I'll have to tell you about a lot of other things. Things that will bring up even more things, some of them I still haven't dealt with myself. I'm not ready for that. Can you please just respect that for now?" she tells me. She's getting frustrated.

"Just tell me one thing then," I touch her chin softly to urge her to look at me in the eyes, "This mama person, I really don't need to worry about her? She's not going to come and sweep you off your feet and carry you into the sunset?" I smile and she does the same.

"She won't be able to. You already have." She leans in and gives me a kiss. "Plus I've only met her like a couple of months ago, and she's kinda crazy. Have you noticed the amount of times she's called me?" she shakes her head, "Of course you have. I actually kinda like seeing you so jealous." She teases.

"Well that's because I don't want you leaving me for some crazy psycho chick. If she calls you so much, how do you know _she_ doesn't like _you_?" I ask her.

"She has a boyfriend. They're madly in love, and she can talk about him for hours." Brittany rolls her eyes. "Is it safe to say that this isn't going to be a problem for us now? Can we go back to being really cute and cuddly?"

"Sure," I lie down on the couch and rest my head on her lap, "When you're ready, you can tell me. Just know that no matter what, I'm here. I always will be."

"Thank you, Santana." She tangles her hands in my hair and I quickly fall asleep.

I feel something tickling my cheek and I try to swat it away.

"Baby," Brittany whispers, "Wake up. It's getting late, I need to go home."

"Stay the night." I mumble into her leg and shuffle closer.

"I can't, I have to go. I'm sorry. Your roommate isn't home yet. I was maybe going to stay and meet her but I guess she's staying out late." She tells me and strokes my hair. I struggle to sit up and stretch away the sleep.

"She's probably working still. She should be home soon." I pull Brittany in for a slow kiss, "Are you sure you have to leave?" I whisper into her mouth.

"Mhmm." She pulls away, "I'm sure. Maybe we should schedule a meet day with her? How about Wednesday after school? I can come over and cook for you guys?"

"She usually works late Wednesdays, but I'm sure she can get out of it. I'll let you know?"

"Okay."

I walk her to her car and hug her tightly.

"I'll call you when I get home." She kisses me and gets into her car. I watch her drive off and go back inside.

After about half an hour, Sugar gets home and walks into the living room.

"Damn it mami, why couldn't you be here thirty minutes ago?" I snap at her.

"What happened? Did you need me to hold your hand while you pee? Jesus Santana, I was working." She snaps back.

"You just missed Britt. She wanted to meet you but you took forever to come home."

"Oh. Well now I'm sad. I really want to meet her too. I feel left out now that Quinn and Rachel met her."

"Actually she said maybe Wednesday she can come over and cook us dinner? Can you get out of work?" I ask her.

"Wednesday? That's usually a late night for me but I can try. I'm sure Val's mom can find someone else to babysit."

"Well, just try ask? I kinda want you two to just meet already." I mumble nervously.

"Sugar test?" she asks me knowingly.

"Sugar test." I nod.

* * *

**AN: I wanted to leave a really mean cliffhanger at the end, but since I figured that you would all hate me, I decided against. So you better love me bitches :) Love me like I love you! Now go leave me a review haha.**

**Shout out to Ryan47! I feel like I messaged you more than I actually wrote haha. Thanks for help with the ideas! I stuck with the motocross one XD**

**Not much development in this chapter. Just more relationship building and stuff like that. So I apologize from the bottom of my heart that it took so long for this update. **

**I'm sorry that there was a tiny bit more of teasing on mama but I needed to make sure that you guys understand that she's not someone to worry about haha. From next chapter and on is where everything gets a bit crazy.**

**Next Chapter: The Sugar Test! What do you want to happen/see? Also, you might finally meet 'mama' in chapter 9. Depends on how I feel… heheh. Don't you just love a good tease?**


	9. The Sugar Test Part I

**AN: I'm SO sorry for the long wait! And believe me, my beta hates me as much as you all probably do for not updating sooner. **

**I know it's short but this chapter was by far the hardest chapter to write. Everything I wrote just made Brittany seem really shady. And that was never my intention. I just want her to come off more as guarded and unsure. In my head, it makes sense for Brittany to be over protective of herself. And I hope you all feel that way too after finding out her situation.**

**Cue angsty chapter…**

Brittany POV

* * *

Chapter 9: The Sugar Test Part I

I walk into the crowded diner and blindly make my way over to my usual booth. I'm meeting Devin and Eric here before our study session. Joel and Ryan are to show up soon too.

I tap away at my phone, dodging people in the process. I've been here so many times that I don't even need to look up to know where I'm going. Santana is texting me right now anyways so it's not my fault if I find her more important at the moment.

_[S:] I'm so sorry I can't make it again tonight Britt. I really thought coach would let us go early._

_[B:] It's okay San. I know you need your rest. Let me know when you get home. Maybe I'll leave here early and bring you some dessert :)_

_[S:] Wanky.._

_[B:] You use that word too much :P_

_[S:] Only for you Britt-Britt :)_

I sit down at our booth without looking up and continue to text Santana.

_[B:] So I've been meaning to ask, what would you and your roommate like for dinner on Wednesday? She's not allergic to anything is she?_

_[S:] Just make anything. She'll pretty much eat anything as long as it smells delicious._

_[B:] Well what does she like? I want her to like me :)_

_[S:] Honestly Britt, she'll eat anything. And don't worry, she'll LOVE you :)_

"Excuse me?" someone taps my shoulder and I look up. I'm greeted by two very unfamiliar faces sitting with me in the booth. It looks as if I just interrupted a date. The two teenagers look at me, the boy looks as if he's scared for his life, and the girl, she just looks down right mean.

"Who the hell are you?" the girl snaps at me. Before I can apologize she turns to her date, "Is this who you've been sleeping around with? Are you fucking kidding me? She looks like she's thirty!" she screams.

"Thirty?" I question. What the hell is happening?

"Yes, _thirty._" She smirks. "Can't you get arrested for something like that?"

"Oh my god, wow. I don't even know either of you. I was here meeting some friends and I just assumed that they would be in our regular seat." I try to explain.

"Well you assumed wrong." The girl glares at me.

I get up of the seat quickly. Before I turn to look for Devin and Eric, I get the urge to give this girl a piece of my mind. I realize that it would be too mean of a thing to do so instead, I lean down and look at the scared boy.

"She's kind of a bitch. You could definitely do better." I smile and throw in a wink, making him sink further into the seat. Just as I'm walking away I can hear his girlfriend now yelling at him.

I spot Devin and Eric laughing away in another booth on the other side of the diner. I roll my eyes and walk up to them.

"Why didn't either of you stop me when I walked in? You could've saved me from that embarrassing moment." I put my hands on my hips and the laughing stops.

"Sorry B," Eric smiles, "We saw that you were distracted and made a bet to see if you would notice."

"Twenty bucks!" Devin yells and holds out his hand towards Eric who groans loudly before placing the bill in Devin's hand.

"You guys are seriously the best." I tell them sarcastically and sit down on Eric's side of the booth.

"Were you texting Santana?" Devin asks and I nod.

"Is she coming tonight?" Eric chimes in and I shake my head slowly.

"I'm thinking about bringing her some dessert though. She's been really tired with work and school lately. Plus I kinda want to see her again." I smile.

"Didn't you just see her yesterday? You guys went to the dirt track right?"

"Yeah but I didn't get to spend time with _her_. All the guys wanted to talk to me and catch up. I think it disappointed her a bit." I frown.

"That's partly my fault." Devin raises his hand slightly, "Sorry B, she just wanted to know if it would make you happy. I didn't think they would steal you away from her."

"No it's okay. I really enjoyed myself. I can't believe I still could do some of the tricks I was doing." I laugh at myself because I actually ended up falling a few times before landing the really hard ones.

Joel and Ryan walk up and we slide over to give them room. Joel motions at the kitchen and the worker there nods, understanding. Our food gets brought to us shortly after and we all dig in silently.

"So Wednesday's the big night right? You're meeting her roommate?" Ryan asks and I nod, not wanting to talk with my mouth full of fries.

"Nervous?" he continues, "What if she doesn't like you?"

"Don't say that! She'll love you Britt, don't worry about it." Joel smiles.

"I'm thinking of telling her soon." I blurt out and everyone stops eating to look at me.

"Are you serious?" Eric asks.

"About time." Devin says which in turn earns him a jab in the rib by Joel.

"Are you sure it's the right time?" Ryan questions.

"I think so." I tell them, "I don't know. I was thinking maybe in a month or so. If it feels like it could get serious then yeah. If it does then it's going to have to come out sooner or later."

"What does mama think?" Joel asks and I sigh.

"Mama doesn't know about Santana yet." I tell him. "I kinda wanted to keep Santana to myself. Just have it be me and her. Like no one else mattered anymore you know? I just want to feel like I'm free to do my own thing for a little bit longer."

"Brittany," Devin sits up and looks at me knowingly, "It's totally understandable that you want those things, but you have to be realistic. You can't do things that way anymore."

"Devin, why do you have to be such a dick for?" Ryan speaks up, "You're supposed to be Brittany's friend right now."

"Shut up," Devin snaps, "Santana is my friend too, you know."

"Devin," Eric speaks up, "You can't expect B to just go and tell the girl. You have to think about it from her point of view. If she does this, it'll be like she's opening herself up to everything, including rejection."

"Look, all I'm saying is that Santana is a good girl. I'm not going to sit back and watch as Brittany fucks this up." Devin says.

"I'm not going to mess anything up!" I raise my voice, "I just need time. I'm sorry Devin, I know you only want the best. I'm just scared." Devin frowns at my words.

"Brittany," he waits for me to look at him. "You have absolutely _nothing _to be afraid of. This girl is in love with you. Like madly in love type love. I almost want to kill myself in the middle of class sometimes because she keeps showing me the cutesy text messages you send to each other and shit. Don't even ask me how many pictures she has of you on her phone because I promised her I'd never tell."

"Really?" I ask him and he nods. "How many pictures?" I smile.

"I said don't ask. I plead the fifth, B. I promised Santana I wouldn't tell." He smiles back and I give him my signature pout. "Damn it B, Santana's gonna kill me."

* * *

I wake up to the sounds of my alarm clock screaming at me. I roll over to my side and reach blindly to turn it off. When silence takes over again, I close my eyes and sleep for another fifteen minutes before the same sounds shake me from my quick dream.

Every Wednesday is the same. It has been for the past two months. I wake up, get ready, greet mama in the kitchen, eat a bagel, and leave my house. Then I buy two coffees, walk to Santana's house, and she drives us to school.

Only more recently, I can add 'kiss Santana' to that routine. That's my favorite part. Singing in the car together is a close second though. But kissing her is for sure number one.

"Hey mama," I wave sleepily.

"Good morning, babe." She says almost too cheerfully and continues to cook breakfast, "I let myself in, I hope you don't mind."

"When have I ever minded?" I laugh. This girl lets herself in every time she comes over. It's not exactly news to me.

"Your bagel is still in the toaster. Want me to make you some coffee?" she asks.

"No thanks. I'll just pick some up later." I tell her. I don't usually make it a habit to talk to her about my life but since today was a good day, I strike up more conversation. "So, big plans tonight?"

She looks back at me and smiles, apparently surprised that I'm trying to talk to her for once. "Yeah, I made plans with some friends. But you don't have to worry. Devin said that he can come here later to help."

"Oh. Okay, thanks." I awkwardly sit down and wait for my bagel to pop out.

It felt weird talking to her about my life. I've known her for a couple of months now, but it feels like I barely _know_her. I mean, we occasionally talk about her boyfriend, and my classes, but that's about it. Given the circumstances, I feel like I should know her more.

"So what are _you_up to tonight?" she asks carefully.

"Oh, I'm just meeting some friends." I don't look at her.

"Friends? Or _girlfriend_?" she tries and I find her eyes.

"It's none of your business." I roll my eyes. "But yes, girlfriend is the right word to use." I smile.

"So does she know? When can I meet her?" she perks up and moves her food from the heat on the stove. She walks to the counter and sits across of me.

"I haven't told her yet, so you probably won't meet her for a while now." I frown.

My bagel pops out and we both jump at the sound. I stand and grab it with a paper towel. I don't bother with the cream cheese, and walk out of the kitchen before she can stop me for more conversation. Leaving mama in the middle of a conversation seemed to be a normal thing nowadays anyway. She knows I only do it when I feel uncomfortable.

I walk into the small bedroom across of mine and peek in. I see the familiar small figure of a little girl getting ready for breakfast and I lean against the doorframe to inspect while eating my bagel. She's fixing her bed now in the most adorable sleepy state.

"You don't have to wake up this early when I go to school you know?" I tell her and she jumps up in surprise. I smile and slowly drop to my knees. She manages to walk over to me and give me the same hug she gives me every time I leave.

"I know. But sometimes you don't come home till after my bedtime and I don't get to see you all day." she sinks in my arms and I hold her there.

"I'm sorry baby. I'll try and be home earlier from now on." I tell her reassuringly.

"What about tonight?" she whispers, probably on the verge of falling asleep again.

"I'll be home right after school but then I'm leaving again. I have a dinner with someone that could be really special tonight. Do you understand what I'm saying?" I ask her and stroke my fingers through her soft hair, pulling out the little tangles along the way.

"You have a date?" she pulls away and looks at me.

"Sort of… I really like her, and I'm meeting one of her friends. Wish me luck?"

"You don't need luck. You're awesome. Will I get to meet her too? What if she doesn't like me?" the little girl frowns and I do too.

It was something that's been bothering me too. What if Santana didn't want to be with me after she found out? I know that she cares for me, but I just don't know what she would think about this. I have a right to protect myself right? Especially protect the little girl in my arms.

"I hope she will baby. But for now, I'm gonna see how things go. Maybe you'll meet her soon okay?" I tell her and she nods. "Be good to mama today. She looks tired. Uncle Dev is gonna come by later. I grant you full permission to give _him _a hard time."

"Don't be mean mommy." She smiles and I giggle at her. I pull her in for one more hug before leaving her room.

I walk back into the kitchen and put the check that I wrote earlier on top the counter.

"Your check is on the counter, mama." I tell the girl whose back is still facing me.

"Thanks Britt." She says, not turning from the food on the stove.

As I walk through the front door, I can't help but think that maybe we could actually be good friends one day.

* * *

It was about 5:30pm and I park my car next to Santana's on her driveway. I look in my rearview mirror to inspect my makeup and my hair. I need to make a good impression with her roommate. I know that they're close and I can't risk her not liking me.

Santana decided to be mean, and not tell me what her roommate liked so now I just have to wing it without a special gift. I _am _cooking dinner for the both of them though, so hopefully I can remember the recipe correctly.

Walking up to the front door, I wonder if I should ring the bell or just walk right in. I figure walking in would be pretty bad seeing as I've never met her roommate and I don't want to scare her right off the bat.

I press the little button and wait patiently for Santana to open the door. I can hear them moving around on the other side of the door. When I make out what I believe to be Santana telling her roommate to open the door, I get a thousand times more nervous.

The door swings open and I fumble with the groceries in my hands, "Hi, I'm Britt-"

We make eye contact. It became the longest, most awkward five seconds of my life.

Right before my very eyes stood Sugar Motta.

Sugar.

Motta.

"Britt?" She whispers and glances behind her to make sure Santana isn't close, "_You're_the 'Brittany' Santana's been dating?" she asks me softly.

"Hey!" Santana comes up behind Sugar so fast that I barely had time to register what was happening. She looks between the both of us and registers our shocked expressions. "Sugar, did you introduce yourself?" she asks.

"Santana…" Sugar starts but I'm quick to jump in. I extend my hand out in front of me and grab Sugar's, prompting her to look at me.

"I'm Brittany. Nice to meet you. What was your name again?" I ask her kindly, my eyes begging her to take the hint. She does and smiles a little unsurely as she shakes back and offers her name.

"Great." Santana smiles, "Come on in Britt, I just put dinner in the oven."

"I thought I was cooking?" I ask her while trying my best to ignore Sugar's stares. I don't know how long I'll be able to last tonight. Lying to Santana was never something that I wanted to do.

"Yeah but Sugar told me that since we were hosting this at our house, we were supposed to make dinner." She goes to the couch and sits down, patting next to her to tell me to sit too.

"Let me just put these away in the kitchen." I hold up the items in my hand and she nods.

I walk into the kitchen and internally punch myself in the face. How did I miss this? How do they know each other? Not only do they know each other, they're roommates. ROOMMATES. I walk over to the refrigerator and begin to put everything inside.

The only things that I can remember Sugar telling me about her life were that she was from Ohio and that she moved here a year ago.

"Brittany," Sugar walks into the kitchen and my muscles tighten automatically. I turn around and look over her shoulder.

"Where is Santana?" I ask.

"She's picking out some music to play during dinner."

"Maybe I should go help," I say quickly and try to get around her to leave. She grabs my arm and stops me.

"Brittany we have to talk about this." her voice is lowered now. "We can't just pretend we don't know each other."

"Sugar please, not now. I can't. I'm not ready." I plead with her. Her face hardens and I know I've said the wrong thing.

"You're not _ready_? Maybe you should've thought about that before you got into a _relationship _with her. That girl out there," she points at the door she entered from, "thinks that you're the most amazing person in the world right now."

"Who's amazing now?" Santana walks through the door and my heart drops to the floor. I feel like I'm dying.

"You! I think you're amazing!" I nearly yell and move to Santana's side. I grab her hand and look at Sugar. My eyes beg for her to play along again.

"Yeah," Sugar agrees softly.

"Sugar was just about to tell me how you two know each other." I tell Santana and she smiles. As innocent as the question sounded, it was actually me just really wanting to know how these two could possibly know each other.

"Come on. I'll show you." She grabs my hand and leads me into her bedroom. We walk up to the corkboard hanging on her wall. The very same corkboard that's been there this whole time. I never once thought to look at it close enough to notice that Sugar was right there, standing next to Santana and the rest of their friends in almost every picture.

"Glee club." I mutter softly to myself.

Sugar Motta, Ohio native, McKinley High School graduate, one year under Santana, and Glee Club member. How the hell did I miss this?

"She's also kinda like my best friend." Santana smiles and looks at me. "Her dad is like this hot shot rich dude and I guess something happened between them, so she got cut off. I mentioned to her that I wanted to move out of the dorms and next thing I know, she flies down here on her last bit of money and we became roomies. We found this place pretty cheap and she had to get a job to pay for her part of course."

"Wow." I breathe out, still trying to take everything in.

"Hey," Sugar peeks her head in and taps slightly at Santana's door. "Dinner is almost done. You might want to check the oven San." She smiles and looks at me. I look away immediately.

"Thanks mami." Santana turns to me, "So since Sugar said I was the one that had to cook, because really, you're kinda my guest and not hers, I made the only thing I know how." She smiles proudly.

I raise an eyebrow at that because I know Santana well enough to know that she doesn't cook, ever. "I don't know whether to be scared or excited." I tell her honestly and she laughs.

"Come on." She grabs my hand and pulls me out of her room, "Dinner time!"

* * *

I smile bashfully at Santana while she stabs one of her dinosaur chicken nuggets with her fork and chops down on half the body.

"So, dinosaur… nuggets…" I speak up and both pairs of eyes look at me. "This is… interesting."

"It really is the only thing I know how to make, besides soup from a can of course. But you probably would scold me for making that so I made these." She eats another dinosaur, "These are so fucking good!"

"Santana seriously, hold back the foodgasm. It's not attractive." Sugar tells her.

"I can foodgasm whenever I damn well please. Britt doesn't mind, she's seen me eat before. Right Britt?" she turns to me and I chuckle.

"Oh I know how you get. I learned to not get between you and you're food a long time ago. One time-," I turn to Sugar to tell the story but then immediately get reminded of the fact of how awkward this is and stop myself.

"What were you gonna say Britt?" Santana asks, looking between the two of us.

"Never mind. I forgot, sorry."

I glance at Sugar and there's a subtle understanding that it'd be best to avoid talking to each other throughout the night. I know she's already mad at me. I can feel it from here. I just hope Santana doesn't feel it too.

"Brittany, I don't know if I ever told you, but Sugar works as a babysitter." Santana strikes up more conversation and I feel myself die a little more inside.

"Oh yeah? That's cool." I nod and reach for my glass of water. I start to drink it like crazy. I know I'm blushing now because I can feel the heat on my cheeks even though the cold water is filling my mouth.

"Yeah, she's been babysitting this one girl for a while now, she's really cute." She says cheerfully and my ears perk up at this information.

"You've… met her?" I ask softly, not wanting to even look at Sugar. When did she meet her?

"You should meet her." Santana continues and I'm praying to god that this conversation will end soon. I bring my glass of water back to my mouth and notice that it's nearly empty when she speaks up again, "Actually, Sugar brought her over on more than one occasion. I'm surprised we've never all been at home at once before."

And then I choke. Like literally choke on my water. I almost made it past this conversation, but after hearing that last part, I _had_to look at Sugar.

"Really now?" I question, still looking at Sugar. "She's been here before?"

"Yeah," Sugar sinks in her chair, quickly forgetting that she was the one that was supposed to be mad. "Once or twice maybe."

"More like once or twice every week." Santana laughs, "Sugar here thinks the house that she babysits at is too boring, so she brings the little one here instead."

I quirk my eyebrow and Sugar stands suddenly. "I'm going to go grab the dessert. Brittany," she looks at me, "Would you come help me?"

* * *

After having the most intense conversation ever, Sugar and I walk back from the kitchen to the dinner table and sit down.

"Where's the dessert?" Santana asks, her plate clean. All the dinosaurs are gone, and I have a pretty good idea on where they went.

"What?" Sugar looks at Santana.

"Dessert? You said you were going to grab it? You guys were in there for like ten minutes. Any longer and I would've thought you guys were still making the damn thing." Santana laughs.

"Oh right, sorry. I must've forgotten it." Sugar mumbles and goes back into the kitchen.

"Sorry, we were just talking." I tell Santana.

"It's okay. I'm really glad you guys like each other." She smiles and I get hit with the feeling of guilt. "What were you talking about?"

"Her job mostly." It wasn't a lie. In fact, that was exactly what we were discussing. Maybe discussing isn't the right word, it was more like arguing.

"I almost envy her. Being able to spend the day with the cutest little girl. I don't know who's more excited when we see each other." She smiles softly, "I've been teaching her Spanish too! She's so smart it's unbelievable."

Well that definitely explains a lot. I was wondering why all of sudden Spanish seemed to be the new language spoken in my house.

"I bet her mom has been wondering why her daughter started speaking Spanish all of a sudden." she jokes and I almost choke on air. It's like she's reading my mind.

"Do you know anything about her mom?" I ask her cautiously.

"Not really, just that she's really cool. Sugar said that they don't talk much. I guess she just likes her privacy."

"Yeah… probably." I agree softly. Sugar walks back to the table with our dessert in hand and glances at me. I straighten in my chair immediately, mentally telling the girl who's in charge now. Although I'm not the type of person to toy with another person's emotions, I can't help but get the urge to do so with Sugar. Especially after hearing what I heard earlier.

"Britt, you okay?" Santana asks me, picking up on my changed persona. I snap my head back to Santana and quickly realize that I need to keep myself in check.

"I'm fine, just patiently waiting for dessert." I smile at her. I turn to look at Sugar, her face is flushed and I know that she's trying her hardest not to show how mad she is right now.

Sugar looks at me and I can feel the tension between the both of us. I match her stare and with my eyes, I tell her to watch herself. This isn't about me and Santana anymore. She knows it and I know it. She crossed the line, no, she completely bulldozed through the line.

I can't help but feel that I crossed the line in too, making her keep up the charade that I established for tonight. It makes me sick to the stomach to think that it came down to this. To me actually having to sit through this like it was just a normal dinner, lying to Santana.

But this is beyond my feelings for Santana now. It's about me, my life, and Sugar disrupted it in the most chaotic way. She threatened to pop my perfect bubble that I've been happily living in, and I just can't have that.

No matter how much I feel for Santana, I have one other priority that is beyond her, beyond me. That priority is probably sitting in front of a television screen right now, laughing at something Spongebob just said.

Sugar crossed the one line that I set for her. The one line that made me feel at ease with letting someone that I barely knew, watch over someone that is my entire life. Every time I would leave for school or work, I felt relief knowing that the little girl at home was being protected. Protected from everything that is the cruel world.

She crossed the line and I'm not about to let that slide.

"Sugar," I look at her, "Do you enjoy babysitting?" I smile casually and she sinks in her chair.

"Yes." She nods.

"Well, I want to hear more about your fun little _adventures _you have with this little girl."

She frowns and looks between me and Santana.

"Oh! Tell her about the time we took her to the zoo!" Santana giggles and I keep my stare on Sugar.

"Oh? The Zoo? That seems a little far to take someone else's kid don't you think?" I question Sugar and I notice the slight drop her head makes.

"It was hilarious Britt." Santana continues, "We go to the zoo to look at all the animals, but really, all Val wanted to do was run through the flock of birds occupying the lawn right outside the entrance. By the time we finally got inside, she just kept whining because she wanted to play with the birds again." She laughs.

Something about that story makes me look at Santana. Did she just say 'Val'? Are we talking about the same kid now?

"Val?" I ask her and she laughs, waving her hand at me.

"Yeah, I gave her that name. She tells me she hates it but I know she secretly loves when I call her that. It's one of my favorite songs," she smiles softly, "_Valerie_…" she sings the familiar tune and I smile back.

I have to hand it to her, it is a cute nickname. Leave it to Santana to make me forget that I'm actually supposed to be mad right now. I power through my feelings and turn back to Sugar to finish what I started.

"So her mom_, your boss_," I emphasize the last part, "She lets you take her out a lot?"

Sugar shakes her head.

"No?" I ask as conformation and Sugar responds with a soft no. "Not ever?"

Sugar looks at me with softer eyes now, begging me to lighten up the conversation but my resolve at this point is far too strong.

"But why not?" I ask, almost like I'm scolding her now. I know the answer and she knows I know the answer. I just want to make sure _she_ knows the answer.

"The reason doesn't concern me. It's just a rule. It's the only rule." She responds, repeating the same words that I used when she asked me the same question a few months ago.

"So you just went behind her back? You just lied to her? Day after day? Doesn't that bother you?" I push even further, and the fire in her eyes ignites once again.

"Does it bother _you?"_ She spits back, a little too harshly and Santana finally picks up on the tension. Color her confused for sure.

"Sugar!" Santana looks at the other girl and frowns, "What the hell?"

Sugar stands abruptly and almost kicks her chair behind her, trying to relieve some of her pent up frustration. She curses under her breath and makes her way out of the room.

"Where the hell are you going!?" Santana stands too, "Sugar!" she yells and Sugar turns around.

"I have to go. I forgot that I had something planned. Sorry S," she glances at me and then looks back to Santana, "She passes…" she whispers and I barely hear it, making me slightly confused. Santana is too apparently because she looks back at Sugar almost as if she's asking if she's sure. When Sugar nods slowly it looks forced, and she looks back at me, "It was nice meeting you Brittany…" she says through gritted teeth. With that she leaves, and I can almost feel the intensity go straight to my heart when I hear the front door slam.

"What the fuck?" Santana breathes out and sits back down.

"I'm sorry." I almost whisper. But only I know the real reason behind my words.

"It's okay. She probably just had a bad day… It's not your fault" Santana says but doesn't look at me.

The feeling of guilt hits me like a bus. I shouldn't have done that. That was so unlike me. I don't even know what came over me just now, I just felt so mad and I needed to get it out. It felt almost instinctual to act that way. But to treat Sugar the way that I did just now, she didn't deserve it. Nobody deserves that.

We sit in silence for a few minutes before Santana gets up to clean up. I follow her and begin to help her. When we're done we stand awkwardly in the middle of the room, trying to figure out what to do with ourselves now. It wasn't comfortable anymore. It felt weird to be here.

My phone chirps from the counter and I register the noise as a text notification. I reach for it quickly, thankful that it just gave me something to do than just stand there in silence.

_[Devin:] __Just left your place. Mama is there now... She's not very happy. WTF is going on? Call me when you can._

I sigh and run my free hand through my hair.

"Is everything okay?" Santana steps in front of me and I bow my head slightly.

"I'm so sorry Santana," I grab her hand and squeeze it softly, "I have to go. I know you wanted to spend more time together tonight but it's an emergency and I can't ignore it."

"Is it mama?" she avoids my eyes and I duck my head slightly to get her to look me in the eyes.

It wouldn't be right to tell her now. After everything that happened tonight and after everything I just did. I can't bring myself to do it, to completely risk everything. The possibility of her rejecting me is too high right now. I wanted to do it right. But at this point there is no right or wrong. I'm just not ready.

"It's okay," she forces a smile, "You don't have to tell me." her eyes frown and I almost tear at the sight in front of me.

"I... have..." _a daughter._ No, I can't start with that, that's too much. I shake my head slightly before trying again, "Mama…" _is my babysitter._ Nope, not that either. This is too much already. There's too much emotions flying around right now and this is definitely not how I planned to tell her.

Santana's grip tightens around my hand, sensing the inner turmoil going on in my head. She pulls me into a hug and I sink into her embrace. As much as I wanted to stay with her, I knew that I shouldn't. It felt wrong to be here. The longer I stayed, the more and more it hurt just being there, lying to her. I want to be with her, but not tonight, I have to fix things with Sugar first. It's only right to do that.

The feelings I have for Santana grow greater every day. Why can't I seem to find the right words to just tell her? I hate myself for this. I hate everything that's happening right now. I hate that I let myself fall into this so easily. But who am I kidding, falling for Santana _is _easy. How could I not fall for someone as amazing as her?

My feelings for her are the one thing that I'm absolutely sure about. I'm one hundred percent sure that I want to be with her. The thing that makes me _unsure_ though, is the fact that she might not feel the same way. That I'll let her into every part of my world and it'll scare her away.

That was the one thing that I absolutely did not want.

* * *

I open my door slowly, and peek in. Everything seems normal, nothing broken. I make my way to the living room and turn the corner to come face to face with the smaller woman.

Her arms are crossed over her chest and I can feel the heat coming off of her. She's mad. Mad at me. And she has every right to be. I should've known this was going to happen. My previous resolve has long ago shattered, and I'm left with the same scared self that I usually am.

"Mama..." I breathe. I reach to grab her arm but she steps back and holds her hand up to stop me.

"What?" she spits, "Don't know my fucking name still? After tonight, I _know _that you know it now." she's almost screaming now.

"Sugar," I drop the stupid nickname and use her real one, "Please keep your voice down. Just let me explain."

She no longer hid her emotions. There was no other person in the room, no Santana. She had no reason to hold back anymore and I had no reason to stop her. The display of emotions that played across our faces spoke for themselves.

She steps up to me, her eyes burning into mine, "This isn't a game. If you hurt her, Brittany," Her head tilted up to face me. She's smaller than me, but right now it's almost as if she isn't. "I fucking swear to God I'm coming after you. Santana is my best friend, and you, you're nothing to me."

I can feel the tears burning pathways down my face now. So much for becoming friends, this just got a whole lot more complicated.

* * *

**AN: Please don't hate me for this chapter…**

**Throughout the dinner scene, I wanted to show Brittany's shift from being scared to being mad. At first she was scared of Sugar telling Santana but then it completely changes after the unseen conversation in the kitchen with Sugar. **_**That**_** scene will be in the next chapter. I love me some overprotective!Britt.**

**If any of you are interested, I have Twitter and Tumblr. If you want updates or just wanna chat, you can find me there :) Links are on my account page. I love you all. SERIOUSLY. I REALLY DO. So please review :)**


	10. The Sugar Test Part II

**AN: Sugar POV! Probably gonna be the only time I'm using someone besides our girls as the POV so I hope it's bearable. I just thought that this was the best way to go about this chapter.**

**Again, flashbacks are italicized. **

Sugar POV

Chapter 10: The Sugar Test Part II

It's been a week since that night. The night where I was practically forced to keep quiet and lie to my best friend. I hate how things unraveled that night. It was chaotic, and completely uncalled for. The way Brittany and I handled it is embarrassing at best.

After getting a few days to calm my nerves I finally got time to think about everything. Sure, we could have approached the problem that night better than we did, but under the circumstances, it definitely couldn't have been avoided completely.

I fucked up and I fucked up _bad_. I put myself in this position and now, I have to lie to the only person that helped me when I needed it the most.

* * *

_"I'm going to go grab dessert." I stand from my seat, my legs trembling, I just lost the upper hand in this whole charade and I lost it in the worst way. "Brittany, would you come help me?" I ask her and leave for the other room quickly._

_I know our conversation would be safe from Santana's ears in the kitchen because she'll think that we're just talking. She'll be thinking about the Sugar test and she won't want to interrupt._

_"Brittany let me go first." I start when the blonde walks through the door._

_"No, you don't get to explain." She spits back. I've never seen her like this. It's as if she were an entirely different person._

_"I just took her here a couple of times. Only on really boring days. I promise you, I'm always safe. We even walk sometimes! It's good to get some fresh air." I try again._

_"Sugar, you really need to stop talking before I beat the shit out of you right now." She growls and my eyes widen when they connect with her fierce blue. __She never swears__. Everyone who knows her knows this. If she does, then it's because she means business._

_My mind thinks back to Santana's words not too long ago. What if I had been home babysitting one day and Santana just happens to have come home early with Brittany in tow. Brittany, being this angry after just merely _hearing_ about it, would totally flip after _seeing_ it with her own eyes._

_"Brittany I'm sorry I overstepped but I didn't know it was that important!" I still try, hoping that would be enough to get through to the determined mother._

_"Of course it's important! How could it not be important! It was the one rule Sugar, THE ONLY RULE." She raises her voice before pausing and pinching the bridge of her nose. "When I first met you, I immediately knew that I could trust you. I don't know how but after all the interviews and all the applicants, you were the only one that really got to me."_

_"I thought I was the first one you interviewed?" I ask her, remembering she told me that I was the first when I met her for the interview._

_"You were, and as you remember, Devin and Eric were both present." Her tone softens, and I nod, "Right when you left the coffee shop, I told them that I made my decision to hire you. They convinced me to meet with more babysitters throughout the week just to be sure."_

_"But you called me the night that I was interviewed…" I tell her softly._

_"I went through a lot of people, and sure some were great, but I just knew that you would be perfect for the job. I trusted you instantly, and I went with my gut feeling. I trusted you with my daughter. __I trusted that you would keep her safe from harm."_

_We stand there in silence for a minute until I notice her posture straighten. She's gearing up again and I know why._

_"But now you've completely shattered that trust." Her words are sharp and I feel them cut through me. "Which in turn brings me to my next point," She pauses and I register the faint hesitation pulling at her eyes. I can tell she doesn't want to do this, but something deep inside of her is making her when the hesitation quickly gets replaced by fire. "When we get back to the table, we're both going to pretend that everything is going well. We're going to continue with what I started until the night ends. We can talk about it more later, but for now, we need just to get past tonight."_

_I step back. Is she seriously asking me to lie to my best friend? This isn't begging me to play along anymore; this is her _telling_ me what to do._

_"Why would I do that? I'm not going to lie to her anymore Brittany. I could walk in there right now and break this whole perfect picture you have going on."_

_"You're not going to do that." She glares at me knowingly._

_"Why the fuck not? I'm not going to lie to my best friend!" I raise my voice a little more._

_She walks to my side and I stay frozen still staring at where she used to be, clenching my fists. I don't turn my head to look at her because I already know that she's staring at me._

_"Because I now know how much you actually need this job." She whispers._ _I snap my head to the side to look at her. She was right. She's going to use my job as a way of keeping me quiet._

_"I'm sorry that it came down to this. But I love my daughter. Please don't try to twist my intentions, I really do like Santana. But I think I deserve the right to decide when I tell her." She closes her eyes and takes in a shaky breath, "I wanted to introduce them to each other one day, knowing that I found someone crazy enough to take me as I am. To take all of me, daughter included. I hope that that person is Santana. I wanted to see them together for the first time, smiling and laughing and getting along. But you took that privilege away from me."_

_"Why are you doing this?" my voice barely a whisper. She opens her eyes and her face hardens._

_"Do you know what a mother fears most for their children?" I shake my head no. _

_"That someone will hurt them." She tries to keep her face strong but I can see the tears make their way forward, "I don't wish any kind of pain on my little girl. Children love with completely open hearts. I wanted to make sure of my feelings before moving forward with Santana. I wanted to know her feelings. If it's serious, which I hope more than anything it will be, I wanted to bring her into that part of my life, to be able to trust her holding onto _my daughter's_ heart. Finding out that you took that from me, that _you_ were the one to bring my daughter into this before I had the chance to even wrap my own head around it, infuriates me."_

_"Brittany…"_

_"No. Don't you dare fucking say anything. I will protect my daughter with my life. I will protect her even if that means losing Santana. You will not bring her here anymore, do you understand? This needs to stop. The fact that she's grown so attached already is too much to handle. I will not let you break my little girl's heart." The tears finally fall but she doesn't wipe them. She wants me to know how much she cares. How much her daughter means to her. More than anything, she wants me to know how much doubt she has in her relationship with Santana. Does she really think that Santana will break her heart?_

_I think I underestimated how much of a mother Brittany is._

* * *

My phone rings and pulls me from my memory. I quickly go to answer it, not caring who would be on the other end.

"Hello!" I chirp into the phone and lean back into Santana's armchair. We need to seriously buy a second one of these.

"Ma- Sugar?" Brittany's voice cuts through and I groan.

"Uh yeah? Aren't you the one that called me? Shouldn't you know it was me?" I ask her and roll my eyes. "You can still call me mama you know. It's crazy that you and Santana would think of practically the same nickname for me..."

"Oh right sorry. I was just um calling… to um… ask you if…"

"You want to know how she's doing?" I ask her knowingly. She breathes a soft 'Yeah' and I take a deep breath. "She's asking me a lot of questions Brittany. You need to talk to her. You can't keep pretending to be too busy for more than a week and have it not look suspicious."

"I know. I just don't know what to tell her. I know that if I'm around her again after that night, I'll feel like I'm lying to her. I don't want that." She sighs and I can almost imagine the hand running through her hair in frustration. "This is so complicated."

"You can say that again."

"I'm sorry mama. You have to know how sorry I am. I know what I did was horrible."

"I'm not gonna lie. I kind of still hate you. It was pretty low to pull the job card on me."

"I won't fire you Sugar." She responds quickly, "My daughter loves you. No matter how I look at it, you're already a part of my family, babysitter or not. She really loves her time with you."

"I love her too Britt." I pause, "I've made my decision." She takes a breath and I physically brace myself for the words that are about to leave my mouth. "I won't tell her. You're still entitled to have that right, and even though she's my best friend, I trust that you will handle this well."

"Are you serious?" she asks me with uncertainty.

"I was really mad that night, especially when I went to your house. I know that we may not have been the best of friends before, I'd like to think of you as one now."

"Can I ask you something?" her voice soft.

"Sure."

"What made you come back? Or really why?" she asks. It was an understandable question. In hindsight if I hadn't gone back inside her house after I left in a rage, we wouldn't be talking on the phone right now.

"You really want to know?" I laugh remembering what happened.

"Kinda." She answers and I take another breathe.

"Devin."

* * *

_"Santana is my best friend, and you, you're nothing to me." I clench my jaw and whip my body around to grab my bag behind me and quickly leave the blonde __trembling__._

_I get to the front door and chance a glance back at her down the hall. She's on the ground now, burying her face into her knees and I can see the slight vibrations coming off her shoulders. In any other situation I'd feel bad for the girl, I've never once seen anybody so broken down before. But this isn't any other situation, and I'm far from reaching out to help someone like her._

_I slam the front door shut and make my way to my car._

_"Mama?" I look up and see Devin hurrying over to me. "What the fuck is happening? Is everything okay?" he looked back at the house I just left and I can see the worry in his eyes, "Don't tell me-"_

_"No, she's fine. She's sleeping." I tell him, knowing that he thought something happened to the little girl. I fumble with the keys in my hand and turn to unlock my car. "Look I gotta go, I'm not really in the mood to talk."_

_"Is it because of Santana?" he asks and I look back at him. "Did she tell you about her? Britt's mentioned that she wanted to take it a step further. And honestly I personally wish she'd have done it sooner, seeing as I hate having to go to class with Santana and try my hardest not to blurt it out."_

_"You know Santana?" I ask him. How much have I missed of this whole charade? He nods and looks at me questioningly._

_"Yeah she's kinda like my friend now. Seriously though, what the hell happened? Why are you so upset? I thought you would be happy for Britt."_

_"I know Santana too." I tell him and his confusion deepens._

_"What? She introduced you two already?"_

_"She's my roommate." I deadpan and his mouth opens slightly in surprise. "And my best friend."_

_"Shit…"_

_"Shit is fucking right! She's fucking lying to her face and I had to sit through that dinner pretending to not know that she has a fucking kid!" I suddenly explode, "You know what I'm going to do? I'm going home! I'm gonna lay it all out for Santana and I'm gonna sit back and watch it unfold!" I throw my hands in the air dramatically. I reach for my door handle but Devin grabs my hand. I snap my head back towards him to glare but catch the seriousness displayed on his face._

_"I would never in my life ever hit a woman Sugar, but I do have a sister that I'm not afraid to call." He lets go of my hand and pulls out his phone as a warning._

_"You're fucking kidding me. Of course you would take Britt's side! You're her best friend! Well you know what? Santana is _my _best friend. I thought you said she was your friend too."_

_"Santana _is _my friend."_

_"Then why the fuck are you defending that lying bitch!" I yell back and he raises his phone at me again as a warning._

_"I _will_ use this phone. Don't make me do it. Call her a lying bitch one more fucking time, I swear to God I'll press send."_

_"What the fuuuuck!" I lean my back against my car in defeat._

_"Sugar," his voice a little more calm and I look at him, "Tell me what happened."_

_"She's been lying! That's what happened. She's been keeping the fact that she has a CHILD. How is this not registering in your brain? She told me that I have to play along like I don't even know her or I'll lose my job!" I roll my eyes, "But I don't even care anymore, I'll lose my job if I have to, I'm going to tell Santana. I can't keep this from her. I don't care how much Brittany tells me she cares for Santana, I'm not gonna fall for that shit! If she cared then don't you think mentioning the fact that she has a kid would be a pretty obvious thing to do?"_

_He tilts his head to the side, "Alright," he motions for me to lean back against my car and I do. "I'm gonna tell you something. It's not really the whole story but it'll probably be enough to get you back into that house over there." He points at Brittany's house._

_"Like that's gonna fucking happen. I told you, I'm done with this bullshit."_

_"Huh that's funny. That's exactly what Katie said." He laughs._

_"Who?"_

_"Brittany's ex potential girlfriend." He takes a step to my side and leans back against my car mirroring my own body. "She better not hate me for telling you this." He laughs and then proceeds to tell me the story of Katie._

_Turns out the girl was a total bitch. But Brittany fell for her hard. Of course, she didn't know the bitch side until after everything unraveled. Brittany had just given birth and after a few months of crying- which in turn prompted me to ask why but Devin shushed me and continued - Brittany went back out into the dating scene._

_"When she first met Katie, Brittany had just moved here and at the time, I've only known her for a couple of weeks at most." He looks at me, "Eric was her only best friend and we only met through him."_

_"I don't understand where this is going Devin." I sigh, and he shushes me again._

_"From day one, Britt never lied about having a daughter to Katie. Katie took the news well, she told Britt that it didn't matter to her. But really she was just using Brittany, stringing her along and making her believe that it was going to eventually be something serious. They would go on dates occasionally, and they'd hang out and Katie would even come over and help watch Britt's baby. Of course Brittany was always present at those times."_

"_You're gonna need to give me the cliff notes version of this story. I'm falling asleep here…" I roll my eyes. I honestly don't give a shit about what happened to Brittany at this point._

"_Look long story short, Katie broke her heart. Brittany was devastated afterwards. She spent so much time pinning over this bitch that she didn't even realize that she had been completely played. All Katie wanted was a few hookups a week and a couple hundred dollars for an 'emergency'. Brittany trusted this complete stranger to help her take care of her daughter and Katie just turns around and sleeps with basically anyone she can get her hands on."_

_He turns to me and leans his shoulder to my car, "Brittany told herself that from then on, she'll never open herself up to that again. She said that she was lucky that her daughter was still only a couple of months because at least she couldn't have grown attached to the bitch. Katie is the reason Brittany needs to know Santana's intentions. She's scared Sugar. Wouldn't you be if you were her? If you had a daughter, you would have not only your own but also your daughter's heart to think about."_

"_This is different Devin. Santana wouldn't do that to her."_

"_You know that and I know that. But Brittany doesn't know that. She needs to hear it from Santana."_

"_This doesn't explain her being so god damn mad at me and forcing me to play along like I didn't know her. I liked Brittany. I really did, but now I can't stand to be by her. I'm sorry that I went behind her back and broke her one rule about not leaving the house, but seriously it's not my fault that it gets way to boring in there."_

"_Wait you did what?" he asks, his eyes wide, "Oh man, you fucked up big time."_

_"Yeah I know." I tell him sarcastically. No shit I fucked up, I knew that a while ago._

_"No seriously. You really fucked up. Like majorly."_

_"Yeah I know!" I tell him again._

_"I'm serious."_

_"Yeah," I roll my eyes, "I know."_ _Are we having an actual conversation right now? Is he an idiot? I see him take a deep breath and he stands straight, facing me again._

_"The part of the story that I just told you only explains her protectiveness towards her heart. If you want the whole story, you're going to have to ask her yourself. It'll clear some things on why she blew up so badly after finding out that you've been taking her daughter out of the house without her knowledge." He pauses to laugh, "Which by the way, I got a black eye and a fractured rib from the one time I did it. Be lucky you're still walking."_

"_Are you serious?" I ask him. She hurt Devin that bad? Now I really don't want to go back in there._

"_Brittany's a good girl. To have been through what she's been through, and still be her crazy bubbly unicorn like self, it amazes me that she can't cure cancer. You know what I found out was her thesis for her GED exam essay?" He asks me and I shake my head, "Heart attacks are from loving too much." He chuckles, "Brittany has more heart than anybody I know, you just have to give her a chance to show it to you." He stands there silently for a few seconds before turning his face into a more serious look, "But I swear if you repeat anything I just said, I'll hunt you down."_

_He walks to his car that's parked on the curb, and opens the door, leaning in to grab something. When he turns around he throws it to me and I catch it. I fumble with the box of tissues in my hands curiously. I give Devin a questioning look and her smirks._

"_You're gonna need that for when you go back in there." I raise my eyebrow and he laughs, "For Brittany. Not you."_

* * *

"Mami! I'm home!" Santana calls from the hallway and I slowly move my sleepy form to the other couch. Just as she reaches the living room she smiles at me and kicks off her shoes.

"We have a place for those you know." I roll my eyes. I already know that'll be the one putting her shoes away anyways.

"But you always do it for me." she grins and sits on her favorite chair, positioning herself sideways, her legs hanging over one armrest and her head cushioned by the other.

"How was work?" I ask her, trying to start the conversation and making sure that it won't be steered towards a certain blonde.

"Boring. Where's Val?"

My body stiffens and I chance a look at the brunette. Her eyes are closed and I can tell that it was just a normal question.

"She's at home. I didn't really want to bring her here anymore."

"Is it because of Brittany?" She looks at me.

"What?" my voice squeaks. She can't possibly know.

"You know, because of what she said at dinner last week? I have to admit, she had a point." She shrugs and rests her head back down.

"Yeah, she did have a point."

"What do you think would happen if Val's mom ever found out?" she laughs.

Let's see now, what would happen? Oh that's right, _this._

"I don't know…" I stand up and Santana looks at me again, "I'm gonna go sleep early tonight. I'm pretty beat."

"Wait," she sits up with her hands holding her up from behind, "I wanted to talk to you about Brittany." She frowns. This is just too much. "When you left that night, you told me that she passed…"

"Yeah?"

"It didn't look as if you really thought that way…" she shifts back and brings her hands onto her laps, nervously fumbling her fingers.

"I was really mad that day Santana." I sigh. Okay think, how I could put this in words so that I'm not exactly lying. "I almost got fired that night."

"What!?"

"Yeah, Val's mom found out that I've been taking her out on more than one occasion, and she got real pissed and threatened to fire me. After what Brittany said, I guess I kinda just exploded. Sorry. That's why I left, I went to get my job back." Okay, that last part was a lie but whatever, I'm not completely lying.

"Oh. Did you get your job back?" Santana asks and I nod. "And Brittany really passes?" Her eyes light up and I smile at her.

"She's a keeper San. Really." I move to give her a warm hug and she returns it. When I pull away I kiss her on the cheek before making my way to my room.

Brittany better do this right. We've made our peace with each other. That night when everything blew up and I walked out on Brittany, I wanted to just scream. Scream at anyone or anything. But right now, I'm so thankful that I went back in.

Because I know now that no matter what, Brittany's intentions are pure. They always were and they always will be.

* * *

_"Brittany?" I slowly open her bedroom door and peek in. I can see her in her bed and I can hear her sniffling. Her back is facing me and I step in completely and close the door quietly._

_"Brittany, turn around."_

_"Why are you even here?" she whispers through a few sobs, "You already said what you needed to say."_

_"Yeah but you didn't." I tell her and sit at the bottom of the bed. She shuffles under the covers and sits up against her headboard._

_"I'm really sorry Sugar. I never wanted any of this to happen."_

_I watch__ her as she wipes her eyes hastily and I just know that she's telling the truth. Even though I know very little about Brittany, there's one thing that I've learned over the past couple of months, the simple fact that she doesn't hide her feelings._

"_Brittany, what happened?" I ask her softly. I needed to know why she got so mad at me for just taking her daughter just a couple of blocks down the neighborhood. She even hurt Devin for doing the same thing. There's no way that this is her true nature. Something had to have happened._

"_I've told you already. I'm just protective…" She shakes her head and bites her lip in a way that tells me that she's holding back._

"_Brittany, just tell me." I crawl to her side and tuck my feet into her sheets to keep them warm. She seems deep in thought for a while before she turns to me slightly and I can see her whole face completely._

"_I'm a horrible person. I feel like I don't deserve any of this." She says closing her eyes, making the new tears finally fall and I laugh internally at the fact that I came ready with a fresh box of tissues. I hand it to her and she blushes._

"_She's not yours, is she?" I whisper. Just like that the flood gates opened and now she's sobbing directly onto my shoulder. From the moment I met them, I had this feeling that she wasn't the biological mother. Her daughter looked nothing like her. _

_I let Brittany cry for a little longer until her breath eventually evened out and she regained composer. _

"_I was just supposed to be her surrogate." She looks away and her breathing picks up pace again. I sense that whatever she's about to tell me is straining all her energy to do so. I decide against interrupting her with my questions. _

"_Remember when I told you that I hired a tutor to get my GED so that I could go to work early?" She ask me and I nod. I only remember it because it was one of the very few conversations we actually had with each other. "The tutor I hired, him and his wife, are the biological parents."_

"_You were sixteen then, I don't even think that's legal for you to be their surrogate…"_

"_No, I got my GED when I was sixteen. Plus my baby girl is barely even two right now. The math wouldn't add up." She wipes her eyes of fresh tears and continues, "After two years of knowing them, they became sort of a family for me. Not so much as 'parents' but more like 'mentors'. We never lost touch even after I passed my GED exam. I found out that they've been trying for a baby but apparently something prevented them from doing so."_

"_So when you turned eighteen you offered to help." I finish knowingly. "Brittany that's a huge responsibility to take on, especially for an eighteen year old."_

"_I know, but I loved them so much. It hurt me to think that they couldn't have the one thing that they wanted more than anything in the world. I was eternally grateful that they helped me out and I just wanted to return the favor. As weird as it may sound, we all became really close to each other and it just felt like the right thing to do at the time. They told me that they'd only do it if they could help pay for my college."_

"_So what happened? Why are you the one that's taking care of their kid?" I ask her. Either something serious happened or those people are some seriously fucked up people._

"_I'll get to that." She waves her hand and I bite my tongue. "Anyways I agreed of course. I knew how important my education was to them. But then, a couple months before I was due," she pauses and I closes her eyes, taking a few deep calming breaths. "I told them to go on a quick vacation before the baby arrives. I read it somewhere that sometimes couples do that. You know, one last hoorah before endless nights and baby drool. I wanted them to enjoy their last months as a couple before becoming a family."_

_I watch her face carefully, noticing the pain and the guilt flashing through her eyes like never ending waves. It was almost too painful to watch._

"_They told me not to worry about them but," she wipes a stray tear, "but I pushed them to do it. I just kept telling them that it was the right thing to do and that they would be thanking me for it later." More tears fall and her hands work tirelessly to get rid of them, "I did this… It's all my fault." She whimpers and I turn to her completely, grabbing her hands. Her breathing has picked up and I feel like I just missed the most important part of the story._

"_Brittany now you lost me, I don't know what you're talking about. I thought I was following but now I don't know." I squeeze her hands._

"_They died on that trip!" she yanks her hands away and jumps off the bed. "They died Sugar. I told them, no, I pushed for them to go on that stupid trip. In fact, I was even the one to suggest driving to the vacation home! I told them to go, and I told them to get in that car!" she screams through more tears._

"_Brittany…"_

"_It was my fault that this all happened! You don't understand mama, I've been living with this guilt for two years now. Every time I look at that little girl in the other room, I'm reminded of how stupid I was. I took away her parents. I did that."_

_I move off of her bed and quickly pull her into a hug. I had no idea that she's been dealing with something like this. "Brittany, it's not your fault. It just happened that way. You can't keep blaming yourself for this. You have to think positive. You have a daughter, no matter DNA, you are her mother Brittany. No one can take that from you because you raised her."_

"_I didn't ask for any of this. I was 18 years old, I thought that I'd be going to college and going out all night. All of a sudden I'm taking care of a baby and I had no idea what to do. I wasn't prepared at all for this." She sobs into my shoulder. We stand like that for a moment and I just let her calm down. It must've been tough to go through that. She carried a baby for nine months, thinking that she would just be going back to her normal routine after, only to have her life practically taken from her by this whole other life._

"_How did you come to be her guardian?" I ask her as I pull away and bring her back to the bed to sit down._

"_They had to make a will when we first went through all the paperwork. I found out later that they named me to be the guardian should anything happen to them both. I didn't even know until after they died. They never asked me. In that same will though, I found that they left me everything else. They named me to receive their money, their house, everything, even the damn parking ticket that was never paid." She laughs softly. _

"_If seeing her everyday was such torture, then why didn't you just give up guardianship Britt? I'm sure they would have understood. You were young, you weren't ready for that type of commitment."_

"_I could never do that though. They left me one more thing besides all that other stuff." She stands and goes into the closet grabbing out a small envelope from a box. She takes out the small paper from it and unfolds it, eyeing it carefully. "I read it every day." she hands it to me and my eyes scan over the small piece of parchment. _

Our dearest Brittany,

We have been forced against our will to name someone as a guardian in case something should happen to the both of us. As much as it pains us to think that it would come down to this, we have decided that it's only best to listen and do as they say. They told us to just write a name but we both agreed that a letter would be more appropriate.

If you end up actually reading this letter, just know that our decision to name you guardian was the easiest decision we have ever made as a couple. We both have seen you grow from a scared young girl, to a beautiful, mature young woman in only two years. People would call us crazy to leave our future daughter in the hands of someone that we've only known in such a short time, but really, we know that this is the right choice. You have become more than family to us, and we are so glad to have met someone as strong, bright, and talented as you. You have blessed us with your never-ending kindness and love.

To think that our child would have to grow up without us is heartbreaking. So with that in mind, I know that you will do everything in your power to make sure that she is taken care of. No matter what happens, I know that you will love our child just as much as we do, if not, than more.

Protect her with everything that you are and never let her cry. Raise our daughter to become someone exactly like you, and exactly like us. Keep her safe and if you are ever stuck with nowhere to turn to, just remember that we will always be there, helping you along the way, looking out for the best, and most importantly, loving the both of you endlessly. You have such a big heart. Cherish that.

With all the love in the world,

Just us :)

_I wipe my cheek and soon realize just how much I'm actually crying. _

"_If anything were to happen to my little girl while you took her out," she begins and I'm too quick to cut her off._

"_I'm so sorry Brittany, I had no idea."_

"_She's the most important thing to me. I'm already responsible for what happened to her parents. I just can't have anything happen to her. I won't let anything happen. I need to keep her safe. Away from anything and everything…"_

_That definitely explains the freak out and Devin's fractured rib. I hand her the letter and she safely tucks it into the envelope before putting it back into the box. _

"_Brittany, you need to tell Santana, she'll understand." I grab her hand and bring her back down to sit next to me on the bed._

"_It's not that Sugar. I'm not worried that she won't understand." She shakes her head and closes her eyes._

"_Then tell me what it is." I tell her, rubbing her arm to keep her from breaking down completely again. She takes a few breaths to calm herself and opens her eyes._

"_I can't hurt my baby, Sugar. I'm not trying to justify my actions from tonight but you have to understand. I made a promise to keep her safe and happy. I can't have her open herself up to that much pain. If Santana were to be a part of this life and then suddenly leave, it would break my little girl's heart. I need to know for sure. I just need more time. I hope you can understand."_

_She falls back onto her bed and I do the same. Our legs are still dangling off the side and we lay there for a few minutes, just thinking silently to ourselves. How did this get so complicated so fast? Just this morning we talked like it was just a normal day, and now a whole day and an awkward dinner later, here we are. _

"_Do you really care for Santana?" I turn my head to look at the blonde next to me. _

"_I do." She whispers through a soft smile and I believe it. _

_Throughout this whole night I thought that Brittany was just being selfish and was off doing her own thing, lying and hurting those around her without a care in the world. But now I know that it was all for one thing. _

_Her daughter._

* * *

**AN: I really really like how this chapter turned out. Honestly, this one is my favorite so far. It just has so much emotion and we finally get to see what's been going on with Brittany. I know it's another short one, but there's only so much I could do with Sugar POV. Sorry...**

**I love all of you guys who have taken an interest with my story. You guys are awesome.**

**Al****s****o, I'm sad to say that you should maybe expect a delay in the next chapter update. I'm going through something right now and at this point, alcohol is the only solution for me. I'm gonna be in an awkward state of mind and I'm hoping that it won't affect my writing, but let's be honest, of course it will.**

**Please review. It might cheer me up enough :)**


	11. Dance For You

**AN: First of all, I want to apologize for the SUPER late update. Secondly, I want to say a huge thank you to everyone's kind words of encouragement! I can assure you that I'm definitely not drowning in alcohol. I'm slowly but surely getting back on track. I love all of you. Enjoy :)**

**Santana POV**

* * *

Chapter 11: Dance For You

"Night Britt." I smile at Brittany as I climb into bed.

"Night San." Brittany whispers and nestles further in the blankets. I see her yawn tiredly and I think it to be possibly the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life.

"I can't wait for tomorrow..." I tell her as I make myself comfortable in the blankets too. Quinn and Rachel are coming down to Hawaii to spend spring break with us. We've been planning it for quite some time now, and I can't wait to finally introduce Brittany to them in person. Really though, I'll finally be able to spend some time with Brittany.

"Me too San. I missed you so much." She frowns.

"I missed you too Britt. I can't believe it's been so damn long. Remind me to torture that boss of yours okay?" I half joke back and I see that smile of hers that I just can't seem to get enough of lately.

I turn to my side completely and run my fingers across the image of her face on my laptop screen sitting on my pillow beside me. I see her do the same and we both smile at each other. It sucks not being able to see her every day. But we've made it a point to Skype every night and fall asleep together.

"I wish I could kiss you goodnight." She whispers and I give her an understanding look.

"Me too babe. Me too..." I close my eyes and sleep takes us both for the night.

Call me crazy but I think somehow we seem to always have the same dream. I've never actually confirmed it or anything though because I didn't want to come off as psychotic if I were to ever ask her.

I just remember one night I dreamt that Brittany and I were in some music video and we were just dancing like crazy with each other. It was amazing. It _felt _amazing and so very _real_. I actually really started to believe it was real though when I called her that day and she started humming to the tune of 'Me Against The Music'.

When I asked her why she was singing it, she just laughed it off saying that it was stuck in her head when she woke up from the most amazing dream. I didn't push further than that.

"Santana!" I feel all the air leave my lungs as something lands right on my torso. "Wake up!"

I grab the pillow under my head and groan loudly into it. The noises stop but the weight is still on me. It felt sort of comforting so I decide to drift back off into sleep. Just as I'm about to completely fall back asleep, the pillow on my head is lifted off gently. I don't have the strength to open my eyes though. I feel the weight shift on top of me.

"Please wake up?" I recognize Brittany's voice close to my ear and a soft smile graces my face. I move my arms out of the blanket and loosely wrap them around her waist, pulling her closer.

"Sleep..." I beg and she giggles.

"It's almost noon baby. I left my Skype on after I woke up and when I came back to check on you, I saw you sleeping still so I just had to come and wake you up." she shifts so that she's lying to my side. She snuggles up to my side and kisses me on the cheek, "By the way, Stranger fell off the bed."

"What!?" My body snaps up immediately and I frantically search for him. I hear Brittany laughing loudly and I look back at her. She's lying down still but now she's clutching her stomach trying to contain herself.

"Oh, that was priceless! I should have recorded that!"

I slump back down and kick her ever so slightly, making her fall off the bed completely. She squeaks in surprise and lands with a loud thud. I grin softly to myself and bury myself back into my sheets and pillows. I reach around aimlessly and find Stranger, pulling him close too.

"Santana Lopez!" Sugar screams at me, "That's no way to treat your guest!"

I groan and move Stranger away again. I open my eyes and see Brittany pouting on the ground in the cutest way possible. I smile shyly and extend my hand out for her. She grabs it and I pull her back on the bed.

"Sorry..." I mumble and she giggles.

"Wake up San," she kisses me softly on the lips and I smile into it. "Your friends are gonna be here any minute and you're the only one still in bed."

"Tell them to go back to New York. I'm gonna be in here for a while."

"Oh no you're not." Sugar speaks up and moves to the side Brittany is on. "Come on Britt, now that she knows you're here, she'll have to get out of bed if you're no longer in it."

"Maybe if we told her lunch is already made and waiting?" Brittany laughs and gets off the bed.

"Nooo! Come back!" I try and reach for Brittany's hand but she moves it away faster.

"Santana wake up already. Quinn and Rachel are already on their way from the airport." Sugar puts her hands on her hips and I finally sit up.

"I hate you." I glare at her while I run my hands through my tangled hair. "It's spring break, I'm allowed to sleep in."

"I'm not gonna make you get out of bed, but just think about it, Rachel Berry is gonna be here. Do you really wanna let her talk to Brittany without you there?" Sugar looks at me knowingly.

"Oh God no." I get up and run straight to the bathroom. I need to be at least somewhat presentable by the time they show up. I'm going to cling to Brittany the whole time they're here. There's no way in hell am I going to let Rachel or Quinn embarrass me.

"Quinn just texted me." Sugar knocks on the bathroom door and I pause in the middle of brushing my teeth. "They said they're gonna be here in thirty!" she squeals and I roll my eyes.

After fifteen minutes, I stroll out of the bathroom and into the living room. I see Brittany occupying my special couch in the same fashion that I usually do and we smile at each other. I think I'm starting to like the idea of sharing everything with her and not even caring.

"Morning," I lean down and kiss her on the cheek. She brings her hands to cup my cheeks and pulls me down on top of her.

It's a little awkward because of her position already but we seem to manage to make it work after she moves to sit up correctly and I take my usual position, resting my head on the armrest and my legs hanging off the other side.

"Sugar!" I suddenly yell and I feel Brittany jump, "Sorry." I whisper to Brittany and she laughs shyly.

"What now?" Sugar appears at the doorway from the kitchen.

"Hungry..." I mumble and Brittany stifles a few giggles.

"Are you serious Santana?" Sugar rolls her eyes, "We can eat when Quinn and Rachel show up. Can't you wait like 10 more minutes?"

"Fine. They better have eaten on the plane though. I'm starving and I'm sure as hell not sharing anything with Berry if we end up not having enough to feed us all." I grumble and Brittany hits me softly to play nice.

"Can I go back to preparing lunch?" Sugar asks me and I flick my hand to tell her go. I needs my foods ready for me pronto.

The doorbell rings and Sugar points to the front door to signal for me to answer it. I groan loudly and get off of Brittany's lap.

"You're actually really excited aren't you?" Brittany asks as I look around the living room to double check if everything looks good.

"I'm not happy to see them. I hate those two."

"Who said anything about happy? I said _excited_." She smirks. I roll my eyes and grab her hand, pulling her along with me to the front door. I pause for a second and open the door, keeping Brittany out of sight behind the door.

"SANTANA!" Quinn jumps on me and I physically have to take two steps back to make sure we both don't fall over. "I missed you so much." She says softer and she slides back down to her feet.

"I missed you too Q. I'm so happy you guys came all the way down from New York." I look out the door and see a bunch of Taxis parked on the street. How much fucking clothes and shit did these two bring with them?

"Are you kidding me? Of course we came!" Rachel walks in holding the fluffiest cat I've ever seen.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?" I scream and point at it. They definitely did _not _mention the fact that they were bringing an animal with them.

"This is Javier." Rachel states matter of factly and places the thing on the floor. "I'm cat-sitting for a friend and I can't really cat-sit if I left him at home." She explains and I watch as it waddles through the hallway and into the living room with Rachel and Quinn following.

I hear Brittany laugh behind me and I turn to her, "Can you believe her? Do you understand why I'm such a bitch to her now?" I tell her and she just laughs more.

"I'm gonna grab their stuff from the cars!" Sugar yells quickly as she runs right past us and down to the cars. I'm not gonna help her though. Especially after seeing how many cars are out there.

"Rachel if I see that thing on my couch I'm gonna eat it for lunch!" I scream down the hall and begin to close the door behind me. I realize that it's not closing all the way and I look down and see a foot stopping it.

I raise my eyebrow at it and calculate in my head how quickly I can push Brittany out of the way and into safety so that I can attack whoever it is that decided to try and rob _this _house of all houses. Just then the door burst open, effectively breaking what little nail I do have on my pointer finger, and I see Kurt practically running past me. What the hell? I didn't know he was coming too.

"Where is she!?" He yells and I know he's talking about Brittany. I pull her behind me and hide her behind the door, "I know she's here! I can't believe Santana never introduced us yet!" I hear him yelling from the living room.

I tend to my broken nail and see Blaine walk in with his bags. "Blaine!" I scream and hug him. "I didn't know you guys were coming."

"Yeah it was a last minute decision." He smiles. He starts struggling with his bags so I yell for Kurt to come and help his boyfriend. Kurt shows up and grabs a few bags, and I manage to somehow keep Brittany hidden behind me from the two.

"How can they not see me?" Brittany laugh-whispers behind me and I try my best to keep my poker face on. I start to move the door to reveal her behind me but then it gets stuck again. I look back and see the biggest pair of lips forming that same huge guppy smile.

"SAM!" I yell and he steps forward, bringing me into a bone crunching hug. When he finally lets go I look behind him and to my surprise I see another familiar face walking up the driveway.

"MERCEDES!" I run up to her and hug her tightly. I guess I never realized how much I actually missed all my Lima friends until just now.

We both walk back into the house and see Brittany talking with everyone in the hallway. I guess she decided hiding is pretty pointless at this point. So many things are happening right now, I just can't keep track.

"Mercedes, this is Brittany, my girlfriend." I smile back at the blonde and she extends her hand out to shake.

"Honey, from what I hear, you're a part of this family. Which means you need to come over here and give me a hug." Mercedes laughs and pulls Brittany in for a hug.

"That means us too." Someone whispers behind me and my eyes widen in recognition. When I turn around I'm pretty sure I'm crying at this point. Am I drunk?

"My Asian babies!" I cry and they laugh as they smash me between the usual Asian sandwich hug.

When we all let go, I watch quietly as Brittany seems to mesh well with my rag tag bunch of friends. The whole scene is making my heart flutter in my chest. I'm so glad that everyone is receiving Brittany so well. I love my friends so much and they must know how much Brittany means to me.

I remember that the door is still open after I feel a small draft on my legs so I try to close the door one more time but yet again, as the fates would have it, it's stuck.

"MAKE WAY FOR THE PUCKASAURUS!" Puck yells as him and Finn rush past all of us with what I assume to be bags filled with alcohol drinks.

"Hey!" I yell at them and the halt their movements, slowly turning around with scared expressions. I keep my face strong and everyone around me starts to shift awkwardly. I lift my arms and smirk, "How about a hug first?" I ask and everyone smiles while they both come back and hug me.

"Damn, I was scared we were all gonna get Snix'd." Kurt laughs and everyone follows.

"Oh! I never got to ask you about that!" Brittany pipes up and turns to me. Everyone looks confused and Brittany laughs at the sudden shift in attention. "What is 'Snix'? I don't get it. It's your screen name for like everything." she starts to laugh but then sees everyone's reactions. She pauses and eyes everyone carefully, not understanding what's the big deal.

"Wait-" Kurt starts,

Then Blaine, "What-"

Then Mercedes, "How the hell-"

Followed by Sam, "Seriously-"

Next is Tina, "Is that even possible?"

Mike close behind, "Holy S-"

"SNIX." Puck saves.

Followed by Finn for big finish, "That thing slapped me in the face!"

"Alright guys! I get the point!" I throw my hands up and Brittany looks even more confused than before. I _actually _wish that Fabgay were here right now, hell, I'll even settle for Berry at this point. "I'm not that much of a bitch anymore guys." I tell them.

"Why would you guys call her a bitch?" Brittany glares at them and I find it endearing. "She's not a bitch. You shouldn't say things that aren't true..." It was cute to see her stand up for my honor.

"Wow." They all say in unison.

"Quinn! Is this the real Santana?" Puck yells and I can hear Quinn's laughs from the kitchen.

They all laugh along and make their way to the living room with their bags. I'm about to close the door but this time I actually check before even attempting to shut it. To my NOT surprise, I see Artie strolling up in his wheelchair with Sugar planted on his lap reading the newspaper.

"Where the hell are the bags? You said you were gonna bring them in!" I yell at her and Artie smiles in his usual dorky way.

"I found this instead." She motions to the newspaper, then to Artie and kisses him on the lips, "And this."

"It's good to see you Artie but I swear, if I hear anything going on at night, I'm gonna break your legs." I pause to think about how much of that made sense and hear Sugar and him stifle a laugh. "I'll rip your arms off Wheels. Don't. Push. Me."

"Yeah well then I'll just tell Brittany to give you no sweet lady kisses!" Sugar screams as Artie wheels them away. I keep my feet planted because I'm pretty sure no one has ever used 'no sweet lady kisses' as a threat before. I don't like it. At all.

"Where the hell did you get that damn newspaper? We're not even subscribed! That better not be Mrs. Clifton's one!"

"It's Rachel's!" she yells back and waves the paper in the air for a second. Damn that Rachel, what the hell is wrong with that girl? She _must _have some sort of disorder. SHE MUST. There's no other explanation.

"You're saying things out loud again." Brittany shows herself at the top of the hall with the widest smile I've ever seen on her. "It's cute to see you flustered around your friends."

"Did you know they were all coming?" I ask her as I walk up to her and we hold each other there, "You must've known something."

"_Well,_ Sugar _might _have mentioned that a few more people were coming." she shrugs.

"A few?" I scoff, "Babe, my whole Glee Club is here." I laugh.

"Yeah well, try not to let this so called 'Snix' out. I want everyone to enjoy themselves this next couple of days." she scrunches up her nose and I rock onto my toes to give it a light peck.

"Can't do that babe. If it's Snix they want, then it's snix they get." I smirk and let go off her completely. "Alright bitches! Whoever's stink ass feet I'm smelling, is gonna shower RIGHT NOW." I yell from the hall and Brittany giggles softly. I quickly kiss her before moving on into the living room.

"Snix!" Puck calls from MY couch and all I see is red at this point.

"OH HELL NO. _Quitas tu culo sucio fuera de mi sofá!" _[Remove your dirty ass off my couch!] I stalk over to him and he sinks into my seat even more._ "_It's _you_ that stinks isn't it! _Voy a matarte mientras duermes..." _[I will kill you in your sleep...] He clambers off of my seat after taking the hint from Sugar to just move the hell away from me. I keep my glare on him and he apologizes. "_No me gusta." _I mumble to myself as I pat my seat a few times.

"Hey where are our bags?" Finn asks innocently and I start fuming again. I snap my head around and look at him.

"YOU..." I point to him and then point at Puck, "YOU..." then to Mike, "ASIAN..." then to Blaine, "EYEBROWS..." and last but not least Sam, "GUPPY FACE." I motion to the front door, "GO."

They all stammer to their feet and nearly run to the front door to fetch everyone's bags. I sit down and make myself comfortable while we watch the boys come in one after the other carrying the many suitcases from the cars. I choose to ignore Kurt when he asks me why he wasn't singled out with the rest of the boys. When everyone's things are finally all inside, the boys take back their previous seats.

"Please explain to us how Brittany doesn't know who Snix is?" Mike asks Sugar and she just laughs. I start to look around for Brittany at the mention of her name because I realize that she didn't follow me from the hallway. Just then she saunters, _actually saunters, _into the living room with a pitcher of juice and cups and plants herself directly on top of me after putting it down on the coffee table.

"Brittany is a sexy magician." Sugar states and Brittany's face reads confused. Everyone else just listens on because they all know better to not be fazed by Sugar's explanations by now.

"I'm a what?" Brittany shifts off me to the side and I use the moment to grab myself a cup of juice. I taste it and I glance back at Brittany who's already looking at me, trying to gauge my reaction. I nod and she smiles even bigger than before. I knew she made it. It tastes delicious so she must've right?

"You're a magician. Or is it the circus one? The one that can tame any animal?" Sugar tries again and this time a few people can't stop the small chuckles they let out.

"I am not an animal!" I yell at them and go back to sit down on my seat but Brittany is now occupying all of it. I turn to look at her and she points to her lap.

"Sit." she tells me and I nod and do as she says, sitting on top of her lap.

"Holy shit..." Puck breathes out and I shoot him a glare.

"Baby," Tina hits Mike to get his attention, "How come you don't listen to me like that?"

"Yeah," Sam jokes as he nudges Mercedes and she just laughs at his dorkiness.

"Alright everyone," Rachel and Quinn walk in from the kitchen, "Enough picking on poor little San-San." Quinn smirks and I show her my favorite finger.

"Geez, you two never stop do you?" Rachel glares at Quinn who just shrugs. "Anyways," Rachel claps her hands and looks at the whole group, together again. "Family," she motions at all of us, "It's time for lunch."

* * *

"I think I'm dead." Kurt leans back and pats his stomach, "Blaine honey, can you check if I'm dead?" He flails his arm towards his boyfriend.

"Can't" Blaine groans, "I died after the first piece of cheesecake..."

"How many did you have?" Mercedes asks him and he sinks a little more into the seat.

"Four..." He mumbles softly but everyone hears it anyways making us all laugh.

"Your friends are silly." Brittany leans towards me and whispers close to my ear sending chills down my spine. All I can manage is to nod in response. "Are you okay?" she whispers and I nod again. "Do I make you nervous?" her hand lands on my thigh and my poker face fails for the first time ever.

"Santana? Are you okay?" Rachel asks from across the table and I try to spit back my usual snarky comment but my mouth is too dry to speak. Then I realize that my mouth is dry from it being left open.

"She's fine, just happy." Brittany speaks louder and even then she's still leaning close to my ear. I feel her hand move further up as she speaks, "you feel happy?" she asks me and I close my mouth and nod.

"I'm sure she's _very _happy." Quinn smirks. She's probably the only one who's catching onto what's actually happening to me. I try to glare back at her but Brittany's hand going further up my thigh is seriously distracting me. It's moving too slow for my liking.

"Britt..." I warn her. I don't know if I'm telling her to stop or if I'm telling her to just fucking do it already. I see her smile briefly before she leans in all the way to whisper in my ear.

"Sorry. I just can't help myself sometimes." her lips brush my ear and my eyes flutter shut for a few seconds. She moves completely away from me and removes her hand from my thigh and joins everyone's conversation.

Damn it. Why did I even say anything. Would it be weird for me to grab her hand and put it back at this point? Maybe we could sneak away and go to my room? No one would even know we left.

"So Santana," Quinn pulls me from my inner thoughts, "Who is bunking with who?"

My eyebrow immediately shoots up. "What kind of question is that? I have a bed. A very comfortable bed. A comfortable bed that is for me and only me. All you losers can sleep on the ground in the living room."

"What!?" Rachel asks.

"Hey not my fault. No one told me the whole gang was coming." I shrug.

"But you knew that at least Quinn and I were gonna be coming!"

"And that's exactly why I vacuumed the carpet." I smirk. "Because I care about the both of you, _dearly_."

"Ahem," Sugar raises her hand, "I was the one that vacuumed. You sat there and texted Brittany the whole time."

"How about we _all _just sleep in the living room?" Sam suggests, "It's pretty spacious in there, we could probably move the couches and table around to make room. Some people on the couches and some people on the floor?"

"That could work." I nod, "As long as no one sleeps on my couch."

"Why don't you just sleep on it then?" Kurt rolls his eyes.

"Because I have a BED." I tell him like it's the most obvious reason. "You can all slum it up in the living room if you want. I, on the other hand, will be snuggled up in my own bed."

"But you just agreed that we all sleep in the living room Santana." Mercedes shakes her head.

"I agreed for _you all _to sleep in the living room." I cross my arms over my chest and stand my ground. There is no way that I'm not sleeping in my own bed for the next few days.

"If you want to get your mack on, you just have to say so." Quinn grins and my cheeks heat up, "No need to pretend like it's actually the bed you want to sleep on every night." she wiggles her eyebrows and glances at Brittany.

"Shut the hell up Fabray. You don't know what you're talking about." I snap back quickly but not quickly enough. She hears the insecurity in my voice and her eyes challenge mine. She wins.

Damn it. I don't need this. This is gonna be so embarrassing.

"Oh my God..." She says through her smirk.

"Shut it Fabray!" I plead.

"What's happening right now?" Tina asks and everyone shrugs. I look at Brittany and she looks genuinely concerned now.

"Santana, don't tell me you didn't yet." Quinn speaks up again and my face flushes a deep red.

"Quinn! I mean it! Shut the hell up." I clench my jaw in embarrassment.

"Oh my god..." Puck joins in and I try my hardest to keep myself from burying my face in my hands to hide myself.

"I'm so lost." Artie speaks up and Sugar giggles. She leans in and whispers in his ear. I see his eyes widen in disbelief. "No way..."

"I feel left out..." Kurt frowns and Finn agrees with him. Suddenly half of the table is whispering to each other and everyone's eyes land on Brittany.

"So I'm gonna go use the bathroom..." Brittany looks around the table, "to see if I have anything on my face..." Everyone's eyes follow the blonde as she walks out of the room. Just as soon as she's out of sight, everyone turns to me.

"What!?" I roll my eyes.

"Is it true?" Tina asks.

"It is." Sugar answers for me and I throw her a glare. I make a mental note to torture her with something later. I don't know with what yet though. But I'll make sure it's good.

"I don't see what the big deal is..." I throw my hands up, "So what if Britt and I haven't had sex yet..." my face heats up again at the mention of doing that with Brittany.

"So what?" Puck sits up, "You're Santana Lopez." he tells me like that was supposed to be an actual explanation. "What the hell is stopping you? Girl is banging. Have you seen her? She looks like sex on legs, ON LEGS."

And that earns him a punch in the arm. In fact, make that three punches.

"Seriously though," Artie asks "Is she not giving you signs that she wants it?"

"She sure looks like she's giving you signs that she wants it." Quinn smirks again.

"Look I just want to take it slow okay? I just don't wanna fuck it up. I care about her." I look at my empty plate and play with my fork.

"I think it's really sweet." Mercedes smiles and Tina agrees. "The first time with someone is important. It's sweet that you want to do it right.

"It's very thoughtful of you Santana." Rachel chimes in and I roll my eyes at her.

"When did this turn into a _slumber party_?" Finn laughs and we all join in with him.

"Actually, I've been meaning to say something to you Finn. You too Rachel." I look at both of them.

"Santana it's okay." Rachel starts but I stop her.

"No I need to say it," I sit up and take a deep breath, "I've never officially apologized to the both of you. So I'm sorry. I used you," I look at Finn, "And I took something that meant something to you for my own personal reasons. You didn't deserve that." I turn to Rachel, "Rachel, I'm sorry that I told you about Finn and I. It wasn't my place and I'm truly sorry for how things played out."

"It's okay," Rachel smiles and I give her a confused look, "You may not want to believe it, but I do consider you my best friend. After everything that happened, shouldn't the fact that we're all here together right now already speak volumes as to how much we've all forgiven each other?" she chuckles and a few people nod in agreement.

"Santana," Finn speaks up, "No matter what happened, or even why it happened, I'm glad that you were my first. Sure at the time it didn't feel like anything. It felt meaningless. But when I think back on it now, the person who you became, you're so strong, Santana." he smiles. "You're always going to be important to me."

I look around the table and everyone is smiling softly now. It feels good to get everything off my chest.

"With that being said," Finn drops his head a little, "I need to officially apologize too." he takes a breath and looks at me, "I'm so sorry Santana. Senior year is supposed to be the best time of your life, but what I did to you..." he pauses again, "I never meant for any of that to happen. You have to know that. To find out that everything that happened to you was a direct result from my words in the middle of a crowded hallway, _I'm so sorry_..."

It becomes quiet after that. The memory of our senior year occupying all of our minds.

"Look on the bright side," I speak first, "If that hadn't happened, I would never have known that Taylor was such a bitch." I laugh.

It was true though. After I got outed, I chose to embrace myself fully and only then did I find out that Taylor was just using me. I get lost in my thoughts for so long that I realize that no one had said anything or even laughed along.

"What happened?" I ask as I look at everyone's faces. They just look shocked.

"That was the first time..." Sugar's eyes are wide, "That was the first time you've said her name since..."

"You said her name! Santana!" Quinn laughs and jumps from her seat and rushes over to me, "You said her name! And it was even as a joke!" She hugs me.

"Seriously? Is that why everyone is freaking out right now?" I laugh again.

"It's a big deal Santana!" Rachel claps her hands, "We need to celebrate!"

"What are we celebrating?" Brittany walks back into the living room and we all smile back at her.

"Life." Artie tells her and Sugar kisses him on the cheek.

"Love." Kurt smiles along with Blaine.

"Forgiveness." Finn smiles sweetly and Rachel agrees.

"Moving on." Puck laughs and Quinn follows through with a high five.

"Come here," I hold my arms out and Brittany makes her way to me.

"I seemed to have missed a lot..." She pouts and I lean forward and kiss her lips gently.

"I'll fill you in later." I tell her softly.

"WANKY!" Everyone screams and we all fall into a huge fit of laughter.

As lunch comes to a close, we seemed to have accomplished a lot as a group of friends. We've come so far together and it's only fitting for us to end up somehow forever connected to one another.

Honestly, the only thing that wasn't settled over lunch is the fact that we still don't know where everyone is sleeping...

We spend the rest of the afternoon moving around the furniture in the living room so that it could accompany everyone. No one brought up the fact that I wanted to sleep in my room because then that would imply that I want to do the deed with Brittany. Which would then mean that I'm already implying that she'll sleepover with everyone when I still haven't even asked yet.

"So are we really going out tonight?" Brittany asks everyone as she pours herself a cup of juice.

"I really want to!" Sugar almost screams.

"We should go dancing!" Mike joins her and everyone starts talking all at once.

"So I guess we're going dancing." I tell Brittany and she smiles shyly as she fidgets her fingers on her lap.

"Wait," I look at her carefully, "You're a dancer, Britt. Are you nervous?"

"I haven't gone dancing in so long..." she whispers, "What if I'm bad?"

"That's impossible babe." I grab her hand and give it a squeeze, "I've only seen you dance a few times now, but I can tell you're amazing. You're so talented Britt."

"Really?" She asks and I nod.

"As out of practice you may be, I'm sure you could even blow Mike out of the water." I jerk my head towards the Asian whose attention is on us now that he's heard his name.

_Knock Knock Knock_

I turn to look down the hallway to the front door. "Who the hell could that be?"

"I'll get it!" Sugar smiles and runs to the door. After a few seconds she comes back followed by Devin and Eric.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I look at Devin and he laughs.

"Why hello to you too Santana." He tells me sarcastically. I look at Eric and he offers me a small wave. He holds up the two cases of beer that are in his hands.

"Peace offering." he explains, "We came to crash your party." He laughs and Puck and Finn stand to introduce themselves, effectively grabbing the beer at the same time.

"Sorry." Brittany rubs my arm and I look back at her, "I invited them too. If we're going dancing then I need them with me. They kind of keep my in check. Eric makes sure I have as much fun as I can, and Devin makes sure I don't go home with anyone."

"Like hell, you're going home with someone." I instinctively wrap my arms around her waist and bring her close to me. "I'll make sure of that."

"Not even you?" Brittany wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and I let out a giggle.

"Only me." I tell her and she smiles before pressing her lips to mine. "How did they get here so fast? We only just confirmed to go out like literally a minute ago." I ask her and she blushes, "You already knew we were gonna go, didn't you?" She nods and I laugh, "You really want to dance again that badly?"

"I would've made sure of it." She smiles and kisses me again.

"Oh God." Devin grabs a beer, "Please stop. I already have to listen to Santana all class and Brittany while I'm trying to study."

"Don't listen to Devin, girls," Eric shoos Devin away, "He's just bitter because Joel couldn't come."

"Aww!" I coo at Devin and he turns around and holds his middle finger up at me. "Come on! Don't be like that!" I yell to his back as he disappears into the kitchen.

"So dancing tonight, yes?" Eric asks and we all nod. "Perfect. I need a good distraction. And by good distraction, I mean a hot guy." Eric laughs.

"Wow, I have no idea who both of you are but I like you guys already." Mercedes laughs.

"Woah, wait a minute," Kurt holds up his finger, "You're gay?"

"100 percent." Eric nods. "Devin too. Unless he's drunk. Then it's 95 percent." he laughs.

"Seriously?" Quinn pouts and Brittany and I both giggle.

"I need to get my gaydar checked..." Kurt says to himself. It wasn't surprising that no one caught it. They're both not as glaringly obvious as say Kurt or Blaine.

"Alright assholes," Devin walks back into the living room, "Who made the cheesecake and failed to call me?"

"Don't bitch and moan. There's like half a cheesecake left Devin." I tell him.

"Not anymore..." He responds softly and Brittany laughs again.

"Oh my God, you didn't!" I tell him and he laughs with a nod. "You fucking ate the rest!? I wanted at least one more!" I yell at him and he shrugs. I hate how Devin can pretty much eat whatever the fuck he wants. Sure he works out but still. Half of a damn cheesecake? I hate him.

"Well now you know that you need to have at least a whole other one whenever I come over." He tells me and everyone laughs.

"What the fuck. Okay no. We need to get ready and leave before this asshole eats all my food. I worked really hard to put this together too." I rant at everyone.

"AGAIN," Sugar raises her hand, "_You _did nothing Santana. I did pretty much everything. Even Rachel and Quinn helped out when they arrived. Brittany too!"

"Okay fine, I give up. I did nothing. I texted Britt the whole time. It's not like you complained."

"I did! I tried to take your phone away and you bit me!" Sugar yells and everyone laughs.

"Wow, you're an animal Santana..." Eric pats my head which in turn makes everyone laugh hysterically.

* * *

By the time we all get ready to go out, it's nearly 9pm. It's still early but now that I think about it, we haven't decided where we were going.

"Hey which club are we going to?" I ask Sugar and she shrugs. Truth is we actually haven't been in the club scene all that much in Hawaii so we both don't really know where's good.

"Oh I know the perfect place!" Brittany jumps up and down. "I used to go dancing there all the time. She hops over to me happily and whispers in my ear. I smile when she tells me the place.

"It's perfect."

"Oh wait," she frowns, "It's 21 and over only." she glances around not knowing if everyone is of age or at least has a fake.

"No it's cool," I tell her, "I actually know a bouncer that works there. He'll let us in, he kinda owes me one."

"Okay," Brittany nods. Her phone vibrates on the counter and she looks at it, "I'm gonna take this outside." she tells me and walks out the front door.

I watch her curiously and can't help but think that it somehow involves mama again. Just as I get the urge to stand up and follow her outside, Devin puts his hand on my shoulder.

"Hey, I need your help with something." He tells me. I see him glance to my side at where I know Eric is standing.

"Is it important? I was going to talk to Britt about something..." I tell him. I see Eric make his way outside and I sigh. I guess I can't talk to her about it now. "Oh never mind. I'll ask her later I guess."

"Oh sorry. I was just going to ask if we should cab it there or is anyone willing to drive?"

"Yeah we're not gonna drive tonight. I'm pretty sure we're all planning on drinking."

Three cars and thirty minutes later, we all step up to a decent sized club in the middle of Waikiki. I look around at all 14 of us standing outside of the building, all dressed up and ready to have fun.

"Are you sure we'll all get in, Santana?" Artie asks a little too loudly making me roll my eyes.

"Not if you continue to yell our business to the whole world." I shuffle his hair teasingly and he grunts in protest.

"Stop being mean to my boyfriend!" Sugar runs over and plants herself onto Artie's lap.

Brittany comes up from behind me and taps on my ass to get my attention. I turn around and she's pouting slightly. I giggle at her and give her a quick peck on the cheek.

"Alright guys!" Brittany turns to my friends, "Let's go inside. It's super cold right now and this ass needs to hit the dance floor." she slaps my ass harder this time making me yelp and everyone else laugh.

I shake my head at her and she smiles back innocently. I grab her hand and pull her to the entrance of the club. I glance back to make sure that my friends are following.

"Do my eyes deceive me? Is the almighty Santana Lopez really walking up to me?" I hear the deep voice boom from near the entrance. I turn around smiling in recognition.

"Greg." I greet him with a wink.

"Did you finally decide to take me up on my offer to go dancing with me? Sorry babe but I'm on the clock for the rest of the night."

"As if." I punch him lightly on the shoulder, "I'm here with my _girlfriend_, Brittany."

"Yeah, we're still here." Eric laughs behind me. I turn around and roll my eyes at him and the rest of my friends who are looking expectantly at me.

"Oh right," I motion behind me, "Them too."

"Alright. I _will _get you to dance with me one day Lopez, just you wait." Greg laughs and checks his guest list. "How many of you?"

"Sixteen."

"Are you kidding me?" He looks up and then glances behind me. "Who knew you _actually _had friends?" he laughs.

I hear Brittany laugh next to me and I'm pretty sure almost everyone behind me is giggling along with her. I look at her and frown a little. She tries to hold back her smile but fails. Instead she decides to kiss me on the cheek as a sorry.

"Brittany, you're in luck tonight. Brad is spinning tonight." Greg smiles at Brittany and I turn to her with confusion written all over me face. I know Brittany said she liked to come here before but I didn't think that she was _this _acquainted with the place.

"Really?" Brittany jumps up slightly, "I picked the perfect night to come back then!"

"Sure did. I'll make sure he knows you're here. Maybe he'll play you this new set that he's been dying to try out."

"Wait don't tell him!" Brittany holds her hand out to stop him, "I want to surprise him!"

"Alright, alright!" Greg laughs and holds his hands up in defense, "Go on then." He steps aside, "Dance with your girl!" He glances at me and Brittany thanks him quickly before pulling me into the club.

Pretty soon my ears are filled with the loud beats of the music and I see a crowd of people on a pretty decent sized dance floor. It's perfect because I don't like it when the dance floor is too big. It makes things awkward if there's not a lot of people. Plus if it's smaller it gives me more of a reason to dance closer to my friends. Well in this case, Brittany.

We stand around and wait for all of us to huddle closer to each other. Brittany is looking towards the DJ in the front and I see Mike doing his little, 'I wanna dance already, why am I not dancing right now?' shuffle.

"I'm going to look for a couple of booths!" Finn yells loud enough for everyone to hear and Puck and Artie decide to help him. Sam and Mercedes are completely ignoring us at this point and already started making their way towards a spot to dance.

"I'm going to go order drinks!" Eric turns away and heads to the bar.

"I'll make sure he doesn't get too much." Devin rolls his eyes and follows him.

Brittany squeezes my hand and I look back at her. She smiling widely at me and she brings me closer, wrapping her arms around my waist. "Can we go dance now?" she whispers into my ear.

"I just wanna make sure everyone is taken care of first, Britt." I tell her and look towards my other friends. I soon realize that it's only Brittany and I left standing alone. I look around and find Kurt, Blaine, Rachel and Quinn already dancing alongside Tina, Mike, Sam and Mercedes.

"This is my jam!" Artie shouts as he rolls up to the group and Sugar is straddling him while attempting to sing with the lyrics.

"_Now_will you dance with me?" Brittany smirks and pulls me with her to the dance floor.

The music is fast and we find a good rhythm easily. I have to constantly keep myself in check because holy fuck, Brittany dancing is better than sex itself. Everything she does on this dance floor makes me want to jump her.

"Here," Eric taps me on the shoulder and I spin around. Devin is beside him holding a few shots. He hands me a beer and I smile and tell him thank you. Devin goes up to Brittany and they both down a couple of shots each. "Britt doesn't do beer until she has a few shots in her." Eric explains and I laugh with him.

"Careful, she's a very touchy drunk." Devin smirks at me. I roll my eyes because I really wouldn't mind Brittany being all touchy with me tonight.

They walk away and I follow them with my eyes until I see them slide into a booth with the rest of the guys. I take a few sips from my beer and I feel Brittany press herself up against me from behind.

Her hands find my hips and she starts to sway our bodies together with the music. She moves my hair from my shoulder and my knees nearly buckle when feel her breathing on the now exposed skin.

"This song is _way _too fast..." she half whispers in the sexiest voice I think I've ever heard come from those lips. My head falls back and I hear her chuckle like she knows exactly what she's doing to me.

We dance like no one else is watching for a few more fast songs and I slowly become very aware of the fact that people are starting to notice and stare at us. I try to glare at as many people as I can because nobody is allowed to look at Brittany that way. Nobody but me of course.

It's also becoming harder and harder to resist having a full on make out session with Brittany right now, because yes, she really _is _a touchy drunk. Those shots apparently kicked in pretty fast for her.

"Alright everyone!" A man's voice fills the club through the speakers and Brittany releases her hold on me, "Tonight is a very special night..." Her and the DJ are looking at each other and she looks excited.

"I hope you're ready..." Devin suddenly reappears next to me. I give him a confused look and he laughs, shaking his head. "I probably should've warned you that she used to come here a lot about a year ago."

"My girl Britt is here tonight!" The DJ yells and Brittany blushes when a spotlight hits us. "Which only means one thing people..."

"Have fun!" Devin laughs and steps away from me quickly. I barely even have to time to register what he was saying when I feel Brittany grab my hand and raise it.

"I choose Santana!" she screams and I honestly think I'm scared for my life at this point.

"Well there you have it folks!" The DJ laughs, "the girl has spoken, you can all sit back down!" Suddenly, security makes their way across the dance floor and clear it of everyone but Brittany and I.

I look around and everyone seems to just be following along with what's happening. My eyes find my friends sitting at their booths and I can just barely make out Quinn giving me a thumbs up with her signature smirk.

"I know you're embarrassed right now," Brittany leans in and whispers to me, "But I promise you that you're gonna enjoy this. Brad just likes to go a little overboard sometimes."

"Alright! You all know the rules. Brittany gets a special dance with the person she chooses." The DJ, who I'm assuming is Brad now, speaks again, "And since I hear it's a very special partner tonight, we're gonna put a special selection of songs for the wheel."

"Wheel?" I ask Brittany and she shakes her head.

"There's no wheel," she giggles, "It's really just a playlist and it chooses a song randomly."

"So," I pause to try and put everything together, "You are so known here, that when you come you get to have a one on one dance with anyone you choose, and the song is chosen at random?" she nods, "And this happens often?"

"Only if I haven't visited in a long time." She giggles.

"And everyone just goes along with it? Everyone who comes here as regulars?" I ask her.

"Yep." she nods like this is actually normal.

"Oh alrighty then." I shrug sarcastically. This is so freaking awkward. How the hell am I supposed to dance next Brittany, sex on legs, in front of everyone here? Especially if I can barely keep myself in check dancing in the middle of a crowded dance floor.

"You might need this." Devin is next to me again and he hands me a shot. I take it and mutter a tiny thank you. I hadn't realized until now that I was actually kind of shaking at this point.

"Britt," I tug on her hand, "I don't really dance in front of people. I don't think I can do this..." I tell her and she turns to me and frowns. She brushes some of my hair behind my ear and I see her eyes glance up for a second. When her eyes find mine again, she's smiling.

"Well then tonight's your lucky night." She nods her head to screen behind me and I finally see the song that was chosen. My eyes widen and Brittany suddenly guides me over to where a chair is now positioned on the dance floor. "You won't be doing any dancing babe," Brittany winks at me seductively.

I'm going to die tonight. I know it. If I'm going to die from anything tonight, I'm pretty sure it would be because of Brittany, a chair, and Beyonce's 'Dance For You'...

"Let's get this party started." Brad speaks softly into the microphone and the music starts.

_I just wanna show you how much I appreciate you..._

Brittany straddles me and smirks. I make a mental note to keep my mouth from hitting the fucking floor and looking like an idiot. She drops her hips in sync when the first bass drops and rolls her body closer to mine.

_Wanna show you how much you got your girl feeling good..._

"I think we're going to have to reinstate the hands rule for now..." Brittany bends down and whispers into my ear. It isn't until then that I realized where my hands were. "You're definitely gonna get a bit too touchy." she grabs my hands from her ass and drops them to my side. I let them fall because let's face it, I have no control at this point.

_Wanna show you how much I hate being apart..._

She gets up and walks around my chair, leaving her hand on my body and letting it move across my chest. I know better than to try and follow her with my head, she's just going to push my head forward anyway, so I close my eyes. When she gets behind me completely, I feel her hands on my shoulders slowly make their way down my torso.

_Loving you is really all that's on my mind..._

It's almost as if her hands were on fire and they blazed a perfect path between my breast as she explored my body. I can feel her breath on my neck come closer as she goes down for only a brief second before she pulls back and her hands leave my body completely.

_Tonight I'm gonna dance for you..._

I open my eyes when I feel her body on mine again but this time my eyes land on her back instead. She slowly backs her ass up against my lap and I let out moan at the sight. Her body starts moving in delicious rhythm with the beat and she brings her hands up to her hair.

_Swirlin' on my babe, swirlin', swirlin' on my babe..._

She rolls her body back until her back is flush with my front and her hand grabs the back of my neck pulling me even closer. My lips find her neck and I inhale her scent. Her body is still moving to the music and I wish more than anything that I could somehow detach my eyes from my body just so I can see how sexy she is on top of me right now.

"Fuck..." I whimper into her skin and I can feel the vibrations of her moan on my lips. My idle hands decide to make use of themselves now and find their way to her thighs. Her legs are open and I use the opportunity to graze her inner thigh slightly. I feel her muscles tighten at the touch.

"Careful B," Brad speaks into the microphone, bringing me back to the reality of the situation, "Don't forget we're still here..." he laughs and everyone starts hollering and whistling.

I straighten myself on the chair again and feign indifference as to what's happening to me. Brittany gets off my lap and turns around before placing herself on top of me again. "You let me get too carried away..." she tells me and I see her eyes drop their gaze to my lips for a brief moment.

"And what are you gonna do about it?" I tease back and lick my lips.

She grins and bites her bottom lip, "Wouldn't you like to know." she grinds her body down one more time before getting off completely and walking right up to the bar, swaying her hips purposely.

"Fucking tease..." I mutter through the breath that I just realized I was holding. Everyone else in the club is yelling and screaming and I suddenly become very aware of the fact that I'm still glued to the chair beneath me.

"Are you going to be able to stand after that or do we have to hijack Artie's chair for you to use for the rest of the night?" Quinn laughs and punches me on the shoulder.

"Fuck off." I snap at her and stumble to my feet immediately. I falter a little and I hear Quinn laugh again.

"Damn Lopez!" Artie rolls over to us, "I'm pretty sure that counted as a sign that she wants it." He laughs and I resist the urge to slap him.

"Yeah," Puck walks up and nods, "If you don't hurry, I may have to step in for you..." he jokes and this time I don't resist the urge to slap him. "Shit!" He rubs his cheek, "I was fucking joking!"

I look away and try to find Brittany at the bar but she must've moved from the spot she was at. I step away from my friends and walk towards the bar. I finally see Brittany standing next to Sugar, talking with some girl I haven't seen before.

"Oh my god..." The girl's eyes widen and her mouth opens, "She doesn't fucking know does she?" the girl shakes her head and laughs. I see Brittany tense at the sounds and I don't know why but it makes me want to punch that evil laughing bitch.

"Katie, you don't know what you're talking about." Brittany tells her and I barely hear it. I start to walk faster to them. Katie's eyes flash to me coming at her for a second and smirks back at Brittany.

"Oh? That must be her?" Katie nods her head in my direction making Sugar and Brittany both look equally as scared. "What would happen if I were to, I don't know, _tell her_?" Katie laughs again and just as I'm about to reach them, I see her falling to the ground. It happened so fast that I barely had time to stop and ended up running straight into Sugar, who apparently, punched the bitch like there was no fucking tomorrow.

"_That's _what would happen! Stay the fuck away from Brittany and Santana you manipulative little bitch! Don't even think of it, you hear me? It's none of your damn business. You know why? Because you're a slut!" Sugar yells and Brittany grabs her by the arms and rushes her as far away from Katie. Sugar struggles of course and whips her head back to yell, "NOT ASPERGERS!"

"Mama!" Devin yells as him and Eric rush up to Sugar and grabs her by the shoulders. "What the hell!?"

"Let go!" Sugar shrugs off everyone's hands. "I'm fine!"

"Sugar let's go home." I tell her and she nods. We fetch everyone else and make our way outside.

"I'll see you later Greg!" I flash him a quick smile as I pass him.

The ride home is a quiet one. Everyone seems to be just as confused as me. Brittany, Sugar, Devin and Eric took the smaller cab back to the house while I'm smashed in this van with everyone else.

We originally took three cabs to the club but I didn't really want to wait for another one so I told everyone to shut the hell up and squeeze in. I'm pretty much regretting that decision now. I can't tell them that though. You know, pride and all.

It's weird that Sugar wanted to go with Brittany though. They barely knew each other. Even more so Devin and Eric. It's actually kind of weird to see that they got along so well so fast. It's almost as if they could've known each other before really. Especially Devin and Sugar.

_Wait a second... Back at the club... Did Devin call Sugar 'Mama'?_

* * *

**AN: Originally I planned to fit two chapters into this chapter but when I started writing it became clear that I honestly have no control over what happens in this story haha. I split it back in two so I'm sorry I didn't update earlier. I had it done for a while but I really wanted to try and fit everything. It might actually have to be three chapters... **

**Review please! These spring break chapters might take another chapter or two so let me know what you want! :)**


	12. The Answer Is Yes Part I

**Santana POV.**

* * *

Chapter 12: The Answer Is Yes Part I

_Mama._

I definitely heard it. Devin said the name 'Mama' when referring to Sugar. I don't even know what to make of that. My head is spinning from all the alcohol, but even more so from all the confusion. There are so many questions to ask. Who the hell was that girl earlier? What was it that she said I don't know yet? Why did Sugar punch her in the face for it? Why the hell did Devin call Sugar 'Mama'?

_What the hell is going on?_

"Santana?" Quinn's voice catches my attention and I strain my neck to look at her behind me, "Did you hear me?"

"No..." I tell her softly and shake my head.

"I was just asking what the hell is going on?" she repeats her question and I turn my head back to the front.

"I don't know..." I tell her. I honestly don't know.

* * *

I walk into the house with everyone and see Devin and Eric sitting on the couch. I look around for Brittany and Sugar but they seem to be missing. Devin understands my silence and nods his head toward Sugars bedroom door, telling me that they're in there.

My phone vibrates in my pocket and I pull it out. Greg's name flashes on my screen. Why is he calling me? I must've forgot something at the club maybe.

"Hello?" I answer.

"Santana, I just heard." His voice is low but still loud. He sounds mad yet concerned, "Shit I'm so sorry. I didn't know she was there. I take one damn piss break and that bitch takes the opportunity to slip past the other bouncer..."

"Greg, what the fuck are you talking about?" I turn away from the living room and walk into the kitchen to be alone.

"Katie! She would have never gotten in if I never left my post." he explains and it surprisingly doesn't help my confusion.

"Katie? Who the fuck is this Katie bitch? And why the hell did my best friend feel the need to punch her in the fucking face?" How is it that everyone knows what's happening but me? Bar all my other friends of course. If anything, they're even more confused than me.

"She's the reason Brittany stopped coming." Greg tells me like it's obvious, "Look I gotta go. Tell B I said sorry okay?"

_Click_

I stare at my phone for a good three minutes. I feel like I want to throw it but I don't know why. Which in turn makes me want to throw it even more. I need answers.

"Santana?" I turn around and see Devin eyeing me curiously. "What are doing?"

"You called her Mama." I tell him and his eyes widen slightly.

"What?"

"Why did you call my best friend Mama?" I reiterate. "You called _my best friend_, whom you've only met today, a name that I've been questioning Brittany, _your best friend_, about for at least over two months now.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Santana." He steps back and his face holds a hard expression.

"You called her Mama!" I yell whisper. "I heard you say it Devin." I fold my arms over my chest.

"I never called her 'Mama'. I barely even know her. I called her by her last name." I see his face falter slightly but he recovers, "It's 'Motta' isn't it? I called her 'Motta'." He pats me on the top of my head, "You should check those ears of yours." he laughs and walks out of the kitchen.

_Motta_? Did I really just imagine it?

I shake off my thoughts of doubt and walk back into the living room to make sure everyone is taken care of for the night. I realize now how long I actually was in the kitchen because everyone is passed out on the floor now.

I laugh when I see Devin and Eric who both probably fought hard over who would get the blanket, with Eric obviously losing. Artie is passed out on one of the couches and Rachel and Quinn are sharing the other. I guess no one dared to take my recliner. I take a step closer and suddenly become aware that someone _is_ occupying it though. Or more like _something_.

I hiss at Rachel's stupid cat and it literally just looks at me like I'm the idiot. Fucking cat. I'm actually quite terrified of cats to be honest. They scare the shit out of me. They have claws. CLAWS. Don't trust anything with claws.

"You're doing it again." Brittany speaks up making me jump in my place. I turn to face her and she giggles adorably. She's leaning against Sugar's doorframe and crossing her arms over her chest.

"Doing what again?" I ask as I walk towards her.

"Saying things out loud. It's really cute." she uncrosses her arms and holds her hand out. I grab it and she pulls me into an embrace. "I'm sorry." she whispers and I pull my head back to look her in the eyes.

"For what?"

"For ruining your night. We were supposed to be out having fun but instead I kinda sorta caused a fight..." she frowns.

"Well the night is still young," I smile and turn to look at the clock behind me, "It's only about eleven now." I tell her and her frown deepens. Her eyes slowly move up to the clock and then back to me.

"I can't stay though..." she lets go of me and leads the both of us to the front door. Only stopping to pull the blanket off of Devin and put it on Eric, making both of us laugh. "I wasn't even planning on staying out this late." she tells me as she steps out into the cold air.

"What about tomorrow?" I ask her.

"I'll be here tomorrow." she smiles. "Bright and early." she jumps a little making me smile too.

"You should tell Joel and Ryan to stop by too. How come they couldn't come tonight?" I question and her face falls for a second.

"Oh," she breathes, "They were helping out a friend all day. They just couldn't make it." she explains, uncomfortably shifting from one foot to the other..

"Well what about tomorrow? We're gonna go hiking right? They should come." I try again.

"Yeah, maybe..." she breathes again. "Ryan wont be able to make it though. It's Ryan and," she pauses, "It's Ryan's monthly shopping day." she concludes.

"What does that mean?" I ask her curiously and she smiles.

"It means that you and I get to spend all day with each other. But I'm sure Devin will make sure Joel comes. If we're going where I think we're going, he's gonna make it an 'in vitro' date." she laughs.

"A what?" I smile and think about what she actually meant, "Incognito you mean?"

"Is that the one with Joseph Gordon-Levitt?" she tilts her head to the side. Is she talking about _Inception_? I can't help the giggle I let out and shake my head at her adorableness.

"Would it even be considered a date if there's everyone else around?" I shake my head at Devin's dating abilities.

"Not really. But we're talking about Devin. He considers any day a good day as long as Joel speaks to him." She laughs. "I'm sure he's gonna wake up with a _huge_headache tomorrow morning though. Probably Sugar too."

"Yeah, what the hell happened tonight by the way? I've never seen her act like that before."

"It wasn't Sugar's fault." she quickly tells me, "It was Katie." she shakes her head, realizing that I still have no idea who the hell this Katie character is, "She's not important. I had a thing for her once but it's over. When she approached me at the bar, Sugar was next to me and I guess Katie just said the wrong thing to her."

"Do I have to worry about this Katie girl?" I ask shyly. "She seemed very _determined_earlier..."

Brittany senses my insecurity and smiles softly at me. "You have nothing to worry about," She steps forward and hugs me again, "Nothing at all. Now go make sure Sugar is okay. It's about time you do something nice for her. You're always so mean to her." she giggles before letting go.

"Yeah, yeah." I roll my eyes. "I'm not _that_mean to Sugar, I just make her do everything that I don't want to do."

"Which is everything..." Brittany cuts in. I just shrug because even I can't deny that.

"Drive home safe?" I tell her and she leans in again.

"Always." she whispers and I meet her halfway, kissing her the way I've wanted to all night.

"Night Britt-Britt." I pull away slightly and my lips ghost hers. I feel her smile and I think I love feeling her smile more than actually seeing it. I think it's because I know she's smiling because of me. For me. And it's always right after every kiss.

"Night San."

I watch her as she drives away and I feel pathetic for missing her so much already. When the hell did I get so damn sappy?

"It's okay to miss her you know." Rachel steps next to me and eyes the empty street in front of us. Brittany's car long gone now. The only thing left to catch our attention is the subtle flickering of the street light.

"Is it?" I ask her. I lean against the wall next to the door. Rachel moves completely out of the door and nudges me to make room for her too, closing the door behind her. "What happens if I miss her too much?"

"Santana, when you open yourself up to be loved, you're opening yourself to hurt too. You just have to decide if they're worth it. Is she worth it?" she asks.

I stare at the empty street in front of us, "What do you mean?" I ask her even though I already know the answer.

"Do you love her?" I feel my heart jump out of my chest for a split second. To just _hear _that damn word, it scares me. She chuckles, "It really does suck sometimes."

"Why's that?"

"To give someone that power over you, to give them the power to hurt you and trust that they won't use it, it's incredible. But more than anything, it's terrifying." I can hear the pain in her voice.

"Was it worth it?" I ask her. "If you're speaking from experience, was it worth it? You and Finn?" I turn to her and she smiles back at me.

"It was," she nods, "Every second of it was worth it. _He_was worth it, Santana. Just because it didn't work out doesn't mean that it was all for nothing."

"Taylor was all for nothing." I close my eyes and prepare myself for the conversation about to happen. I never talked about her. I ignored everyone's questions when it happened.

Rachel cautiously looks up at me and I roll my eyes. She wasn't expecting me to bring it up. Me too apparently because I suddenly feel very uncomfortable. Strangely enough though, it's not the 'I'm talking about my broken heart' uncomfortable, it's more like a 'Why the hell am I talking to Rachel of all people about this?' uncomfortable. It's probably because of the fact that my heart isn't broken, not anymore at least.

"It wasn't for nothing, Santana. You wanna know what came out from the whole relationship?" She smiles knowingly. Like she's got my life figured out more than I do.

"What?" I ask doubtfully.

"You." she nods proudly and I stare at her blankly.

"Was that supposed to be a joke!?" I burst into laughter, "Because that was pretty good."

"I'm serious, Santana!" Rachel punches me and I rub my shoulder, "It wasn't a pun!" she yells again and I laugh louder.

"She's just laughing because she knows it's true." Quinn opens the door and smirks at me, making me halt my laughing. "Here Rach," She hands Rachel a small blanket and Rachel uses it to cover her shoulders.

"Such a good girlfriend." I scoff at the two and Quinn just rolls her eyes.

"Better than you." Rachel glares at me.

"How would you know?" I glare back.

"I'll never understand this friendship dynamic." Quinn laughs. "One minute having a serious conversation, next minute cutting each others throat." she shakes her head.

"I hope it never changes." Sugar comes up behind Quinn and wraps her arms around Quinn's shoulders. "You guys are too boring by yourselves." She deadpans, "Sorry, Aspergers."

"You're not so fresh yourself," I grin at Sugar and she giggles.

"Are you guys done bonding now? I kinda wanna go to sleep." Sugar asks and Quinn and Rachel look at her curiously.

"Her bedroom window is right there." I tell them and point to the window a couple of feet from the front door. They nod their heads in understanding.

"You don't even want to know how many times I caught this one trying to sneak out," Sugar points at me and I look at her in disbelief.

"Such a liar!" I raise my voice, "I have never snuck out. Plus, it's not considered sneaking out if I just walk right out the front door. I don't have a damn curfew. I can go out whenever the hell I want."

"Woah, calm down Santana!" Quinn grabs my face with her hands. "She was _joking_." She eyes my face carefully as if inspecting it, "Maybe you _should_go to sleep, you definitely need the beauty." she laughs and I feign a gasp.

"You guys suck. Here I was trying to have a heart to heart and you guys have to come around and ruin it." I glare at all of them.

"Well, to put it in Rachel's words, 'You opened yourself up to it.' I'd say we just helped make her point." Quinn laughs and walks back into the house, pulling Sugar with her.

"Please tell me why I agreed to let you two come down for spring break?" I ask Rachel and she shrugs.

"Like you would've actually turned us away? I know you missed me, Santana." She nudges my shoulder before walking back inside.

She's right though, I wouldn't have said no to them. Plus if they didn't come down, I wouldn't have been surprise attacked by the rest of the glee club. As much as I hate them all, I love them just as much.

I stay outside in the cold for a good ten minutes before heading back inside. I maneuver my way over everyone on the floor and make my way to my bedroom. I go through my nightly routine and change into comfortable sleeping clothes. I see my phone light up from across the room where it's being charged so I go over to read the new message.

_[B:] Ready?_

I smile as I text Brittany back. I was hoping we were going to video chat tonight but I didn't think we were going to seeing as we basically spent half the day together already. I grab my computer and position it on my pillow. We soon fall asleep in our usual way.

* * *

_Click_

_Click_

_Click_

I keep hearing this clicking noise and it's really starting to annoy me. Then again, I'm never a morning person. Whatever is making that noise though needs to die.

_Click_

I hear it again but this time it followed by laughter. My eyes snap open at the sound because I definitely recognise the laughing. Rachel's laughing is what they loop over the speakers in hell. Except when I open my eyes, I'm meet with everyone's faces. Damn it! How the hell did they get in my room?

"Morning, sunshine!" Kurt sings and I throw a pillow at him quickly to shut him up before they start an impromptu performance. God knows I don't need that to wake me up.

"What the hell are you all doing in my room!? Get the hell out!" I yell at them and point to my door. That's when I see Brittany standing in the threshold, trying to hide her laughter. I shoot her a glare and she laughs even more.

"S, look how cute you look! I'm gonna send it to your mom!" Quinn shoves her phone in my face and I realize that the clicking noise was her camera on her phone. I have to blink a few times before the picture comes into focus. I'm in my bed cuddling Stranger and facing my computer. But most importantly, _I'm cuddling Stranger._

"What the fuck, Fabray!" I quickly try to grab the phone from her hands but she snatches it away just as quickly.

"Oh Santana," Mercedes laughs and holds up her phone, "That's not the only copy." she smirks.

"Yep," Tina joins in and holds her phone up too. Soon everyone is holding up their phones with the picture on full display.

"Even I got one..." Devin walks in drinking a glass of water and rubbing his head. "And before you ask," he points to me, "No, I'm not ever deleting it, and yes I will blackmail you."

"I think it's cute." Brittany finally moves from her spot and sits next to me on the bed. She kisses my temple and then shows me her phone. It's her new background image. Of course she would.

"Really babe? Does it have to be your background?" I ask her with pleading eyes.

"It's only fair," she smiles at me knowingly, "I'm yours."

"Seriously?" Quinn interrupts, "Lemme see!" she goes for my nightstand and grabs my phone. When she turns the screen on everyone huddles closer to see what it is.

A collective "Awwwww" is heard for a good thirty seconds. I smile proudly at the fact that I was able to sneak a picture of Brittany in the middle of class with her classic 'I'm learning' face. Her hair is up in a messy pony tail and out of the way, her bangs loose from the tie and side swept across her forehead, eyebrows furrowed, her pencil touching the tip of her nose, her tongue sticking out slightly and in between her teeth, and her notebook open on the table.

It's possibly the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life. No. It _is_ the most adorable thing. _She_is the most adorable thing.

"I gotta ask though," Sam comes around the bed and eyes Stranger, "What's with the dinosaur?" he pokes Stranger awkwardly and I resist slapping his hand away and protecting my stuffed friend. Because that would be what crazy people do.

"Oh that? I just won him at the fair a while back." I shrug nonchalantly.

"Can I have it then!?" Mike jumps and grabs Stranger away.

"What the fuck!? Hell no!" I jump out of bed and rip Stranger from his weird dinosaur stealing hands. "Stranger is mine!" I get back into bed and place Stranger back carefully where he was.

_Silence_

I cautiously look around and everyone's faces look priceless. Devin is the first to break the silence when he fails to hold back his laugh and soon after everyone follows.

"Damn Lopez, what the hell was that?" Puck laughs.

"Okay everyone needs to get out." I glare at all of them and they all hold their hands up in surrender as they walk out. "Not you though," I grab Brittany's hand and bring her back onto the bed, "Only you can stay."

"You know you have to get up sooner or later right? This is like my only completely full day off from everything and I'm not going to spend it in bed." She gets up and pulls me to my feet, "Now go get ready, we have a big day ahead of us."

* * *

"Why is everyone standing and eating?" I walk into the kitchen and eye everyone curiously.

"No one wanted to help clean up so I'm making them stand." Sugar tells me from the sink. That's when I see Quinn and Devin slumping over and poking at the bacon on their plates with their forks.

"What's up with those two?" I ask Blaine and he looks up from his plate and shakes his head.

"It's turkey bacon." He explains and I make an 'o' shape with my mouth in understanding.

"Why didn't they just make the regular bacon if they're going to be so depressed about it.?" I ask and he glances at Rachel.

"Rachel threw it away," he whispers and my eyes widen, "She said it's not healthy."

"She did what?" I turn quickly and burn a path straight to Rachel. I stop when she holds up her phone and I see my picture on the screen.

"It's ready to be sent to every one of my contacts." she threatens and hovers her thumb right above the 'Send' button.

"One day, Hobbit." I warn her.

Brittany comes up next to me and kisses me on the temple again and wraps her arms around me. "Baby, put Snix away, you need to eat." she places a plate of food in my hands and I thank her with a kiss.

"Don't do it, Santana." Devin looks up with sad eyes, "It's turkey bacon. TURKEY BACON."

"It's true," Quinn looks up in the same fashion, "I thought this break would be a vacation from Rachel's diet food that she always makes me eat, but it's not. IT'S NOT, SANTANA."

"Woah," I breathe.

"Tell me about it," Brittany laughs, "They've been like this from the moment Rachel threw away the regular bacon."

Sugar finishes up the rest of the dishes and walks over to us. We all stand there and watch as Devin and Quinn slowly shovel the turkey bacon into their mouths. With every bite their whimpers growing louder and louder.

"Who died?" Joel suddenly appears next to us and we all jump. He laughs and looks at Sugar and I, "You should really learn to lock your doors."

I look around and realize someone is missing, "Where did Eric go?" I ask.

"Oh." Joel starts, "He's with Ryan and," he pauses, "He's with Ryan." I see him look at Brittany and I glance between the two of them.

"He always goes with him on his monthly shopping sprees to make sure he doesn't spend too much." Brittany explains further.

"Isn't that the point of a shopping spree?" I ask them and they shake their head.

"Yeah but it's not healthy to do it every month." Brittany laughs.

"Please," Blaine interrupts, "Kurt goes on shopping sprees _weekly_."

"Yeah but you guys live in New York. We live in Hawaii. There's not many places to go on a shopping spree before you have everything from everywhere. I must admit though, it's really fun to go with Ryan and Eric sometimes."

"Why? They're so opposite, they'd fight the whole time." I ask him and he shares a look with Brittany.

"Exactly."

* * *

_At Brittany's house..._

"Guess who's here!?." Eric's voice booms loudly throughout the walls of Brittany's house.

"Uncle Eric!" the little girl runs out of her bedroom and jumps into Eric's arms. He bends down and places her back on the ground as he positions himself cross-legged.

"Excuse me missy," Ryan turns from the kitchen and holds his spatula up, "Did you brush your teeth?"

"Si," she responds with a nod of her head.

"Made your bed?" he questions further and she responds in the same.

"Ate your breakfast?" Eric tickles her and she squirms in his hands.

"Mhm," she smiles, "Mommy made it for me when we woke up."

"Oh yeah?" Eric laughs, "What did you eat?"

"Yogurt and fruits!" she rolls onto the balls of her feet, "Is today what I think it is?" she asks Eric and he smiles.

"What day do you think it is?" he plays along and she smiles even wider.

"Shopping day?"

"Why would you think that?" he glances at Ryan and they share a smile.

"Because mommy said she'll be gone the whole day. And she only does that for school, work, or shopping day." She explains to him like it's obvious.

"Oh yeah?" He tilts his head in confusion.

"Yep. She says shopping days are her breaks." She looks up to the ceiling in thought as she tries to remember something, "It's my job to keep Uncle Ryan, Uncle Eric, Uncle Joel and Uncle Devin away from her." She speaks as if she's reciting what Brittany told her to say and frowns, "But don't tell her I told you that. It's supposed to be our secret."

Eric's face drops and Ryan laughs from the kitchen.

"Where is Uncle Devin and Uncle Joel?" SHe quickly looks around the room, "They're not with mommy right?" she asks worriedly.

Eric shakes his head and Ryan walks in from the kitchen, "No sweetie," Ryan laughs, "They're on an 'In vitro' date."

* * *

"So what's on the agenda today?" Finn asks Rachel and everyone turns their attention to her expectantly.

"Why are you asking me?" Rachel rolls her eyes.

"Come on Rachel," Tina laughs, "You're you. We all know you have an itinerary."

Rachel huffs and crosses her arms over her chest in protest. "Just because I'm known to be organized doesn't mean I made an itinerary for this trip. I know how to let loose and be spontaneous."

"Oh right on time," Quinn walks into the living room holding what looks to be stapled sheets of paper and points at it, "10:00 am : Let loose and be spontaneous." she smirks and Rachel snatches the sheets of paper from her.

"I only made this in case we got stuck on deciding what to do." she glares at Quinn.

"Whatever Frodo just tell them already. We already talked about it yesterday." I snap my fingers to hurry her up.

"Actually," Rachel smiles at Brittany, "I decided to let Brittany, Devin and Joel lead us around today." I look at Brittany and she nods, "It's come to my attention that neither you nor Sugar know your way around the island." Rachel explains.

"Everyone's gonna want to wear something comfortable with shoes you don't mind getting a little dirty." Brittany directs everyone and Kurt looks scared. "And also," Brittany smiles, "Don't forget your swimsuits."

* * *

"So we figured we'd start you all off with a simple hike," Brittany speaks up as we all get out of the cars. We used three cars again, Brittany's, Sugar's, and Devin's. I look around the residential neighborhood and smile.

"It's really simple," Devin looks at the entrance of the hike, "the first ten minutes is pretty uphill, but from then on it's should be okay. If someone could carry Artie all the way though, that would be great. I don't want to chance anything."

"I got it," Puck raises his hand and goes over to Artie.

"We won't need his wheelchair," Joel stops Finn from grabbing it, "There's a place he can sit at the top."

"Where are we?" Mike asks as he looks around.

"Pillboxes." Devin pats him on the back and points in the direction of the trail before walking away with Joel and right up to the entrance.

"I don't understand," Mike looks even more confused as before and Tina laughs next to him.

"I'm with you on that one." I laugh. Brittany just rolls her eyes and tells everyone to just follow along as she pulls me to the entrance.

I can see Devin and Joel already making their way up the steep hill so we soon follow after them. He was right about it being a little tough in the beginning. I don't think my thighs have felt this much pain since Coach Sue. I'm glad there's a rope lining some parts of the climb because I'm pretty sure I would've fallen by now.

"Can't keep up?" Brittany smirks back at me and I look up at her. A small dog runs past me and jumps on top a huge rock along the edge of the trail.

"Oh my God! Look at the doggy!" Sugar point from behind me, "Aww it's hiking too!" She swoons over the small dog. She pats my butt and I turn to look at her, "Hurry up! I wanna pet it."

"Babe, you don't even know whose dog that is..." Artie calls from over Puck's shoulder and Sugar pouts.

"No it's okay," A man at the bottom of the trail waves his hand and laughs, "She likes the attention. Her name is Ellie."

"Hey Ellie, come here baby girl," I call out to her and she shakes her tail faster. "Aww you're so cute." I run my hand over the top of her head.

"Hey Santana," Puck interrupts me, "You mind finishing your play date when we reach more stable ground? Wheels isn't as light as he looks." he laughs making Artie scoff.

I pat Ellie one more time and continue up the trail. After a few minutes of climbing I can see where the trees that line the beginning part of the trail stop. That's probably where the 'hard part' of the hike ends.

"M'lady," Brittany holds her hand out for me when I reach the top. I gladly take hold of it and she pulls me the last few steps up. "You can't see the bunkers yet but you will soon." she tells me and I still have no idea what she's talking about.

"Oh finally!" Kurt pats his designer capri pants when he reaches the dirt path, "Brittany, you never mentioned that It would be muddy." he lifts his shoes up and eyes the small amount of mud at the bottom.

"Honey," Blaine holds his boyfriend up so he doesn't fall back into the steep hill, "She did say to wear shoes you don't mind getting dirty." he tells him and Kurt scoffs.

"As if I would own anything like that!" he throws his hands up after giving up on cleaning his shoes in the middle of a dirt trail.

"What about those outfits that you used to wear back in high school when you didn't mind me throwing you in the dumpster?" Puck questions like the idiot he is.

"When I didn't mind!?" Kurt mocks him with a raised voice, "Did I give you that impression, because I'm pretty sure I minded!"

"Okay porcelain, calm yourself." I laugh.

"How about we just continue the hike?" Brittany tries to lighten the mood. I nod and keep ahold of her hand in mine as we continue up the trail. "Are you all always like this to one another?" she whispers and I chuckle.

"You should've seen us throughout high school," I tell her, "It was so bad it's like we deserved our very own poorly written television show on Fox."

"Hey don't say that," Brittany giggles, "Fox isn't that bad." she speaks in a serious tone and I look at her for a good ten seconds before we both burst into laughter.

"Joking aside, I would've never thought these groups of weirdos would be my future best friends." I smile and stare at my feet moving across the ground. "They really helped me out back then, I owe them a lot. I did kind of put them through hell back in the day. I probably owe them all an apology for _something _I did."

"Us weirdos accept monetary apology's only." Tina holds up her hand in a 'give me my money' type of way.

"You're going to have to stand in line Girl-Chang." I snap back at her and everyone laughs.

We reach a tougher part of the dirt trail and find myself yet again climbing over giant rocks. Brittany helps me get on top of some of them and I check behind me to make sure everyone else is getting along fine. I mostly check to make sure Puck and Artie are okay though. I'm glad to see Finn helping them with some of the more challenging rocks.

"Where is Devin and Joel?" Sam looks forward and I follow his gaze. I hadn't realized until now that they were no longer in our line of sight.

"Damn, those two are fast." Mercedes laughs.

"They're probably at the first bunker by now," Brittany comments and continues to follow the dirt path when she knows everyone has cleared the rocks.

"Okay what bunkers are you talking about?" I ask her hurriedly as I jog to catch up to her.

She stops and waits for everyone else to catch up too. "At the top of this trail there are two abandon bunkers from World War II. They were basically built to protect the windward coastline." she explains.

"And people just hike up here to what, go inside them?" Rachel questions.

"Look around," Brittany motions to the view. I actually didn't notice until now that we could see this much of the ocean from where we were. We were basically walking along the ridge line at this point, "If you can see this much from just right here, imagine the view from up there." she moves her hand to point at the top of the trail and I can make out what looks to be a small concrete structure. The sun is in my eyes but I can still see two people sitting at the edge on top of it and I soon realize that it's Devin and Joel.

Sugar grabs my shoulders and starts guiding me to begin moving again. I catch the hint and start walking on my own. "Hurry up Santana, I'm tired, it's hot and that up there looks like the perfect place to sit down and relax."

"Mami, if you knew we were going hiking why didn't you bring your water bottle?" I roll my eyes and go into the small bag that I brought along with me. I pull out the small water bottle and hand it her behind me. When she gives it back to me it's empty and I look at her in disbelief which in turn just makes her shrug.

I walk in silence next to Brittany the rest of the way up, only stopping to look behind and check on my friends. I don't want one of them falling over the edge, even though I do imagine it sometimes. Just sometimes though.

"You should really get that fixed," Brittany shakes her head, "The whole thinking out loud thing."

"I've never spoken my thoughts out loud before in my life," I tell her, "Maybe you're getting it wrong and you just know me so well that you can read my mind." I joke with her and she smiles back at me.

"Yeah, maybe." she giggles.

"No I'm pretty sure you're just speaking out loud," Blaine shakes his head, "We just don't say anything because we don't want to get hurt. Most of the time it's in Spanish though." he tells me and everyone nods with a resounding 'Yeah' or 'Sounds about right'.

Brittany frowns and I look at her with questioning eyes. "I thought I was special and only I could read your thoughts."

I smile at her and then turn around to glare at everyone behind me.

"What thoughts?" Sam quickly saves.

"I didn't hear anything. You?" Finn asks Artie and he shakes his head hurriedly.

"Nope. Nothing. Na-da." Mike speaks up.

"That's what I thought," I grin at them and turn my attention back on Brittany who is just looking at me in adoration.

"You _are _mean." she laughs, "How is it that they still want to be your friend?"

"Oh we don't." Quinn holds her hand up and points at me, "This one though couldn't live without us so we just do the nice thing and stick around."

"See?" I turn to Brittany, "See what I have to put up with?" I tell her and everyone laughs.

"Yeah, like you're any easier?" Devin's voice pulls my attention in front of me and I realize that we've reached the first bunker. "How did any of you survive with her in your class?" He looks at everyone behind me, "She doesn't stop talking! All I hear is Brittany this Brittany that."

I throw my empty water bottle at him to shut him up and he effectively dodges it.

"Do you seriously talk about me throughout class?" Brittany beams next to me and I blush.

"Oh my, she's blushing!" Rachel yells from her spot and my cheeks heat even more.

"Why don't you ever talk to me that much during our class?" Brittany questions further.

"Because she knows you like to pay attention," Devin rolls his eyes, "Plus she likes to watch you when you're concentrating really hard. She thinks it's _cute_."

"Devin!" I yell at him and he laughs.

"Aww look at how riled up poor Satan is!" Kurt pinches my cheeks and I swat his hand away.

God, this is so embarrassing.

"Whatever," I turn away and go back to the dirt trail and point to the second structure, "I'm going to the second bunker, follow me if you want to be thrown off." I grab Brittany's hand and pull her with me.

"You don't have to be so embarrassed you know," Brittany chuckles, "They just like to see that you're happy."

"Yeah well I can still kick their asses." I growl and pick up the pace.

"How about we just enjoy the view then?" She reaches out and links her pinky in mine and just like that all the anger and embarrassment dissipates. I turn to the left and take in the sight of Brittany with a backdrop of the ocean and my heart melts.

"How can you be this beautiful?" I stare at her in awe and she blushes.

When we make it to the second bunker there are a few other people that are just leaving to hike back down. It makes me feel a little giddy inside knowing that I'll get to share this view at the spot with Brittany and only Brittany right now.

"Ellie," The man from earlier calls out to his dog and sure enough Ellie comes running up to him, "Come on girlie, let's leave these two to it." he winks at Brittany and I before making his way back down the trail.

Brittany is the first to jump on top of the structure and she helps me up. I feel a sense of peace standing on top of the bunker. The view is amazing and the company is even better. A gust of wind whips through the air and Brittany holds her arms out to her side as her blonde hair moves in ripples behind her.

"On top of the world?" I smirk at her and she ducks her head in embarrassment.

"I'm not the only one." she laughs and points back down to the first bunker. I move over to her spot and squint to see the group of idiots still occupying the small structure. Every one of them are doing the same pose as Brittany minus Devin and Quinn who are just shaking their heads.

"This was a really good idea," I sit down at the edge and Brittany comes to sit next to me.

"I thought really hard about where we could go." she tells me, "I didn't want it to be difficult for Artie so I figured a short hike with a great view would be perfect." she smiles proudly and I look at her in awe.

_I love you._

"What?" Brittany turns to face me and my eyes widen.

_Shit_.

* * *

**AN: I'm so sorry that this is super late again. This chapter had to be split into two parts but luckily for you guys I've already written it. SOOOO I **_**might**_ **be posting it tomorrow. Tell me how badly you want it and review! :D**

**Lanikai Pillboxes:  
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farm5 . staticflickr . com (/) 4131/4845177636_bfaab8d3a0_z . jpg

**Take out spaces and ()  
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	13. The Answer Is Yes Part II

**Waimea Rock Jump:**

youtube . com (/) watch?v=sogCtOe8FFY

**Take out spaces and () **

**Not my video, credit goes to where credit belongs.**

**Santana POV**

* * *

Chapter 13: The Answer Is Yes Part II

_I love you._

"What?" Brittany turns to face me and my eyes widen.

_Shit_.

"What?" I mimic her and she tilts her head in response.

"You said-"

"I didn't say anything." I turn away and close my eyes. What the hell just happened? Shit. That was the first time I even just _thought _that and I had go and say it out loud.

"Oh, I thought I heard you say something." Brittany tries again and I try my hardest to not turn back and look her in the eyes.

"So where are we going to next?" I quickly change the subject. I turn my head back around to face her and I'm greeted with sad eyes. I know she heard it.

"Oh," she looks back at the view, "I figured the beach would be great after this."

I sigh in relief that she allowed the change of subject, but what else was I supposed to say? I shake my head and return back to the conversation at hand.

"You know," I chuckle to myself, "I actually haven't been to the beach all that much in the two years that I've been here." I tell her and she turns to look at me with wide eyes.

"Are you serious?" she gapes and I nod. "How is that even possible?"

"I don't live anywhere near the beach." I explain, "Plus I'm always busy with school and work. I wouldn't even know where to go or how to get there."

"But you have been before, right?" she turns to me completely, "With friends or something?"

"Sugar and I attempted to go once but the only places we knew were Ala Moana…" I pout regrettably, "We tried going after I had classes one day. It really is the only beach we know of. Besides Waikiki of course but there's no way I'm going to drive around looking for parking in that hell hole."

"So you've never driven around the island? You've basically just been exploring like a third of Oahu!" she raises her voice and I can't help but giggle at how worked up she's getting about it.

"Well I don't really make it a point to become friends with people so I never really had the chance to go the beach with friends."

"Oh my God, Santana." She shakes her head at me, "That's insane."

"Yeah, tell me about it. Who doesn't want to be friends with _me_?" I joke and she rolls her eyes playfully.

"Okay that's it," she gets up from the edge and helps me up, "We're leaving. I was just going to take you guys to Lanikai Beach after this since I mean, it's right there." She points to the ocean in front of us, "But now that I know you've never been to that side at all, that's where we're going."

"What side?" I ask her curiously as we begin to walk together down the trail to the first bunker.

"Nope, I'm not telling you. I'm going to take you to the one beach that everyone goes to at least once. I don't care if it's touristy. It's the fact that you've never experienced it yet."

"I'm actually starting to get scared," I tell her. We reach our friends and they all jump down from the structure.

"Lanikai?" Devin smiles at us and Brittany smiles back. They share a silent conversation for a second and Brittany turns to us.

"We're going to Waimea Bay."

* * *

I hop into Brittany's car and start the engine. Devin, Brittany and Joel we're going to show Sugar how to drive to the north shore so they decided to go in one car. I'm to drive Brittany's car and Sam is to drive Devin's car and since Devin's car seats more; girls in one car, boys in the other.

"So who are we following?" Quinn takes the passenger seat and turns to me.

"I think we're following Sam and he's following Sugar." I tell her and check my mirrors. Within minutes I see Sugar's car pull away from the curb and Devin's car soon after follows. I take a deep breath and begin to follow Sam.

"Radio please!" Rachel's voice pierces through the silence and I groan internally. _An hour_. Brittany said it's going to take an hour to get there. Let's hope Rachel decides to take a nap.

* * *

Eric walks through the food court and looks around for Ryan. Finally he sees a little hand moving about in the middle of crowded tables. He smiles in recognition and makes his way over.

"We found seats!" The little girl smiles up at him.

"I see that," Eric laughs, "It was pretty hard finding you guys all the way over here. Lucky for me, you have gigantic hands!" her grabs her hands and waves them about, making her laugh.

"Sorry," Ryan apologizes, "She wanted to be the one to call you over. I was instructed to keep my hands on the table."

"It's okay," he shrugs it off and looks at the little girl beside him, "Guess who just texted me."

"Ariel?" she questions innocently about her favorite Disney princess.

Eric and Ryan laugh and he shakes his head, "No, your mommy." He tells her and her face lights up, "Would you like to speak to her?" he asks and she nods her head shyly.

Eric pulls out his phone and dials the numbers quickly. He hands her the phone and she grabs it before thanking him.

"Hey baby," Brittany's soft voice fills her daughter's head and she smiles.

"How'd you know it was me?"

"Of course it's you," Brittany laughs, "You wouldn't let Eric call me on shopping day. You would scold him for bothering me." she tells her and they share a giggle.

"How's your day?" The little girl bounces in her seat while Eric and Ryan stare lovingly at the little bundle of energy.

"Sorry baby hold on. Turn here." Brittany pulls the phone from her ear slightly, "It's going great actually. Are you giving your uncles a hard time?"

"Mhm!"

"Good girl. Make Uncle Ryan spend all his money on you okay? He doesn't need any more sweaters. It's gonna be summer soon."

"He tricked me and Uncle Eric though." She pouts, "He told us he was going potty but he went to Banana Republic instead." She turns to the man in question and glares at him.

Ryan leans forward to yell into the phone, "I really did have to pee though! And your daughter over here made me hold it until I bought her ice cream!"

"Uncle Ryan!" the small girl scolds, "It's not polite to yell!"

Eric stifles a laugh next to Ryan. Ryan responds by jabbing him in the ribs with his elbow. Through the phone are a few giggles that can be heard coming from inside the car.

"Baby, did you really make him hold it?" Brittany asks, concerned.

"It wasn't _that _long mommy. He's just a big baby."

"He _is _a baby, isn't he?" Brittany grins knowing the Ryan can't hear their conversation. The girl at the end of the line giggles with her mother.

"What are you doing today, mommy?"

"Well I'm actually on my way to the beach," she pauses because she knows that her daughter has been wanting to go to the beach for a while now, "I'm sorry baby, I know you really want to go. Next time okay?"

"Are you with your special friend?"

"What?" Brittany panics slightly before she remembers the conversation she had with her daughter about maybe meeting her 'special friend' soon. "How'd you know I was with her?"

"Don't hide it mommy." Her daughter tells her knowingly.

"Baby, I don't understand what-"

"Love, mommy." the little girl rolls her eyes, "You're in love. Duh."

Eric and Ryan's eyes widen when they finally process what the little girl said. The four bodies in the car suddenly still and Sugar almost swerves into the next lane when she doesn't turn with the road.

"Baby-"

"Uncle Joel says you sleep with your computer. I don't get it but he says I have to wait til I'm in love. He says you talk about her all the time."

"That doesn't mean-"

"And you burned my pancakes yesterday. You were weird and just stared at them with these big doughy eyes for a long time."

"That was because-" Brittany tries to cut in to defend herself.

"-because it looked like a dinosaur." the little one finishes for her, "Uncle Joel says it has to do with your girlfriend."

Brittany snaps her head towards Joel at the mention of the word 'girlfriend' and he looks at her apologetically. She shakes her head at him and focuses back onto the voice of her daughter.

"I was kinda mad at you for not telling me but Aunty Sugar told me you're too scared to admit that you're both in love and scared I'll get hurt too."

Sugar chances a glance at Brittany next to her and is surprised to find her still frozen in place.

"I'm a big girl mommy. I can protect myself too. I don't want you not be happy 'cause of me."

"No baby, I _am _happy. You make me happy, I love you-"

"I know you love me." Her daughter sighs, "But it's not all about me. Uncle Ryan says you worry too much but you shouldn't 'cause there is so many people that love us. He thinks you need to learn how to _deer gate_."

"Delegate," Ryan corrects her with a laugh and ruffles the little girl's hair, "Your mom needs to delegate."

"Yeah, de-le-gate." she tries the word out and Eric almost melts at how cute it is.

Brittany finally breaks from her trance and remembers that she's in the car with three other people. It's quiet but it's crystal clear as to what they're thinking. They all agree with her daughter.

"Really mommy, If you keep doing this you're gonna be a mess when I go school."

"You're never going to school. I'm going to homeschool you." Brittany snaps and Devin punches her arm playfully, "Fine you can go to school." she pouts and Sugar giggles.

"Mommy, when you accept that you love her, we can all spend time together. That way we can still have mommy/daughter time!"

"I'm sorry baby, I don't want you to feel neglected. I try to balance it out as much as possible."

"No it's 'kay. I like it. All my Uncles give me lots of attention and snacks. Just don't make it into a forever thing and tell each other how you feel already!" she scolds her mom and Brittany smiles.

"When did you get so smart?" Brittany tells her daughter and everyone giggles along.

* * *

I'm seriously considering revoking Sugar's and Sam's driver's license. Sugar's swerving so much and that idiot Sam is following her every movement. As in swerving _with_her.

"You really do think out loud." Quinn laughs, "It's weird that no one's ever pointed that out till now."

The mention of my slip ups reminded me of _the _slip up. The one where I told Brittany that I love her. I begin to freak out again and Rachel notices.

"Santana? Are you oka-"

_Hey big spender! Spend a little time with me!_

"Hello?" I answer my phone and put it on speaker so everyone can hear.

"Babe, put your phone on speaker." Brittany's voice fills the car and I instantly blush.

"Heeeey Brittany." Quinn leans over to speak, "Your _babe _already had you on speaker." She teases and pokes my cheek.

"Oh," Brittany giggles in the most adorable way, not helping my blush at all, "Can you call Sam? I want to explain the parking situation to you all."

I quickly search for Sam's number in my contacts and within seconds he answers and puts it on speaker while I link the two calls.

"Okay Britt-Britt, everyone's here." I place my phone on the middle console and concentrate on the road. At this point we're basically driving on a rough paved road along the mountain going downhill. We've passed a few beaches already and I'm beginning to wonder where the hell we're going. Those beaches seemed fine to me, and they didn't look too crowded.

"Alright so if you all look to the left," Brittany imitates a tour guide, "You will see our destination." We come up to a huge bend in the road and the moment we pass it, we can see the beach below us. We all turn our heads to look over at the scene and I honestly can't believe I've lived here two years and I've never come down to this side of the island.

"It's so beautiful..." I recognize Kurt's voice breaking the silence first and I roll my eyes.

"Did you have to open your mouth and ruin it, Porcelain?"

"Santana..." Brittany warns and I shut my mouth. "Okay now that we're all here, I should let you all know that parking is really horrible here. But before you get all fussy there is a house a little more down the road that will let us park there. Thank Eric for calling in a few favors."

"Okay so," Devin starts talking, "Britt, Joel and I are going to hop out of the car down at the beach so we can find a good spot for us on the sand. If you can't find parking in the parking lot then go back onto the main road and go down until you see this dark brown house on the left. You won't miss it. There's a huge driveway. You can just park there."

"So we just follow the road back to the beach if we park there?" Sam asks him.

"No, from that house there's a pathway down to the beach. From there you'll have to walk the whole length of the beach to get to our usual spot though. So it's best to find parking in the lot."

"Well it can't be that bad right? How long is the beach?" Puck asks. Probably in the interest of Artie seeing as he'll most likely be the one carrying him again.

"I'd say about a quarter mile." Devin answers and every one of us girls in our car spoke at once.

"NOPE."

"Oh hell to the no."

"Oh my,"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah we're going to find parking in the lot. Trouty, take this as your one and only warning, you try to take any parking spot before Sugar and I find one, I _will _rip your face off."

"Message received. Loud and clear."

* * *

It's been about five minutes since Brittany, Joel and Devin left Sugar's car and went down to find a spot on the beach. The rest of us are still in our cars trying to find parking. We decided to just park on the side and wait till we see any cars leaving. Sam and the boys are in front of us girls with Sugar behind us.

For some odd reason we never hung up our calls so we're all pretty much just talking story.

"Sam let's just park at the house, there's no way we're going to find parking." Finn whines and I really want to just smash this car into theirs in front of me, but I can't because I'm driving Brittany's car and he's driving Devin's car.

"Shut it Finn. If Sam sees a parking open up he has direct orders to take the spot until either Sugar or I come to claim it." I spit to my phone and Quinn tries to calm me down by rubbing my shoulder.

"Jesus Santana, what's up with you? You were fine during the hike and now you're all snappy. What happened?" Rachel huffs.

"What are you talking about? I'm the same."

"No she's right," Artie chimes in, "Did you and Brittany get into an argument?"

"No that can't be it," Tina leans forward from the back seat and eyes my face, "Brittany still called her 'babe' earlier on the phone and Santana blushed. It must be something else."

"Did you embarrass yourself again?" Mike chuckles and I rev the engine a little for good measure.

"Real mature, Santana." Sugar speaks up and I glance in my rear view mirror to flip her off.

"Okay you know what? Stop. Why the hell are we talking about my love life right now? We should be looking for parking." I yell at them.

I suddenly become very aware of how silent it actually became and I look around my car. The moment I make eye contact with everyone around me they avert their eyes quickly with a faint smile on their lips like they're holding something in.

"What?"

"That's it isn't it?" Quinn smiles at me and I raise an eyebrow.

"What's it?" I question her back and her smile grows deeper.

"You told her you love her." Kurt chimes in and my eyes widen.

"It must be it. That's the only explanation." Blaine continues his boyfriend's thoughts.

"Did you tell her at the hike? When you went to the second bunker? Oh my God, Santana!" Sugar squeals a little too loudly.

"So that's why you were super jumpy when we were going back to the cars." Rachel nods her head in understanding.

"Yeah I agree with Santana," Puck speaks up, "Why are we talking about her love life right now? This isn't a slumber party. I'm hanging up now."

"Puck if you so much as even _move _your hand in the vicinity of that phone, I will break your fingers." Kurt snaps.

"Damn Lady Hummel. Seeing a new side of you are we?" I laugh at his change in character.

"What can I say? No one messes with girl talk." Kurt explains and I choke back a laugh.

"Annnnd he's back." I roll my eyes.

"Shut up Satan. Now come on and tell us. What happened?" His voice sounds louder now and I'm only to assume that he probably grabbed Sam's phone and is now holding to his mouth like he's in dire need for a gossip fix.

"There's nothing to tell. I accidentally blurted it out because I apparently don't know how to think something without saying it. She heard it though. I know she did. When she asked me what I said I denied it and changed the subject. End of story."

"Seriously? That's it?" Tina sits forward on the edge of her seat and I nod.

"Why did you deny it?" Mike asks, "It would have been a really sweet moment for you two."

"I just couldn't. I got scared. I didn't even get the chance to process the information when I felt it. I don't know what happened. I've never-"

"You've never said have you?" Quinn puts her hand on my shoulder and I shake my head.

"Was that a no? Did she shake her head!?" Puck yells and I look up to the car in the front. I can clearly make out the figures of a gang of guys in a car all looking through the back window at me. So much for his bad boy image.

"So do you love her?" Mercedes asks me and I turn around to look at her.

"I- I don't know. I think so?"

"You think so?" Sugar speaks up again and I look at her in the car behind us. "What are you so scared of Santana?"

"What if she doesn't feel the same?" I turn back around and duck my head down as I play with the hem of my shirt. "I know she heard me said and she didn't say anything back. What if I freaked her out?"

"From the looks of it, you didn't freak her out though. If anything, she seems happier." Sugar tells me softly.

"Really? Did she say anything in the car? About me?" I turn around again to look at her and she looks like a deer caught in headlights.

"I- I- um-" Sugar stutters and the hope in my chest increases ten-fold.

"She did didn't she?" I twist around in my seat, "What did she say?"

"Woah, breathe Santana." Artie laughs. "Sugar, baby don't tell her anything."

"What!?" I turn forward again and rev the engine like I mean business this time.

"Okay okay calm down," I see Artie hold up his hands in surrender. "All I'm saying is don't you want it to be special when you both first say it? You don't want to ruin it by listening to what she talked to Sugar about. Whatever it may be, you don't want to ruin the moment when you first say it. Especially if you've never said it before."

"He has a point Santana," Blaine laughs, "You have to figure it out yourself."

"I know. I will too. This feeling is all new territory for me, guys. I'm just too scared right now."

"You'll figure it out San," I look up and see Sugar smiling at me through the mirror, "I know you will."

* * *

The moment my feet hit the sand I immediately try to search Brittany out. I try to think of what she was wearing so that I could spot her but the moment I do I realize that we're at the beach. Which means one thing: Swimsuit. If I could hardly control myself when she's just standing there fully clothed, how the hell am I going to control myself now?

"There!" Sugar jumps up and points to the far left side of the beach and I can see Devin and Joel running in the sand.

We make our way over there but I don't see Brittany.

"Where's Britt?" I ask Devin when he runs over and lays stomach down on his towel.

He lifts his head and smiles at me before turning around and pointing to the ocean. I follow his line of sight but his arm is elevated. I follow it up and find Brittany at the edge of a very large rock. There's group of people clustered on the top and a few people climbing their way up from the sand.

From where she's standing it's about a thirty foot drop into the water. She's wearing a blue two piece that I swear was made just for her. Her hair is wet and fallen around perfect shoulders. Just as I'm about to call out to her she looks over to me and smiles.

"If you aren't smitten by now, Santana," Rachel stands next to me, "then something _must _be wrong with you."

Brittany waves at me and my attempt to wave back turned into an awkward arm twitch because I'm too mesmerized to work properly.

She turns back to the ocean and spreads her arms out in the same fashion that she did back at the hike. She takes a step forward launches herself off the rock and into the air gracefully. Her descend into the water below goes by in slow motion for me as I watch her body in perfect form disappear underwater.

_Do I love her?_

My chest explodes within milliseconds of the thought and I feel as if I'm having a mini panic attack. I've never felt like this before and my head is spinning. I walk to the shoreline with wobbly knees as Brittany emerges from the water and swims to the shore.

"Hey stranger," Brittany gets out of the water and greets me. I soon find myself questioning if something really is wrong with me because usually at this point I would be concentrating on how the water is slowly moving down her skin but instead I seem to be caught in her eyes.

_Those deep blue. The ocean got nothing on those._

I finally move my eyes to the rest of her face and I notice her blushing. The cogs turn in my head and I smile at myself.

"I said that out loud, didn't I?" I laugh and she nods.

"It was very sweet. Thank you." She leans in and kisses me on the cheek as she links her fingers in mine and we walk back to the group.

Everyone laid down their towels and is settling in now. Kurt is directing Blaine on which way to place their beach umbrella while he applies sunscreen to his arms. A couple of the guys are whispering to each other behind the girls who are just sitting on their towels, trying to get comfortable.

Brittany and I smile at each other because we know what's going on. We can see it on their faces. Devin grabs Joel, Puck grabs Quinn, Finn grabs Rachel, Mike grabs Tina and Sam grabs Mercedes. Blaine sees what's going on and grabs Kurt, making him scream out. Sugar catches on and runs to grab Artie and soon I'm being lifted off the ground and we're all heading towards the water, which by the way is way colder than it looks.

I make my way to the surface of the water and search Brittany out. I feel her presence behind me and I turn around quickly and latch my body onto hers, wrapping my legs around her torso and my arms around her neck.

"San," she giggles and instinctively wraps her arms around my waist. I pull her closer and she holds me tighter, "I was trying to scare you again."

I smirk at her and lean in to kiss her softly, "Haven't you learned your lesson the last time?"

"No." She smiles into another kiss, "You need to teach it to me again." She whispers seductively and I become very aware of our position and how hot our skin is getting even though the water is freezing. "But you're going to have to catch me first," she grins and her hands move from my back to my ribs making my eyes widen.

"Don't." I warn her and her grin deepens, "Brittany! I'm warning you!" I try again but it's too late. I let out a cry/scream as her finger dance around my skin there and she tickles me.

I release my grip on her and my legs fall to the sand again. As soon as she's released she dips under the water and swims away. I follow after her and we spend the next few minutes playing cat and mouse.

* * *

I have to admit, the first time you jump off of the rock that Brittany jumped off earlier is pretty damn scary. It looks doable from the sand because you see everyone else doing it but the moment you're on that edge, it's a totally different story.

That is unless you're standing beside Brittany S. Pierce.

"Together?" I ask her and she smile down at me and links our fingers again.

"Together."

In that moment it felt like I could do anything as long as she's beside me.

* * *

"Blaine honey," Kurt calls from his spot under his umbrella and we all look from where we're standing on the rock. "Don't hurt yourself!" he finishes and I laugh when Blaine blushes in embarrassment.

"_Blaine honey_," I tease, "_Don't hurt yourself."_

"Santana!" Brittany calls from the sand with her hands on her hips and I turn around so quickly I almost lose my balance and fall off. How the hell did she hear that? I pout at her and she shakes her head at me.

"Tight leash you got there, Lopez." Puck laughs and I glance to make sure Brittany isn't looking before I push him off the rock completely, making him fall awkwardly into the water.

Everyone takes a step or two away from me and I nod proudly.

* * *

By the time we arrive back to the house we're all pretty beat. It's been a long day and the beach really did a number on all of us. We collapse onto the floor of the living room as everyone takes turns for the shower.

There was a slightly awkward moment when it was Brittany's turn to shower and Devin started teasing me to go shower with her. It got really quiet. It was awkward. And embarrassing. Luckily, I was laying face first on the couch and just pretended to be sleeping when he suggested it.

Brittany quickly caught on and saved it with, "No it's okay, maybe next time. When she's not so tired. She'll need her energy."

Which made me want to jump on her of course. But I know better now, she's just teasing me because she knows how easily I react to it. I kinda love/hate it.

As soon as I made sure everyone was all clean and nobody could dirty my armchair, we settled in the living room and threw out ideas on what to do next. It was pretty early in the evening still so we figured we could do something fun still.

"How about a barbeque?" Puck holds his thumbs up in high hopes and a few people nod their heads in agreement.

"But that's such a boring guy thing. Beer and meat." Rachel frowns and Kurt nods along with her.

"What if we hooked up the karaoke machine?" I suggest, "We could just have a chill barbeque party and have the karaoke on the side if anyone wants to sing," I hold my hand up to stop Rachel, "Yes Rachel, you can sing. I won't rip your throat out. Just try to keep it the irritating to a minimum. There's only so much I can take."

"Deal."

"It sounds perfect." Brittany smiles next to me and I plant a chaste kiss on her cheek.

"Alrighty then, Puck and I got the drinks." Finn stands and Puck follows him out the door.

"I guess that leave me and Blaine for food? What do you guys feel like eating?" Sam stands and stretches his arms out. Everyone responds with 'Whatever' or the usual barbeque foods.

"We'll go with you guys." Devin and Joel walk towards the front door with them.

"I'll get the grill ready," Mike stands and pulls Tina and Artie with him, "Charcoal?" he turns around before reaching the back door and I direct him to where we keep our barbeque items.

"So I guess that leaves us to set up the karaoke equipment." Sugar catches on to what everyone is doing and pulls Mercedes, Quinn, Rachel and Kurt out of the room and into the garage to fetch the machine.

"Do they think we're idiots?" I ask Brittany as my eyes roam the now empty living room.

"No," she turns me so that I'm facing her and rests her hands on my hips, "I think they just know we wanted alone time together."

"You wanted alone time with me?" I smile shyly at her.

"I've wanted it all day. But I wouldn't feel right about stealing you from your friends."

"Well at least we had alone time at the hike. It was beautiful and you were so-" the words are caught in my throat as I remember what happened and I choke, again, "Fun. Y-you were fun..."

She ducks her head and giggles adorably and I move my head with hers to keep the eye contact.

"I'm sorry," I tell her when she meets my eyes again and I sigh, "I don't know how to words. I find myself stumbling for sentences when I'm with you. You get me so flustered. You must think I'm such a spaz sometimes."

"Yeah, kinda." She teases and I pout. She quickly leans in and turns it into a smile with a kiss. "But you're _my _spaz. My cute, dinosaur-loving, spaz."

I smile up at her and bring my arms around her back to hold her tighter. I burrow my head into her neck and breathe her in. She's fucking intoxicating. I can't seem to get enough of her.

We start swaying back and forth slowly and I close my eyes to rest.

The sound of very loud feedback echos throughout the room and Brittany and I jump in our place. I turn around to see a wide eyed Rachel standing by the television next to Mercedes, Sugar and Quinn. They're hooking up the karaoke equipment and Rachel of course decided to try and plug her microphone in.

"Sorry. We tried to be quiet but-" She tries to apologize but I hold my finger up to silence her.

"What the hell is that?" I point to the microphone in her hand.

"It's a microphone."

"No shit," I roll my eyes and grab it from her hands, "Who the hell brings their own microphone on a spring break trip?"

"Prepared people, Santana." She scoffs and snatches it back, "Seriously, you never know when you'll have the opportunity to sing. I came fully prepared." She holds it up and inspects it to make sure none of her gold stars fell off.

"Rachel, that thing is blinding." Mercedes squints when it hits the light in an awkward way making the glare hit her eyes.

"Sorry. Maybe I went a little overboard with the glitter."

"You think?" I laugh.

* * *

After half an hour of convincing Rachel not to sing before dinner, everyone came back and the grill got fired up in no time. Most of the guys are outside having a beer and keeping each other company while Puck grills, and everyone else is inside trying to clear the area for everyone to eat and sing.

"You guys have a lot of songs on here!" Joel excitedly shouts from by the television.

Devin and I are in the kitchen making sure we have enough cold drinks and talking story.

"So what's going on with you two? You're acting together but I can't really tell." I ask him as I slide some of the beer to the side of the refrigerator.

"We're together." He smiles at me and I almost scream.

"I fucking knew it. Congrats, I'm happy for you too." I give him a hug and he returns it with half the enthusiasm. When I pull away I study his face to make sure he's okay.

"What's wrong?" I stop with what we're doing and close the refrigerator door. He sighs and stands against the door while I hop myself onto the counter.

"It's Eric." He looks down, "This morning when we woke up we started talking and it got weird."

"Please don't tell me you guys had sex in my living room with all my friends asleep around you."

"What the fuck Santana? NO. Credit me with at least _some_class." He pushes my shoulder and I chuckle. There's a quiet pause before he speaks again, "He told me he has feelings for me."

I turn to look at him and he nods. "Seriously?" I ask just to make sure and he nods again.

"What do I do?" He asks me softly.

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't know. He's my best friend. I thought he had feelings for Ryan this whole time but he said it was just a crush." He turns around and grabs us both a beer from the refrigerator.

"Did he say when it started?" I grab the bottle from him after he opens it and take a long sip.

"He just said recently."

"Do you feel the same?" I ask him softly.

"I'm with Joel now." He answers quickly.

"That wasn't a 'No' though." I slide off the counter and tap my glass with his, "You'll figure it out. Only you know what to do."

* * *

Dinner was a success. Everyone is either extremely full or extremely drunk. On the drunk side: Sugar, Rachel, Tina, Mercedes, Artie, Devin, Kurt and of course me. But I'm not too drunk. At least I don't think so. Which leaves the food whores as being: Quinn, Sam, Mike, Finn, Joel, Blaine, Puck and last but not least, the very sexy Brittany.

Speaking of, I haven't seen Brittany in while. I thought she was going to the bathroom but she never came back. Now that I'm looking around, I can't seem to find Devin, Joel or even Sugar. I smile at Quinn and Artie singing 'I'm Still Standing' and stand to walk to the kitchen.

"What did she say?" I hear Devin's voice come from the other side of the door leading into the kitchen and I quickly stop myself from opening the door.

"I don't even know if I heard it correctly." Brittany answers him but her voice sounds almost sad.

"You did." I hear Sugar next and my heart rate picks up. Are they talking about what I think they're talking about?

"How do you know? You weren't there." Joel speaks up.

"She told us." Sugar explains, "When you guys went down to the beach and we were in our cars still. She told us that she said it." Well so much for listening to your boyfriends advice, Sugar. You weren't supposed to say anything.

"Does she know?" Devin asks, "About what Mama does?"

That perks my ears up quickly.

"Not yet. I want to tell her though. I'm just not sure." Brittany speaks softly again and if I didn't feel it before, feel like I'm being left out of the loop now. Does Sugar know Mama?

"What's stopping you?"

"I don't know what's going to happen. What if she rejects me?" _Reject her? _Why the hell would I reject her?

"She won't. She'll understand-" Devin tries but Brittany cuts him off.

"What if she doesn't? I don't know how she feels about me. She may have said it already but she didn't even admit to it. If she can't admit it to herself then she's not ready to give me her love. It's that simple."

"Brittany, she loves you. She really does. I've never seen her like this." Sugar pleads with her but it seems like Brittany's not having any of it.

"I need to know Sugar. I need to know for sure if I'm going to make that big of a step."

"Do _you _love her?" Joel asks her and as I wait for her answer I'm met with silence. Did she nod? Shake her head? God, I wish I could see through this damn door.

"Did she really say 'I love you' to me?" Brittany asks Sugar and there's another silent pause, "Does she really feel that way about me?"

I walk away from the kitchen door and go straight to my room. I stand still in the middle of my room until the computer placed strategically on my pillow catches my eye. Soon everything in my room is reminding me of the blonde in the kitchen. My mind wanders and it somehow keeps coming back to the same question with the same answer.

_Do I love her?_

Yes_._

* * *

**AN: I should warn you all that school has started and also my work hours are back to normal, meaning I have even less time to write. I'll try to get as much done as I can and update weekly but I'm not making any promises. Updates will most likely be sporadic... No need to worry though, this story is pretty high on my priority list so I will definitely not abandon it.**

**Also, this is the last chapter featuring the rest of the Glee Club Members. I'll probably bring the gang back together later for another occasion. I don't want to bring them ALL back though. Let me know who you want to see again and who you don't because**** for right now, writing 18 characters in a chapter with 16 characters at most in a single scene is just not fun. It's hard as hell and I'm tired.**

**P.S. whatever happened to Rachel's cat? I have no idea. I kept forgetting about that damn thing.**


	14. Songbird

**Brittany POV**

* * *

Chapter 14: Songbird

_[S:] I'm going to do it. I don't know the details of when I'll do it but I promise you, Britt's gonna love it. _

I should really make sure things are mine before touching it. A minute ago, Devin's phone vibrated next to me and seeing as we have identical phone's I picked it up. His text messages lit up like a christmas tree immediately. I can't help but curiously scroll through the earlier texts to see what they're talking about.

_[S:] I know I may have a been a bit drunk at the house party a couple weeks back but I know what I heard. _

_[D:] So then prove it... _

"Sorry," Devin hands me my iced tea and sit down next to me, "There's some new kid at the counter. He can't make tea for shit. I miss Joel."

I thank him and grimace when I take my first sip, "Oh god," I push it to the other side of the table and Devin does the same.

"Is that my phone?" Devin points to his phone in my hands and I quickly exit out of his messages before handing it back to him.

"Yeah, sorry. I thought it was mine for a second," I feign disinterest. "When does Joel get back? I don't know how long I'll be able to survive with this new kid."

"Next week Wednesday," he smiles to himself, "I can't wait. We haven't spent a lot of time alone yet. We've just been so busy with my work and his school."

"Hey, what are we talking about?" Ryan and Eric walk up to our booth and sit across from us. They both take a sip from our cups of tea and pull the same face as us.

"Joel." I smile up at them in greeting, "Devin was telling me how they're planning to spend more time with each other when he gets back."

Ryan chokes on air and I see Eric look away from the table awkwardly. I glance around the table quietly and Devin shifts uncomfortably next to me.

"Anyways..." I continue to make conversation, "What time is Sugar getting here?" I ask Ryan because he seems to be acting the most normal right now.

"Right now," Sugar jumps up to our booth and slides in next to Eric. "What's up? Oh! Can I get one of those?" She eyes the cup of tea on the table and Ryan pushes both of them towards her.

"Where's the little one?" Ryan asks Sugar and she points to the counter by the kitchen.

"She's coloring." She explains and takes her first sip of the tea, "Eww."

"Why is she coloring all the way over there?" Eric turns to see the little girl furiously coloring in her book. "And why does she look so mad?"

"She told me that it's super top secret and got all mad at me when I tried to look. She made me come to the table by myself." She grabs a large handful of sugar packets and begins empties them into the cup of tea as we all watch in amazement. That seriously can not be healthy for a person.

"Okay let's not get off topic." Eric snaps from his daze and everyone does the same.

"Right, so we called this family meeting because-" Devin starts talking but gets distracted when he sees Sugar hold her hand over her chest, "Why are you doing that? Stop it."

"You said 'family meeting'. As in I'm apart of the family..." Sugar's eyes lit up and tears begin to form.

"No." Devin scolds her, "Stop it. Stop it right now. There will be no crying." He begins to shift uncomfortably and the rest of us giggle at the exchange.

"Anyways," Eric sits up and gets our attention, "We called the family meeting because you all apparently can't keep your mouths shut."

I nod sternly but I'm pretty sure it doesn't come off that way judging by the looks Sugar and Ryan are trying to hold back.

"We have to be very careful of what we say in Britt's house. Little ears are listening and if we've learned anything from a couple weeks ago, she hears everything." Eric looks directly to Ryan.

Ryan sighs, "In my defense, I was talking on the phone with Joel. It's not completely my fault if she just happened to be playing her toys in the same room. I didn't think she'd understand half the things we were talking about. We were just talking and I got carried away. Hasn't that ever happened to you? Like when-"

"It's okay." I stop him from beginning a never ending rant and smile at him, "I'm not mad at anyone. I was caught off guard for sure but we worked it out right? I just wanted to make sure that we're all on the same page. No more talking about my love life in front of my daughter."

"Understood." Ryan nods.

"Sugar, I just got off work so you don't have to babysit anymore for today." I tell her as I begin to gather my things.

Just as Sugar is about to open her mouth to respond he phone vibrates on the table and Devin's phone does the same a second later. They both look at their message before looking at each other knowingly.

"I think my services might still be needed." Sugar smiles at me but before I could question her my phone rings.

"H-hello?" I answer Santana's call hesitantly.

"You're not busy tonight are you?" Santana asks me hurriedly and I shift my eyes to Devin and Sugar.

"Tonight?" I ask her as Devin and Sugar both nod at me, "Yeah I'm free. Did you want to go out?"

"Something like that," Santana chuckles nervously, "I'll text you the address. Meet me there at 8:30pm."

_Click_

I pull my phone away from my ear and look at the black screen, "I have to meet her somewhere at 8:30."

"Is that it?" Ryan jumps in his seat and I nod.

"That's all she said. And then she hung up." I continue to stare at my phone.

"Smooth, Santana..." Devin mutters and Sugar giggles.

* * *

I look down to my phone to follow Santana's instructions she texted me earlier and smile when my eyes catch the apology text above it for hanging up so abruptly.

I turn the corner and look around at the buildings in Waikiki. I took a taxi here because I don't like to drive around in Waikiki. Too many one way streets tend to confuse me very easily. There was some type of construction going on though so I got out early and decided to walk the rest of the way.

"Brittany!" I turn around to my name being called and focus in on the voice across the street.

"Greg?" I wave at the familiar bouncer that I usually only see at the club and cross the street quickly, "What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here?" he questions and grabs my hand to pull me in, "The real question is why are you late?"

We go down a short corridor and pass through double doors. The first thing that catches my eyes is the small bar off to the side. What is this place? The lights are low and there's only a few people occupying the tables and booths. There's a small stage at the front of the room and that's when I notice the sign next to me.

_Welcome to Open Mic Night._

"What am I doing here?" I turn to Greg and he smiles as he leads me to the bar and sits me down.

"The first time I met Santana was in this room. I had just finished singing and I went to the bar to get a beer. Santana approached me and told me I was good. I found out she likes to sing too so I tried to convince her to sing next but she refused. She had just moved here from Ohio and week after week I'd see her come back for open mic night. But she never sang."

"Why?" I ask him and he shrugs.

"She never said. We started talking more and became friends. I only saw her once a week but every week I'd try and convince her to sing."

"So how long did it take her to finally sing? She was probably just nervous. Or needed a good reason." I try to explain. The lights dim even further and I look up to the stage. Santana walks up the microphone and takes a deep breath.

"Well it looks like she found her reason," Greg whispers, "Because this is the first time she's ever been up there."

"Is this thing on?" Santana taps the microphone and the sound of feedback pierces through the room. Her face scrunches as she cringes, "Sorry."

I giggle softly at her and notice how nervous she looks. Her fingers are fidgeting with the bottom of her button down shirt and her leg is anxiously bouncing on the ball of her foot. I don't know why though, she sings beautifully. We sing in the car all the time. She shouldn't be nervous.

"This is for my girlfriend, Brittany." Santana takes another deep breath and looks around the room. Everyone's attention is on her. She turns to the guy at the piano off to the side and nods at him. He begins to play a soft melody into the silence and I recognize the song immediately. I close my eyes with a smile to take it all in.

_For you, there'll be no crying_

_For you, the sun will be shining_

_And I feel that when I'm with you_

_It's alright, I know It's right_

I open my eyes and take in the view of Santana singing on stage. I glance around the room and notice more people who look to be regulars have arrived. All of them giving their undivided attention to Santana. They look proud and happy. Like they've known along how incredibly talented their friend is.

I focus back onto Santana and smile proudly along with everyone else. She opening herself up. Not only to me but to everyone here. Tears form in my eyes as she sings and it becomes difficult to continue to watch her as my vision becomes flooded.

I think back to the first time we meet back in Chicago. I froze the moment she opened that door and I know she did too. I never saw her after that until the day she called after me that morning on the bus. It was crazy how I seemed to have found her again but as the bus drove away from her I felt like I blew the only chance I was given. But fate was a funny way of working. My heart jumped when she burst through the door of my class that morning.

_And the songbirds are singing _

_Like they know the score _

_And I love you, I love you, I love you _

_Like never before_

It was fate that the seat she chose was right in front of mine. It has to be. The way she slowly let down her walls for me. The way only she has that special hold that on me. The way I instantly form a smile from just thinking about her or hearing her being mentioned around me. The way she makes me smile into every kiss. This is how it's supposed to feel. It has to be fate that we somehow found each other again.

I've never seen her like this. It's amazing. It's so... vulnerable. Open. Exposed.

_Like never before... _

"Brittany," Santana opens her eyes and I notice the tears, "I love you."

The crowd in the bar erupt before I even have a chance to respond and Santana is ducking her head nervously up on stage. The crowd rush to her when she steps down and I stay seated at the bar as I watch her interact with everyone around her.

It's crazy how she's never mentioned this place before now. I don't even think Sugar knows about this place. It's like her getaway. And she's sharing it with me.

Santana looks at me through the crowd and I smile affectionately at her. She excuses herself from the crowd as she slowly moves toward me and I'm pretty sure nervous Santana is my new favorite thing to watch. It's adorable.

"Hey," She stops in front of me with her hands in her pant's pockets.

"Hey," I parrot with a smile.

"Hey," Greg leans in from the seat next to me and neither I nor Santana acknowledge him, "_Thanks Greg for the help and making sure Britt didn't get lost finding this impossible to find hole in the wall bar_," he mimics a woman's voice, "Riiiiiight, I'm gonna go then. Got work at 9:30."

"Santana," I breathe out as I stand up, "Your voice, it's amazing. I've never heard you sing like that before."

"Thank you." She blushes and I step closer to her.

"Do you really mean it?" I take ahold of her hands and she looks up at me.

"I do." She nods, "I love you, Brittany." she closes her eyes and ducks her head, "And I'm so scared. I'm so scared of what that means for me. What that means for us." She looks up at me again and I see new tears, "I'm so scared, Britt. I just want to know everything about you and I've been so afraid of what will happen that I completely missed the fact that I'm so far gone, that I've fallen. Hard. So now, I'm willing. I'm willing to let everything go and just feel. I love you, and I don't care what happens from here on out. I'm yours."

I wipe her cheeks as the tears stream down her face and keep my hold on her, "I'll tell you." I whisper as I run my thumbs across her jaw line, "I'll tell you everything. Just give me till the end of this week to set it up. I want it to be perfect."

"I don't want you to feel like I'm making you do this though-"

"You're not," I shake my head and kiss her cheek, "I want to do this. It feels right."

"Thank you," She steps forward and wraps her arms around my waist. I hold her close and take in everything that just happened. I'm actually going to do it. I'm going to tell her and everything will finally feel right. There'll be no more avoiding, no more lying, no more secrets.

"Santana?" I whisper, my lips grazing her temple as I remember the most important part.

"Hm?"

"I love you too."

* * *

_I'm in love._

I'm actually in love. It's crazy. I _feel_ crazy.

"You okay?" Santana squeezes my hand in hers, "You seem distracted."

I turn to look at her and I know I've never felt better, "Just thinking." I lean over and rest my head on her shoulder as she shuffles closer to accommodate me, "About how happy I am, and how how beautiful this whole night is."

I feel her nod as we maintain the comfortable silence between us. Sitting at a park bench overlooking a dark, calm ocean is officially one of my new favorite things to do with Santana. A single park lamp placed not too far but yet not too close is the only thing illuminating the night.

"Why did it take me so long to say it?" Santana mutters under her breath and I smile, recognizing it to be her thinking out loud again, "I love you so much..."

I feel the heat rush to my cheeks at the confession as I think back to when she first said those three words. When she wasn't over thinking it and it was just her mind talking to her freely. It was pure and untainted, without doubt or trepidation. It was the truth.

* * *

"Santana," I mumble her name as it rolls from my mouth into hers and she deepens the kiss. I shift my body so that I'm no longer sitting straight and am now turned completely towards her.

I feel her tongue graze my bottom lip and I open my mouth to allow her access. The kiss is slow and deep and behind it is this new fire that neither of us have ever experienced.

My mind doesn't even wander to think about how awkward this must be for the taxi driver right now because it's just _that_ intoxicating to kiss her. To kiss Santana, my girlfriend, my lover.

The moment the car stops we don't waste any time. It happens like a perfectly choreographed dance as Santana quickly throws her cash at the driver with a generous tip and quick 'Sorry and thanks' while I grab our belongings making sure we leave nothing behind. We jump out of the car within seconds and practically rush her front door.

"Britt-" Santana's hand pauses for a split second on the door knob, "Baby, I can't concentrate on opening the door if you keep doing that."

I press my lips softly to her pulse point and run my tongue lightly over the spot I was giving a little too much attention to earlier, "Sorry, I just can't help it I think" I whisper into her ear.

"That too," she turns around and I take the opportunity to press her body up against the door, "Stop teasing me," her lips take mine in and I fumble with the door knob that is still locked.

"Well, I wouldn't be teasing if you would just open the door," I lean away from her smirk, "Once we're behind closed doors, the teasing stops."

And with that, Santana practically kicks her door down and pulls me in. Our lips reattach as she leads us blindly through the hallway and into her living room. She guides my body expertly through the dark room until the back of my knees hit the couch.

"Sit down." She kisses my neck and I do as I'm told.

She straddles my hips and I lean back into the couch as she gently begins to unbutton her shirt. I watch as her skin slowly becomes visible and the knot in my low stomach tightens. I try shifting under her to relive some of the pressure and she smirks down at me, keeping her legs in place.

"Santana..." I roll my head back in protest and she leans down to connect her lips to my exposed neck.

"Patience," I feel the smirk still present on her lips, "You're gonna regret teasing me so much." She whispers into my ear and it takes everything in me not to whimper out loud.

She leans back and I pick my head up off the back of the couch to watch her again. Her signature smirk still playing on her lips and my eyes follow her hands as they move down her taut stomach to the button of her jeans.

She pops it open with ease and slides off my legs to stand in front of me. She keeps her eyes on mine as she makes her way out of her jeans and I become very aware of how much clothes is still on me. I try to shift to the edge of the couch to take my top off but Santana places a flat hand on my chest to keeps me from doing so.

"Not yet." She commands and gently pushes me back into the previous position. She plays with her open shirt for a bit before dropping her arms to the side and letting it fall behind her, pooling at the bottom of her feet.

She steps out of her jeans and my eyes scan over her body and the way her lacy black underwear leave very little to imagination. Before I get the chance to shift again to relive more pressure, she's already on top of me.

"Do you know how many times you've got me all hot and bothered," she leans in and her lips ghost my ear, "and then just walked away?" she moves down and gently kisses my neck, "I think you like teasing me. I wonder," She pauses as her tongue smooths over her kisses and I shudder when I feel her hands at the hem of my shirt, "how long will you be able to last," she slowly pulls it off of my body but just before my hands are free she twists the fabric around and ties it, keeping my hands together behind my back and bound, "If the tables were turned."

"Fuck..." This time I don't stop the whimper from escaping my throat and she grins triumphantly down at me.

"Be right back," She jumps off me quickly and I sit up abruptly.

"Seriously?" I pout as she ignores me and fumbles in the side table drawer next to me. She pulls out a candle and places it on the table. She strikes a match and lets it linger close to the wick. The flame catches and the low light of the flame illuminates some of the darkness surrounding us.

"Don't move." She instructs me, "But just incase you get curious," her hands disappear back into the drawer and she pulls out a piece of cloth. She looks at me hesitantly and it takes me a few seconds to understand her silent question.

"I trust you," I nod and she smiles and presses a sweet kiss to my lips.

"I love you," she whispers softly and disappears behind the couch. My sight suddenly becomes blocked by darkness and my heart rate picks up, "Is that okay?" she runs her hands over my head and I nod again.

The room goes silent. Her hands leave my body and goose bumps begin to rise on my exposed skin. It feels like an eternity has passed when I feel her hands on me again but this time her hands make her way across my ribs and around to my back. I can't help but feel that this entire experience is incredibly arousing.

All my senses are heightened with anticipation from waiting for her next move and is consuming all of my muscles and thoughts. I tense at every touch and the shock moves in waves across my skin.

Her hands explore my body more and I feel her return to a straddled position on top of my lap, grinding down slowly. I try to move my arms to grab a hold of her but I become reminded of my bound state as the fabric rubs against my wrists.

Even without sight, I know she's smirking.

She leans forward and I can feel her loose hairs fall over my chest softly. Her arms wrap around my torso and I arch my back in understanding. She unclasps my bra and pulls it over my head sliding it down my arm to where my hands are restrained.

It becomes quiet and I squeeze my eyes shut to concentrate on listening. Is she just staring? That's when I notice the very subtle cold rush of air hitting my breasts. The feeling immediately replaced with the feeling of her lips and I buck my hips up in return. Her lips wrap around my nipple and her tongue darts out and flicks it teasingly.

"San," I bite my bottom lip and she pulls back slightly to run a flat tongue over my raised nipple.

"Do you want me yet?" her voice is thick and dripping of sex. I nod shyly, embarrassed at how badly I really want her. How I've teased her so much lately and not once delivered. Honestly though, I'm kinda glad I did. The journey makes the destination so much sweeter.

My body goes into mini waves of shock when I start to feel tiny drops of something landing around my breasts and I scan my brain to figure out what it is.

_The candles._

"Santana-" I gasp when another drop hits me, "Is that-"

Her hand reaches up suddenly and rips the blindfold off my head, my vision coming together again in dots as I try to focus on the object in her hand.

"It's just ice, babe." she smirks and lowers her arm. Her cold fingers holding the ice as she draws patterns across my breast. Her eyes locked on my face, watching me as she explores my body. I watch her through hooded eyes as she pops the single ice cube between her teeth and leans into my breasts. Her mouth staying open just enough for the ice to poke out as she works her way around my body.

"Oh my god..." I breathe out when she moves her lips to my neck and grinds her body into me again.

"You're lasting longer than I thought," I feel that damn smirk again and I drive my hips up, earning a suppressed moan from Santana lips. The ice, now small, falling from her mouth onto my neck and disappearing down my spine.

"I'm not the only one," I smirk back and she growls into my neck for a second before she recovers, shifting quickly as her hands move down my stomach. I gasp beneath her when she presses her hand over my clothed center, and I push myself down for more but she pulls back.

I grunt in disapproval and I know there's no arguing anymore. She in control. I lost that fight the moment we got into her house.

She sits up as she rest her weight on her knees and runs a single finger from my chest to my jeans, "Lift," she commands and I buck my hips up. She smirks and helps my out of my jeans without even getting off me.

The air hits my legs and it's then that I realize how wet I actually am.

Her fingers wander back down and slip into my underwear, "Oh my god Britt," Santana breaks character, leaning down and breathing into my neck, "You're so fucking wet." Her fingers roam my folds and I let out a few straggled moans.

She barely even moves her fingers though. And I hate it. And love it. I don't think anyone has ever made me want it this bad. Her fingers move slowly and a few times move slightly up to the bundle of nerves that desperately need her. She doesn't stay long though, just enough to keep me writhing beneath her, wanting more.

"Santana," I groan into her neck and lower my voice, pleading, "Stop teasing and just fuck me already."

And that seems to do it.

"All you had to do was ask." She pushes her body up and presses her free hand into the backing of the sofa as her fingers dip lower and enter me at an agonizingly slow pace. I try to move my hands to her face but I forgot that my arms are bound behind me. I need her closer. I need-

"K-kiss me," I whimper through hooded eyes and lift my head to hers. She complies and presses sweet kisses to my lips and cheek. She moves to my neck and my breathing becomes uneven as she moves her fingers in and out picking up speed.

I loll my head back as she moves from my neck to my breasts and our grinding becomes heated. Her moans get lost in mine and I can feel her pressing herself against her own hand for pleasure. The pressure in my stomach builds as I feel my walls becoming tight around her fingers and I know I won't be able last much longer. She must know it too because her thumb moves up and flicks at my clit, making me let out the loudest moan yet as I break and come crashing down. Our hips moving together in delicious rhythm as she brings me down slowly, letting my orgasm last longer.

"So hot," she moves back up and presses a sloppy kiss to my lips and I return it the same. "Sorry," she mumbles as her hands move around my waist and she fumbles with my shirt for a few seconds before my hands are finally free. "Was it too much?"

I bring them forward and my attempt to caress her cheek dies as my post orgasm haze overpowers me. I drop my arms beside me and shake my head, "Of course not, It was amazing." I assure her. I manage to move my head to the side and kiss her temple for good measure.

She sits up again and runs her hands over my arms giving extra attention to my wrists and then moving back up to my stomach. I tense under her touch again and she giggle above me. "You know," she walks her fingers on my skin and I pick my head up to look at her, "I always thought you looked extremely cute all the time," she whispers and we both blush, "But I think post sex Brittany is my favorite."

"Well you're next," I drop my head back again and take a slow deep breath, "You just have to let me recover first." I admit and she giggles as she settles back on top of me.

"I'm fine with that." She kisses my collarbone, "Did I make you regret teasing me?" She laughs.

"No," I giggle and shake my head, "If anything, I'm gonna tease you even more after this."

* * *

After slowly migrating to the bedroom and returning the favor, a few more times than necessary, we both just lay there. Comfortably holding onto one another and drifting off into sleep. Santana is curled up beside me, her arm and leg thrown over my body in the most adorable way. Her breath evened out a while ago so I know she's deep into sleep now.

I can subtly hear the faint noise of my phone ringing in the living room and I internally groan. I forgot to call Sugar. I knew I was forgetting something.

I carefully remove myself from Santana's bed and tip toe my way into the dark living room. The only light coming from the flashing screen of my phone. My feet find her button down shirt still pooled at the ground and I smile like idiotic teenager as I throw it on and shimmy my way back into my underwear.

My flashing phone stops and my eyes try to readjust to the darkness. I blindly search for where it was when it starts flashing again and I chuckle to myself when I realize it's behind me.

"Hello?" My voice is thick and groggy.

"Brittany?" Sugar sighs, "I'm sorry I'm calling so much. I know I said it's okay if you stayed the night there but she was asking for you a lot. I managed to put her to sleep but I don't know what I'm gonna do if she wakes up."

"No it's okay. Is she okay? She didn't cry did she?" I sit at the edge of the couch and rub my eyes to wake up.

"No, she was a little did but Devin and Eric came at just the right time and did this whole choreographed dancing-singing routine thing to 'Itsy Bitsy Spider'. Honestly it was hilarious, I actually wish I got that on camera..."

"Focus Mama," I chuckle, "It is pretty funny though. And it's super cute."

"It really is," she laughs.

"Alright, I'll get ready now. I should be home in fifteen."

"Sorry if I ruined your night." She apologizes.

"Don't worry about it. It's impossible to ruin it at this point." I smile shyly, "See ya."

I hang up and use my phone as a flashlight to guide my way around her house, picking up my scattered clothing and belongings. I decide to keep Santana's shirt and just put my bra on under it. I slide back into my jeans and tip toe back into Santana's room. I giggle quietly when I see that she's still asleep in the same naked position I left her in.

"Sorry I couldn't stay," I lean down and kiss her on the forehead, "I love you _so_ much. Talk to you tomorrow."

"Love you too." Santana mumbles and tilts her head up. I smile lovingly down at her and lean back in to kiss her lips softly.

* * *

I walk into my house and breathe into my hands to warm them. I walk straight to the living room and find Sugar passed out like usual on my couch with the television still on.

"Hey," I nudge her softly and she jolts up, "Sorry," I laugh and move her legs so that I can sit next to her.

"How was your night?" She rubs her eyes and I smile to myself as I remember everything that happened. "Oh wow. Someone looks happy." She grins at me and I roll my eyes.

"Is it that obvious?" I turn to her and she pokes my cheeks.

"You tell me." she pokes it again, "Are you even capable of pouting right now?"

"Shut up," I try my best to show her my signature pout but the butterflies in my stomach from thinking about Santana become too much and is quickly replaced with a childlike smile.

"I guess not," She laughs louder and I try again but still fail.

We sit there in silence and she leans her body into mine, resting her head on my shoulder.

"I've decided to finally tell her." I whisper and Sugar looks up at me, "By the end of the week. I'm going to introduce them properly." I nod my head in assurance.

"Finally," Sugar rests her head back down, "I don't know how much longer I can do this to her."

"I'm sorry," I rest my head on hers, "It wasn't supposed to be like this." My mind wanders to the many different scenarios of how it could all play out and I try not to panic.

"Are you scared?" Sugar senses the tension and I nod, "Don't be. It's gonna be fine."

"I hope so." I whisper back and push my feelings away.

_I really hope so._


	15. One More Day

**Santana POV**

Chapter 15: One More Day

* * *

"Look," Rachel holds her finger up to silence me, "I'm not saying to go all out and buy the most expensive outfit out there, I'm just saying maybe you should go buy a _new _outfit for the occasion."

"She doesn't know the dress code Rach," Quinn rolls her eyes at her roommate, "What if she shows up over dressed?"

"Brittany didn't say anything about where you're going?" Rachel turns back to the computer and looks at me.

"No," I shake my head, "She just said that it's really important to her."

"And it's tomorrow?"

I nod, "Yep, one more day"

"One day more!" Rachel sings and I roll my eyes at her and her uncontrollable disease of irritable voice syndrome.

"Really Rach?" Quinn turns to her, "Not now."

"I can't help it. it's not my fault I'm so amazingly talented." Rachel bats her eyelashes and Quinn just laughs at her. I'm getting sick of seeing these two act so comfortable around each other. It's making me sick. I gag at the two of them to shut them up and it works. They turn back to me and focus their attention onto what actually matters.

"So I take it she didn't hint at anything either?" Quinn continues the questions and I shake my head no in response.

"Why do you look scared?" Rachel purses her eyes at me and I run my hands through my hair, frustrated.

"Because I don't know what's happening. Every time I talk to Britt it's different. She'll be really excited about it one minute and then the next she'll be freaking out and pretending to hide it. But I know she is. If she's freaking out then does that mean I should be too?"

"You _are_ freaking out." Quinn points out.

"Exactly."

Rachel chuckles as she sits up and grabs her phone from the side and starts typing away, "I know what you need." she tells me and puts her phone back down. Both Quinn and I are looking at her curiously when my bedroom door suddenly burst open revealing Sugar with a very creepy grin. Before I can question her, she runs and jumps on top of me.

"Santana!" Sugar yells into my ears and I flinch at the piercing noise, "I've been summoned by the almighty loud and annoying one to take you away." She grins at me and I feel almost scared. "Shopping time!" She screams, pulling me into a death hug.

"Yay!" Rachel claps her hands and I throw her a glare.

"Lets pick out wardrobe!" Sugar jumps off of me and heads straight for my closet.

I lean back in my chair and watch her rummaging through my clothes. I pick up my hairbrush and attempt to at least try getting ready. But if they think I'm paying a single cent of my money on this 'outing' then they are sadly mistaken. I'm totally content with staying at home and freaking out. I don't need to go out and take my mind off it.

"How about this?" Sugar blindly throws one of my shirts at me and it hits me on the side of my head. I pick it off me and eye it curiously before carefully folding it and putting it down on the other side of me.

"I don't wear pink." I tell her like it's obvious and she turns around with an amused expression.

"I know you don't." She smirks at me with her hands on her hips, "I just wanted to know why you have it. It's not yours and it's not mine. So whose is it?" She was baiting me, and I fell for it.

The heat rushes to my face before I can think to stop it and I know my cover is blown. I guess there's no use in hiding it now. I mumble Brittany's name softly and turn my head away as casually as I can.

"What was that?" Quinn grins and Rachel giggles next to her, "I didn't catch what you said."

"Brittany, alright?" I speak louder, "It's Britt's shirt. She must've forgot it or something."

"Forgot it?" Rachel questions, "How could she have forgotten her shirt? Unless-"

"She left wearing yours." Sugar finishes knowingly and peaks back into my closet, "You seem to be missing a certain 'Favorite Shirt' of yours."

"What the hell Mami? Do you have an inventory of my clothes or something?" I stand up and pull her away from my closet.

"I'm just saying." She holds her hands up in defense, "I did laundry this morning and it wasn't in there."

"You washed my clothes!?" I glare at her and she doesn't even flinch.

"No, Santana." She deadpans. "The laundry fairy comes every week and does it for you." She rolls her eyes and turns to the computer, "Is she serious?" she asks Rachel and Quinn, who in return laugh along.

I plop myself back down on my chair with a huff and fold my arms over my chest.

"Come on Santana don't get all fussy now. We just wanna know why you have Britt's shirt and she has yours." Quinn laughs and I try my best to not think about Brittany when I'm mad at these idiots.

"Don't fight it." Rachel smirks and I try harder.

"I can see it!" Sugar comes up next to me and pokes my cheek, "She trying to hide it," She squeals excitedly while poking my cheek again and the stupid smile I've been trying so hard to hold back finally breaks through.

Quinn and Rachel scream along with Sugar and I wince at the intensity.

"You did it!" Quinn points through the computer, "You fucking did it didn't you?"

Rachel explodes with long run on sentences and never ending babbling and Quinn just looks at me with all smiles. I turn to Sugar and see her smiling happily at me. Oddly enough, I thought Sugar would react the most after hearing the news. Maybe she figured it out earlier? I don't remember cleaning up the living room that night. The candles, my clothes, Britt's shirt, my _missing_ shirt. She probably put two and two together.

"Rachel stop talking," I hold my hand up and turn to Sugar fully and motion towards the door, "Shall we? I suddenly have the urge to leave."

"Fine," Sugar smiles and walks to my closet, grabbing an outfit and handing it to me when she comes back, "Bye guys!" She smiles at our friends and they wave quickly before she closes the screen.

I actually don't mind going out all that much. It just the whole getting ready thing that makes me want to stay home. I hate getting ready. It's tedious and I rather just lay in front of my television on my off days. Once I'm out though I tend to feel better. I think I'm just lazy.

"You think?" Sugar scoffs and I roll my eyes, "You _do _think out loud. It's _weird_."

"Okay you know what?" I turn to face her, "This is not 'Pick-On-Santana-Day'. I'm trying to keep my composure for tomorrow and you all need to just _not_." I cross my arms over my chest.

"I'm sorry," Sugar smiles and grab my arms, bringing them down, "I know you're freaking out," she squeezes my shoulders and I force a smile, "We're gonna take your mind off it today. Then tomorrow you can freak out again. Now go put your face on and your outfit cuz' I'm not letting you leave the house with me like this." she motions to my pajamas pants and fuzzy slippers.

"Hey!" I frown, "Nothing's wrong with my face."

"Mhmm," She lets go and walks towards the kitchen, "Whatever you say, S."

* * *

We hop out of Sugar's car and walk into the mall. It's always so crowded here.

I hate it.

"I know its last minute, Tammy." Sugar speaks into her phone as we make our way around a crowd of tourists, "This is an emergency. We need you, like, now."

"It's fine Mami," I try to tell Sugar but she shrugs me off and continues walking.

"No, it has to be today. Look, I babysitted your demon child for a whole two hours, Tam. You owe me." She argues further and I really begin to question if I wanna get my mani/pedi done by this woman now.

"Thanks hun." Sugar smiles and she gives me an overly excited thumbs up, "We're just outside."

Sugar stops and I turn to look at the shop. It's a cute small nail salon and I can make out an Asian lady inside waving ecstatically inside. Sugar returns it and quickly pulls me in after her.

"Tam-Tam!" She yells and they exchange one of those fake hugs people who just pretend to like each other do all the time, "This is my bestie, Santana." she motions to me and I hold my hand out to greet the woman.

Of course she doesn't take it.

She pulls me into a death hug and I squeal at the quick contact. God, this is so awkward. I return the hug half-assed, lightly tapping her on the back and putting on the best fake smile I can manage.

"So what can I do for you?" Her voice is thick with an accent as she pulls away and grabs one of my hands, "Sit, sit." She pushes me back and I fall into her chair, "Honey," She inspects my nails closer, "You need me." She scolds me and drops my hand.

"Alright!" Sugar claps and I look at her, "I'm off."

"What!?" I nearly yell, "To where?"

"Umm, shopping? Duh." She tells me like I'm stupid.

"You're just gonna leave me?" I plead with my eyes but Sugar doesn't budge.

"Tam-Tam got you," She pats Tammy on the shoulder, "You'll take care of my girl right?" She turns to Tammy and they share a nod. We both watch as Sugar walks out of the shop and turn the corner. She seriously just left me here.

"Thank God," Tammy lets out a huge breath and speaks in a normal voice, "Your friend over there is a handful."

"What the hell? What happen to your accent?" I eye her mouth like there must be some sort of on and off switch in there.

She shrugs and lets out a chuckle, "The ditsy ones always tip better if I have an accent. It supposedly makes me 'better' at my job."

"Seriously?" I ask her and she takes my hand to get started, "Isn't that like prejudicial or something? You don't get offended?"

"Nah, not really. If it goes too far I'll just kick their ass."

"So, Sugar has no idea your accent is faked?" I question further as she sits forward and begins on my nails.

"Nope." She shakes her head, "She doesn't even know I was born and raised here. She thinks I'm from some country I made up."

I watch her as she concentrates on my nails and chuckle softly to myself.

"I think we're gonna get along just fine."

* * *

I thank Tammy and promise to come back and visit her again sometime. She gives me her card and I take it before putting it into my wallet. "You sure it's okay?" I ask her one last time as she pushes me out the door.

"Yeah, don't worry about it. We charge Sugar weekly around here, I'll just add it in. Tip included." She winks, "Now go find a hot dress for your equally as hot girlfriend. Good luck tomorrow."

With one last hug, no longer awkward or forced, I leave Tammy and her shop behind me. I pull out my phone and try calling Sugar a few times but her phone must be on silent because she doesn't answer. After about the fifth attempt to reach her, I angrily throw my phone back into my purse.

"Where the hell are you, Motta?" I mutter to myself as I walk up to an empty area in the middle of the mall and look around. Okay think, if I were her, where would I go?

I head off to the most expensive places first, and then work my way down. It's either this or food court. I weave through the crowds and quickly peak in random stores. Damn this place, so many damn people around me, is there a sale or something?

And just like that I walk face first into a giant sign that reads 'Sidewalk Sale! TWO DAYS ONLY!'

"Fuuuuck!" I curse out loud as I rub my forehead, "What the fuck, God? Why do you hate me!?" I ramble on in Spanish under my breath as I pick myself off the ground. I seemed to have earned the attention of the crowd around me though because everyone is just staring at me. "What are you looking at?" I glare at a few giggling teenagers.

I begin to walk around the sign and the crowd makes way for me. I make it to the food court and eye the occupants until something catches my attention. Blonde. Blonde hair. Not just any blonde hair. _Brittany's_ blonde hair.

I smile like an idiot when I realize it's really her and not just my head playing tricks on me. It's only the back of her head but I know. I know it's her. Plus Sugar is sitting right across of her.

"Mami!" I shout out for my best friend. Sugar's eyes dart to mine and widen drastically, almost comically even. "Hey!" I shout again and start to wave from far away. She doesn't wave though but instead stands up suddenly and turns her head back to Brittany, frantically telling her something. Sugar keeps looking back at me with the most scared expression I've ever seen on her.

"Valerie?" I notice the little girl sitting beside Sugar and I quirk an eyebrow. What the hell is Val doing here?

The girl in question looks to where Sugar is looking and spots me, her face brightens by the second as she realizes who I am. She turns to Brittany and everything happens in slow motion from there.

Sugar takes a hold of Val's arm and shakes her head. Valerie doesn't seem to like that though because she breaks free from Sugar and starts running straight for me. Brittany and Sugar stand and call out for her but she doesn't stop. The moment she reaches me the puzzle pieces start to come together.

_It can't be._

"Auntie 'Tana!" The little one runs right into my legs and I stare at her for long seconds before lifting my head to glance towards the other two still standing by their table.

"Valerie?" I crouch down and eye the little girl suspiciously, "What are you doing here?"

"Stop calling me that." She fake frowns and I pinch her cheeks softly, "That's not my name."

"That's your name to me, though." I smile with another pinch and she giggles, "Now answer my question."

"I'm with my mommy." She explains and I look back to Sugar and Brittany. "Come!" Valerie grabs my hand and begins to pull me towards them, "Meet my mommy!" She screams back at me and I shut my eyes momentarily, the tug of my arm being the only thing to guide me.

_It can't be._

She pulls me closer and I open my eyes again.

_It can't be._

She pulls me straight to _Brittany_.

_It is._

It's silent. For a while actually. Brittany is looking at me and I'm looking at her. I turn to face Sugar who is studying my expression. It's as if she's trying to gauge, something. Does she not know? Did she honestly think I would react any other way?

"How?" I ask her and she closes her eyes in disappointment. She was wrong. She was hoping for something else. I clench my jaw at the sight.

"Santana-" Brittany tries but I don't let her finish because I just walk away. I don't even run. It's slow, and agonizing, and I feel like I'm dying with every step.

They call out for me.

* * *

I make it home from the bus stop and throw my bag straight into the wall. One of my nails breaks in the process and the anger intensifies when the pain shoots up my arm. It worsens when I think about the why I got them done in the first place.

My feet drag across the floor as I make my way to the bathroom and I hear the door open and close behind me. I manage to close the door of the bathroom before they reached me.

"Santana?" Sugar tries first but I don't answer. I'm just trying to take everything in. Should I even be angry? I mean sure, Brittany having a kid this whole time is shocking as hell but should I be mad? It's not that big of a deal right?

"Santana," Brittany knocks on the door, "Please open the door. Let me explain."

I shake my head and lean against the wall. She kept this from me. What about Sugar? How long has she known? Has she been keeping it from me this whole time? What about Devin? He must've known too.

Wait. Sugar is Val's babysitter. So she had to have known this whole time.

"Britt, maybe you should go home. I'll try talk to her and maybe tomorrow we can sort it out together." I hear Sugar whisper on the other side of the door. At least try to whisper. It's so quiet that I can practically hear them breathing as I'm frozen in place, unable to move. I don't know whether I should be freaking out or throwing things.

"Mama," Brittany whispers back and I turn my head to the door, that word repeating over and over again until it finally registers.

_Mama._

_Mama._

_Mama_.

_Mama._

_Mama._

And that's all it took to pull me straight from shock into full blown rage. I fling the door open so fast that it nearly rips off its hinges, "Are you _fucking_ kidding me!?" I yell.

Brittany and Sugar step back from surprise, "Santana," Brittany reaches out for my hand but I pull back, "It's not what you think." Brittany holds her hands up to calm me down.

"Mama?" I turn to Sugar and her face pulls into shock before softening and then slowly nodding her head, "Seriously? What the fuck!" I scream and run my hand over my face. I guess that means I should be freaking out _and _throwing things.

"Lower your voice," Sugar whispers, "Please Santana. Let's just sit down and talk about this. There's a lot to explain."

"No." I shake my head, "I think I understand enough as it is. I can't believe this," I clench my jaw again, "I fucking confided in you about Mama." I tell Sugar, "I talked to you about everything. No wonder you kept changing the subject. This whole fucking time it was you. You both lied to me."

"We never lied." Brittany shakes her head and I scoff at her.

"No, you just withheld the truth. Or should I say your _daughter_?"

"Please, It's not what you think, Santana. Just sit down and let me explain."

"She said _'mom', _Britt. There's only so many ways a person can interpret that." I bite back.

"I'm not though! I'm not her mom!" She begins to get frustrated and honestly all I could think about is how dare she act like she deserves to be the one that's frustrated from all this.

"Well she sure seems to think so!" I yell again and Brittany flinches, "Four months Brittany. You failed to mention that you had a _child_ for four fucking months. Don't you think that's something worth telling me about? It's a pretty huge thing to hide!"

"Alright this isn't really my fight anymore so I'm just gonna go over there." Sugar awkwardly steps back.

"And you!" I point to Sugar angrily, "_Mama_ or whoever the fuck you are to each other. You fucking knew! You knew this whole time, and didn't say anything. What kind of best friend does shit like that?" I yell at her and she ducks her head.

"It's not her fault, Santana." Brittany stops me, "I told her to keep it a secret. I wanted to be the one to tell you. I'm so sorry." she tells me first before turning to Sugar, "I'm so so sorry."

"The dinner?" My eyes begin to burn so I shut them, "You both knew then. Is that's why it was awkward?" I ramble on more to myself as everything comes into place, "I feel so fucking stupid."

"Please don't curse," Brittany pleads as she glances behind her and I know that her daughter or Val or whoever she is, is in the living room. She can probably hear this whole exchange.

"Tell me you didn't lie to me. Tell me that what you both did was the right thing to do. Tell me that you believed hiding the fact that you have a daughter was in any way means to a happy end?" I look straight into her eyes, "You can't can you?"

"Santana-"

"Just leave me alone, Britt. I wanna be alone right now. Just leave." I step back into the bathroom and slowly shut the door. Sugar and Brittany no longer say anything. I can faintly make out footsteps and the front door closing.

"Santana," Sugar taps the door softly, "They're gone now." I listen as she sighs and walks away and into her own room, shutting her door behind her and I finally allow my knees to give in as I collapse. My breath is short and I feel like my chest is about to concave into itself. My eyes burn again as if it were flooded with tears but nothing comes.

I'm so broken I can't even cry properly.

* * *

I wake up in the bathtub the next morning. I don't even remember getting in this damn thing. I stretch out and rub the back of my neck as I sit up. Great, now my neck is going to be a bitch for the next few days. I strip all my clothes off slowly and turn the water on. The moment the cold liquid hits me I'm shocked into reality and everything comes crashing down again.

And I can't tell if I'm crying or not.

After my shower I wrap a towel around myself and slowly make my way to my bedroom. I smell breakfast being made and I know Sugar is awake. I make it to my closet and throw on the first things I see. I don't plan on leaving the house anyway so these should be fine.

"Hey," Sugar taps on my door and peeks in, "I made some breakfast if you want." She comes in and places a plate of food next to my computer, "I'm gonna be home all day today if you need me."

She watches me as I sit on my bed and just stare at the wall. I don't even look at her. How could I?

"Look I know you're mad, Santana. But I really think you should call Brittany. Let her explain everything to you." She tells me with one more lingering look and leaving the room.

I finally look to the plate of food and roll my eyes. Of course she'd make my favorite. Dinosaur pancakes. I stand up and grab the plate, looking at the food one last time before placing it outside of my door and shutting myself in for the day.

The minutes pass slowly. I seemed to have survived morning by eating an old granola bar that was in my cheerleading bag. I tried to take my mind off everything by catching up on some assignments for my classes but then I just kept thinking about Brittany and how she looked concentrating in the middle of class and my brain just went fuzzy.

Speaking of, I go into my purse and pull out my phone. Brittany's face shows on my screen after unlocking it and I notice the bomb of missed calls and new messages. I ignore them and place my phone next to my computer.

It would have been today. Is this the big thing she was going to tell me? If I haven't run into them yesterday and instead found out when I was supposed to, would I have reacted differently? If the universe had just waited one more day, maybe. Maybe I would've been okay.

"Santana?" Sugar opens my door again, "We're coming in, okay?" She hesitantly opens the door wider and reveals Devin next to her. He turns to Sugar and she nods, assuring him as they both walk up to me.

"How you holding up?" Devin places his hand on my shoulder and I don't move. I don't even look at him. He lied to me too. They all did. They all knew but said nothing. Who does that?

"Maybe it was a bad idea to let you come over," Sugar tells him and he shakes his head at her.

"No, she's just overreacting. She'll get over it." He turns to her and I inwardly scoff. Overreacting? Is that what he thinks? He kneels down and turns my chair to face him. "Santana, you can't shut us out forever. I'm your friend." Devin tries and that's when I finally break my silence. _My friend? _We'll see about that.

"Get out." It's barely a whisper but I know they heard me because it grew silent.

"Santana-" Sugar places her hand on my shoulder and I flinch. She pulls back and I turn my head to stare at her.

"Either the both of you get out, or I will." I speak slowly and clearly, "I will pack my shit, break the lease agreement, and leave. I don't mind having to share living space with you, Richie Bitch, but this is _my_ room. And you are no longer welcome to walk in and out as you please. So if you and _your friend_ here want to invade _my_ personal space, I'll leave."

I stare deep into her eyes and I don't even see the tears. I don't see them because I no longer care.

"Now get the hell out of my room."

* * *

**AN: Please don't hate me... We all knew this was coming. Believe me, I love you all so much that I tried to rewrite my outline around the idea of San finding out and it going well but it was just too hard. I had this planned since the beginning and it would be a huge deal to change it now. So try to keep the Britt hate to a minimum, kay? Haha. We have a bumpy road ahead of us, just hold tight :) **

**"moms will b ok."**

**On another note: This whole 'baby mama drama' thing will last for a few chapters. For those chapters, I will not be posting immediately after I'm done with them. I want to write them all at once and then release them one by one every week. That way it goes smoothly and you're all not waiting for random periods of time for the next update.**

**If you need me, you can PM me or find me on Twitter or Tumblr. **

**Talk to you soon loves,**

**Em :)**


	16. Stubborn

**AN: You're gonna wanna watch this first... **

youtube . com (/) watch?v=I36fARKzWQ0

Take out the spaces and ()

**Santana POV**

* * *

Chapter 16: Stubborn

It's been a few weeks now. I've lost count of the official number of times she has called or texted me. I remember sometime last week was about fifteen times a day. It's lessened to only a few calls and few texts in the past couple days but now I've got Quinn or Rachel calling me nonstop, even Kurt and Blaine called a couple of times. Naturally I didn't pick any of them up.

"See ya," I mutter as I quickly pass Sugar in the hallway and make my way into my car. Things have gotten better between us. I still don't forgive her for what she did but at least I'm not completely ignoring her now. Just before I pull out of the driveway Sugar comes out of the house and taps on my window. I roll my eyes and roll the window down slightly.

"You forgot your coffee," She tries to smile but I'm pretty sure she's a little scared of me still.

I roll the window down lower and she hands me the cup. "Thanks," I tell her as I place it into my cup holder. She backs away and I'm finally on my way to school. So far I've missed every other class. I just don't really feel like seeing, _her_. Devin too. Sometimes I freak out and think that I'll run into one of them on my way to my other classes that I just end up not going to any of them either.

I pass the familiar bus stop down the road and resist the urge to look, to see if she's there. It is Wednesday after all. If she is there, did she see me? She knows my car, I know she does. I shake all those thoughts out of my head and continue to drive forward. There's only one way to know for sure if she's seen me.

And just like clockwork my phone vibrates in my cup holder next to my coffee and I know it's her. I don't even have to check to know what it says.

_Good morning, San. See you in class..._

She only sends it on the days she sees me. On the days she knows that she'll see me in class. The first time it happened I freaked out. But for some reason, I never felt the need to change my route to school. It wouldn't be that hard. It'd actually be easier to change it. If i think about it, the bus stop is actually going out of my way. I think some part of me wants her to see me. Or maybe some part of me wants that text in the morning. To remind me that she still wants to try.

* * *

She walks into class ten minutes late and I curse inwardly at myself for glaring at that kid that wanted to sit next to me. Because now that's the only open seat next to me. Would it be overreacting if I got up and left? Probably.

"Sorry," She apologizes to the class and takes her seat. I feel her glance at me for a second and then look away quickly, slowly taking her seat next to me and unpacking her notebooks and pencils.

I watch her through the side of my eye and I honestly don't know if I can handle sitting next to her for the rest of this class. I don't even know what I'm feeling right now. I can't tell if I'm still mad or just completely over it by now. Alright, I'm probably not completely over it but whatever, I deserve the right to be as stubborn as I want.

"I miss you," She whispers next to me and it pulls me completely from my thoughts. I can't tell if my mind is playing tricks on me though because when I look at her she's just looking to the front, concentrating on our professor.

_Did I just imagine that?_

I study her face for any signs of movement until finally the slight twitch of her lip forms a small smile, "No, you didn't imagine it." She whispers and continues to take notes from the board.

I almost smile with her. _Almost_.

* * *

Leave it to the universe to fuck with my day. Not only did I have to actually go to class today or else I'd fail, I had to bear through said class sitting next to the one person that broke my damn heart while trying not to look at her every five seconds. Only to arrive to my third class with one single seat open next to Devin, person who broke my heart's best friend. Jesus must love me.

"Heeeeey," Devin whispers in the same tone of voice as a person would talk to you after finding out your dog just died, "So you still mad?" He continues to draw out his words and I try not to launch my fist into his mouth, "Yeah you're still mad huh?" He goes on and this time I turn to glare at him. Is he serious right now?

He holds his hand up defensively and turns toward the front and I do the same. I really don't feel like having a heart to heart right now with someone who basically lied to me this whole time. Today is just not my day.

"So how you feeling about the whole kid thing?" He whispers closer to me, the tone of voice even worse this time and I snap my head towards him, "You taking it all in? How you holding up? You want a hug?" He finishes and I know he's mocking me now.

"Are you kidding me?" I snap and he nods like it's obvious, "Can I please just get through this class without you talking to me?" I turn back to my notes. "I already had enough of this shit this morning."

"Alright fine," Devin stops using that irritating voice and sits up, "I'm not mad at you though. So whenever you feel the need to apologize, I'm all ears." He goes back to his textbook and flips through some pages.

"_Seriously_?" My mouth drops open from his comment, "Are you seriously telling me that_ I _should be the one apologizing to _you_?" I turn to him fully, nearly turning my entire seat into the conversation too.

"Yeah I'm serious." He nods his head, "Look you can be as mad as you want about the fact that she has a kid. But just don't be mad at me and Sugar for not telling you."

"I'm not mad about the kid part of it. I get it, she has daughter. Sure it's a lot to take in but I'm not mad about it. I'm upset at myself for ever trusting you guys." I cross my arms over my chest and huff. By now a few other students are listening in.

"It wasn't our place to tell and you know it," He laughs softly and I raise an eyebrow, "And just so you know, we weren't all happy and jumping up and down at the thought of keeping it from you. She asked us to let _her _be the one to tell you. It was supposed to be a special moment for her. She was finally going to let you into that part of her life. There was a whole dinner/outing type thing planned and it would've been amazing." He crosses his arms over his chest in the same fashion and I uncross mine in protest.

"Don't feed me that shit. She should've told me sooner. Even the Mama thing!" I spit back and he rolls his eyes.

"She couldn't tell you about Sugar being her babysitter without telling you the whole thing."

"I went crazy, night after night, thinking about Mama and who she is or why she's involved. To find out that it was my best friend all along is like the stupidest thing. I feel fucking _stupid_, played even."

"Well then that's on you, Santana." He points his finger at me and I swat it away, "Maybe if you just talked to her and let her explain everything to you, maybe you'd understand where she's coming from. She had to choose on _multiple _occasions between her daughter and you. You can't blame her for not choosing you. Do you know how conflicted she was on Valentine's Day? She was a freaking mess."

"How would you know?" I scoff at that, remembering that day, "We were together on Valentine's Day. Joel dumped your ass for work, remember?"

"Don't try to bring Joel into this." He shakes his head, "I only know she was a mess because I was with her the night before. We were all at her place trying to figure out what we could do."

"What you could do?" I question and he nods. What the hell is he talking about?

"She already made plans with her daughter for Valentine's Day. She didn't even realize that you asked her on a date for the same day until Ryan pointed it out to her."

"That's where she was?" I lower my voice and let that sink in, "She was with her daughter?"

"Yeah," He begins to put his books back into his bag, "Because before anything, her daughter will always come first. That's something that I thought you'd respect about her." He zips his bag up and looks at me, "I guess I was wrong."

The professor in the front of the class clears his throat and we both snap our attention to him, "Are you two done over there? I'd like to get back to my lecture." He puts his hands on his waist and looks at us expectantly, the rest of the class looking at the both of us too.

"I was just leaving." Devin stands up and grabs his bag, "Seriously Santana, I honestly thought you'd at least give her a chance to explain." He tells me before turning and walking out of the class.

"Damn," A classmate in front of me looks at the closing doors before looking at me, "What the hell did you do?"

"Fuck off," I tell him and turn back to my textbook.

I fucking hate today. Thank god I don't have school tomorrow. I just have to bear through work and then exams the day after that. Once that's over, I'm finally free.

* * *

"Daniel!" I yell through my megaphone, "I swear if you drop her again I will rip your head off." I bring my free hand up to my forehead and rub my temple, "I shouldn't even be saying _again_! There should be no dropping of any cheerleaders on this squad!"

He nods reassuringly and gets back into position. They go over the routine a few more times until it's completely flawless and I finally let them hit the showers. I've been really hard on them recently. For obvious reasons, but they don't know that. I'm trying to loosen up though. I really don't need more angry parents attacking me because of a stupid broken ankle or sprained neck. Bunch of babies.

"Hey Coach?" Daniel jogs up to me as I'm putting some of the equipment away.

"What now?" I drop everything and rest my hands on my waist.

"Just wanted to let you know your girlfriend is waiting for you." He steps back cautiously and points to the bleachers on the other side of the field, "She told me to let you know." He turns around and they both exchange waves, "She didn't say the girlfriend part but I just figured she was from the last time she stopped by," He goes on and I really wish he didn't. I don't want to remember those moments.

"Thanks, Daniel," I turn away from him and go back to packing up the equipment, "But she's not my girlfriend."

"For real?" He asks me and he glances back to the bleachers again, "Mind if I move in on that then?" He runs his hands through his hair and pats his shirt down.

"Knock yourself out, kid."

I grab everything that I can and head back to the locker rooms. I clearly didn't think this through though because now I have no hand to open my damn equipment room door. Cursing inwardly at myself I try to maneuver around everything that I'm carrying to at least just get a grip on the handle.

"Here, let me," She suddenly comes running up to me and leans in to open the door. I swear I don't think I'll ever get used to the smell of her damn hair. I mutter a small thanks and proceed to put everything away. She stands by the doorway and just watches me. Finally she speaks up, "Did you have anything to do with," She eyes a sheet of paper in her hand, "Daniel? Anything to do with this Daniel kid giving me his digits?" She smiles at me and I walk past her and back onto the field. I hear her take in a breath before following me.

"I just told him you're single." I respond back with a shrug and she stops walking. I turn around slowly and she's just standing there. Looking at me with sad blue eyes but I hold my resolve, "Am I wrong?" I twist the knife and she ducks her head.

She shakes her head softly and whispers, "I don't get why you're doing this."

_Me neither._ Somebody please pull me out of this crazy funk I'm in. It's like I'm being pushed and pulled and I don't even know where I stand sometimes. I've never been so unsure in my life.

"I just thought we could work it out." She looks up and I look away quickly, finding something, anything to keep me occupied long enough for this conversation to end. I grab my clipboard and begin to scribble random lines and shapes, "Don't do that." She speaks louder, "Don't build up your walls. It's just me here."

She doesn't get it. That's exactly my point. It's just her.

"I got work after this so I gotta go. Sorry if I disappointed you." I grab the rest of my things and make my way to the parking lot.

"What do you mean?" She turns around but stays in place, just watching me walk away.

"You obviously didn't get what you came here for." I yell behind my back without turning around.

"Not yet." She yells back and I chuckle softly to myself. Girls got drive, I'll give her that. I guess she finally realized the endless amount of phone calls and text messages where getting her nowhere.

* * *

Today is just another bad fucking day to be Santana Lopez. In fact, Yesterday sucked too. And the day before that too.

But today of all days is the day I'm going to be late for class. It's just one more class, one freaking exam, and I'm free. So why did I have to be late _this _time? The moment I get out of my car I run straight for my building. Seriously, how is it that the only parking stall I could get is on the other side of campus? Of course, right?

What makes things even better though, is that when I get to my class and go through those stupid doors, my professor is 'running late', meaning I didn't even need to run. But it doesn't stop there. Oh no, the universe isn't done fucking with me yet because of course the only seat open is next to her. Of fucking course. Cherry on top the fucking cake. What the hell is up with this week and there just being one seat left for the past three classes with these people. What are the freaking odds of that? I sigh in defeat as I drag myself to the open chair.

"I thought you weren't going to show." She looks at me with sad eyes, "I was getting worried."

"Well you have nothing to worry about." I snap back, "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself." I tell her as I try to subtly move my chair just a little further away. I'm such a fucking child sometimes.

"I know," She ducks her head as I take my seat, "It's just that this final exam is really important. I didn't want you to miss it because-"

"Can we not?" I hold my hand up to stop her from continuing any further, "I don't really feel like having this conversation right now."

"Santana," She grabs my hand and I freeze, the strange warmth of her usual touch now lacking, it's cold, almost empty now. "Can we talk after class?" She tries to move her head so that she can look me in the eyes.

"Not really." I shake my head and look away, pulling my hand free from her grasp, "I've got class after."

"I know you don't." She tells me matter of factly, "You know that I know your schedule so why are you acting like this?" She bites back and shakes her head, "How many more times do I have to say that I'm sorry for you to forgive me?" She pleads with me and I clench my jaw.

"Well you can stop. I'm over it already." I shrug and begin to unpack my notes and pencil case.

"I don't understand," I can hear it in her voice, the way it quivers slightly. She's trying to hold it together.

"I'm done." I turn to look her in the eyes. So that she knows I mean it, "There's nothing left to understand." I say it like it meant nothing, like it was easy to say. Like it's the truth. Because for me, there's no going back to how it was. She doesn't say anything after that. She just sits down as the class starts and the professor hands out our final exams.

Halfway through the exam I begin to notice how she keeps lifting her hand to her face. She's crying. And doing a horrible job at hiding it because a few people are staring at her now, "Sorry," she whispers, "I don't even know why I'm crying," She turns slightly towards me and I fight the urge to hold her.

Just as I'm about to reach out, she grabs her things and leaves. Her 'important' exam left behind and forgotten.

* * *

I can't seem to get the image of her crying out of my mind. I've never seen her so sad before. I bring my hands to my face and try to rub the memory from my brain. It obviously doesn't work. Every word I write, every line, it reminds me of her. I close my notebook and run my fingers over my laptop keyboard, feeling each button and letter before moving onto my mouse. I move quickly before I can tell myself to stop and just like that I'm connecting to another computer.

"I'm glad you're not dead." Quinn smiles at me through my screen and I attempt to smile back. It's refreshing to finally look at someone who didn't stab me in the back. Well, recently anyway. High school doesn't count anymore.

"I want to understand," I rest my elbows on my desk and my head falls into place in my palms, "You're the only one that can help me." I tell her and she nods.

"You sure you want my advice?" She tilts her head and I nod, "I _was_ kinda the one who didn't trust her in the first place..."

"I know." I tell her, "But you're also the only other mother I know right now. Besides my own, but I don't even want to think about going there. I need _your _help, Q."

"Alrighty then," She stands up and closes her bedroom door. I raise my eyebrow in questioning and she just responds with, "Rachel." I nod along and she sits back down.

"Lay it on me."

"I think you're being completely irrational." She deadpans suddenly and my jaw drops.

"Seriously?"

"Santana, just listen to me," She holds her finger up and starts counting, "First of all, you're Santana Lopez, which means you'll probably be ten times more dramatic than you need to be. Second, 'Stubborn' should be your middle name. Third, she was going to tell you. So what if you found out on accident? Don't hold it against the poor girl for trying to turn it into special moment for the three of you instead of just coming out and being all like '_I have a daughter, deal with it._' And last but not least, I _actually_ have a daughter, and if it were up to me, I'd hide her away from anything and everything too."

"You're seriously defending her?" I ask, baffled at the change in attitude towards her. Just a few months ago she was basically telling me to drop this so called crush and move on.

"Hey, you came to _me_ for help and understanding, okay? If you're looking for a different response then go call Rachel. That girl is beyond mad about this whole thing." She motions to her closed door annoyingly, "Girl won't shut up about it."

"What? Why?"

"Maybe because she's the only one you confided in about Taylor." She tells me obviously, "Like it or not, RuPaul is your best friend too. And she's definitely not a happy camper when her best friends get hurt."

I hadn't even realized Rachel was the only one I opened up to about Taylor. No wonder she's been calling me nonstop. At least one of my friends has their heads screwed on straight, "I can't believe you think I'm being irrational. Everyone lied to me."

"So what?" Quinn rolls her eyes again, "Stop being such a baby about it. They lied because she asked them too. They didn't do it for laughs, Santana. She had the right to be the one to tell you. Sure at some point it would've gone too far but it didn't." She pauses and thinks for a second, "Okay, maybe it did a little but you can't blame her. She was scared."

"I was scared too." I mutter under my breath but Quinn hears it anyway.

"You were scared for yourself, Santana. She was scared for her _daughter_. You have to at least understand that."

"Look, can we talk about something else now?" I huff as I lean back in my seat. I'm so over talking about my love life at this point.

"Fine," Quinn takes a deep breath at sits back. It's a long pause before she thinks of something else to change the subject to, "Did you book your flight to Lima yet?" She asks me, grabbing a nail filer and attempting to do her nails.

"Why would I?" I shrug and grab my own nail file. How dare she try to mimic me. Nail filing is _my _thing when I'm feeling extra bitchy.

"Santana," Quinn drops the object in her hand and looks at me through the computer.

"Quinn," I mock her tone of voice and smirk back at her.

"Santana, you can't shut all of us out." She sighs, "It's going to be the two year anniversary next month. You can't _not_ come. We promised Mr. Schue and Mrs. Pillsbury."

"I know," I groan loudly, "God, you can be so annoying sometimes. Look, I already got the tickets." I go into my side drawer and grab my printed receipt, waving them in front of the camera for good measure, "Sugar already pestered me about it last week. I only agreed because she offered to pay for my bag check."

Quinn laughs at that, "Of course she did. Sometimes I wonder how that girl survives."

"Yeah, me too. I guess Bri-" I stop myself and shake my head, "Her job pays well probably." I look away from the computer to hide my face, "Alright well I gotta go, Q. I'll see you back in Lima."

There's a pause before she says anything. She's probably trying to figure me out, "Right." She settles on letting me be and not questioning further, "Well I can't wait to get the gang back together again. Even if it's for a sad occasion."

"It's not sad," I finally turn back to my laptop when I'm composed, "It's just life."

* * *

I walk into the bar feeling a different kind of excited. Greg never calls me unless it's important. Sure last time it was because he got the bartending gig at our favorite open mic place, but still, discounted drinks and free shots _are _important.

"Hey Greg," I smile at the familiar face, "You called me here for what exactly? It's not open mic so what the hell was so damn important that I needed to be here tonight?" I ask him and he scrunches his face up apologetically. Wait, Greg knew her too. "Fuck," I curse and roll my eyes, "Not you too-"

"Santana," Her soft voice fills the bar and I flinch at the sound. I should've known this was going to happen. I look to the front and find her standing there on the stage, microphone in hand. I quickly look towards the exit but realize it's too late to form an escape plan now seeing as Greg and a few other bouncer looking men are blocking the way.

I run my hand through my hair and sigh. I'm fucking trapped.

"Please don't leave," She begins to speak again and I shut my eyes in hopes that this will all go away. "I know you're here. Greg gave me the thumbs up earlier and I'm pretty sure I can see you by the bar. The lights are really bright up here and I can barely see anything but I know it's you because I know what you look like when you're freaking out." She continues and I open my eyes again, "So stop pacing back and forth and speaking in Spanish to yourself. Just sit down."

I hadn't even noticed I was doing those things. I stop immediately, angry that she knows me so well.

"I thought I was doing the right thing. I honestly believed that. And then things began to unravel and I think I just kept making it worse and worse." She walks to the edge of the stage and sits down, her feet dangling in front of her. The patrons of the bar trying to subtly look between the two of us.

"Santana just give her a chance to explain. You owe her that much." Greg comes up next to me and places a hand on my back, letting me sit down as he walks away.

"You probably don't want to be here right now, so I'll make this quick." She motions to the left of her and within seconds a tall skinny man walks up to the piano behind her, "I'm a dancer at heart but tonight I'm not gonna dance. Because that night you told me you loved me, was the most amazing night of my life and I want to show you how much you mean to me in a way that dancing won't provide."

I fight the tears that so desperately want to be set free as the music starts and her voice floats through the air. It's soft. Softer than Songbird is. I don't think I can handle this.

_This is more than a typical kind of thing_

_Felt the jolts in my bones when you were touching me_

_Oh oh didn't wanna take it slow_

I was right, I can't. I grab my purse and walk towards the exit. Luckily for me, everyone is paying attention to the stage that no one is blocking the doors. The moment I make it pass the double doors I freeze, and then I feel myself backing up until my spine is hitting the wall. I can't leave. I need to hear the rest. I have to. This is closure.

_In a daze going crazy, I can barely think_

_You're replaying through my brain, I find it hard to sleep_

_I'm waiting for my phone to blow_

I feel myself sliding down the wall until I hit the floor and I hug my knees. I shouldn't be acting this way. "Where'd she go?" I hear Greg question someone close to the door, "Shit, you were supposed to be guarding the exit!" He whispers loudly and I realize she doesn't even know I've left. Her singing continues and I'm technically not even there to hear it.

_See I've been waiting all day_

_For you to call me baby_

_So let's get up, let's get on it_

_Don't you leave me brokenhearted tonight._

The streams of tears are released and I don't even try to fight it this time. I know I'm acting stupid. I know she meant well. How stubborn am I if I don't want to just accept it and move on? I'm not even angry anymore. I'm just stuck. It's so much more easier to close myself off again than to accept her apologies and explanations. The trust has been shattered, my trust for everyone. What does she want from me? What more can she possibly take?

_And honest baby I'll do anything you want to_

_So can we finish what we started?_

_Don't you leave me brokenhearted tonight,_

_I can't seem to let you go._

The song ends and I pick myself off the floor and wipe my face from the tears. Taking a deep breath in, I freeze once again when I hear her voice.

"Where is she?" She asks, her voice soft and vulnerable, "She left?" I hear her ask Greg and the lyrics of the song repeat in my head_. Don't you leave me brokenhearted_.

"I'm so sorry, B" Greg tells her and I can almost hear her heart breaking from where I'm standing.

I'm right here, just pass these doors. I want her to find me. I want her to look. But she doesn't. She cries instead and this time I actually _can_ hear her heart breaking through these doors. I find myself stuck again. My body, wanting me to go back inside but my brain is telling me to just walk away. It's a first actually. Usually my first instinct is to run away from feelings when my brain is telling me to fight for it. I think I'm broken. My brain has officially closed off. The walls are up and there's no use in trying to break them back down.

So I walk away.

* * *

**AN: It's an honor to be mentioned by hlnwst! Honestly, if any of you haven't been reading her stories, then you need to do so NOW. And I mean all of them. She's amazing and I'm a huge fan. Thanks for the rec!**

**Also, I hadn't finished up to 20 like I said. I only finished up to 18 but I figured you guys deserved an update already. So hopefully this little head start I've created for myself works out for you guys. Again, thank you all so much for your love and patience. **

**Fun (Or not) fact: Brittany's name is never mentioned in this chapter. Santana is doing what she did with Taylor and never saying her name or even thinking it.**

**AN2: Dear fandom. Please do not give up. I love you all so much. No matter what happens in canon, our hearts are here. Glee may have planted the seed but our fanfiction writers are the ones that watered and nurtured it to what it is now. We as a fandom built Brittana. _We_ are the ones that brought character and depth to our favorite couple. _We_ are the ones that gave them heart and soul and understanding. _We_ are the ones that know that they're soulmates. Don't stop writing. Don't lose inspiration. Never give up. Never.  
**


	17. The Tutor and His Wife

**AN: After more research, it's come to my attention that a minor cannot be emancipated in Ohio for reasons such as Brittany's. The only way to emancipate oneself in the state of Ohio is by legal marriage or by joining military service. I had tweaked the storyline a bit to allow Brittany to do so. So now her father died when she was 15, instead of 16, allowing her time to get everything in order.**

**I have no idea if it makes sense legally but I tried. If anyone has any insight to this topic then please let me know.**

**A LOT of flashbacks in this one. They will be _italicized_** **as usual.**

**Brittany Pov**

* * *

Chapter 17: The Tutor and His Wife

"_She said 'mom' Britt, there's only so many ways a person can interpret that."_

"_I'm not though! I'm not her mom!"_

The same thing replays in my mind every time those small deep eyes stare up at me. I can't believe I said that. She heard me, without a doubt. If she hadn't then things wouldn't be like this. But she did, and now she's holding it in. All I can do is wait now.

Wait until she asks me. I've been preparing myself for this since she was born and I've decided to tell her when she asks me. When she thinks she's ready for it. She would've figured it out eventually, it was only a matter of time.

She'll want to know who her real parents are.

* * *

"_Pierce?" The lady at the receptionist desk calls out my name and I look up quickly at her. I'm so nervous. Maybe I could leave now and forget about this whole thing. Maybe it was a mistake to come here. "Brittany Pierce?" She calls out again and this time I stand up as I close the magazine I was reading and put it down on the coffee table._

"_That's me," I walk up to the woman and she smiles, "Sorry I didn't hear you the first time." I lie._

"_Don't worry about it." She eyes me carefully and smiles again, "Follow me please." She turns around and walks through the office door in the back, "You don't need to be scared," She says, turning towards me slightly so that I can hear her, "You're just here for information. Nothing big is going to happen today just from you asking questions."_

_I nod softly and continue to follow her through the office space. There are cubicles everywhere and phones are ringing left and right around me. Finally we make it to our destination and I wait outside the tiny wall while the receptionist leans in._

"_Your 3:30 is here, Ma'am." The receptionist tells the person inside as she hands her the sheet of paper I filled out earlier, "Brittany Pierce, age 15."_

"_Thank you, Aubrey." A woman's voice comes from inside and I have this strange feeling that I recognize it, "Hm, why does that name sound familiar? What's her reason for being here?" The woman inside continues and I know for a fact now that I heard that voice before, I just can't place it._

_Aubrey leans back out and winks at me, "She's just here for information."_

_The woman inside stands up and I finally get to see her face for the first time. No wait, I know that face. I knit my eyebrows together in confusion and shock, "Mrs.-"_

"_Well this is a nice surprise," The older woman smiles at Aubrey and they nod at each other before the receptionist leaves to go back to her post._

"_Mrs.-"_

"_Brittany," She interrupts me and holds her hand out, "It's been a while."_

_I take it lightly and she pulls me into her cubicle to sit down. I look around the makeshift room and notice the amount of items and pictures she's surrounded by in order to personalize it. Pictures of her family, a few single shots of younger children, school pictures probably. It's homey in here. I like it._

"_I take it you're here because of your mother." She sits forward and I shift uncomfortably in my seat, "I'm only here to help you Brittany. I can't do that if you don't tell me what's going on."_

"_I just want information." I look up from staring into my lap, "I don't even know if it's the right thing to do."_

_She stares at me for a second before nodding and going into her drawers next to her. She pulls out a few sheets of paper and places them in front of her. "Usually I would just give these pamphlets to the kids that come to see me and they'll probably never come back. Usually those kids are attention starved and just want someone to listen to," Her hands roam over the sheets of paper again, "But I know you. And I know that this is different. So I'm gonna try something different. Is that okay with you?"_

"_I don't really understand, but okay." I nod and she folds the papers up before putting them in a different folder._

"_What I'm saying is that I don't want you to be like those other kids. Before I give you any information, before I become your social worker, I want to know your reasons for wanting to do this." She looks at me expectantly and I duck my head. I didn't think it'd be this hard. I didn't plan on speaking with someone that I know personally._

"_Mrs.-" I try to talk but she interrupts me yet again._

"_Marie." She shakes her head as she corrects me, "If you're looking into emancipating yourself, you're going to need to start addressing me as an adult. So no more Mrs. this Mrs. that."_

_I stare at her for a few seconds to make sure she's actually serious. Is she serious?_

"_Understood?" She asks me and I nod slowly, "Great." She snaps her fingers, suddenly remembering something, "And definitely not 'Mistress', okay?" She smiles and I actually return the smile at that._

"_But I like saying 'Mistress'." I frown and she chuckles, "Ballet Mistress makes you sound cooler." I tell her and she nods._

"_Well I may have been your dance instructor when you were a little girl, but I'm not anymore. So calling me Mistress would be a little bit weird, don't you think?" She smiles again and I feel almost normal again._

_The feeling of normal being quickly replaced with the feeling of emptiness and the reminder of how very abnormal my life is right now. But then it gets me thinking that this is just a phase. One day my mom will wake up and she'll be different. Things will be back to the way they were. Maybe if I just gave it more time. Marie notices the slight pause I take and she frowns. I suddenly have the urge to walk out of this place._

"_I don't know if I should do this," I whisper and she moves from her seat behind her desk, sitting in the seat next to me, "What if this isn't the right thing to do?"_

_She rubs my back as the tears fall, "Just tell me what happened, Brittany. I want to help you. Just tell me what happened."_

_I break down right there in her cubicle. By the time I'm finally calm, I find that it's actually time for me to go back home. That wasn't the last I saw of her though. Week after week I'd come back and tell her everything. I'd talk to her about the passing of my father that was only a few months ago and the emptiness inside my mother. I tell her about the first day the verbal abuse started, and how it wasn't enough sometimes so it moved deeper, into physical abuse. Then finally how that's all it became. No words were exchanged in my household anymore. It turned into my own personal hell._

_The week after that I was met with her sad eyes as I realized that there was a police officer sitting across of her. I immediately felt the need to turn and run._

"_Brittany," Marie stands up and motions for me to follow her into another room. A bigger one, like for conferences or something, "This is Officer Williams," She nods her head in the direction to the officer. Officer Williams smiles at me and reaches her hand out towards mine. I take it, her dark skin contrasting against my pale skin. She lets go and tells me to call her Tasha._

"_Marie?" A young, tall, Caucasian man in a suit one size too big knocks on the door and walks inside, "Is this her?" He motions to me and I sink in my shoes, feeling intimidated._

_Marie slaps him on the shoulder and he winces, "That's no way to talk in front of a client," she scolds him and he apologizes softly, "Now address her correctly."_

_He nods and walks up to me. It actually isn't so bad standing in front of him. He is pretty tall though. But his face is friendly, kind of like mine._

"_Hello Ms. Pierce," He shakes my hand firmly, "My name is Eric Bailey." He tells me with what I would assume to be his signature smile. I can't help but think that he'd be the perfect older brother for me. Except with brown hair and grey eyes. "I'm your attorney."_

"_My what?" I stop shaking his hand and look at Marie, "Why do I need an attorney?"_

"_Maybe you should sit down sweetie," Tasha comes up to me and helps me into one of the chairs surrounding the oval table._

_The rest of the people in the room sit across of me. I look at each of them as they open their folders and look at a few sheets of papers together. Finally, Marie looks up and smiles at me, "Brittany, Tasha is a good friend of mine. I been talking to her over the course of the last few weeks and we both think we could build a strong case for you."_

"_Case?" I question her and all three of them nod._

"_Yep," Eric smiles, "You're only 15, Brittany, which means we can't really do anything thing yet."_

"_I'll be 16 in a couple of months," I remind them and they nod in understanding._

"_That's why we're going to try to get everything done in time," Tasha tells me, "So that when you turn 16, we can petition the court and be completely prepared."_

"_Petition? Court?" I didn't think it was going to be this complicated._

_Eric sits up and hands me a sheet of paper. I look it over as he begins to explain it to me, "Ohio law states that a minor can only legally emancipate oneself by either legal marriage or joining the military. Both of which will need parental or guardian consent."_

"_Seriously?" I read the words on the page and it's true. I'm stuck. There's no way I can escape my mother now._

"_However," Marie hands me another paper, "We believe that we can still get you out of there without having to do either of those things."_

_I already know what they're going to suggest._

"_I don't want to be in foster care." I shake my head and clench my jaw. Someone like me in foster care, I would never survive. I barely can survive being called names in high school, there's no way I can survive being called names by another parent who will neglect me just as much as my mother does._

_"We weren't going to suggest that. Don't worry," Tasha reaches out and grabs my hand, "I can help build the case by officially documenting the abuse from your mother. As long as we have it on paper it can help us. Marie called me specifically because she knows I'll get things done right. In case anything were to happen to you during the process, I'll be already filled in with what's happening. Think of me as your safety net."_

_I nod even though I'm still thinking about the foster care situation. "If I can't emancipate myself I'll just be placed in foster care." I speak out loud. I try to understand everything but it just keeps going back to me living with people I know nothing about. I really don't want to be looked at as just a paycheck._

_"There is a slight provision, a loophole," Eric slides another paper in front of me and I look at it. "If you can finish high school early and get your high school diploma, we can petition the court and they could rule that you are stable enough to live on your own."_

"_I have to graduate first!?" My eyes widen and I shake my head in defeat, "There's no way I can do that."_

"_We think we can pass with a GED." Marie stands up and waves to a man waiting outside, "And I know just the person who can help."_

* * *

The small tug on my shirt pulls me back to reality and I blink away the memories. I look down at my daughter strapped into her car seat and smile.

"What's wrong, Mommy?" She asks me as she squirms in her chair, waiting to be let out.

"Nothing, baby." I shake my head and go back to unbuckling her. How long had I been daydreaming?

I finally get her out of the car and we walk into the house together. Ryan and Devin are watching TV on the couch and Eric and Joel are cooking dinner. I greet everyone and only half of them even acknowledge the fact that I'm even there.

Even though the semester is over, we've still been spending our Sunday study sessions together, minus the studying. We usually make it into a movie/dinner night. Part of me thinks it's because they know I'm still heartbroken. I check my phone at the thought just in case but as always, she hasn't called. I haven't seen her since that night. The night she walked out of the bar. I didn't even get to talk to her. She didn't even hear me sing. She just left.

"Mommy?" the little girl below me grabs my hand and I crouch down to her level.

"Yes?"

"Do I have a daddy?" She kicks her feet across the floor cautiously and my heart stops, "Uncle Ryan says to ask _you_..." she whispers and I look toward the couch. Ryan and Devin are looking at me expectantly. I look towards the kitchen and see Joel and Eric urging me on to answer.

"Did you just ask Uncle Ryan because you weren't sure if it was okay to ask me?" I lean back and completely sit on the ground next to her. She nods and I take a deep breath.

"You want us to go?" Devin mouths from across the room and I nod at him. The boys get up and grab their things in understanding.

"Dinner's in the oven," Joel tells me as he passes by and gives a small high five to the little one beside me.

We both watch them leave until finally it's only the two of us. She sits down across of me in the same crossed legged fashion as I am and we stare at each other for a few seconds.

"I guess I should start from the beginning." I speak first and she nods. "You _do _have a daddy." I tell her and her eyes brighten as she smiles, "You also have another mommy." I tell her and her face scrunches up quickly.

"Another mommy?" She asks me, clearly confused and I take another breath to calm my nerves.

I nod and go into my purse, pulling out a picture from my wallet and handing it to her. She studies it for a minute until it finally registers. She knows. She knows now why she looks nothing like me. After seeing them in that picture, she's figured it out. She looks up at me and nod, letting her know that she is indeed right. She moves the picture around in her hand and then flips it over, moving her tiny fingers over the writing in the back. She can't read yet but she still knows. She can already recognize that combination of tiny scribbles by now.

"That's my name." She whispers and I fight back my tears.

"That's right, baby," I scoot closer to her and we look at the names together.

_Will Schuester and Emma Pillsbury, WMHS, 2010._

It was taken right before the wedding, before I even met them. They put this picture inside the envelope with the letter. The letter that I read every day.

"I named you after the both of them," I tell her and she looks at me, still trying to put it together.

"Emma Wildalynn Pierce." She recites her full name and I smile brightly at her. It fits her perfectly.

* * *

"_And I know just the person who can help." Marie smiles at me as I watch the man step into the conference room. "This is William Schuester. He's going to help you with getting your GED." Marie pats William on the back and he smiles brightly at me._

"_It's a pleasure to meet you, Brittany." He extends his hand and I take it slowly, "Call me Will." His smile getting brighter by the second. It's actually a little off putting at first. Or maybe that's because I'm starting to feel uncomfortable about this whole thing._

"_I know it may seem like things are going extremely fast," Eric speaks up and we all look at him, "But it's going to be a while before anything major happens. We're all here now just to make sure that this is what you really want to do."_

_I look around at all the people trying to help me. I shouldn't feel uncomfortable. It only feels that way because it's been so long since I've had so many people care for me like this before. "I do," I tell them, "This is what I want."_

"_Okay then," Will goes around me and sits at one of the open chairs, "We've got a lot of work ahead of us. What's the plan?" He asks Eric._

"_You just worry about getting her that GED," Eric flips through the paperwork in front of him, "We'll figure everything else out."_

"_Are you sure? There must be something else I can do," Will leans forward and looks at the scattered sheets of paper._

"_We're sure," Eric looks up at him and they exchange serious expressions. "Will, all of this rides on the fact that Brittany will get her GED. Without that, there's nothing we can do."_

* * *

_In the months leading up to my birthday, I worked tirelessly with Will. There was so much to do in so little time. It began to take its toll._

"_Brittany," Will rubs his temple, "You need to concentrate." He tells me and points at the problem laid out in front of me. I think I've been staring off into space again. For some reason, all the words and numbers and letters blend into a big pile of nothingness on sheets of paper after a certain amount of time. Or maybe that's just me._

"_I can't," I let out a heavy breath and sit back, "My mind always wanders when I think too much. I'm just so worried about everything else."_

_Will leans back and decides that it probably is time for a break. We've been working on the same problems for hours now. I'm pretty sure he doesn't like being held back in school, when he's here all day. I feel bad that I'm making him do this for me._

"_Will?" A tiny redheaded woman knocks on the door and we both turn to look at her, "I finished all the paperwork. All it needs now are the signatures." She continues as she walks in and hands him a stack of papers._

"_Thanks, Emma." He smiles at her and then turns to me, "Brittany, this is my wife, Emma. I've asked her to help us with the GED paperwork. The moment you turn 16 we're going to send these out to get all the required signatures so that you can take the exam."_

"_Hi," I smile at her and reach my hand out, "Nice to meet you." I pause to think about it, "Also thank you. I know you don't need to do this. I really am grateful."_

_She doesn't take my hand but instead pulls me into a hug. "You are so brave." She tells me and I surprise myself at how much those words affect me. I try to choke back a sob but she hears it and pulls back, studying my face carefully._

"_William," She speaks to him but her eyes stay purchased on mine, "Can you give us a second?"_

_Will looks between the two of us and smiles in understanding. He stands up and places a kiss on Emma's head before leaving the classroom. Emma doesn't move though, she just continues to watch my every move and I begin to shift uncomfortably under her gaze._

"_How are you coping, Brittany?" She sits down and I tilt my head in question._

"_Coping with what?"_

"_Everything," She tells me in all seriousness, "Your father's death, your mother's absence, everything." She clarifies._

"_Oh," I whisper, "I don't really know." I tell her honestly, "Should I be doing something different?" I ask her and she looks at me apologetically._

"_You aren't talking to anyone about all of this? What about Marie?"_

"_I don't want to bother her about it," I duck my head and fiddle with my fingertips, "She's already doing so much for me."_

_Emma stays silent for a couple of seconds before she speaks up again, "You can talk to me," She hands me a piece of paper with her name and number on it, "I'm the school counselor here. I'm here if you ever need to talk to someone. Promise."_

"_What about," I shake my head, trying to piece together the right words, "What about times when I don't know what to say? Like, when I can feel it inside me, my emotions, wanting to be let out, but there aren't any words that can release them." I tell her, hoping that she'll understand me. Sometimes people don't that's why. So instead they call me stupid or idiot._

_She thinks about it again for a while until she remembers something, "Will mentioned something to me the other night," She stands up and tells me to follow her. We walk further into the school until we're standing in front of the auditorium._

"_What are we doing here?" I ask her as I look around the empty hallways. She smiles brightly up at me and grabs my hand, pulling me with her as she opens the doors in front of us._

"_He told me you used to dance for Marie." She tugs on my arm and I walk in first. The large room is dark but I can still make out the contours of a stage at the very front._

_I begin my descent to the bottom of the auditorium slowly as I take in my surroundings. My school doesn't have one of these. It's huge. When I make it to the bottom I place my hands on the cold hard surface of the stage and smile, running my fingers lightly over it as I walk along the edge._

"_I'm not telling you what you should do," Emma begins to walk down the steps and I turn around to face her, "But I really think you should start dancing again. Do you think it would help?"_

_I shrug, "I don't know. Maybe? I haven't danced in such a long time," I laugh and turn back to the stage, "My mom made me stop taking lessons when it became too expensive."_

"_That doesn't mean you should stop," Emma reaches me and guides me to the steps, "If it's what you love, you should do it. Use it as a tool." She smiles at me._

_I follow her onto the stage and feel the floor beneath my feet, "Thank you," I whisper as I slip out of my shoes and let my feet touch the cold wood. The moment it hits it I close my eyes and an entire routine flashes in the back of my head. It's slow, but meaningful. It just needs the right music. I've never had that happen to me before._

"_I'll leave you to it then," I hear Emma step back and I'm left alone. I open my eyes and the choreography vanishes. It's a strange feeling. I can't seem to place it though. It's almost like relief but not quite. Maybe this is what I needed._

* * *

"Did you dance?" I place the little girl in her bed and tuck her in safely.

"Not exactly," I smile down at her and continue my usual nightly routine with her. Making sure her stuffed animals are safe alongside her and her nightlight is ready to keep her company the whole night through. When I finish I sit beside her and she looks expectantly at me. "If I finish the story, will you promise to wake up in time tomorrow?"

She nods quickly and sits back up, wanting to know more about my past.

"Well as you know, Will was my tutor. But he and Emma became more than that." I tell her as I watch her carefully. She seems to be taking the information in still. I'm not sure if it's processed yet.

* * *

_I sit at the dinner table with my new found family and smile at everyone around me. Through the past months I've become close with pretty much everyone that's helping me._

_Eric turned out to have emancipated himself when he was 16 too. He went straight to college after that. Working hard, he got his undergraduate degree in social services at age 19. His scores for getting into law school were so good that he got a full ride scholarship. He also worked interning at a few judges chambers and even a law office. He's crazy. He worked like crazy to study for the bar exam. But it paid off. He passed. I'm actually his first client. I probably should be a little worried that I have a 22 year old attorney but I'm not. He's incredible._

_Will and Emma met each other at McKinley. They say it was love at first sight. Honestly, they're the cutest couple I've ever met. They got married the year before and told me all the crazy stories with Emma's parents. We've all become so close that we ended up doing our tutoring sessions at either Eric's or Will and Emma's house. They became like second homes to me._

_Luckily for me, my mother barely even knew I was mostly gone. I would come home later and later every night just to test if she would even look my way. She didn't. Some nights I wouldn't even come home. I'd stay over at Eric's and just catch the bus to school the next morning._

"_Brittany!" Eric waves his hand in front of my face and I blink a few times to refocus. I turn to look at him and he laughs, "Can you pass the pepper?" He points to the other end of the table and I slowly reach for it._

"_Sorry," I apologize, "I was distracted for a bit."_

"_Are you doing okay, sweetie?" Emma sits up and looks at me._

"_Yea," I wave off the concerned pairs of eyes and pick up my fork, "I'm fine," I tell them, "I just zoned out. I'm okay."_

_That seems to put them at ease and we all continue eating our food. It isn't until mid-dinner that Will speaks up._

"_Brittany, you should think about stopping by Glee Club one day." Will smiles at me and we all look at him._

"_Glee Club?" I ask and he nods._

"_Oh!" Emma claps, "I think that would be a brilliant idea."_

"_What's a Glee Club?" I raise my eyebrows and Eric snorts on his water._

_Will and Emma both glare at Eric and they all exchange looks. I've got pretty used to that by now. But usually the only people that do it are bitchy cheerleaders in my school or bottom of the totem pole nerds. They usually don't say sorry afterwards though._

"_Sorry Britt," Eric jabs his elbow into my side and I cringe. Eric is different. He's like an older brother. I told him that once and he just laughed. Will and Emma have become like best friends to me. Always there for me, I never feel like a kid when I'm with them. Sure they're like ancient old compared to me but I don't mind. And they don't seem to mind either._

"_Just stop by one day. You don't even have to say or do anything. We're meeting in the auditorium tomorrow after school." Will explains to me, "Get a good seat though, we're practicing for regional's right now. Everyone's trying to come up with original songs."_

"_Oh my, you need to hear some of them," Emma laughs, "This one girl wrote a song about lips, Brittany. LIPS."_

"_I shot that one down of course," Will interrupts._

"_Yea," Emma rolls her eyes, "But then she convinced you that it would sound good in an auditorium type setting."_

"_Which it didn't," Will shakes his head, "I think I'm just scared of her really."_

"_Aren't we all?" Emma chuckles and we settle back into our family dinner._

* * *

"Did you go?" Emma looks up at me and I shake my head.

"I didn't," I tell her and shift so that she could rest her head on my lap, "Closest I got was standing outside the door. I was too afraid to go in. I could hear them singing and they seemed like such a family, I didn't want to mess it up. Plus I didn't even go to that school. It would've been weird."

"So what happened next?" She asks me as I play with her hair.

"Nothing really. Will didn't question me about it. Things went on like usual. I studied day after day, night after night to prepare myself for the big test." I tell her as I think back on the many nights spent with my new friends. Sometimes we'd abandon studying and just have fun. It was days like those that made me forget all my troubles. I think they knew that too. That's why we did them every once in a while.

* * *

_I began to only go to the auditorium on days that I knew Glee Club met somewhere else. I don't know why but I just didn't feel comfortable with the whole idea of surrounding myself with peers. I became scared. It usually ends badly for me. Plus I'm trying to emancipate myself. I shouldn't be getting involved with teenagers and school activities._

_I focused all of my attention on getting my GED. My birthday is tomorrow and I wouldn't consider myself at all ready. There was still so much to learn. I was stressing out more and more. What's worse is that the routine in my head had begun to slowly disappear._

_So now I'm here in the auditorium, trying so badly to hold onto the one thing that has been keeping me sane. I shut my eyes tighter and try to imagine it again and again. I don't want to forget it. Maybe if I just did it. Maybe I should just dance it out. It wouldn't be that hard. It's been replaying in my mind for so long I'm pretty sure I could just stand up now and-_

"_Hello?" Someone speaks up and I fall back down to my seated position. "Anyone here?" The voice speaks up again. No one is supposed to be here. I look around the empty room to find the intruder but I'm met with darkness as usual. I begin to hear footsteps coming from behind the stage and I quickly grab my bag and rush out the side door before they find me._

* * *

"I don't even know why I ran." I tilt my head back and look at the light pink colored ceiling. "My heart was beating so fast, it was the first thing that came to mind."

* * *

_I make it to bus stop just as my phone rings. "Hello?" I answer it as I'm catching my breath._

"_Britt!" Emma yells into the phone, "When did you leave? I tried to find you but I guess you left already."_

"_Yeah," I sit down on the bench, "I just got to the bus stop. I'm going home now."_

_I can hear Will in the background asking where I am and I think I can hear Eric too._

_"Oh,_ s_hoot," Emma exclaims, "Guys, we just missed her." Emma speaks away from the phone. "We wanted to be together when we send out the paperwork." Emma explains, "Stay where you are, Brittany. We're gonna come pick you up and we'll all head over to Marie's house."_

* * *

_Looking at everything that we've accomplished so far gives me more hope than I thought it would. All of these amazing people around me have played such big parts in my journey to becoming an adult. All the paperwork is laid out on the table for all of us to see._

_Everything we need; my workers permit, my emancipation. We've been building this for months now and it finally looks like progress. All we need now is to get the ball rolling forward. The moment we send these in, it will be._

"_Starting tomorrow," Marie smiles at me, "Everything is going to move along a lot faster. Are you ready for that?" She asks me and I nod as I look around. I feel like I've grown so much already. I'd think it's almost impossible for me to grow any further._

"_Workers permit should be the easiest to get." Eric points out, "We should focus on scheduling your GED test,"_

"_Which you'll pass with flying colors" Will high fives me and Emma giggles. I hold in my remark about colors not being able to fly because then I remind myself about rainbows. Duh._

"_Right," Eric nods, "After that we need to establish a steady income. Finding a job that will look good enough to the court will be our biggest priority. It needs to be stable. Once we have that we can start moving towards an actual court date. Marie and Tasha are in charge of figuring out the housing situation. Will and I are going to work with you," Eric turns to me and nods, "on finding the perfect job." He finishes and I nod back, "We have a few interviews lined up already but we need all the help we can get. They're okay jobs but that's all that we could manage so far. We need to look for something more appealing to a judge."_

_Emma raises her hand, "I can help too," She goes into her bag, "I sometimes help students find jobs. I think I have a few brochures actually."_

_I take my seat and look over the amount of scattered papers. Tomorrow will be the start of a new life. I just need to pass my GED test._

* * *

"Did you pass?" Emma sits on the kitchen counter as I finish making her breakfast. She fell asleep last night so I didn't get to finish my story. She gladly reminded me to finish it early this morning.

"Well," I point my spatula at her and she giggles, "As you know, Mommy isn't very book smart." I confess and she scowls.

"Who says?" She asks angrily and I chuckle.

"Nobody, baby." I kiss her on the head and turn back to the stove, "Learning didn't come easy for me, that's all." I shrug and flip one of my perfect pancakes, "But Will and Emma did an amazing job at helping me understand certain things. I knew how to do the work and I knew the answers. I just had a funny way of showing it."

"Like what?" She questions and I turn around to think of an example.

"For example," I poke my chin, "In high school, I've always said that the square root of 4 is rainbow." I nod and Emma tilts her head in confusion. I giggle as I turn off the stove and hop onto the counter next to her. "You'll learn it one day."

"So were you wrong?" She asks me and I look down at her.

"Yes and no," I tell her and she tilts her head again, "See the rest of the world would see the answer as a number. But in my head I saw it as a rainbow."

"Why?" She scrunches her forehead and I shake my head.

"I have no idea. It's just the way my mind works. I never understood it. But Will and Emma helped me figure it out. After lots of explanation, they finally understood my way of thinking. Apparently I just have to think about the weirdest answer and use that one. So when someone asks me, 'What's the square root of 4?' I answer '2'. It's weird huh?" I scrunch my nose up and she does the same.

I think I've confused her even more

"The point is," I jump down and go back to the stove, "I passed my GED exam." I do a little tap dance move and smile widely at her as she squeals.

* * *

"_Just open it already!" Eric yells and I snap the envelope away from him. I keep telling myself that it's not that big of a deal. If I don't pass then I'll just study harder and try again._

_I open the envelope and pull out the folded sheet of paper inside. Will and Emma lean forward and Eric moves to stand behind me. I open the paper and read the tiny words and numbers that tell me my score._

"_I passed!" I scream and my arms shoot straight into the air. "I did it! WE did it!" We jump around the tiny living room together and celebrate our victory. I can't believe I passed. It's incredible._

"_You opened it without us!?" Marie and Tasha exclaim as they step into Will and Emma's apartment._

"_Oh my god, you passed!" Tasha drops her bag and runs up to me, encompassing me in a death hug, "I'm so proud of you!"_

_After we all settle down we begin to prepare our celebratory dinner together. It was combination of all of our efforts that brought us here. The fact that I actually got my GED, my workers permit, my driver's license, it's all thanks to them._

"_I'd like to make a toast," Eric pours glasses of sparkling cider for everyone and Tasha helps him pass them out. "I'd never thought that my first case as an attorney would result in such a close knit family like this one. I truly am glad that I was brought into this to help."_

"_We haven't even gone to court yet!" Marie laughs from across the kitchen._

"_We'll be going sooner than you think," Eric winks and the rest of us look as confused as the next person._

_We seem to be all thinking the same thing, "She needs to get a job still," Will states the obvious._

_Eric smiles and moves to stand next to me, "I've called in a few favors," He tells me and puts his arm around my shoulders, "I have buddy that I went to law school with that needs a secretary. I told him you'd be perfect for the job, Britt. You have an interview next week."_

"_What!" I turn towards him and he laughs, "Are you serious?" He nods and I jump up and down again._

"_After you land this job we'll send in the papers to set an official date for your hearing. Marie," He raises his glass up to her and smiles, "Would you like to do the honors in telling her the other good news?"_

_She rolls her eyes at his dorkiness and comes next to me. She holds my shoulders and my knees already feel like jelly, "We found you a place, Britt." She tells me and the next thing I know I'm seeing darkness._

_I've fainted._

* * *

"_It's cheap, in an okay neighborhood, and close to her work." Eric stands tall before of the judge. We've been in this courtroom for nearly an hour now, trying to persuade the judge in favor of emancipating me._

"_It says here she works for an attorney?" The judge looks through his reading glasses as he flips through the stack of papers in front of him, "It seems like all the paperwork is in order. You've done your homework, Mr. Bailey."_

"_Not only me, your Honor." Eric motions to me next to him and the others behind us, "We all did. Brittany Pierce is fully capable of living on her own. She is able to support herself, live on her own, and can manage her own affairs."_

"_Hmm." The judge nods at studies my face for a while, "Your GED exam scores are remarkable, Brittany." He looks at another sheet of paper, "To go from nearly the bottom of your class to attaining an above average score on the GED exam, how do you explain that?" He asks me and I look up at Eric who just nods._

_I stand to my feet and clear my throat, "I think I just need the right teachers, your Honor."_

"_Oh?" He takes off his glasses and stares at me, "Is there something wrong with the educational system?"_

"_No, no." I shake my head and think about my answer again, "I'm just saying that for me, working with an amazing teacher one on one helped more than sitting in classroom filled with peers who constantly teased me."_

_The judge seems to think about it for a few more seconds before he speaks again, putting his reading glasses back on and go back to another paper, "Ms. Pierce, I'm sure you have been notified of the conditions for emancipating oneself?"_

"_Yes, your Honor." I nod sternly as he glances back up at me, "Marriage or military."_

"_It seems like Mr. Bailey have found a way around that, so to speak." He looks away and turns a few more pages, "What's to stop me from coming to the conclusion that you should just be placed with social services? You have more than enough reason, considering your current living circumstances, to be placed in a foster home."_

_I turn my head slightly to glance at my mother. The day I told her that I wanted to do this she just stared blankly at me and told me to pack my bags. It was heartbreaking. Somewhere deep inside me I wanted her to fight. To fight for me to stay with her._

"_Forgive me, your Honor." I stand taller and hold my ground, "But the foster care system is broken."_

"_Is it now?" He takes his glasses off again and leans forward to listen, "How so?"_

"_Don't get me wrong, I believe it's important to have it. There are children out there that deserve better homes. Better places than the ones they have now. But there are also people out there that feed off of that... vulnerability. They take in these children for a paycheck and that's all. Those parents aren't any better than the parents those kids were taken away from."_

"_So what makes you different? What makes you special enough to skip parents altogether?"_

"_Nothing, your Honor." I shake my head, "But I have all of this support from my friends. They helped me start my own life. A life that I am in charge of. If I fail, it's on me. I understand that completely. Why would you send a capable young girl, into a home that maybe some other kid actually needs?"_

"_Your Honor, if I may?" Eric speaks up and the judge nods at him to continue, "Brittany is a bright individual. She has overcome so much in her life already. To deny her this would be a mistake. It's the right thing for her right now. I promise you, she will not stop at one attempt."_

_The judge leans back and looks at the others behind us. I'm too afraid to move in case it'll sway his decision in any way. Eric stands his ground and I do too._

"_Mrs. Pierce?" He looks towards the back at my mother and my heart starts beating faster. "Do you have anything to add? I noticed you've already signed your consent." I don't turn around. I don't dare look at what she does. I wish I could shut my ears off as well to prevent myself from hearing anything she has to say. But she doesn't say anything. Nothing at all. "Very well," The judge nods and closes the portfolio of papers, "Brittany Susan Pierce, I've come to the conclusion that you are hereby on your own."_

_It's as if the entire courtroom let out one large breath. We did it. We won._

"_Meaning," The judge continues and I bring my attention fully onto him again, "Your mother no longer has a duty to support you, you will be treated as an adult under criminal laws, and you will have the right to contract, sue, and be sued." He finishes and I give him the biggest smile I could manage. "Let's get this straight though," He looks pointedly at me and my smile is thrown out the window, "Emancipation does not give you the right to drink alcohol, vote, or marry. Laws that require age restrictions still apply."_

"_Yes, your Honor." I nod, throwing my smile back on. "Thank you so much."_

* * *

"So you had no mommy?" Emma squeezes my hand as we walk across the street together. When we make it to the other side I lift her up and place her into one of the many grocery shopping carts.

"I had a mommy. But after that day, I did my own thing, and she did hers. She wasn't a part of my life anymore after that." I frown deeply at her and she pokes my cheek like usual to make it disappear. I smile as I let go of the frown and give her a quick kiss on the cheek before heading into the supermarket.

"What about _my_ mommy?" Emma tilts her head and I almost stop in my tracks while simultaneously almost running over a workers foot. I never thought hearing her say 'mommy' while about another person besides me would make me choke. "Not you, Mommy. The other one. The real one." She continues and I fight back my tears. What's happening?

"Emma!" The voice of another woman closes in on us and I breathe out in relief. It's Sugar. "Brittany?" She turns my body and studies my face, "What's wrong, babe?"

I try my hardest to hold them back but they fall anyway, "Sorry," I look away so that my daughter doesn't see me crying. I duck my head and Sugar follows suit.

"Oh my God, Brittany." Sugar's face pulls into concern, "What happened?"

I blink back a few tears and shake my head, "C-can you watch her for a second? I-I have to go to the bathroom." I tell her as best I can as I rush away.

* * *

I hear the door to the bathroom open and close and I wipe my face with my sleeve. I shouldn't be reacting like this. I know she didn't mean it like that. She knows that no matter what I'll always be her mom.

"I'm sorry, Mommy." Emma knocks on the bathroom stall door and I lean forward to unlock it. The little redhead opens the door slowly and I can see that she had been crying too. I glance up and see Sugar smiling down at the both of us. She nods at me and I'm so grateful that she ran into us. I don't know what would've happened if I just started breaking down in the middle of the 'Pasta and Sauces' aisle.

"She told me what happened," Sugar whispers to me as I make my way out of the bathroom stall.

"I didn't mean to make you sad," Emma steps forward and wraps her tiny arms around my legs. I look down at her and she looks up at me, "I'm just confused..." She ducks her head.

"I'll explain everything to you, okay? It's just a little hard for me." I try to tell her and I look back at Sugar. I haven't seen her in so long.

Sugar seems to understand my thoughts though, "How are you?" She mouths and I nod back, telling her that I'm okay. But she sees through it, "Really?"

I chuckle at that. I shake my head softly and close my eyes, "Of course not." I mumble and new tears fall. What is going on with me today? It's like my whole being is unraveling and there's nothing I can do to stop it.

Sugar steps forward and holds me in a loose embrace, "Shh," She whispers, "It's okay, I've called Eric and Devin already. They're on their way to take you home." She holds me tighter. "Try not to break down in public again, okay?" She jokes and I let out another chuckle.

As soon as I'm ready we all make our way outside the supermarket. Emma, keeping a tight hold on my hand, keeps looking up at me to make sure that I'm okay. Every time I catch her looking I put on the biggest smile that I can manage. Pretty soon the sounds of Devin's truck can be heard from down the street. Emma recognizes it first and she jumps to her feet to look around. When she spots the dark truck she can barely contain herself.

"Uncle Devin! Uncle Eric!" She screams when they jump down from their seats. Devin and Eric smile as they both walk towards us. When they get close enough Emma turns around towards me slowly, asking my permission silently. I nod with a smile and she bolts straight to Devin, who picks her up quickly and the sounds of her squealing fill the parking lot.

"I could've drove home," I tell Eric when he reaches me and eyes my face.

"Uh huh," He mutters, unconvinced, "That's not what the macaroni and linguine told me." He smiles softly and I roll my eyes. "We are fully prepared to spend the night at your place. If you need reinforcements. You don't have to do this alone."

I think about it for a moment as I watch Devin and Emma play nearby. I nod slowly, there's no way I can finish this story by myself.

* * *

"So you and Devin?" I ask Eric as we pull out of the parking lot. Eric glances to the back of my car and makes sure Emma is fully occupied with something else, "She fine, she's watching her cartoons." I reassure him, "Now spit it out. What's going on?"

"There's nothing to tell," He sighs, "He's with Joel. He knows I like him but he's still with Joel. That alone pretty much says it all."

"You know it's not that easy." I tell him pointedly and he rolls his eyes.

"What about Santana?" He questions back and I sigh in return as I sit back in my seat.

"Again, it's not that easy."

"Just give her time. It'll work out." He tells me and I turn to look at him.

"You too," I tell him honestly, "Just give Devin time."

* * *

Eric turns into my driveway and I thank him for driving us home. They really didn't need to go out of their way for me but they did. Devin pulls up behind us seconds after and we all make our way inside the house. I walk Emma straight to my bedroom and get her ready for bed. I go back into the living room and find Devin and Eric already making themselves at home.

"You gonna be okay in there, B?" Devin asks me as he reaches for the remote control for the television. Neither of the two even looking back at me.

"Let us know if you need anything." Eric tells me as he goes into the movie cabinet to pick out something. I roll my eyes at the two. If it were anyone else, I'd feel used for my house and awesome snacks. But I unfortunately know them and I know full well that Eric's house is loaded with everything anyone ever needs.

I make myself a glass of water and go back into my bedroom. My daughter looks up at me from inside the bed sheets and I laugh at the way she burrowed her way into the most comfortable looking position.

"Are you gonna finish the story now?" She tells me as I lift up the sheet to slide in next to her in a seated position. I rest my back against the headboard and Emma rests her head on my lap.

"Mhmm," I tell her and hold her close to me, playing with the long strands of red hair, "Your real mommy and daddy-"

"You _are_ my real mommy." She frowns, "I'm sorry I said you're not."

I smile down at her and she glances up to smile back.

"You're mommy and I can both be your mommies." I tell her as I watch her try to process that information quietly in her brain, "But if you keep interrupting me, you'll never hear the rest." I smirk at her and she squeezes her lips shut to let me continue.

Just as I'm about to continue with the story I see her slowly raise her hand to the air. I look down at the adorable sight and giggle, "Yes?" I ask her.

"I don't get it." She frowns and I quirk my head in return.

"Get what?"

"If you had the big belly," Emma pokes my stomach, "How is _she_ my mommy too?" She eyes the picture in her hands. I sit back and try to think of the best way to describe it.

"When I turned 18," I begin and she perks up to listen, "Your mommy and daddy really wanted to have a baby, but they couldn't. When I found out that they couldn't have the one thing that I knew they wanted more than anything in the world, I became sad."

"Why?" She questions and we look at the picture together.

"Your mommy and daddy were my best friends. I wanted them to be happy. But they couldn't be happy until they had you." I tap her nose and she giggles. "I offered to help them. We went to the doctor, and they took a little bit from your mommy and a bit from your daddy and put it together inside of here," I hold her hand over my stomach.

"So I could grow?" She looks up at me and I nod.

"You are the perfect little combination of Will," I point to the curly haired man in the picture, "and Emma," I point to the redheaded woman next to him. "They were so excited. They were finally happy knowing that you were on your way to them."

I hadn't realized its gone silent. We both must be taking it in. I look over to Emma and find confusion mixed with sadness on her face. "What's wrong, sweetie?" I run my hand through her hair and she shakes her head.

"Why didn't they keep me?" She sniffles, "What did I do?"

I take a deep breath and close my eyes as I prepare myself. This is the hard part.

* * *

_I place the many brochures on Emma's desk and smile. All I have to do now is wait till she sees them. It isn't until later that day that she calls me and asks me if I had anything to do with them._

"_I figured it'd be good for you and Will. You never know, once the baby comes you won't have any time for yourselves. I know the Glee Club already won nationals and all and that was pretty much a getaway from Lima, but that was for a competition. You should go on a real getaway. I'm serious."_

"_Brittany, all these places seems nice and all, but they're too far. I mean, Hawaii? We can't leave to go all the way to Hawaii, Britt." She sighs into the phone and I can hear her flipping through the other brochures I've set down for her. "But I showed them to Will and-"_

"_Well, what about a road trip?" I quickly suggest as I turn on my computer and begin my search for great last minute vacations that are in road trip range. "How about New York?" I ask her as I click on a promising site, "Will always talks about Broadway and stuff. I'm sure he'd enjoy it."_

"_Britt-"_

"_No, you're right. New York is too dirty. I don't think you'd enjoy it. Unless," I think about it, "We could wrap you in a protective bubble like in bubble boy!"_

"_Britt-"_

"_I understand. It would bring too much attention. Plus it's like a 9/10-hour drive. There's no way you could survive that. Rest stop would be a must and I'm pretty sure the diners on the way won't meet your standards." I think about it more and finally it comes to me, "What about just right out of town? You can stay in Ohio, but at least get out of Lima. You could find a cute bed and breakfast somewhere and just spend the night? Or maybe find a hotel and spend the week?"_

"_Brittany!" Emma suddenly yells into the phone and stops my rant, "I love you like a little sister, Brittany. But please just shut up."_

"_Rude," I joke and she laughs._

"_I've already talked to William about it." She tells me, "He thinks it's a great idea. Of course we wouldn't be going all the way to Hawaii. We can't take off that long from school."_

"_Why not? Have a little fun! Play hooky, I've been doing it since 16," I chuckle and I can almost see her rolling her eyes at my lame joke._

"_Well, I think a nice little road trip out of town is perfect for us." She tells me and I smile widely at myself, "Thank you Brittany. You're a genius."_

* * *

_I walk out of the Schuester residence and rub my belly. Their baby inside me has grown a lot in the past couple of months. Seriously, it's crazy._

"_Are you sure you're going to be okay? You'll call us if anything happens right?" Emma holds my shoulders as Will is placing the last of her bags in the car for their trip._

"_I'll be fine," I wave her off, "I'll call you if it's serious. You guys on the other hand need to let loose. Stop being so serious all the time. And don't you dare call me. For anything. Just have fun." I point at them and they step in for a last hug before hitting the road._

"_Maybe we shouldn't go," Emma picks at her fingers and eyes the road ahead, "We can go another time. What if something happens with the baby, Will?"_

"_Emma," I step in and interject, "Listen to me very carefully. The baby will be fine. I will be fine. You and Will are going to be fine. You're only going right out of town. You'll be 1 or 2 hours away at the most._

_Emma seems to think it over again before finally nodding slowly and giving my one last hug before getting into the car._

"_Thanks," Will pats my shoulder and I smile back at him._

"_You can thank me in two months, when you're pulling out your hair from stress and absolutely no sleep." I tell him and we share a laugh._

"_You'll be the babysitter," He laughs, "Don't think you're getting off that easy."_

"_Easy? Pushing out a baby is easy? Plus the only babysitting I'm gonna be doing is when she's grown. Diapers and baby food are not my thing." I hand him the keys to the car, "Now get out of here. Go have fun."_

* * *

I pause the story briefly to catch my breath before I reveal the worst part.

"You okay in here?" Devin knocks on my bedroom door as he and Eric peek in. Of course they were listening to the story outside the door.

"Don't interrupt!" Emma shushes them and Eric looks at me. He knows what's coming up. They look at each other and nod, sitting down at the threshold to wait.

* * *

"_Tonight at 10, more on the deadly crash that resulted in the two casualties of William McKinley High School's very own, William Schuester and Emma Pillsbury."_

_Someone needs to turn off that damn TV. It's been playing over and over again. Day after day, night after night, I can't seem to escape it. Sitting here in this hospital just makes things worse. I remember coming here on that night, the night it happened. I remember rushing in, asking anyone and everyone on the status of Will and Emma. I was alone. The night I was watching the news when they covered it. They didn't even have to say who it was. I knew it was them. I just knew._

"_Brittany S. Pierce?" A nurse steps forward with a small clipboard and I stand slowly, trying to not aggravate the baby. I've already done enough by putting her parents in the ground._

* * *

"What?" Emma whispers and clutches the picture in her hands, tears clearly trying to breach her eyes.

"I can stop, sweetie." I tell her softly as I rub her back, "I don't have to finish the story tonight."

She shakes her head and I glance at Eric who just nods. He's right, I can't stop it there. I need to tell her the happy ending.

* * *

"_Are you going to open it?" Eric nudges me softly and I let a few tears fall before looking back at him. I loosely fidget with the small envelope in my hands as I debate whether or not to open it now. It's been about a month since the accident._

_I'm due soon. I'll give birth to their baby girl and they should've known. They should've known to be here for that. GOD should've known they need to be here for that. What kind of God gives them everything they've ever wanted and then takes THEM away from it. Who does that?_

"_They didn't tell you what it's for?" He questions further and I shake my head._

_I open the envelope slowly and I can feel Eric eyes burning into me, waiting for me to tell him what it says. I read over the handwritten letter carefully as I try to hold myself together. It's not a massive letter. It's pretty short. It's sweet. It's... me. They're giving their baby to me._

_"They're leaving me with everything."_

_"What?" I drop my hands and Eric reaches down to grab the paper. He proceeds to read it and I try my hardest not to cry, "Holy shit," He mumbles as he reads._

_"I know." I tell him and I sit down slowly._

_"Holy shit." Eric repeats and sits down next to me, his eyes still glued to the paper in his hands._

_"I know." I shake my head as I try to remember how to breathe._

_"Brittany," He turns to me wide eyed, "You're gonna be a mom."_

_I turn my head to look at him and I don't think I've ever looked so scared in my life, "I'm gonna be a mom in a month."_

* * *

It's quiet.

I glance at Emma as she takes it all in. I glance at Eric and Devin, both looking at me proudly. They're happy I had the strength to do it. They knew it had to be done. I nod back at them when I hear their silent question and they both stand back up and leave the room.

"Emma?" I take hold of the little girl, "I love you _so_ much. The best thing that came out of all of this is that I got you. You understand me?" She looks up at me and I wipe a few stray tears from her tiny cheeks. The sounds of her sniffles fill the room and it takes a while but they eventually die down until she's asleep.

I stay awake for another couple hours. Just listening to the sounds of the movie being played in my living room. The thing about being friends with all gay men is that you're DVD selection ends up looking like something that came out of a throw up of rainbows.

After a while my mind begins to wander onto a certain brunette. I try to steer away but as hard as I try it proves to be difficult. How different would this be with Santana next to me? I've thought about this moment with my daughter many times but I've never thought that I'd want to share this moment with anyone. And then Santana happened and flipped my world upside down.

I love her. I have to get her back. I need her here with me.

I turn to my side and reach for my phone slowly to not disturb the sleeping child in my lap. I search for Santana's name and hold the phone up to my ear. She doesn't answer. I try again the next few days but the same happens. Maybe it's for the best. So eventually I stop calling. Days turn into weeks. Weeks into months. Months into a year.

For a year, nothing happens.


	18. July 2015

**AN: Best comment I got for last chapter: "**MFSOBWTBSSMMPASFBSAC" **hahha :P I honestly was not expecting that kind of response for last chapter. I really didn't think a year was that long o.o**

**Time jump one year...**

**Santana POV**

* * *

Chapter 18: July 2015

"Mami!" I shout into the house from the front door, "Hurry up, taxi's here!" That bitch needs to hurry up or we'll miss our flight.

"Hold on!" She yells back and I roll my eyes as I try to patiently wait. "Have you seen my luggage?" She pops her head into the hallway to ask me and my mouth drops open.

"Are you serious?" I stalk over to her and she quickly steps away from me. "How did you manage to lose your damn luggage?" I ask her, completely dumbfounded.

She holds her arms up in defense and side steps away from me, "I'll go find it," She mutters, "It's probably in the bathroom."

I don't even question it. I just want to get out of here. "I am not missing this flight, Motta. We're already gonna be late by the time we land." I tell her as I go back to the front door. I grab my bags from the hallway and walk up to the taxi, handing my luggage to the driver so that he can put them in the trunk.

Moments later I see Sugar busting through the front door with her leopard print outfit and matching luggage, "Found them! They were in the kitchen." She laughs and rushes over to us. She quickly hands the man her luggage and I wait for her to get into the cab.

"About time," I mumble under my breath as she shimmies her way to the other side of the car. I step in after her and place my purse on my lap, making sure to check it for everything that I need. Sugar does the same.

"Ready?" The driver gets into the driver's seat and glances back at us. I nod and he starts the engine, "Alrighty then, to the airport!" He chuckles to himself and Sugar giggles. Oh God, I'm going to hate this car ride aren't I?

* * *

"No way!" Sugar screams into the small confines of the cab and I cringe. I really wish I spent more money on better headphones. That way 'noise-canceling' would actually mean 'Sugar-canceling'. I lean back and close my eyes as I turn the volume up a bit to drown her out. I keep repeating the same mantra over and over in my head to calm me down. It's just something I've come accustomed to during high school. _I can do this. I do not feel the need to attack._

"Santana!" Sugar nudges me and I squeeze my eyes tighter, _I can do this. I do not feel the need to attack. _"Santana!" Sugar lifts up the side of my headphone and screams into my ear.

I _can't_ do this. I _need_ to attack.

I open my eyes and burn holes into Sugars eyes as I glare at her. I can see the level of intensity being reflected back at me through her eyes and I inwardly smirk. Her eyes widen as she slowly lifts her hand and points behind me, "W-we're here." She mumbles as I watch her eyes shift between mine, "A-airport."

"Oh," I deflate and drop the act as I open the door beside me, "Alright, let's go then." I nonchalantly step out of the car and walk to the back by the trunk. I wait for the driver to place our bags on the curb before handing him a generous tip.

"You really do scare me sometimes," Sugar frowns beside me and I shrug like it's nothing.

"Yeah, that's a thing I do."

* * *

_Why won't this stupid thing go in?_

I try shoving it one more time but it doesn't budge. I swear if the reason my carry on luggage doesn't fit in my overhead compartment is because I offered to pack some of Sugar's shoes in there I'm going to scream. No more nice deeds from Santana Lopez. Never again. I affirm my reasoning with shaking my head as I try to push it one more time.

"Hey," I hear a woman's voice next to me and I stop what I'm doing.

I turn to her and become taken back. This girl is gorgeous. "H-hi?" I stutter and cringe at my lack of play.

"You need help?" She giggles and thats when I realize she's a fucking flight attendant. I step back and let her try. Sugar kicks me from her seat and I look at her. She's laughing at me of course. And of course she glances up at the woman trying to push my luggage into the compartment above her.

"NO." I mouth to Sugar but her mischievous grin grows bigger. I shake my head and she nods. I mouth 'NO' again and she mouths 'YES'.

"Almost there," The flight attendant glance at me and flashes me a cute smile.

"BIG RACK!" Sugar mouths to me after looking up at the woman again. She emphasizes her words by hold her own breasts up and I try not to vomit at the sight of Sugar being grabby with herself. She glances up again and I look away. I am not going to be a part of this anymore. After another minute, my bag is finally tucked away. I thank the woman and go to my seat.

"She was hot, huh?" Sugar laughs next to me and I lean back in my seat.

This is going to be a long fourteen hours. At least we're stopping by Seattle and Minneapolis. I have two chances to run.

* * *

The flight attendant from before keeps checking on us. If I knew better I'd say she's hitting on me. Sugar keeps tapping her foot every time the woman, whose name has been revealed as Juliet, comes around. It's gotten pretty annoying at this point. The tapping, not the attendant.

"You think you could stop doing that?" I snap at Sugar and she stops her tapping.

"I can't," she begins to tap again, "It's annoying."

"You think?" I scoff at her and she rolls her eyes.

"Not me," She glances around, "_Juliet."_ She mocks her name.

My eyes widen and I look around to make sure Juliet wasn't nearby, "You're the one that started it. BIG RACK, remember?" This time I'm the one that emphasizes with grabbing my own breasts.

"Did you need something?" Juliet pops out of nowhere and I nearly have a heart attack. She giggles again and points to my elbow. The same elbow that is pressing the attendant button as we speak. I quickly move it off and apologize before sending her away.

I catch Sugar rolling her eyes and I pinch her arm.

"Ow!" She almost yells and I smirk. "What'd you do that for?!"

"That's for acting like a child. I can flirt with whoever I want."

"Don't you mean, _try_ to flirt? You're acting like a fumbling teenager." She bites back and I pinch her again.

She slaps my hand away and I chuckle softly. "Well can you blame me? I just haven't felt the need to date anyone yet. It's about time I get to flirting again."

"Because of-"

"Don't, Sugar." I cut her off, knowing who she was about to bring up, "I don't want to talk about that."

"It's been a year, San." She softens, "We gotta talk about it sometime."

I huff and cross my arms over my chest, "I did not pay $1200 to sit on an airplane and be counseled. Can we just drop it, please?"

She pauses and waits until I look at her again, "You can't keep ignoring it. It happened." She tells me and I roll my eyes.

"Yeah it happened. It happened in the past. It's time to move on." I make a little shoving motion with my hands to demonstrate.

"Is that what this is? Moving on?" She questions as she turns toward me, "You can't just _forget_ everything that happened and move on. It's not healthy. I'm tired of seeing you either angry or mopey. You need to actually move on or go back and talk to her. You at least owe yourself closure."

"What do you want me to say, Sugar?" I turn away and look out the window, "That I'm not over it? That it still hurts? Of course I'm not over it. Yes, it hurts. Badly. You think I haven't thought of her? I want so badly to move on but I can't. Every day for the past year I've thought of her."

"You need to talk to me, Santana." She sighs and places a hand on mine, "I'm here for you."

"You're the very one that broke my trust." I shake my head as I begin to pull my hand away, "You were supposed to be my best friend." I look at her and she snaps her hand away anyway.

"You know what?" She spits, "Get off your high fucking horse, would you? We aren't children anymore, Santana. Stop acting like one."

"Sugar," I purse my eyes in warning, "You better watch what you say."

"No." She shakes her head, "I won't _watch what I say_. Because as your best friend you need to hear the _straight up truth_," She mocks my voice. "You know, the kind of thing you never fail to give? Santana, I know you struggle with who you trust. I know you do. But what you had with Brittany wasn't some childish relationship where she cheated on you and lied to you."

"She _did_ lie."

"She didn't." Sugar points her finger at me, "As much as you want to believe it, you know she didn't. She was protecting Emma."

"So what's your excuse?" I wave her finger away, "Brittany doesn't know so much about my trust issues like you do. You hurt me too." I tell her and she shakes her head again.

"You know what you need to stop doing? Stop blaming other people. To a certain extent, you _are _right. I hurt you, Britt hurt you, Devin hurt you. You need to learn to see past all of that and look at what you have. _I'm_ _sorry_. I've been paying for what I did to you for the past year. But you need to understand that we meant well. Can't you see that? You push everyone away the moment something bad happens. I hate you sometimes for the very fact that I have to fight _you _to be _your _friend." She huffs and turns away from me.

I watch as Sugar struggles with her thoughts as she looks down the aisle to avoid eye contact with me. I think she's trying to calm down. Do I really make her _this_ frustrated? I know I'm tough to be around but that's why I have best friends. People who will stand by me no matter what I do, right? When it becomes too quiet I sigh loudly and she turns toward me expectantly.

"Sometimes-" I begin and she sits up to listen, "Sometimes I feel like I hate her for not trying harder. She _knows _how stubborn I am." I duck my head, "She knows me so why didn't she fight?"

"Are you serious?" Sugar grabs hold of my arm to urge me to look at her, "Listen to me, Santana. Being stubborn is one thing, but what you're being is being downright CHILDISH. _You_ walked out on her. She wanted to explain. She was going to. _You're_ the one that didn't fight. You didn't even give her a chance. You just gave up. Don't blame her for losing faith in something that you already killed."

I look away and it goes silent again.

"Have you seen her recently?" I mumble and glance at Sugar. She shakes her head. Sugar got a different babysitting job after everything went down last year. She says it's because she didn't want to make things uncomfortable but I know it's because she didn't want to hurt me.

"What about you?" She gives a light squeeze to my arm and I look at her questioningly, "I know you started hanging out with Devin again. I don't get it. How is it that you can be civil with Devin and I now but still not reach out to Brittany?" She asks me, clearly confused.

I think about it for a while, "I don't know." _Because I'm not ready. _"Maybe I really am over it." _No I'm not. _"She's the one that asked you two to lie to me." _I'm afraid I'll fall for her again and I don't think I can handle that._

Sugar studies my face and then finally shakes her head, "Also, you turn right whenever you leave the house." She explains knowingly, "Fastest way to the freeway is left. Turn right and it takes you right past the bus stop."

I drop my head and chuckle. Of course she caught on to that. I look back at her and nod. "I see her every once in awhile. "

"Have you ever thought that you're maybe torturing her with that?" She pulls her face into a sympathetic frown, "She has to deal with seeing you drive right past her."

I don't say anything to that. I just look away and out the window. I haven't thought about it like that.

* * *

I glance over to Sugar sitting beside me and roll my eyes with a chuckle. The plane took off from Seattle thirty minutes ago, there's really no need for her to be clutching the armrest like that. Sure, takeoff was rough but we're fine now. "Shug," I nudge her but she doesn't move, "SUGAR. MOTTA." I speak directly to her and she slowly moves her head to look at me, "It's okay, Motta, just relax."

I watch as her face contorts into more fear when she glances behind me and out the airplane window. "I'm too cute to die this young." She mumbles and shuts her eyes tightly.

"Mami," I place my hand on hers and she opens her eyes, "It's fine,"

She stares at me for a long second and I smile genuinely at her. Her face softens, "You called me Mami..."

I turn away with a shrug, "Yeah well, I could never really get rid of you. I might as well accept that you're my best friend." I laugh before grabbing my carry on bag under the seat infront of me and taking out my book.

I don't miss the small smile that Sugar is giving me. But being me, I ignore it. I can't have it get out that I had a heart to heart with Sugar Motta on an airplane. It's really not my fault. I'm stuck sitting next to her.

* * *

Almost home. Three planes, two cities, fourteen hours and we're only now just coming up to Dayton, Ohio. Thirty more minutes and we're landing. Just an hour car ride after that and I'm back in Lima.

"You think anyone is meeting us?" Sugar yawns as she stretches out her legs in the aisle beside her. I close my book and stretch my arms above me. I glance out the airplane window and sigh.

"Probably not." I tell her, "We're the last ones to get there. They're probably getting reacquainted with one another right about now." I press the attendant button on my armrest and wait for the flight attendant to show up beside Sugar.

"Hey," The perky blonde bounces a little too happily, "What can I get you?"

"OH MY GOD, really?" Sugar rolls her eyes at the girl, "Was that wink really _that_ necessary?" She turns to me expectantly and I shake my head at her. "What?" She whispers lowly, "The girl has obviously been hitting on you since we've boarded the damn plane." She scoffs and folds her arms over her chest. "This shit is seriously getting old."

I choose to ignore her and instead look up to the flight attendant, "Can I get some water real quick before we land?" I ask her and she leaves to grab some. I turn to Sugar, "Really?"

"What do you mean _'really'_? YOU REALLY!" She throws her arms up in defeat. "Every plane, Santana. You've managed to get hit on by a flight attendant on all three planes."

"Just ignore it." I shrug.

"That chick on the last plane didn't ignore it! Even when I told her that you were my wife she _still_ hit on you! Unclassy daughters of bastards. Making me look stupid." Sugar huffs and I shake my head.

"You walked into that one," I laugh, "She asked us to prove it and you looked like a damn deer caught in headlights. She knew you were lying."

"Whatever." Sugar rolls her eyes and starts to tap her feet again.

* * *

"I gotta pee." Sugar bounces on her knees and turns in circles in the middle of the airport to find the bathroom. "Watch my luggage!" She yells back at me when she's already halfway to the bathroom she's spotted. I roll my eyes and backtrack to stand next to her leopard print bag. I begin to feel restless so I reach into my shoulder bag to grab my phone.

Coincidentally my phone begins to ring the moment I grab it.

"Hello?"

"Hey, bitch." Quinn laughs into the phone.

"What do you want?" I ask her, "We just landed. I know we're late, you don't need to pester me about it." I tell her and check the clock on my phone.

"I know. I just called to make sure you landed on time. Which terminal are you losers in?" She asks me and it's then that I recognize the background noises coming from the other end. She's here.

"Santana!" Sugar suddenly screams into the phone on the other end I cringe as I pull the phone away from my ear. I turn around and find Sugar standing with Quinn and Rachel, all of them waving like there's no tomorrow. "Look who I found!" Sugar yells as they begin to walk towards me and I put my phone away.

"What are you guys doing here?" I hug Quinn, "I thought we were just gonna meet everyone at the cemetery?" I move to Rachel and hold her shoulders at arms length before smiling and bringing her in for a hug.

"Well," Quinn smiles, "We thought it wouldn't be the same going without everyone together." She turns around and that's when I see everyone else standing around fooling around with each other. Tina and Mike laughing with Sam and Mercedes, Finn and Puck probably arguing about something with Kurt and Blaine, and Sugar already sitting on Artie's lap. I look away before they start making out.

"Seriously?" I stare open mouthed at my friends as we slowly walk over to the crowd.

"Plus," Rachel links her arm in mine, "Nothing brings people together like an hour car ride in a few cramped cars. We got the chance to catch up with each other."

Quinn laughs at that, "Rachel, we got caught up within the first 5 seconds. The rest of the ride we were arguing."

"Well then we _bonded_." Rachel sticks her tongue out at Quinn and they laugh together.

"I'm gonna get everyone ready to go," Quinn tells us before she runs ahead of us and starts telling people what to do.

"Hey," Rachel stops walking and holds me back, "I'm happy to see you smiling. We haven't been talking as much as we used to." She frowns, "I wasn't sure if you were okay down there."

"I'm fine, Rach." I tell her as I begin to walk towards the group.

"Last year was rough," She tells me knowingly and stops my attempt at walking away, "I'm just worried."

I turn to face her, "Rachel," I hold her shoulders again, "Stop worrying." I smile, "I'm not going to bring everyone's mood down like last year. I was just in a very bad place then. I admit, I'm not completely better but I'm fine."

"Alright." She nods and smiles back, "Let's just have fun. How long are you guys planning on staying this time?"

"I don't know." I tell her as we both begin to walk towards the group, "Last two times we stayed about a week before wanting to rip everyone's throats out so that seems like a good amount of time again."

Rachel laughs and we follow everyone as we walk to the parking structure. "But you guys came late this year. Usually we all meet a few days before today."

"Yeah," I nod, "I had to finish up some last minute cheerleading paperwork shit. Today was the earliest we could come."

Rachel frowns at me before shrugging, "Well at least you're here now. It would've sucked if you couldn't make it until tomorrow."

"I know." I smile and think about the promise we all made. "I kept telling myself I would not accept being late. I made sure I got everything done in time so that I could make it." I tell her and she smiles. "I can't believe it's been three years already."

"Right? It still feels like it just happened." Rachel squeezes my arm and I nod, "I miss them." She breathes.

"Yeah," I tell her, "Me too." I look up at the sky when we make it outside and breathe in, "It's good to be back in Ohio." I smile at Rachel.

"It's good to be home." She corrects me and nudges me towards one of the cars.

* * *

I wish I got in the boys car. I really do.

"It's my turn!" Rachel bounces forward in her seat as she tries to reach for the iPod.

"You don't get a turn!" Tina slaps her hand away and holds the iPod away from Rachel. "You had the whole ride to the airport. That was the deal."

"I don't like this deal." Rachel pouts and sits back.

Quinn laughs at the drivers seat, "Rach, you're the very one that made the rule. You provided the car so you made the rules."

"My gay dads taught me that it was nice to share. I merely offered Tina the iPod music selection as courtesy to their teachings. I figured she'd offer it back when she realizes I have better taste in music."

"I'm choosing to ignore you." Tina glares at Rachel and then turns to me, "Santana, you wanna play something?"

"Sure." I shrug and reach for the iPod. I swat Rachel's grabby hands away and she sighs loudly.

"Fine, we'll listen to Santana's uncultured style in music." Rachel huffs and I scoff at her, "It can't get any worse than Tina and her love for kpop."

I laugh at that, "Oh, but it can," I smirk and Rachel looks at me as I unplug Tina's iPod and plug my own in. "Let us all enjoy the musical stylings of one Aaron Carter."

The car erupts in claps and screams and laughs while Rachel groans and whines. The music starts and soon she's joining in with us singing choruses and verses. Of course the amount of Aaron Carter songs I actually have aren't enough to last the ride so the remainder of time is spent on throwbacks to our childhood favorites. I have to admit. It was fun.

* * *

We pull up to the cemetery and park. As much fun as it was, an hour is way too long to be sitting next to Berry, Tina and Sugar at the same time. We get out of the cars and stretch out the stiffness in our bodies. I laugh along with Sugar and Mercedes at the pictures of Sam sleeping on Artie that Puck took. I'm pretty sure Trouty drool is something I never need to see again.

I remember the first time we came back. It was weird. There were others paying their respects and I think that was the first time I realized we never got to know Mr. Schue and Mrs. Pillsbury all that well. Sure we were all close but I had no idea who all those people were. I figured they were just people from their pasts.

The second anniversary was lonely. I was already feeling down from what happened with Brittany but it seemed like everyone else was feeling it too. I think it was just a bad year. The moment we got to the cemetery last year everyone's energy just skydived. We needed them and they were gone.

But we couldn't just not go. We promised Will and Emma that we would reunite every year. Technically we all just promised each other. Whether they're up there watching us or not, we promised so we came.

This year is different though. We all made it through our rough patches and survived. We're happier. As happy as we could be under the circumstances. As we funnel out of our cars, we start to make our way towards the familiar plots. Walking in clusters makes for a large crowd. I move from the top to the bottom by walking a little slower until I'm linking arms with Quinn.

"Hey," I tell her.

"Hey," She smiles.

"I'm sorry I was such a bitch last year." I apologize and she laughs at that.

"It's no big deal." She shrugs, "We all had a rough one last year. As long as you don't go off on Rachel in Spanish again. That was extremely terrifying." She shakes her head.

"That wasn't entirely my fault and you know it," I point my finger at her, "You saw it happen. She ran into me out of nowhere. Yelling back in classic Lima Heights fashion was appropriate behavior after that."

And just like that, my entire body collides with what I would assume to be Rachel Berry and the fucking floor. I don't even have to look to know it's her.

"Dios mío![Oh my God]" I rub my head as I pick myself off the floor and immediately search for Rachel. "Voy a matar a su...[I'll kill her]" I mutter to myself. I wobble on my feet as I face the rest of my friends who look like they've half seen a ghost and half confused. Maybe mostly confused. It's a weird look. And it isn't even directed at me. I turn slowly to look at what they were looking at when my shoulders are quickly grabbed, forcing me to look straight.

"Santana..." Quinn grabs me and I steady myself. What the hell is going on? When did everyone decide it was such a good idea to stop walking. I just fell on my ass because of it and the most they can do is look behind me?

"Is anyone else confused?" Sam tilts his head as he continues to look straight past me.

"Santana..." Quinn says my name again and I look at her. Worry. She's worried about something. "Sugar," She glances at Sugar, "Explain."

Sugar steps beside her with the same face and shakes her head. "I don't know what to say. I'm as lost as Trouty."

Okay now I'm starting to get frustrated. What the hell is going on? "Quinn," I grab her shoulders the same way she's grabbing mine, "What's wr-"

"San?" The soft sound of Brittany's voice fills my ears and my entire body tenses, my grip around Quinn's shoulder tightening.

"Ow ow ow." Quinn flinches and I let go. Everyone takes a step back and waits for me to turn around. She's here. Why is she here?

"Auntie Tana?" Emma's small voice reaches my ears and I shut my eyes. I feel little fingers grab my hand and I slowly turn around, avoiding Brittany's gaze and focusing in on the little girl.

"Val?" I kneel to her level and run my hand through her soft hair. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm visiting my mommy and daddy." She wipes her face softly and that's when I notice the faint red on her nose and cheeks. She'd been crying.

* * *

**AN: I don't know why but cliffhangers just love me...**

**On a more serious note, I know you all expected more in this chapter but I had to stop it there. What happens next needs to be Britt's Pov.  
**


	19. Back to the Start

**AN: Bear with me while we all get used to Val being named Emma. It might get a bit confusing but I'll try my best to make sure it's not. Just remember that Santana will still call Emma by her nickname 'Valerie'.**

**Song used is 'Hiding My Heart' by Brandi Carlile.**

**Brittany POV**

* * *

Chapter 19: Back to the Start

"Val?" Santana turns around slowly and kneels in front of Emma, "What are you doing here?"

"I'm visiting my mommy and daddy." Emma wipes her face softly with her jacket sleeve. I shake my head because I've been telling her to stop doing that since I first bought her that jacket. But it's okay now I guess. I'll let it pass this time.

"Your mommy and daddy?" Santana glances at me.

"Mhm." Emma grabs her hand and pulls Santana to her feet and they both walk over to the graves. I keep my eyes on Santana as Emma continues to talk and I register her confusion turn to shock.

"Britt?" Sugar steps up to me, "What's going on?"

"She looks good," I tell her, my eyes glued to Santana still.

"Why are you here?" Sugar tries again.

Emma runs up to Sugar before I can answer and they get reacquainted. I smile at the two and then wave at the rest of the group behind them. They just wave back awkwardly. Everyone's so confused. It's a lot to take in, I don't blame them.

I turn and walk towards Santana who is still standing and staring at the headstone like it'll be enough explanation. "Hey," I stop and stare down at the headstone with her, "She told you?" I ask and I can see the slight nod of her head.

"It's true?" She glances at me and I turn to face her fully.

"I was their surrogate." I tell her and she closes her eyes and clenches her jaw. She didn't know. Even after a whole year, no one told her still. Not Sugar nor Devin told her I was just the surrogate. I chuckle at that., thinking that they would've at least told her that much to get her to listen to them.

"I feel like an idiot." She mumbles.

I turn back towards the group and see them playing with Emma. Emma of course being the center of attention and loving it. "What are you guys doing here?" I realize then that I asked a stupid question. "The anniversary?" I look at Santana and she nods.

"What about you?" She asks me.

"Same. She said she wanted to come this year. It's my first time coming actually."

"I know," Santana nods and I tilt my head in confusion. "We come every year." She explains, "We would've seen you."

It's silent for a few minutes as I watch Emma and Puck running around while Santana seems to be looking at the headstones still. When I turn to look at her, she's already looking at me.

"Sorry," She looks away and I shake my head.

"It's okay." I try to smile and she shakes her head this time.

"No, I mean," She pauses, "_I'm so sorry._" She tells me again and I nod because I know exactly what she means.

"It's okay." I tell her.

* * *

Lying back on the grass in the middle of a cemetery is actually pretty relaxing. Why do people associate these places with fear? There's nothing to fear here. Except maybe the best friend of the girl I lied to, sitting a few yards away glaring at me while talking to said lied to girl. _Did that make sense?_

"Oh well," I shrug to myself and take a deep breath in as I close my eyes and try to get lost in the sounds of everyone's laughter.

"Brittany." Quinn smiles down at me and I open my eyes.

"Hi." I smile back and sit up as she sits down next to me. "This is awkward, huh?" I look to my side and watch Emma play with Sugar. They always looked cute together.

"I just can't believe he never told us about you and Emma." She tells me.

"If it's any consolation," I smile, "He talked about you guys a lot."

Quinn laughs at that, "Yeah well, we were a handful sometimes. I'm glad he got it out somewhere." She turns back towards Emma and smiles, "She looks just like them."

"Yeah," I smile when Emma waves at me, "She really does."

We sit in silence for a while until Quinn finally speaks again, "So we have this sort of party type thing for Will and Emma every year and this year it's at Rachel's dad's house. You and Emma wanna come with?"

I think about it, "Would it be okay though? I'm not sure I'm welcomed." I frown and glance at Rachel who is still staring at me.

"You're definitely welcome to come. I'll text you the address." She smiles at me and stands to go talk to Rachel and Santana.

For the next thirty minutes I subtly watch as Rachel dramatically waves her arms around as she argues with Quinn while Santana tries to ignore them and not so subtly glance at me. Maybe I'm not being as subtle as I think though because after a while I could see the faint smile on her lips every time I catch her.

* * *

I drive straight to the party after the cemetery. I decided to just follow their cars to the house. We took a little detour to Santana's family's house to drop them off. I guess they're gonna come later. It was nice to see though; the place where Santana grew up. Not so much 'the wrong side of the tracks' that she keeps bragging about. It was cute and homey.

"Mommy?" Emma speaks up from the back seat, "These people are _weird_," She pouts at me and I glance back at her through the rear view mirror.

"Why do you say that, baby?"

"Because they like to stare at me." She deadpans and I giggle, "All they do is stare at my face."

"Okay baby," I smile, "First thing when we get there I'll tell them to not stare at your face."

* * *

Hanging out with everyone is different now that they know about Emma. I can tell everyone has so many questions because I can see them talking about me on the other side of the room and every once in awhile someone will walk up to me but then chicken out and talk to me about something else.

It gets quiet and I notice everyone awkwardly glancing at me again. "Okay, you know what?" I speak up and everyone looks at me, "Just ask the questions you need answers to." I shake my head and smile, "I'm not going to bite."

"So you're our age..." Sam speaks up first, "But you had Will and Emma's kid?" He questions and I nod.

"And Emma was born after," Finn pauses, "You know... _after_."

I nod again.

"So you were _hired_ to be their surrogate?" Tina questions and this time I shake my head.

"Long story short," I tell them and that's when I notice Sugar and Rachel coming down the stairs with Santana behind them. "Long story short, Will and Emma helped me out when I was younger. I was returning the favor. But then they named me in their will's as sole beneficiary." I tell them and they all nod as they take it all in.

"How long did you know them?" Rachel asks me as she sits down next to Kurt, "You must've been really good friends if they did that right?"

"Well it actually wasn't that long. That's why it was such a surprise when I received the letter from them. I meet them both when I was fifteen. They, with a few other people, helped me get emancipated from my mother."

"Where were you the past two years?" Rachel questions further, "We come back every year and I've never seen you here."

"Rach," Quinn warns her from beside me and I shake my head.

"I couldn't." I duck my head. "I didn't even go to the funeral. I was pregnant at the time and I didn't want Emma to be there. Even if she was still in my belly, I felt like she'd know it was them. Once she was old enough to fly I moved straight to Hawaii. It's smaller, easier to control the circumstances surrounding us. I could protect her there."

Rachel doesn't question me after that.

"So wait, how come we've never heard of you?" Puck questions.

"I don't know." I shrug, "He actually offered me to meet you guys once." I shake my head, "I was too scared to come by. Sorry."

"This is so crazy," Artie looks at Emma playing on the small stage away from the group.

"He talked about you guys all the time though," I tell them, "I even came to your nationals performance in Chicago. I took off work and told my boss that I have to watch my best friend win." I smile at the memory.

"I remember now..." Santana mumbles and everyone looks at her. She looks up and her eyes widen. I guess she didn't mean for that to be so loud. She looks at me, "You were the pregnant girl." She tells me, "I opened the door and you were standing there."

I remember it as well. I also remember telling her about that during the first few weeks of becoming friends. I was testing the waters so to speak. Seeing if she'd remember me. If she'd remember me pregnant then. If she did then I would've told her right away. But she didn't, and I was left with still having no way of knowing how she'd take it.

"That's right," Sugar points at me, "I pulled Santana away because I was overly excited."

"Oh yeah," Puck turns to me, "You're that big chick that was hugging Will!"

"Puck!" Emma shouts into the microphone from Rachel's small stage and we all jump in our seats. "Take it back! That was _me_ in there!" She shouts and everyone laughs.

"Baby," I stand up and walk over to her, "You're not allowed to talk to people like that." She pouts and I purse my eyes at her. "That may work on Sugar but not me." I tell her and she lets it go.

"Auntie Sugar is too easy that's why." She jumps down from the stage.

"I heard that." Sugar yells and I roll my eyes.

"Puck," She speaks softer into the microphone as she walks towards him and I laugh at how much my daughter is a diva. I can tell Rachel is loving it though because she's staring at her like she's the most adorable thing ever. "I'm sorry." Emma smiles at Puck and he extends his hand out for a high five.

"It's alright little Wemma" He smiles when she jumps up to reach his hand.

"But don't be mean to my mommy ever again." She glares at him and I shake my head. I'll have to talk to her about that later. I don't know where she learned that one from. That is until I see Santana laughing hysterically.

* * *

"Santana!" Sam shouts to her on the other side of the room, "Come! Tell Brittany I'm not lying! You wrote a song about my lips in high school, right?" He laughs and I watch as she debates her decision in her head. Finally, she hesitantly walks over to us.

"Uh," She awkwardly looks at me, "Y-yeah, it was called T-trouty Mouth."

"That was you?" I try not to laugh and she blushes as she nods. Those damn dimples.

"Well, I thought it was a hit." She shrugs, "Mr. Schue didn't seem to think so though."

"Yeah, I remember him telling me about a student singing about lips before," I giggle, "I thought he was just messing with me."

"Nope," Sam shakes his head, "This one never lets me live it down."

"Trouty Mouth?" I turn to Santana and she nods. "I was wondering why that's his nickname."

"Well, now you know." She laughs. We stare at eachother for a while until finally Sam decides he's not needed and leaves us to be.

"San-" I start but she's quick to stop me.

"I gotta go." She tells me suddenly and I walks away.

* * *

I've been sitting in the same spot for about an hour now. This whole party thing was a pretty good idea actually. Emma can get all her energy out of her system now before we have to leave. I sip on my soda as I wait for the little girl to come to me and pass out.

"Brittany." Rachel sits next to me and I shift uncomfortably. She's made it pretty obvious that she's not happy with me right now.

"Rachel," I try to smile at her but she doesn't look at me. She just sits on the couch as both our eyes land on Santana singing and dancing on the stage with Emma.

"I'm really protective of her." She tells me.

"I am too, of Emma, I mean."

"I'm not sure if she's ever told you but Santana has trust issues." She looks at me and nod softly.

"I kind of figured that." The girl hasn't tried to contact me for a year. I'm pretty sure that told me loud and clear that she has trust issues.

"In high school," Rachel looks back to Santana, "There was this girl, her best friend, that she trusted with everything. She broke Santana's heart. She used her and lied to her and once she was done, she dropped her."

I continue to watch Santana as she laughs and runs around the small stage.

"She was completely broken." Rachel continues. "You were the first person she had any interest in after that. It took her _two year_s to get over that heartbreak. I was there for her then and I'm here for her now. I'm just looking out for her." She pauses, "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

I turn to Rachel as she studies my face and I nod. "You're a good friend, Rachel. Santana is lucky to have someone like you."

* * *

I place Emma in her safety seat and try to buckle her up slowly so as not to wake her. It proves to be very difficult as I try to reach over and it's times like these that i'm thankful for my long legs or else I'd never be able to gracefully do this.

"So where are you guys staying?" Santana speaks up behind me suddenly, making me jump and hit the car with the back of my head.

"Oww," I wince and awkwardly step out of the car.

"Shit," I hear her chuckle, "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"No it's okay." I turn around and rub my head. "We're staying at Eric's old house on Maplewood."

"Oh," She ducks her head, "He still owns it?"

"Yeah," I nod. It becomes silent after that with her looking anywhere but towards me and I awkwardly shift from one foot to the other. "Do you want to come ov-"

"Santana!" Rachel yells from the front door and we both turn to look at her. "Come back inside, we're doing shots!" She yells again and almost topples over the threshold.

"Rachel," Quinn comes up beside her and holds her up. She glances at us and looks back at Rachel, "Okay come on, let's let them be." She manages to get Rachel back through the door.

"Come on, Santana!" We can still hear Rachel's shouts through the closed door, "It tastes like pink!"

"Wow," I breathe out and Santana chuckles. "She's gonna feel horrible tomorrow."

It's silent again.

"You were gonna say something?" She prompts and looks at me expectantly. I think about it for a few seconds until finally I just decided to let it go.

"Nothing," I shake my head, "Nevermind."

"Oh," She looks away and I clench my jaw at my stupidity. I turn back towards the car and finish strapping Emma in. When I'm done I turn back to Santana and play with the car keys in my hand. This is so awkward. She steps back, "I'll let you go then." She nods and I nod back as I slowly make my way to the driver's side. "Unless," She speaks up and I stop walking, "You maybe wanna talk?"

I look at her over the hood of the car and smile, "Get in."

* * *

The drive isn't that long but it's quiet. The only noises are coming from the car and Emma's soft snoring. I park in the garage and open the backseat door to grab Emma. Santana helps me from the passenger side, and I'm grateful. Emma may be small but when she's sleeping her dead weight is like a fifty year old man _carrying_ a fifty year old man.

Santana helps me get her out of the seat and she runs around the car to help me close the door. "Keys?" She holds her hand out and I nod towards my purse.

"In my purse," I tell her and she maneuvers her way around Emma to fish them out. "The green one," I tell her and she look for it as we make our way to the door.

As soon as she gets it open I go straight to the guest room and place Emma on the bed. "Clothes?" Santana stops at the doorway and I nod towards Emma's little suitcase. She goes into it and hands me a pair of pajamas. "Goodnight, Val." She whispers and kisses Emma on her forehead, "I'll be in the living room." She tells me and leaves the room.

I change Emma into her sleeping clothes as gently as possible. She seems pretty beat though. She did have a big day. "Mommy?" She opens her eyes slightly when I tuck her into the blanket and I run my hand through her hair, "I like Auntie Tana." She mutters and grabs the little stuffed giraffe next to her.

I smile and kiss her on the cheek before turning on her night light and walking out of the room, leaving the door open just enough. I walk down the hall and stop when I see Santana walking throughout the living room looking at a few picture frames. Some of them with me in them.

I can't help but think that this all feels so normal. And _comfortable_. Driving home together, tucking in Emma together. Staying up late and talking. It feels good.

"What are you drinking?" I speak up and she turns around.

"Water," She smiles and takes another sip. "You want?" She holds it out and I shake my head as I walk towards her. I eye the picture she was staring at.

"That one was the day I got emancipated," I point to the picture, "Will and Emma were so proud of me. That's Tasha, Eric, me, and-"

"Abuela?" She squints her eyes and I tilt my head in confusion.

"Marie," I correct her and she turns to me.

"That's my grandmother." She traces her eyes over my face and I think about it. Grandmother. Marie is Santana's _grandmother_. Santana is Marie's _granddaughter_.

I look between the picture and Santana and notice the slight resemblance. "Wow," I shake my head. "I can't believe this."

"She was your social worker?" Santana asks me and I nod. She pauses for a bit, "Do you still talk to her?"

"No, we kind of had a falling out with Eric." I tell her and move to the couch. She follows and sits next to me, placing her glass of water on the coffee table.

"Yeah, me too." She says lowly and I look at her. I know exactly what she's talking about. Marie probably did the same to Eric as she did to Santana.

"How have you been?" I ask her and she fidgets with her fingers on her lap. I pull my leg under me and lean back against the armrest, "You wanted to talk, Santana." I remind her and she glances up at me.

"I know, it's just" She stops playing with her fingers and tucks them under her thighs, "I don't know where to begin."

"Well you could start by answering my question?" I smirk and she chuckles.

"I've been okay. School is kicking my ass right now."

"Same." I laugh.

"How are _you_?" She glances up and I shrug.

"Honestly?" I ask and she nods slightly. "I'm really confused." I tell her and she lifts her head to look at me.

"Me too." She mumbles.

"Santana." I duck my head. I'm so sick of this whole not communicating properly thing. All of this not saying what you mean, or saying it under your breath or hiding what you really feel. "Just say what you need to say."

She seems to contemplate that as she looks at me until finally, "You knew this whole time but you never said anything. You knew we were all a part of the glee club so why did you hide the fact that you knew Will and Emma?"

"I couldn't bring it up without you asking too many questions." I shake my head, "I wasn't ready to tell you about Emma then."

"Still," She shifts in her seat, "I was your girlfriend. I had the right to know."

"And I had the right to decide when to tell you." I'm quick to say back.

"I wouldn't have cared." She shakes her head, "You know that."

"Well apparently you did." I duck my head slightly, "The past year tells me that."

"That wasn't because of _Emma_. That was because of _you_."

"Why me?" My voice raises a little at that.

She stares at me like it was obvious, "My best friend lied to me. Everyone lied to me. _You_ told them to do that."

"And how many times have I told you sorry for that?"

"A lot." She scoffs and I look away. Why is she acting like this again?

"I'm new to this, Santana. I didn't know how to handle this whole _falling in love thing_. It's never happened to me before. I don't know dating etiquette as a mom. Do I introduce you to my daughter first? Later? When? What happens if I really like you but she hates you? What if she really loves you and you don't feel the same? There are so many different things that can go wrong here."

She doesn't answer me. She doesn't say anything in fact. We just sit there.

"You really hurt me, Britt," She finally settles on saying and I nod.

"I know. You hurt me too."

"I know." She nods, "So where do we go from here?"

"What do you mean?" I question.

"What happens to us now?" She says softly and I look away to think about it.

* * *

_Six months ago..._

_[E:] Open Mic. 8:30 pm. I'll be outside._

_I check Eric's message one more time and sigh. I don't want to go. I know why he wants me there. Santana is going to be there and at this point I don't even know what to think of our relationship. She won't answer my calls, she won't answer my texts, she won't do anything. I've already wasted six months on this._

_Sugar quit her job working for me and now Devin refuses to talk to me about anything Santana related. I found out last week that they're still friends. I'm hurt. Hurting. So why would I put myself through more pain by going to the same bar that Santana and I confessed our love for each other. The same bar she walked away from me at._

_I glance at the clock, 7:45 pm._

_[B:] Coming now._

_Why do I do this to myself_

* * *

_"Eric!" I yell from across the street as I step out of the taxi and he waves me over._

_"You're late," He grabs my hand and pulls me into the bar. We stand outside the double doors and he catches his breath._

_"What's' wrong?" I ask concerned._

_"Ryan texted me earlier today." He checks his watch, "Devin told him that he's going to sing tonight."_

_"What?" My eyes widen and I step towards the door to see for myself but Eric pulls me back._

_"He's singing with Santana." He explains further, "About us."_

_"Us?"_

_"Apparently they've been talking about it for a while. After him and Joel broke up and you and her broke it off." He shakes his head, "He told Ryan to keep it a secret, Britt. Devin and Santana are in there right now."_

_"I don't know, Eric..."_

_"I need to hear it," He begs, "Don't you want to too? You'll finally get to see how Santana feels."_

_I look at the double doors. I've come to hate this place over the months. It's only filled with bad memories. "Alright," I tell him and he hugs me._

_"Thank you." He breathes, "I couldn't do this without you."_

_I hold his hand as we walk in together and we quickly find a seat in the back, away from the lights and definitely away from the stage. They won't be able to see us here but we'll have a clear view of them. Right now there's a guy singing at the piano so no one really noticed us walk in._

_"Thank you." The man on stage bows and everyone claps. It's a few minutes before we finally are greeted with the sight of Santana and Devin walking up the wooden steps and into the light._

_"He's gonna play," Eric points out the guitar strapped over Devin's shoulders._

_"Hello," Santana waves to the audience as the both take their seats on two stools, "This is 'Hiding My Heart'." She turns to Devin and nods as he begins to play._

_This is how the story went_

_I met someone by accident_

_Who blew me away, blew me away_

_And it was in the darkest of my days_

_When you took my sorrow and you took my pain_

_Santana sings the melody while Devin harmonizes with her. It's beautiful actually. Their voices blend well. I focus on Devin and notice how much he's changed in the past few weeks. When Joel broke up with him he was so lost. He turned to Santana and they've been hanging out since._

_I wish I could lay down beside you_

_When the day is done_

_And wake up to your face against the morning sun_

_But like everything I've ever known_

_You'll disappear one day_

_It's not surprising that they're singing this together. They both have the same mind when it comes to relationships. They're guarded and scared and most importantly, they fall. They like to fall hard and hope it works. But when it doesn't, they're left broken. With nowhere to turn._

_Woke up feeling heavy hearted_

_I'm going back to where I started_

_The morning rain, the morning rain_

_I realize then that she's not singing to me. She saying goodbye. She's saying that she's done. I just so happened to be here to hear it. I glance at Eric and I know he realizes the same. After everything that he's been through with Devin, he's just not enough anymore. We've all been hurt. Some more than others I guess._

_But like everything I've ever known_

_You'll disappear one day_

_So I'll spend my whole life hiding my heart away_

_It's loud and clear…_

_I can spend my whole life hiding my heart away_

_She doesn't want me back…_

* * *

"Brittany?" Santana speaks up again and I'm snapped out of my memories, "Did you hear me?"

"Huh?" I blink blankly at her and shake my head slightly.

"What happens to us now?" She repeats and I think about it.

"We can be friends." I finally say, "Just friends."


	20. Broken

**AN: ****Don't give up on Santana just yet, my lovelies. Her fight is just getting started. **  


**Santana Pov**

* * *

Chapter 20: Broken

_Have you ever had one of those days where you wake up and just know that it'll be complete shit?_

_That day is today._

* * *

"Mami, nothing happened." I roll my eyes at Sugar doing the shimmy in the kitchen. It's way too early for this. I don't know how she's even able to open her eyes right now.

"Come on, Santana." Quinn speaks up from the computer, "It's been weeks. You have to come clean sometime. You slept over. You can't blame us for thinking something happened." Sugar turns back toward the stove and hugs her body while making kissing noises, pretending to be making out with someone.

"I need new friends," I mutter and Quinn laughs. "I've already told you guys," I kick Sugar in the back of her knee making her almost fall, "I went over to talk to her. It got late so Brittany offered me her bed." I roll my eyes, "Not like that. She slept in Val's room and I slept in her bed."

"Nothing happened?"

"We established our friendship?" I tilt my head, still not even knowing what that means.

"And after?" Sugar prompts and flips one of her pancakes.

"And nothing," I shrug, "She dropped me off at Rachel's house the next morning because my car was there from the party."

"Also me," Sugar sings from the stove and I nod.

"Also you. I had to scrape your drunk ass off the floor of her basement."

"Wow," Quinn narrows her eyes, "Nothing really did happen."

"Told you."

"Did you _want_ something to happen?" She raises her eyebrow and I shrug.

"I don't know." I tell her honestly and Sugar looks at me.

"Well, you have about twenty-four hours to figure it out." She tells me and I tilt my head. "We're going to Emma's birthday party tomorrow."

"Wait, what?"

"Yep," She turns around and flips another pancake, "Got the invite a few days after we came back to Hawaii. I already RSVP'd."

"You did _what_?" I shake my head.

"Right on, Sugar." Quinn laughs and I glare at her.

"Shug, I can't go." I shake my head again. "There's no way I'm going."

"Oh come on," Sugar sits next to me, "You'll be fine. You guys are friends now, right?"

I think about it. This is going to be so awkward. I don't know if I can do it. I'm still trying to process the fact that Valerie is a mini Wemma and that I've been an asshole this whole time. The fact that Brittany even wants to be my friend still is a miracle at this point. I just don't think I can face her again. At least not yet. We text occasionally but I don't ever actually see her face to face.

"Mami, I-"

"You're going, Santana." Her expression is hard, "I am not taking _No_ as an answer."

* * *

Turns out Sugar's little pep talk resulted in the burning of my pancakes. I attempted to eat them but then she threw them out and tried to make a new batch before I had to leave for work. It didn't happen. So now I'm on my way to work, hungry and cranky.

I turn the corner and prepare myself to see Brittany sitting at the bus stop like on a usual Friday morning. I smile at the familiar sight of Brittany 'foot dancing' to some sort of tune. She still doesn't have an iPod but she's clearly got something playing in her mind. That girl.

I smile mischievously and press on my steering wheel making her suddenly jump and look around. I drive straight just as she realizes it's me and I almost miss her laughing when I pass her. My phone buzzes in the cup holder beside me.

_[B:] That wasn't funny..._

_[S:] So why were you laughing? _

_[B:] :P_

I smile to myself and put my phone back down.

* * *

It must be karma that I get a flat tire after scaring Brittany. I was just about to get on the freeway when it happened. I lean against my car and wait for Devin to show up. There's no way I'm paying for roadside assistance. Like an idiot, I didn't replace my spare tire from pretty much last year and now I'm stranded.

Just as I'm about to turn away I notice a bus coming up the road. It passes me and I wonder...

_[B:] You okay? Just passed you on the bus..._

I smile softly at Brittany's text and type back a response.

_[S:] Just a flat. I'm okay. Thanks._

"Should I come back another time?" Devin yells from his truck and I look up from my phone.

"Shut up." I put my phone away and walk up to his window.

"Who are you talking to?" He smirks.

"No one," I hold my hand over my face to block the sun, "It's hot. We gonna do this or what?"

He raises his eyebrows at that and I walk away to avoid further questions. The day already started off horrible. I really don't need anything that would make it worse. I step around my car to stand by the tire that hates me and wait for Devin to park.

"Alright let's see it," He claps and rubs his hand together, "Just a flat?" He looks at me and walks around the trunk towards me. "Whoa, what is that?" He points to my feet and I look down.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I almost yell. Dog shit. DOG SHIT ON MY SHOES. MY SHOES.

* * *

I make it to work twenty minutes late and I don't stop to hear even a syllable leave my boss' mouth. I'm far too irritated. I stop walking when I realize that Rick isn't even in his office. I smirk as I glance around and slowly walk back. When I get there I take my shoe that now has very little remnants left of dog shit and rub it very aggressively into the carpet near his desk.

"Santana?" Rick's voice stops me and I turn around quickly with a big smile.

"Rick!" I squeak out. I clear my throat, "Hey, how's it going? Just stopping in to say hey." I inwardly cringe at that.

"Well good because you're just the person I'm looking for." He sits down at his desk and looks around cautiously. I think he can smell the dog shit. Good. "You're fired." He deadpans and my mouth drops open.

"What?" I begin to boil.

"Nah, I'm just messing with you." He starts laughing hysterically and I try my very hardest to keep a straight face on as I awkwardly laugh with him. "Seriously though," He dies down the laughter, "You need better numbers, Lopez. Christy is making twice as much as you right now and she just started a few months ago."

"Christy can kiss my ass." _IS WHAT I WANTED TO SAY._

"Santana," Rick clicks through his computer. "I want you to spend the rest of your shift listening in on Christy's calls. I'll set it up at your cubicle. Make sure you learn something, okay?" He shoos me away and I'm nearly bursting with rage.

Is he fucking serious right now? I TRAINED CHRISTY. I did that. Not him, not anyone else. The only reason my numbers are slacking right now is because I've been throwing Christy a few of my calls every now and then. I _know _she slacks when it's slow. For her to brag about it and shove it in everyone else's faces after just irritates me. Fucking bitch.

"Hey, Santana." Christy chirps from her cubicle and I ignore her.

* * *

It's finally my lunch break and I can't wait to get food into me. I've spent the majority of my morning shooting spit wads into the air at just the right angle to land on Christy the next cubicle over. It was pretty funny actually. Since I'm listening in on her calls, I can hear her reactions. Every time it land on her, she'll pause mid sentence and I'll try my hardest not to laugh out loud.

I grab my blazer and make my way down the elevator to the lobby. I'm feeling a little fast foody today. Or maybe some Chinese take-out. I step out of the office building and am greeted with the not so fresh air of Downtown Honolulu. I begin to walk to my usual take out restaurant but stop in my tracks when some guy moves right in front of me.

You know what I hate more than stuck up businessmen? Stuck up businessman talking on their Bluetooth _while_ riding a razor scooter. Like who even does that? I always have the urge to thrust kick one of them and yell, 'YOU LOOK STUPID RIDING THAT'.

I make it to the restaurant and order my usual. As I'm waiting for my order I pull out my phone and check my messages. Two missed calls from Sugar with matching voicemails, and six text messages. One from Sugar of course, one from Rachel and four from Brittany.

I check my voicemails first.

"Santana," Sugar yells into the phone, "You need to call me." I shrug and delete it, knowing Sugar it's probably not as important as it sounds. I check the next one, "SANTANA LOPEZ. WHEN YOU GET OFF WORK YOU NEED TO CALL ME. IT REALLY IS AS IMPORTANT AS I'M MAKING IT SOUND." I chuckle to myself and delete that one too.

I open my text messages.

_[R:] Just checking in on you. Sugar called me. Call me when you can._

_[S:] Please disregard the urgency of the two voicemails. I've just got off the phone with Rach and she told me that in order to keep you as calm as possible I have to be somewhat calm myself. She said it doesn't help you if I'm also freaking out._

I read that one again. Okay, something really is important. I'll need to talk to Sugar as soon as I get home from cheer practice. I'm beginning to hate this day even more, if it were possible. Honestly, the only thing that is making my day somewhat bearable are the four text messages from Brittany.

_[B:] She's talking to me again so that's good, right?_

And then almost ten seconds later.

_[B:] That was meant for Eric... Sorry. Please ignore it... _

Another ten seconds,

_[B:] Eric, I'm so dumb..._

Five seconds,

_[B:] OMG I GIVE UP_

* * *

"Santana!" Rick shouts from across the street and I debate my options of either ignoring it and turning around, or throwing on a fake smile and walking up to him. "Santana!" He calls again and I throw my fake smile on.

"Hey Rick," I walk across the street and motion to my food, "I'm on lunch right now so I'm just gonna go upstairs and eat."

"No, no, no." He grabs my arm, "Look, Blood Bank of Hawaii is doing a drive," He waves over a volunteer, "Don't you want to help people?" He questions and I keep my fake smile on as I nod cautiously. Whatever gets me back on the good list, I guess. Even if that means needles. Plus, Rick is letting me take an extra hour for 'Lunch'.

It takes about 30-45 minutes for the whole donating process to be done. I had to answer all these questions, do a bunch of screening tests and then finally just sit at a table with a needle attacking my arm. I really didn't mind it actually. I was looking forward to the free snack and juice the whole time, even though I still didn't eat my lunch. Now that I think about it, I probably shouldn't be giving blood right now. No breakfast, no lunch, and I have cheer practice after work.

After about 10 minutes of just sitting around after giving blood, I finally make my way slowly up to the office. I'm so ready to eat my lunch that I bought. Thank god I still have about 20 minutes left of my lunch break.

The moment the elevator doors open and I step out, Rick runs up to me and pulls me into a meeting. I guess no lunch for me today. That's okay, I'm only sitting down at work. Nothing serious.

* * *

I ran out of napkins to make spit wads. I stand and peek over at Christy's cubicle to see my work and almost burst into laughter. I need to make a reminder to aim a little more left. I can make out most of the spit wads on the right side, and Christy clutching her paperwork and phone towards the left to avoid them as much as possible.

She already knows it's me too but she's too scared to say anything. She found out when she went to the bathroom and stopped when she saw me about to shoot another wad into her cubicle. I just shrugged like it was nothing and she should've known it was me from the beginning. And then I shot her in the tit.

At least now if I get fired I have the comfort in knowing that it was for doing something completely awesome.

I guess it's a good thing that I ran out of napkins though. I'm starting to feel a little lightheaded and I feel like I really need something to eat. Glancing at the clock, I note only about an hour and a half left of this hellhole. Then it's off to cheer practice. Maybe I'll pick up a snack on the way. Chipping away at my saltine cracker reserve just isn't doing it for me.

* * *

"Coach!" Jenny throws her hands in the air dramatically, "I can't do this! I can not top this pyramid with that _slut_ at the bottom." She points angrily at Ashley.

Ashley scoffs, "Like we could hold your fat ass up anyway."

"You're just going to drop me on purpose!"

"It's not on purpose if you keep eating."

"Coach!" Jenny screams and I drop the bullhorn that I was carrying and stalk over to them.

"Move!" I yell at the others that are in my path and they part for me. "Both of you," I look at the two girls, "You're off the team until you can learn to keep your own high school drama bullshit off this field."

"WHAT!?" They both scream and I hold my bitch stare.

"Stacy!" I yell at the girl behind me and she runs up from the bench. When she reaches me I give her a quick look over and smile coldly, "Congratulations, you're gonna learn to be a base today."

I shoo the arguing teenagers out of the way and get everyone into their positions.

"Stacy, I'm gonna show you what to do." I tell her and get into the position she should be in. "Watch carefully so you know. I'm only going to do it once but I'll help you after. Don't rush, and definitely don't think you need to get it right the first time. Just take your time to get it right."

Stacy nods and steps back.

"Alright girls!" I yell around me, "Let's get this right!"

* * *

My mind awakens and I have to blink away the bright white dots in my vision. _Where am I?_

"Santana?" Sugar speaks up from beside me and I turn my head. That's when I realize where I am. _The hospital_.

"What happened?" I try to sit up but my head is seriously pounding.

"What kind of idiot eats practically nothing all day and then volunteers as a base during cheerleading practice in the hot sun!" She whacks my left arm and I wince. It isn't until I try to reach over to swat her away when the piercing pain in my right arm finally shows itself.

"What the fuck?" I look over at my arm.

"Apparently the kind of idiot that doesn't mind passing out, breaking their wrist, and getting a concussion to top it off." She scolds me and I drop my head back on the pillow. Which of course makes it hurt again.

"How long have I been out?" I mutter and close my eyes to stop the dizziness.

"About four hours." She sits back and flips open her magazine. "They called me when the ambulance brought you in. You apparently blacked out when dismounting your pyramid? I don't know. Some girl was trying to explain it but I'm pretty sure I was ignoring her because I don't remember any of it."

"Are the girls okay? Any of them hurt?" I ask worried.

"They're fine. Don't worry."

"I can't believe I blacked out."

"Yeah," Sugar shrugs, "It's a clean break though. At least it's just your wrist and you can still bend your elbow. Plus doc says it should only take a 5-6 weeks to heal. We have to watch your concussion for the next 10 or so days, but other than that, you're all good. _Cutie_ over there says we can be released after you wake up and get one last look from the doc."

Sugar motions behind her and I strain to look at this so-called _cutie_. And of course it's a guy. I grunt as I back down and glare at Sugar as she laughs beside me.

"Thanks for picking black," I tell her, referring to the color of my cast.

"You got lucky," She chuckles softly, "They were out of animal print and bright pink."

"I would've killed you." I narrow my eyes at her and she laughs.

"Yeah, well save your anger for tonight."

"Why?" I ask her. "What happened now?

"I'll tell you when we get home. Now's not a good time."

I watch as she tries to calmly flip through the pages of her magazine. Something is up. I don't know what yet, but something is definitely wrong.

* * *

I slowly get into Sugar's car and she closes the door as soon as I'm seated. I look at my cast again and shake my head. This really is the worst day of my life. I'm such an idiot.

"You don't like it?" Sugar frowns from the passenger seat and I shake my head.

"No, no. I do. Thanks." I force a smile and look at her drawing. Of course, she was the first to sign my cast and in classic Sugar fashion, she drew animal spots all around the top area. Well, animal spots mixed in with hearts. It was done in silver so it actually looked pretty cool in contrast to the black.

"I left a lot of space for other people to sign too." She smiles and I nod. She goes into her purse and pulls out a little keychain of mini sharpies. "I got this too. I figured I'd come in handy for when others wanna draw too."

"Thanks," I mutter and sit back. I'd say it was a sweet gift but I'm just not feeling too good right now.

"Are you okay?" She pauses from starting the car and turns to me, "Dumb question, I know, but I haven't seen you actually smile all day."

"Sugar," I sigh and close my eyes, "My day was _so_ bad I feel like crying right now." I open my eyes and roll my head to look at her, "If you don't start this car and get me home to sulk in my bed right now, I'll break _your_ wrist.

Her eyes widen and her mouth opens in an 'o' shape as she turns away and puts the car in reverse. "Well, I don't care what you say," She exit the parking structure, "We're making a quick stop to the drugstore to pick up your meds and maybe if you're nice, I'll even pick up a bucket of your favorite ice cream."

"I don't like ice cream..." I purse my eyes at her and she smiles widely at me.

"Well I do. And it looks like I'm gonna need it if I have to take care of your grumpy face for the next few days."

* * *

I roll my eyes and move my hand in a talking motion while I hold the phone away from my ears for a few good seconds. Sugar giggles beside me and I bring the phone back to my ear to see if the ramblings have stopped yet.

"-and another thing, you should know by now-" I pull it away again and continue on with my hand movements.

Sugar pulls the car into the shopping center, "You gonna come in with me or wait here?"

I bring the phone back to my ear, "-ana, are you even listening to me?"

"Quinn, I gotta go. Someone followed us home and now we're scared for our lives. Oh no, he's walking up to the car..."

"WHAT!? SANT-"

_Click._

"That was mean." Sugar looks at me and I laugh. "She's only worried about you. You didn't have to make it worse."

"I'm _fine_. I told Rachel that when she called and I told Quinn when she called thirty seconds after. Lecturing me for twenty minutes does nothing. If anything it made my headache worse. They were asking for it."

She stares at me for a few seconds until finally I pull my phone back out and type in a quick text to Quinn telling her that I was joking. It should've been a given though. She makes like I wouldn't have been able to protect Sugar and myself from some random guy. Concussion or not, I can still kick ass.

We walk into the store and Sugar goes straight for the ice cream aisle. I walk a little slower and make my way through the aisles. I make it to the pharmacy section in the back and wait in line. I really need something to get rid of this headache.

Someone taps my shoulder from behind and I turn around slowly. Brown meeting blue.

"Hey," She smiles softly.

"Hi," I manage to breathe out. Something tugs on my arm and I look down to find Valerie.

"Hey," I lean down and she smiles, "I heard it's your special day tomorrow."

"You're coming right?" She asks me and I nod. "Good."

I stand back up and Brittany smiles at me.

"My little M&M!" Sugar comes running up and swoops Val up. "You wanna go look at the ice cream with me?" Sugar looks at Brittany. When she nods, Sugar blows a raspberry kiss to Val's cheek before running off.

"What happened?" Brittany asks cautiously as she looks at my cast.

"Bad day." I tell her and she nods in understanding. "What are you guys doing here?" I ask, noticing that she was actually standing in line with me.

"Emma has an small ear infection. I took her to the doctor today. She'll be fine for tomorrow though." She assures me.

"She must be excited. It's gonna be at Eric's house right?"

"Mhmm." She nods. "Are you here for your wrist?"

"That and a concussion." I tell her and she looks at me concerned. "I'm fine. It was just an accident at cheer practice earlier."

"Well," She smiles mischievously and goes into her purse, "May I?" She holds a sharpie in her hand and I nod slowly as I hold my arm out for her. I don't even register the fact that it's pink until the moment the first line in drawn.

"It's pink," I cringe and she giggles as she continues to write on my cast. "Oh god, it's _pink_."

"Stop moving, San." She scolds me, "Or else you'll have an _ugly_ pink drawing that you'll be forced to stare at."

Drawing? I wonder what she's drawing. I try to look over her right hand but she moves her body closer to me and blocks my view. She cradles my right arm between her torso and her right elbow as she draws and my eyes fall on her body. It's right there in front of me. Nearly touching me and I feel like my whole being is frozen. The fact that she moved without hesitation stuns me.

"Almost," She mumbles and I can almost imagine her face right now. Eyebrows knit in concentration, tongue sticking out just enough, eyes focused. "Done," She tilts her head to inspect her work before stepping away and letting me see.

I nearly laugh out loud at how cute it is. She drew a pink mini dinosaur holding pom poms, shouting out unrecognizable words in some weird language that I'm not even sure exists. I point to it to ask what it means and she shrugs. I guess not.

"Thanks," I tell her and she smiles. Before it gets too silent and the awkward begins to set in, I'm being called up to retrieve my medication. When I'm done I stand off to the side and wait for her.

"Cute," Sugar speaks up as she eyes the new addition to my cast. "I watched the whole thing by the way." She quirks an eyebrow and I roll my eyes.

"I wanna see!" Valerie jumps up and lean down to show her. She stares at it for a few seconds and smiles widely up at Sugar.

"What?" Sugar whispers playfully, "What is it?"

"That's my mommy's secret words," Val glances at me and giggles.

"Really?" Sugar looks at me and I shrug. "Do you know what _that_ means?" Sugar points to the confusion of scribbles on my cast and Val nods. "Tell me?"

Valerie thinks it over for a bit before glancing behind me to see if her mom is still far away. She motions Sugar to come closer and holds her hands up to her mouth to block my listening ears from hearing. When they're done Sugar gasps playfully and Val giggles again.

"Really?" Sugar picks her up and she nods.

"What?" I ask hurriedly, "I wanna know, tell me too." I lean in but she shakes her head.

"It's a secret."

"Oh," Sugar smiles and glances behind me, "Gotta go. Forgot to grab the chocolate syrup."

I turn around just as Brittany reaches me. "They look like they're having fun." She laughs as she watches them hurry down the aisle. She turns to me expectantly and I know that look. "You know," She steps closer and I have this strange feeling that she's flirting now, "I heard that when a broken bone heals, it becomes stronger than before."

Now I'm lost. Is she flirting with me? I can't tell if she's still talking about my arm or maybe something else. Maybe us. "That's a myth actually." I tell her and she smiles.

"Well then, lets prove them wrong." She tells me softly and I just stand there stuck. She's definitely not talking about my arm. I just don't understand it. How can she be so forgiving to me?

"Britt," I duck my head and my skin forms goosebumps. It's a weird feeling. They're not good feeling goosebumps. I've only gotten these types of goosebumps from one other person. Something is wrong.

"_Sanny_?" A voice speaks up from behinds me. My eyes widen at the familiar voice and the familiar way my skin freezes over at the close proximity of her body. I turn around slowly as my eyes take it all in.

_Have you ever had one of those days where you wake up and just know that it'll be complete shit?_

"T-"

"Taylor?" Brittany cuts me off and I snap my head in her direction. What?

_Today is that day._

"Brittany?" Taylor's eyes widen as do mine.

_Times infinity_.

* * *

**AN: ****So s****orry this is late. There's just something about Naya being on the same small damn island as me that does things to a person. I swear I'd just die if I were to ever meet her. Regardless, this should have been up a while ago and I apologize deeply for that. For those of you that don't remember Taylor (I don't blame you, I've only used her name a few times) please refer to chapter four.  
**

**********Happy Mother's Day everyone! Have a great one :)**


	21. A Single Kiss Part I

**Brittany POV**

Chapter 21: A Single Kiss Part I

* * *

"Brittany? Is that really you?" Taylor smiles widely at me.

"Oh my God Taylor! I can't believe it's you. How long has it been?" I open my mouth in disbelief as she steps up to us.

"Too long." She opens her arms and I move to hug her, "Way too long." She says as she tightens her hold on me.

"How are you?" I pull away and give her a good look over, "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here on business." She tells me, "I got the job offer a couple of weeks ago. It might be permanent thing. This is so crazy. What about you? You live here now?"

"Yeah," I tell her, "Just down the street."

She nods and then glances at Santana and tilts her head in question, "Together?"

Santana chokes on air almost instantly, "What?" she clears her throat and laughs awkwardly as she glances at me and shakes her head, "No no no. I mean, I live down the street too but we're not together."

Taylor smiles at that and I look at Santana. "Really now?" Taylor says as she chuckles, "That's great news for me at least." I turn my head back to Taylor and something rises deep in my stomach. What did she mean by that? It's pretty silent after that comment. No one says anything and I glance between the awkward eye contact of the two other girls.

"Wait," Santana breaks the silence, "How do you two know each other?"

"We were in the same dance class as kids." I explain to her and I watch as she puts the pieces together in her head.

"Yeah." Taylor nudges my arm, "But it wasn't as much fun after you left."

"Dance classes?" Santana interrupts as she still tries to figure it out, "With my abuela?"

"Oh yeah that's right!" I smile and remember that Marie is her grandmother. "Small world."

"Yeah, small world." Taylor smiles, "Did you know Sanny took classes too?" She looks at Santana and I shake my head.

"Really?" I look at Santana and she ducks her head. It's been so long since then. I wonder if we've ever meet as children.

"Sanny became my new bestie when you left. She actually just made it to our class when you left. Could you imagine if we had all been in the same class?" Taylor looks between the two of us, "We would've had so much fun!"

"Such a shame." Santana voice is dripping of sarcasm as she rolls her eyes, "Too bad your class was too advanced for little old me." She scoffs and I look at her to see for myself to see if she's actually being serious. Why is she being so mean? It's off putting to say the least.

"I was always a step ahead of poor Sanny here." Taylor reaches to pinch Santana's cheeks but Santana glares at her, "Always a step behind me." Taylor shakes her head.

"Well I do remember _coming out_ before you so I have that I guess." Santana spits and I shake my head at her.

"Unfortunately." Taylor says softly and that seems to get Santana's attention, "Tack that onto the list of things I wish I could change." She mumbles as they stare at each other for what seems to be forever.

"Mommy?" Emma walks up to us slowly and tugs on my arm.

"_Mommy_?" Taylor looks at me.

"Yep," I reach down and pick Emma up, placing her on my hip, "Living the mother life nowadays. This is Emma, my daughter. Emma, this is Aunty Taylor, an old friend of mine."

Taylor beams as she steps closer and shakes Emma's small hands, "Emma huh? You are so adorable."

"I like you." Emma smiles.

Taylor giggles, "Thank you! I like you too."

"Do you wanna come to my birthday party tomorrow?" Emma asks her and I look at Taylor with a smile as we wait for her response.

"It's your birthday tomorrow?" Taylor gasps playfully making Emma laugh along, "Well that depends, do I have to bring a present?"

Emma opens her mouth in disbelief, "Of course."

I shift Emma in my arms and look at her, "Emma." I warn her and she pouts.

"No..." She shakes her head and looks back at Taylor, "You don't have to."

Taylor laughs, "But of course I do!" She exclaims, "What kind of friend would I be if I don't give you a present for your birthday?"

Sugar comes up to us and eyes Taylor carefully before turning to Santana who just nods. Finally Sugar turns to Emma and holds out her arms, "Emma wanna help me pick out yogurt? You can get the raspberry one?"

Emma nods and I hand her over to Sugar who gladly gets her away from the awkward tension surrounding Santana and Taylor. I wonder what kind of history these two have with each other.

"So, Santana," Taylor grins.

"Taylor." Santana says in the most monotone voice I've ever heard come from her lips.

"It's good seeing you." Taylor looks her over and I push down that strange feeling in my stomach again, "You look great."

"Thanks," Santana says in the same tone as before.

"Look I gotta go." Taylor points toward the registers, "But I guess I'll be seeing you guys at the party?"

"Sure," I go into my purse and grab an invitation, "11am. My number is on there. It's at my friend's house. The directions are there."

She grabs the small flier and looks at it, "Oh damn, I have a meeting around that time." She frowns and I do so as well.

"Well actually, that's just for lunch. We're moving the party to Ice Palace after. Emma couldn't decide if she wanted a moon bounce or to go ice skating, You're welcome to come then. Know the place?

"Not really no, but I could figure it out. Sound like fun. I'll see you guys there." She smiles and we hug one more time before she leaves.

It's silent again as Santana looks everywhere but towards me. I replay the entire thing in my head again as I try to figure out why that was so awkward. Also, what in the world was that feeling earlier? That couldn't have been jealousy right? It's not. I'm not really the jealous type.

Am I?

"Are you really just inviting her?" Santana speaks up and I'm snapped from my thoughts. I look at her and she looks like she's fuming. The smoke coming out of her ears is nearly visible.

"Why wouldn't I?" I raise my eyebrow, "Wait," I think it over again, "I think she went to McKinley too. Did you know her there?"

"Did I know her?" Santana laughs sarcastically again and I roll my eyes. She sees it though and ducks her head, "Yeah," She says seriously this time, "I did. Like she said, we were _besties_."

"That's so crazy." I shake my head and wave at Emma as her and Sugar make their way towards us. I don't question it. The one part of that sentence that doesn't make sense to me.

_Were._

What does that mean?

* * *

"Brittany!" Devin shouts into the house from the back door, "Where's the charcoal?"

"What?" I lean out from the kitchen and he repeats the question. "I don't know, Devin. This isn't my house. Ask Eric." I tell him and he frowns.

"Ask him for me?" He whispers as he glances around to make sure Eric isn't standing right there. I shake my head, "Please, Britt. I need you to ask him."

"Fine." I roll my eyes, "I don't understand why you can't just ask him yourself."

"I just can't." He tells me before closing the screen door and going back to the grill.

I turn around and go back to the stove, "Wanna explain what's going on?" I ask Eric. He's been in the kitchen the whole time, hearing the entire exchange between Devin and I.

"Ask him." Eric huffs angrily as he jumps down from the counter and walks out of the room.

"This is gonna be a long day." I mumble to myself as I stir the small pot.

* * *

Santana and Sugar arrive about fifteen minutes late to the party. I don't know if this would be considered a party though. It's really just the band of gays that I'm usually around, Santana and Sugar, and a few of Emma's playdates with parentals.

Maybe this _is_ a party. I wouldn't know.

"It smells great." Sugar walks up to the back door and watches as Devin works the grill. Santana nods as she awkwardly tries to figure out whether to sit somewhere or stand. Finally she decides to go outside and stand by Sugar.

I go outside shortly after and laugh along with some of the parents as we watch the little ones play in the moon bounce. Glancing around, I smile as when I see Santana finally notice the theme of the party. Her eyes go wide when she's handed a cup, then she looks up at the decorations, then finally around to the giant sized dinosaur themed moon bounce.

All of which had been Emma's ideas. I guess Santana was a bigger influence on Emma's life than she thought. More than _I_ thought for that matter.

She walks over to the blown up structure and smiles. I watch from the opposite side as Emma jumps over to her side of the wall and starts talking with her. Soon their laughing together and Santana nods as Emma smiles widely.

Santana runs over to the entrance and glances around to make sure no one will see her as she takes her shoes off, climbing very ungracefully into the moon bounce with a broken wrist. It was so obvious that I think it's cute that she thinks nobody noticed. I glance back at Sugar and Devin who both seem to have noticed and are laughing with each other as they watch Santana jump around like a child.

The other parents walk up to me and soon it turns out that everyone is watching the kids playing with Santana.

"Is it okay for her to be in there like that?" Eric points to her cast and I shake my head.

"Nope. It's probably not." I chuckle, "But I mean, would she even listen if you told her not to?"

"Probably not." Eric laughs. As he grabs a pair of chairs and we sit down together, "She looks good with them." I don't respond. He understands though. We sit like that until Devin gives us the signal that the food is ready.

"Alright!" I clap and walk towards the entrance, "It's lunchtime, kids." I tell them and a collective aww could be heard with a pinch of Santana mixed in. I shake my head as I help the little ones out. Emma comes out second to last and I point her towards Sugar. Emma hurries over to Sugar and I wave to tell her to help Emma make her plate.

"Well that was embarrassing." Santana slides down and puts her shoes back on.

"I thought it was kinda cute." I tell her honestly and I try to ignore the blush that creeps onto my face.

"So what's on the grill?" Santana pats down her shirt and starts to make her way to the grill like everyone else but I stop her and turn her around.

"Nope," I pull her towards the house, "You're not eating any of that."

"What?" Santana looks behind at the retreating image of the others, "Why not?"

"Don't worry." I laugh, "It's good for you." We walk into the house and I bring her into the kitchen, sitting her down at the counter. "I felt bad that you're kind of forced to come after the bad day that you had yesterday."

"It's fine, Brittany. I feel better now."

"Well, feeling better or not, you should not be jumping around while recovering from a concussion. You should be resting, Santana."

"I couldn't just not come. Emma would never forgive me."

"I knew you'd still come, being stubborn and all," I smirk and Santana shrugs because she knows I'm right. "That's why I made you this." I place the bowl in front of her and she eyes it carefully.

"Is this?"

"My special soup." I smile and place the small pot next to her. "There's more if you want. I hope I made enough."

"Brittany," Santana shakes her head, "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," I sit down next to her after I grab my plate from the oven. "Just don't bitch too loud while I eat this steak in front of you." I grin as dig into my plate and Santana groans as she watches me eat.

* * *

"I don't care what you say," Santana laughs, "I'm pretty sure my soup was better than your lame steak."

"Whatever," I shake my head, "I did_make_ that soup, I could just make it whenever I wanted."

"But it's your _special_ soup. It wouldn't be so _special_ if you made it all the time." She argues and I smile at her. She smirks like she's won and I shake my head at her. Do I really have to say it? She's really going to make me say it.

"It's not the soup that makes it special," I tell her and hold my stare until finally she breaks hers and looks away. Those dimples. Those ones that only show themselves when she's trying to hide her smile. I think I love those dimples the most.

"Shouldn't we be outside by now? I'm pretty sure everyone's done eating." She stands up and grabs our plates, putting them in the sink.

"I got it," I tell her and reach into the sink. Our hands momentarily touch and she freezes. It came as more of a shock for _me_. I actually figured she was fine with us by now. We agreed to be friends after all. So why did she react like that to a simple touch?

"Sorry," She mumbles and pulls her hands into her jeans pockets.

"Hey," Devin walks into the kitchen and pauses mid step, slowly putting his foot down, "Am I interrupting?"

"No," Santana turns around and walks out into the backyard.

Devin watches her go and turns to look at me as I begin to wash our dishes. He walks up to the counter and eyes the pot that once held soup. "I was wondering who you were making that for." He sits down and waits for me to turn around. When I do, he's already raising an eyebrow at me.

"What?"

"You're unbelievable." He tells me, "What's going on with you? Tell me the truth."

"You first." I fold my arms over my chest and he tilts his head in confusion, "Eric." I reiterate and he shakes his head.

"Britt, I don't want to talk about it."

"Well then neither do I."

* * *

It takes about thirty minutes and three awkward glances for Santana to talk to me again. It could also be because Emma pulled her over to where I was sitting.

"Gracias por hoy, mommy [Thank you for today]." Emma beams up at me and I glance at Santana who just nods. I smile and pick Emma up, placing her on my lap.

"Are you having fun, baby?" I fix her hair slightly and she nods. "Okay, go play." She throws her arms around my neck before sliding off my lap and running around.

"Lo siento [I'm sorry]." Santana pulls out the chair across from me and sits down. "For earlier I mean. I may have overreacted."

"No it's okay." I tell her. "We're okay right? Us being friends and all?"

"Yeah, we're okay." She says and I smile. "It's just... gonna take some time to get used to. Considering everything that happened."

"Was it too much?" I duck my head, "Me making you soup? Should I have not done that?"

"No it was really sweet." She smiles, "Thank you." We sit there in silence for a few minutes just watching our surroundings. I can tell she still has something on her mind so I wait it out until finally she turns to me again. "I know I've said this before but I really am sorry for everything that's happened between us."

"Santana really, I understand. You don't have to-"

"Yes, I do." She shakes her head, "I acted like a complete idiot. I mean, I gave you my trust and when things didn't go my way, I punished _you_ for it." She looks down at her lap, "I'm willing to start over." She glances up, "As friends, of course. I'll learn to trust you as a friend."

I nod my head and smile slightly. She's really going to try to work this out. "Can I ask you something?" I look at her cautiously and she nods. "What is Taylor to you? Why did you seem so mad at her?"

It's a touchy subject. I could tell from the slight flinch that occurred the moment I said Taylor's name. I shouldn't push after that but if anything, it made me even more curious. I watch as Santana brings her hands to her lap and she begins to fidget with her fingers. She's going to try.

"I meet her the same way you did. At my abuela's dance studio. I was about eight years old then. We found out that we were actually neighbors and we instantly became best friends. We pretty much grew up together after that. Best friends all the way until my senior year in high school."

"What happened?" I ask and Santana glances at Sugar. Sugar sees the strain and comes by quickly. Before she could ask what's happened, Santana just tells her to sit down. She needs her for support. I'm glad for that.

"Around our freshman year of high school, we began a different kind of relationship. It was a secret for the most part. Nobody knew and we made sure of that. It was great. We had each other and we didn't need anybody else.

"But the questioning looks and whispers behind our backs got to us. We began dating others to hide our relationship even more. It wasn't until I joined Glee Club that I realized who I really was. I accepted it. I accepted myself. That was my first step. I wasn't out but at least I knew. I broke up with my loser beard of a boyfriend and begged Taylor to do the same.

"She agreed and we were free to do whatever we wanted then. We had the power to come out or stay in the closet for as long as we wanted. We agreed that we were finally exclusive. Finally a real couple. No longer hiding our feelings from each other."

She pauses and I let her. I know how hard this is. I also know that she wouldn't be doing this if she weren't ready to trust me again. It's a step in the right direction. It's a step towards something that we failed to do the first time. _Communicate_.

"And then I got outed." She closes her eyes, "You remember Finn?" I nod and she takes a deep breath, "He sort of said some things out loud in the middle of a crowded hallway one day at school and word pretty much got around. As much as I hated him for it, I eventually forgave him for that. Even though I no longer had control, I was a little glad that I didn't have to hold that part of myself back anymore.

"My friends," She smiles and puts her arm around Sugar, "God I love my friends. They were there for me the whole time. They helped me. Taylor on the other hand, didn't take it so well. She started to avoid me. And not just during school. She'd ignore my calls, my texts, even when I was just next door to her, I could see her put her phone back down."

"Santana," I stop her. Maybe this conversation isn't the best idea right now. I can tell it's getting a little too much.

"You need to hear it." She shakes her head. "I owe you that much."

"I know. I know I do. But we can finish this later. You're okay. You don't owe anything right now. It's okay."

"She was cheating on me, Brittany." She looks me dead in the eyes, "The entire time we were together. It meant nothing to her. It was all a big joke. She broke my damn heart. I found out later that she even told her boyfriend about our arrangement. Apparently I had been the laughing stock of the entire school before I even knew it. The only reason I found out late was because no one talks to us glee kids. Nobody. We were outcasts."

"Santana," I grab her hands when I see the first tear fall and nod for Sugar to check on Emma, "Santana listen to me. You are not who you are because of everything that's happened to you. You are who you are by what you make of everything that's happened to you. And from what I see, you're amazing."

"Thanks," She laughs and I pass her a napkin. She takes it and excuses herself to the bathroom to check her makeup. I cracked the surface. I'm getting there. This is the beginning of something really good. I can feel it.

* * *

We arrive at Ice Palace shortly before the night settles in. I made sure to dress Emma in the most fluffy jacket I could find and mittens with matching cap to ensure her safety. Thankfully, Eric convinced me that the second jacket is over kill. I just don't want my baby to cry if she falls on the ice is all.

"Hey," I smile at Santana and Sugar as they walk up to the entrance. The Ice Palace get together is a bit more intimate. Emma's friends all went home and now it's just the guys and us. All Emma's requests of course.

And then I remember Taylor. I forgot about Taylor.

"Oh my god, Santana." My eyes widen, "I totally forgot about Taylor. I can call her to cancel if you want?"

"No," She shakes her head. "I'm okay. I've gotten over what happened a long time ago. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?" I ask her again and she nods.

"Hey!" Taylor calls from the parking lot and we all turn around.

"Aunty Taylor!" Emma calls back and I try to put on a smile. I don't quite know how I feel about her right now. Best friends or not, I just can't look at her the same anymore. I can't believe she would do something like that to Santana. I shake my head, there has to be more to the story. There has to be.

"Ready?" I take hold of Emma's hand and everyone zips up their jackets. "Let's go!" I pick Emma up and she squeals.

* * *

Sitting in the stands drinking a hot chocolate as I watch Santana help Emma skate is something that I never knew I ever wanted to do. They're in the front of the rink, Santana is standing in the back of Emma while they both hold on to one of those skating walker things. It's quite actually an adorable sight to see. They're going slower than the others around them, taking their time as Emma tries to find her footing.

I really don't see how Santana is doing this with her broken wrist. She really shouldn't even be on the ice.

"You should go over there." Sugar walks up the bleachers and sits down next to me. "Go, I'll take a picture for your future family scrapbook." She smirks.

"Stop it." I nudge her side and she giggles. "We're just friends, Mama."

"Yeah well you can't blame me for being Team Brittana." She shrugs.

"Really?" I turn to her and laugh, "Team Brittana?" I smile and she shrugs again.

* * *

I blow into my palms as my skates hit the ice. I do a couple of laps by myself to warm up before making my way to the front again. I spot Santana and Emma with their little walker and smile to myself as I skate towards them.

"Hey," I greet them happily and Emma's face brightens.

"Mommy, look! I'm skating!" She beams and I chuckle.

"Good job, baby." I coo and smile at Santana. I can't really tell if she's blushing or if it's just cold.

I skate alongside them and just listen to their conversation. It sounds like more Spanish lessons. It's soothing almost. Just gliding next to them as they talk in their own little world. It's then that I notice that Santana's been with Emma the entire time we've been here.

"Do you wanna switch off?" I whisper to her and she glances at me before shaking her head. "Are you sure?" I ask again and she nods.

"Excuse me, ma'am?" One of the workers skate over to us and we stop, "Sorry but this area is for beginners only."

"She _is_ a beginner." Santana snaps a little too quickly and I glare at her to behave, making her duck her head.

"Sorry," I apologize to the worker and nod towards Emma, "That's my daughter," she waves at him, "I'm really not allowed to stay by her while she learns? It's her first time here."

"I understand ma'am but only one person can accompany her. If not, this area becomes crowded very fast." He explains and I nod in understanding.

"I got her," Sugar appears out of nowhere and winks at me, "You two can take a break."

"But-" Santana tries to stop her but Sugar takes ahold of the walker and begins to skate away with Emma, leaving Santana and I just standing there.

"If you two could make your way to the other side," The man motions for us to move. I smile at him and begin to skate away when I notice that Santana is not following me. I turn around and see a wide eyed Santana standing very cautiously. I quickly skate back and grab hold of her hand.

"You can't skate can you?" I smile at her and she closes her eyes as she shakes her head. The worker next to us chuckles as he skates away, only to come back with another walker for her. I thank him and position it in front of Santana. She grabs it quickly and lets out a breath.

"Thanks," She smiles quickly at the worker as he pats us on the back before going to help someone else that fell.

"You got it?" I ask her and she nods as she begins to glide on the ice. I stay next to her until she falters slightly and I quickly grab the metal handles on both sides of her. It was instinct. A bad instinct. Or maybe a good one because now she's in front of me. I can feel the body heat coming from her back and I move slightly closer to her.

It's silent. Apart from the music playing over the speakers and the sounds of laughing families that surround us. We begin a slow rhythm as we skate in small circles around the cones. This is friendly right? Friends do these things? I mean, she was about to fall, and I'm pretty good at skating so the logical thing to do is to help her.

I catch a glimpse of Sugar when her and Emma skate past us and she winks again, making me roll my eyes. This is purely friendly. Nothing more. Suddenly the mood changes and the lights dim.

"Alright love birds, couples only!" A man voice comes down from the speakers and Santana freezes, making me almost trip on her skates. I let go of the walker as we slowly make it to the wall and she turns to face me.

"Britt-"

"Hey," Taylor skates up to us and Santana chokes on her words. I can't help but feel the anger rise up at that. The fact that Taylor has hurt Santana so badly that she literally chokes when she near her, bothers me.

"Taylor, listen-"

"I was just wondering if you'd want to skate with me," She smiles innocently up at me and glances at Santana.

"Me?" I ask and she giggles.

"Of course silly," She grabs hold of my hand and I see Santana roll her eyes. I can't tell if it's because she doesn't like Taylor talking in _general_, or Taylor talking to _me_.

"I'll leave you to it then." Santana scoffs and follows the wall until she reaches the door, jumping off the ice and walks toward our table.

"Sanny's just a little fussy right now." Taylor smirks as she pulls me to the bigger section of the rink. She links her arms in mine and we skate in silence.

"Santana told me what you did to her." I mumble and Taylor continues to skate as if it didn't even affect her. Like she knew it was inevitable.

"I figured as much," She tells me but I note the slight softness in her voice. "Look Brittany, we've all done things we're not proud of. Doing that to Santana was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do."

"So why do it?" I stop skating and Taylor ducks her head.

"Look it's complicated okay?" She huffs and skates toward the exit.

"You can tell me. You really hurt her you know."

"I know I did!" She flings her arms in the air and I follow her as she walks up the bleachers. I sit beside her and she frowns, "There's more to it than what Santana told you. There's more to my side."

"Are you trying to justify cheating?" I roll my eyes.

She grabs my hand and I look at her, "I never cheated on her. I promise you that. I had to do what I did. You have to understand."

"Well I don't, Taylor." I shake my head, "I need you to explain it. I don't think I can let this go so easily."

She nods softly and takes a deep breath. For the next thirty minutes, she tells me everything.

* * *

"You need to tell her." I duck my head at the thought. "Santana deserves to know."

"I can't tell her now." She shakes her head, "Plus it would mess with what you two have going on."

It's true. It definitely would. If what Taylor told me is true then I honestly don't know how Santana would take it. The old feelings could come back for Taylor and I'd probably lose her.

_Wait, what am I saying? Santana and I are friends._

"We don't have anything going on," I shake my head and look away. "We did before, but not anymore. It ended last year." I tell her.

"Well from the looks of it, she doesn't seem to think it's over." Taylor laughs as she motions subtly towards the brunette staring at us. "I've known Santana a long time," She turns to me, "I've never seen her stare at anyone like the way she's staring at me right now."

"I think she's just curious as to what we're talking about." I shake my head and take a sip of the hot chocolate that Devin brought over to us earlier.

"Can I ask you something?" Taylor eyes me seriously and I nod. "Do you still like her?" She deadpans and I choke on my drink, "I mean, tell me honestly if you still have feelings for her."

"Why is it so important?" I whisper and glance at Santana.

"Because if you're over it, I'm going to try and mend things with her. But," She pauses, "Tell me to back off and I will."

I keep my eyes on Santana as I think of my answer. I don't know what to say. I watch as Santana laughs along with Devin and Sugar. The way the smile on her face loses its balance the moment her eyes fall on us again. I hate that. I want her to always be happy. Taylor studies my face until finally I turn to her and nod.

"I love her." I whisper making Taylor's mouth spread into a wide smile.

* * *

Things happened fast after my confession. Taylor of course catapulted herself toward me capturing me into a death hug while screaming _I knew it_. When we returned to our table we both had the biggest of smiles on our faces. Which of course earned us questioning glances from our friends.

"Is it present time yet?" Emma swings her legs back and forth as she sits on the table and I nod.

"Which do you want to open first?"

"Aunty Tana's!" She shouts and Santana blushes as she hands the little girl her present.

Emma rips into it quickly and we all smile as we watch her. I try to contain my own excitement but I'm clearly failing because Devin has that damn eyebrow raised at me again. I ignore him and continue to watch my baby open her present.

The smile on my face doesn't even come close to the smile on Emma's when we finally see her present from Santana. It's a blanket. A comfortable one from the looks of it. And it's huge. The most important part of it though is the custom design on the face of it. Santana smiles as she moves closer to Emma.

"The dinosaur is me," Santana points to the cartoon, "And the giraffe is you. I know you like giraffes because Auntie Sugar told me."

The cartoon itself is well drawn. It kind of makes me wonder how much it cost. The dinosaur looks a drawing of the stuffed one that she owns and the giraffe looks like Emma's stuffed animal, the one that she sleeps with every night. Above the two drawings is the name "Valerie" coming from the Dinosaur's mouth.

"Aww it says Valerie!" Sugar coos as she points to it.

Emma frowns as she crosses her arms over her chest, "Hey! Only Aunty Tana can call me that!" She pouts and Santana grins. That damn nickname. Emma's always constantly bugging Santana about calling her 'Valerie' or 'Val' but I guess it's become an unspoken agreement between the two. I guess Emma really does like that name. It's something special. Something that the two of them have that one else does.

"Thank you," Emma smiles up at Santana. Santana just chuckles and moves to give Emma a tight hug.

"Okay who next?" I ask and Emma shouts out another name. It goes like that until finally a single last present is placed next to Emma. She smiles up at me and I move to sit down next to her.

"I saved the best for last." Emma smiles and everyone practically melts at that.

"Mines is the best?" I smile down at Emma and she nods. I kiss her on the top of her head as I hand her the little box and she begins to open it. I watch carefully as Emma pulls out the contents inside and everyone smiles grow wider.

"What is it?" Emma frowns making everyone laugh. I chuckle softly as I hold my hand out for Emma to pass it to me.

"It's a collar, baby." I hold it up and she looks at me expectantly. "We're gonna go to the humane society tomorrow to pick out a little kitten or puppy for you."

"Really?" Emma's eyes widen and I giggle. "REALLY!?" She asks again but this time even louder. We all laugh again as I nod and Emma launches herself at me.

* * *

Emma, Taylor and I are skating together on the ice when I see Santana sitting by herself on the bleachers. I excuse myself from the two and Taylor nods as she takes Emma back to the beginners area.

"Hey," I sit down next to Santana and she scoffs. I turn to her expectantly and she avoids eye contact. "Oh so you're mad at _me_ now?" I ask her.

"That depends," She looks at me, "Are you all buddy buddy with you friend over there now?" She snaps and my mouth opens in disbelief. Is she serious? She's seriously mad at me again.

"What the hell, Santana?" I turn to her.

"What?" She glares back at me.

Those goddamn walls. I really wish she would just leave them behind.

"Santana." I lower my voice.

"Just leave it, Britt." She looks away and I shake my head. I'm not going to let this go.

"No."

"Brittany, please." She stands up, "I really don't want to start a scene." She tells me as she begins to walk away from me.

"Then talk to me, Santana." I follow her. I won't let her run away from me again.

"I can't!" She turns around and her voice is rough, "I just can't, Brittany."

"Why not?" I grab her hand to stop her from turning around again but she pulls her hand free.

"Because!" She yells, "God! I'm not good at this kind of shit, Britt. I'm just not. I don't talk about things."

"NO." I grab her hand again and look her right in the eye, "You don't get to pull that bullshit card on me again. Not right now. You've had your chance to not talk. You had a whole year of not talking. I'm trying here, Santana. I've been trying. I thought you said you'd try too."

"Well I lied." She spits back and I let go of her hand. She sees the hurt that flashes on my face and she ducks her head, "I don't know what to tell you."

"The truth." I tell her, "Tell me you want this." She knows what I mean. _Tell me you want ME._ I plead and she glances up at me. She debating it. I know she is. There wouldn't be such a long pause if she weren't. But then she shakes her head. "Santana..."

"I'm sorry." She whispers as she turns around and walks away from me.

What the hell just happened? I shake my head as I try to figure it out but I'm just so confused. Why is she so mad? I get that she's not on good terms with Taylor and all but really? Taking it out on me does nothing.

"She jealous." Taylor walks up to me and I look at her. "That's why she's mad." She tells me like it's obvious. "That's what you're trying to figure out right? Why she got so mad at you?"

"Why would she be jealous?" I watch as Santana sits down at the bench next to Sugar and they both glance at Taylor and I.

"I think I know how to fix this for you guys." Taylor smiles up at me, "But you have to do as I say, okay?" I nod. "Promise?" I nod again. "Okay, don't freak out on me."

"Taylor, why would I freak out? Just tell m-" My words are cut off by her lips. _Taylor's_ lips. On _mine_.

_A single kiss._

_Can change everything._


	22. A Single Kiss Part II

**AN: And thus begins Santana's descent into madness...**

**Santana POV**

* * *

Chapter 22: A Single Kiss Part II

_A single kiss._

_Can change everything._

I felt the pain before I saw it happen. It was the weirdest thing. There I was just sitting next to Sugar trying to calm down when I saw Taylor's face change. I knew then. She was up to something. Something involving Brittany from the looks of it.

This whole day is just fucked up already. First of all I totally messed things up during lunch earlier and then I went ahead and spilled what feels like my entire goddamn soul to Brittany in an attempt to fix what little of a relationship we had. Don't get me wrong, I didn't tell her all of that just because I felt like it at the time or because it was supposed to be some sort of guilt trip for her. I really do want to start things over with her.

As friends, of course. She's made that clear.

But then things got awkward once we arrived at Ice Palace. The whole skating with Valerie thing. I honestly thought I could get away with just skating in the beginner's area the whole time and no one would notice. But then Brittany came by and totally threw me for a loop. Not only that, Sugar decided that was the perfect time to offer her services and steal Val, my crutch, away from me. Leaving me with the one and only Brittany Pierce.

The way she still skated next to me after the fact and the way we didn't even say anything to each other. It was like how it was before. Our comfortable silence took over.

I decided to test it. To see how far it could go. I purposely lost my footing and in no time, Brittany was behind me, helping me keep my balance and holding me up. It was quick, quicker than I anticipated which in turn made me _actually_ falter. She froze for a split second after, realizing what she had done until I continued to skate again, making her follow. She never let go of the walker.

I was lost in a trance.

That is until Taylor ruined everything.

* * *

"Did you just see that!?" Sugar gasps beside me and I turn away quickly to avoid the scene. I can't believe it. I don't _want_ to believe it. "Santana?" Sugar grabs hold of my shoulders, "Are you listening to me? Your girl is locking lips with Taylor!" She nearly screams as she flies off her seat. I quickly snap into reality and pull her back down, silencing her from causing a scene.

"Mami, calm down." I tell her and she scoffs.

"_Calm down_? I should be telling _you_ that! How are you even okay right now?"

I'm not denying it, the pain came fast and sharp, cutting through me like never before. Obviously in the past I've already thought of Brittany moving on with someone else, but the idea of that person being Taylor, of all people, never crossed my mind once.

I was not prepared for that.

"I need to leave." I mumble to Sugar as the first wave of realization hits me and I choke on my words. "Now, Mami, I need to leave right now!" I shout as I fumble with my skates, loosening the laces as fast as I can. Sugar runs as fast as she can to return our skates and returns to me with my shoes and belongings.

"They're not kissing anymore." Sugar whispers next to me as I'm struggling to put my left shoe on.

"God damn it why won't this go in?" I huff angrily.

"Santana?" Brittany's soft voice stops all movement as it rolls down my spine. "San?" She tries again and I clench my eyes shut.

"I just remembered," I say through shaky breath, "I have to attend this thing for a friend and I have to leave now."

"You're leaving?" Emma slowly walks up the steps of the bleachers until she reaches me and I slap myself internally.

"I'm so sorry, Val." I hold my arms out and she steps closer to me. I pick her up and place her on my lap, "I'll make it up to you okay?"

"Promise?" She asks and I smile sadly down at her.

"Pinky promise." I state as I hold my pinky up for her to wrap her tiny one around. "Nos vemos luego?" [See you later?]

She smiles at that, remembering our usual goodbye and giggles, "Hasta luego."

I put her down and duck my head away from Brittany. I can't even look at her right now. It's the strangest feeling though. I was mad earlier at the fact that her and Taylor were hitting it off so well, but right now, after seeing that kiss, it sparked something in me. It's not anger. It's a whole other emotion that I can't quite place.

That's what scares me the most. And that's why I need get out of here, fast.

* * *

The next couple of days are the worst. I've been avoiding everyone and locking myself in my room to think about everything that's happened. So far I've broken it down into four parts. I've even made notes so as not to leave anything out. I've deconstructed the entire interaction between Brittany and myself. It's all here, in this manila folder filled with everything from scribbles and doodles to paragraphs and diagrams.

XX

**The Pharmacy:** This is where it all started. It was pretty much the first serious interaction between the two of us since Lima. I was already having a bad day and then I ran into Brittany. Surprisingly, she made me feel a little better. I couldn't help but think that she was flirting with me. Maybe I'm reading too into things though. I mean, Brittany is naturally a very friendly person.

But then the air changed. Taylor showed herself and I felt stuck. The knowledge of Brittany knowing Taylor changed everything. They got along so well together. It was awkward as fuck to stand there and listen to them talk. Shocking doesn't even come close to describe my feelings then.

When Sugar came by and saw Taylor I knew it then. That must've been what she's been dying to talk to me about. It happened so fast when Brittany invited Taylor to Val's party. Or maybe it was because my own mind was racing at the time that I failed to keep up with their conversation.

**The Party: **I struggled to find balance in the beginning of the party. I wanted to be there for Val but my mind kept drifting to the blonde smiling and laughing on the other side of the yard. It wasn't until Devin handed me a cup that my mind actually started working. (How could I have not noticed the giant dinosaur themed moon bounce? It was huge)

I walked over to the moon bounce when I saw Val waving me over. When she begged me to come in I couldn't resist. Broken wrist or not, running over to the entrance, flinging off my shoes, and shimmying my way into the moon bounce was probably the most fun I had in a long time.

When it was over though, I realized that everyone was watching us and my cheeks flooded with color. Brittany helped me get out and we laughed for a bit about it. When I began to go towards the crowd surrounding the grill, she turned me around quickly. (I'm not gonna lie, I legitly thought she was going to kiss me then. I don't even know why, but that just happened to be the thought that flashed through my mind in that moment)

I was wrong. _Of course_. Instead she took me into the kitchen and served me soup. I still don't know what that means. It was a surprisingly intimate thing to do. At least for me it was. It was something that we both needed though. It broke the awkwardness of being just friends, and after it was done it actually felt like that's what it was for. To bring us out of our funk. To get us comfortable with each other again. It was a really sweet thing for her to do.

(But then she accidentally touched my hand and I completely regressed back to the stumbling idiot we all know I am)

**The Confrontation:** This is where it gets complicated for me. I don't know what happened or even why this happened. Everything was going so well throughout the day but the moment Taylor came back into the picture I turned into a mess. It was completely my fault. I realize that now. I told Brittany that I was fine when I knew I wasn't. But even then, I had no right to tell her to uninvite Taylor so I kept my mouth shut.

The buildup was slow and constant. I didn't even realize what was happening to me until it was too late. The irritation took over and I lashed out to the only person that I never wanted to lash out at again. Brittany didn't deserve that. I've replayed the entire arguement over in my head at least a million times now.

I was angry. Not at Brittany, not at Taylor, but at myself. I don't even know why, I think I'll just chalk that up to me being angry at that fact that seeing them together pisses me off. As in, I'm not angry because they look cute skating together with Val, but angry at myself that I'm angry that they look cute skating together with Val.

(Fuck, I don't even know if that makes any sense)

Either way, I was angry. And I in no way hid that emotion. Brittany caught on immediately and called me out on it. Which in turn made me even more angry. She didn't deserve that. She was so confused. I could tell by the way she was pleading with me. She knew what she was doing though. I knew what she was asking. I just didn't want to hear it. I didn't want it to be true.

(Maybe it's not though. Maybe I'm just imagining everything. Maybe I'm over analyzing things again)

I walked away from her. I walked away from her _again_. Of all the stupid decisions in my life, that one might take the cake. I just couldn't deal with it. I should have just told her. Things definitely would be different right now if I just said it.

_I'm jealous. That's why I'm mad, Brittany. I'm jealous. _

But that's not even the tip of it. The one thing that bothered me more than me being jealous was the fact that I told her everything. I told Brittany what happened between Taylor and I. So why was she talking and laughing with her like none of it mattered?

Something must have happened in the time between arriving at Ice Palace (with Brittany asking me if she should uninvite her childhood best friend) and then. Something changed. It made me wonder. It festered in my thoughts until Brittany gave me the opportunity to release it. I shouldn't have done it though. I knew I hurt her.

XX

That's what I have so far at least. All leading up to my last and finally piece of the puzzle. It's on another sheet of paper and is separated from the others because I'm still unsure of what it means.

Even though it's glaringly obvious.

* * *

I've decided to talk to finally talk to Brittany about what happened. I can speculate all I want about it but it all turns to shit if Brittany's intentions were otherwise. It could be all innocent for all I know. The plan is set. All I have to do now is actually _do it. _It's so simple yet I'm having a hard time moving from my spot.

"Santana?" Sugar peeks into the living room and I turn in my chair to look at her, "You okay? You've been sitting like that all morning."

I nod slowly and drop my head back down on the armrest. This shouldn't be so hard.

"Why are you up so early anyways?" She continues as she takes her seat on the other sofa, "I thought you don't have work today?"

"I don't," I mumble, "I just thought maybe I'll wake up for fun so that my best friend could maybe pester me about it."

"Wow," Sugar laughs as she leans sideways and pulls her feet up on the cushions, "Someone is extra sassy today."

I roll my head to the side to look apologetically at her and she smiles. We stay like that for a while until my alarm goes off. I quickly silence it and sit up. It's now or never. If I'm going to do this then I need to do it now.

"Do what?" Sugar sits up too and raises an eyebrow at me curiously.

"Do what?" I repeat earning the other eyebrow to go up too. "Oh, um, nothing," I stammer to my feet, "I gotta go."

* * *

I pull up to the familiar curb and wait. I may have sped a little to get here just in case Brittany were to show up early. I know for a fact that she'll be here today. We talked about her work schedule earlier and she told me that she usually catches the bus today. Today as in _Wednesday_. Wednesday as in the used to be _our day_.

I figured then that that is probably why it's so hard to do this now. What I'm about to do is _our thing_. Our Wednesday thing.

I eye the bus stop as I wait patiently until I finally see Brittany's blonde hair. I smile as I see her slightly dancing to her usual imaginary beat. I check the cup holder beside me for my iPod as I start my engine back up. I want this to go as normal as possible. I just have to lie and tell her that I'm only offering her a ride because I'm heading into town anyway.

Just as I'm about to pull my car away from the curb, I see another car pull up beside her. The driver steps out and moves around the car, giving Brittany a bright smile with accompanying hug. A hug that lasts longer than it should and I clench my steering wheel. I should've seen this coming. I should've known.

Still, seeing Taylor picking up Brittany the same way that I used to urges something in me. Something deep in my gut. I drive away quickly and go back home, trying to block out the images of Brittany and Taylor becoming... _a thing. A couple. _

I don't think I could handle that.

It takes exactly five hours, forty-seven minutes, and twenty-one questions from Sugar to finally get the courage to leave the house again. This time, I try to get the thoughts of Brittany and Taylor out of my head by going for a run. The park seems like a great idea right about now. All this pent up energy and unspoken feelings, I'll just sweat it out.

I walk/jog the few blocks to the park and begin to stretch. Plugging in my earphones to my iPod, I change it to the usual workout playlist and check my wrist watch. I figure since I'm a little more feisty today, my time should be better than usual.

"Aunty Taylor!"

My head snaps up at the familiar voice and my eyes widen. I'm not sure if I should be thankful or angry at the fact that the beginning of the first song was soft enough that I could still hear through my earphones. Then again, if I didn't notice the three people at the other side of the park, I would have probably accidentally ran in that direction without even knowing until it was too late.

"Emma!" Brittany laughs at the two, "Play nice!" She shouts just as Taylor picks up the little girl and swings her around playfully.

My jaw clenches immediately. What the fuck is happening? I turn around quickly and close my eyes, silently debating if I should just leave or approach them. I can still run, I'm far enough away that they wouldn't have seen me yet.

But on the other hand, what if I do go over there? It already hurts to witness, how am I gonna react by seeing them together up close? What if they already saw me? I could still run now and pretend that I didn't see them, right? Oh god, what if they're on a _date_?

Through all these questions, one thought pushes its way to the front, standing at attention.

_That could've been me._

* * *

"Santana Lopez, open this door right now." Sugar yells from the other side of my bedroom door. I blink my eyes into focus as I realize that I fell asleep at my desk. I peel the piece of paper from my face and stretch my back.

"Calm your tits, Mami." I mumble.

"You have a visitor." Sugar tells me in a softer voice and my mind goes straight to Brittany, making me freak out. "Don't even think about escaping through your window," Sugar states just as my eyes land on said window. "It's not Britt, don't worry."

I exhale at that. Good, it's not Brittany. I move to open my door but regret it the moment I see her face.

"Sanny," Taylor smirks at me and I wipe my face hastily. I swear I better not look like shit.

"What?" I roll my eyes at and open my door to let her in. I glare at Sugar to let her know that I won't be forgetting this any time soon before turning around completely.

"I need to talk to you." She smiles as she makes herself at home and sits on my bed, patting down the sheets and glancing at my decor.

"Really? I never would've guessed." I roll my eyes, "I figured you just came here to just sit on my bed and state the obvious."

"Would you mind tuning down the bitch attitude?" She snarls and I look at her, holding her stare for as long as I can before I look away. Damn it.

"What did you want to talk about?" I ask her as I fidget in my chair.

"Brittany," She looks at me cautiously and I know why. Brittany must have told her about what happened.

"We dated." I shrug, "So what?"

"I know she means more to you than that, Santana." She tells me knowingly and I duck my head. "Look, I'm not here to fight you. I just need to get a few things straight."

"Like what?"

"I know you, Santana. Let's not forget that okay. I know you still have a thing for Brittany. You wouldn't be acting like this if you didn't. So let's not beat around the bush anymore." She smirks, "All I'm saying is that if you want your girl back, you better hurry because she's got other options now."

She stands up and smooths out her blouse before turning to leave. I turn away and shake my head. She's playing with me again. She going to hurt Brittany. I fucking know it.

"Why are you doing it?" I speak with a small voice as I look at her and she stops, turning around to look at me.

"What?"

"Why are you doing it?" I ask again, this time more confidently, "What are your intentions. Let's not forget that I know you too, Taylor. I swear to God if you think this is some sick joke-"

"It's not." Her face softens. "It's not a joke."

"Last time I checked, our relationship _was_ a joke. I explicitly remember you telling me that you're not gay." I spit and Taylor looks away from me. A pang of guilt passes through me but just as fast as it was there it disappears. I brush it off as yet another manipulation technique.

"I'm sorry, Santana." She whispers and her eyes meet mine. "I don't think I've told you that yet. I know how much I've hurt you and-"

"I don't want your damn pity." I scoff.

She looks down and I study her. I don't think I can remember there ever being a time that she looked like this. So small. So _fragile_.

"I _did_ love you, you know." She keeps her eyes down, "I never wanted to hurt you like I did. I had no other choice."

"You're such a liar." I state and she shakes her head softly. "Of course you had a choice. You just chose wrong." I spit.

"I didn't." She tells me as if she honestly believed it. "Looking at you now, how far you've come, I know I made the right choice then."

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"Just look at how you've grown, Sanny." She tells me as if it's obvious, "High school national champion, top of your class grades, great friends," She smiles sadly as she glances at the cork board filled with pictures of the glee club members. "You're going to school; in Hawaii, no less. I know you're not here on that cheer scholarship. And I know you're not paying for it yourself."

"You're gonna need to get to the point." I snap my fingers to hurry her along.

"The point is your Grandmother." She breathes out and my mind becomes momentarily frozen. _My abuela? _"Without me in your life, you're better off." She closes her eyes and speaks as if she's reciting from something.

"What are you talking about?" I stand up and walk over to her slowly, "What does my abuela have to do with any of this?"

"She-" Taylor glances up at me and that's when I finally see her eyes. "Do you remember that day you came out to her? The day she disowned you?"

"How could I forget?" I chuckle sarcastically, "Worst day of my life."

"Yeah well I remember it a little differently than you do." She looks away and I lead her back to the bed. She sits down and I go back to my chair.

"You drove me home from her house." I tell her as I think back to that day, "I was a mess. You cried with me and everything. How much more different could your version of it be?"

"I never told you that I went back." She glances up at me again to gauge my reaction, "I was just so mad. My whole body was screaming at me to tell her off." She shrugs off my questioning look, "I loved you and she hurt you."

"You didn't love me." I mutter and she look at me seriously, "Sorry. Continue."

"_Anyways_, when I got there she told me that she'd been expecting me. Look, I love your grandmother. She was my dance instructor since I was a kid. But that day... I don't know, that day I was just so angry at her. I was so disappointed. I started scolding her and yelling and she sat there and took it all. By the end of it she was fuming. I knew I was overstepping but I had to do it. She looked me right in the eye and told me to stay away from you, Sanny. She practically ordered me."

I stay silent as I let it process slowly. I think I'm still stuck on the fact that Taylor actually did love me back. After all these years, I think I just convinced myself that all those times we had before everything blew up in my face were lies but really, they weren't. We had some of our best days before I was outed. Our best memories were before all of that. When we were still _pretending_.

"You didn't have to listen to her." I whisper, "We could've hidden it again. We could have gone back in the closet." I turn to her and she shakes her head.

"No. We couldn't have. It was too risky."

"What was too risky?" I raise my voice, "If not that then why break my fucking heart in the process! You could've just let it be. Break up with me, ignore me, whatever. But no, instead you did everything you could possible imagine to break _me_."

"I had to!" She stands up, "I needed to make sure you wouldn't try to mend it. I didn't want you to form the idea that everything I told you were lies. But they _were_, Santana. Everything, me cheating on you with Brandon, the whole school knowing, it was all lies. I just manipulated everyone to play along."

"Why the fuck would you do something like that? You ruined my goddamn life! Do you know that? I had nobody after you left me."

"You had everything!" She yells, "I made sure of that!"

"Stop! Just tell me why you did it. Just stop talking like it's some huge secret and explain! Explain to me how ruining my life, breaking my heart and leaving me emotionally scarred was all so that you could somehow _protect_ me. _Please_, Taylor. Explain."

"You don't think _my_ life was ruined too?" She shakes her head, "I had to leave the one person that made me feel like myself. You were everything to me, Santana. We had it all. We were _in love_. I fell in love with you completely by accident. I was so scared but we got through it together."

"_I_ got through it. _You_ decided to stay behind remember."

"Goddamn it, Santana! Would you just let me talk?" She yells and I have to take a step back to reground myself. "I was scared and young, and I didn't want your grandmother to hurt you anymore than she already had that day."

"What? What do you mean?" The back of my knees find my chair and I sit back down, prompting her to do the same.

"She held this against me." She explains and I look at her curiously, "_This_. Everything that you have right now. She was going to take you out of the college trust fund. She warned me that if my _unnatural behavior_ continues to _influence_ you, that she'll take it all away. You wouldn't have had a cent of it. She was planning on cutting you out entirely from the family. Even her will, Sanny. "

"That's it?" I scoff and she looks up at me. "_That's_ what she had on you? _That's_ why you did all of that? She doesn't even pay for my school! My parents gave me this money."

"It's not nothing, Santana. It was your _life_. As a teenager that scared the shit out of me. I didn't want that for you. The money you're living on right now, school, books, rent, that's all coming from that fund. All that money that your parents gave you? That's from your grandmother."

"No." I shake my head.

"Yes," She reaches over and grabs my hand, "I checked it out. I went to your parents and told them what happened. I told them everything, Sanny. We _tried_, we really tried to find a way around it. It was the only option. We had to do it to make sure you were taken care of. I _had_ to break everything off."

"My parents? My fucking parents knew about this? And they agreed?" I pull my hand away and my eyes become clouded. "Are you serious right now?" I try to blink it away but the tears come anyway.

"I'm so sorry." Taylor stands up, "I'm so so sorry, Sanny."

The door flings open and Sugar rushes in, "Leave," She tells Taylor, "Right now. You need to leave."

"Okay," Taylor glances back at me. "I'm serious about before, Sanny. About Brittany I mean."

"I said _leave_, Taylor." Sugar steps in between the two of us and eyes Taylor down. She nods softly and walks out of the room.

* * *

My fingers hover over the familiar name and I debate silently with myself on whether or not to do it. I still can't believe it. The fact that my parents kept this from me. Like it was some sort of pact that they made to ruin me. Purposely allowing Taylor to treat me the way she did.

Didn't _I _get a say in all of this? No one ever once asked me my opinion.

Then I think back to Brittany and how everything unraveled to where I am right now. I would have never meet Brittany. But then again I would have never _hurt_ her either. I probably would have gone back in what little of a closet I did have and quit glee club. And I definitely still wouldʻve been a bitch that's for sure.

"Hey," Sugar taps lightly on my bedroom door and I pick my head up off the bed to look at her.

"Hey," I mumble as I drop my head back down. Sugar moves to the bed and climbs in next to me.

"You wanna talk?" She looks at me and I shake my head. "You sure?" She asks again and I shake my head, making her giggle.

"I don't know what to think. Help me think." I frown and she turns on her side.

"I think that you think to much about it." She tells me and I turn my head to look at her. "It's happened. It not like thinking about it will change anything."

"I guess." I look back at the ceiling.

"I'm still curious though," She whispers, "What _are_ you thinking?"

I shrug slightly, "I don't know. I mean, at first I was really mad, or shocked. But I think now, I'm mostly just confused."

"Confused?" Sugar sits up and looks at me, "How? It was pretty clear. Like your parents and your girlfriend conspired to make you miserable behind your back and-"

"Mami, stop talking." I roll my eyes, "I'm not confused about that part. I get it, they were _looking out for me_ or whatever. I'm confused about Taylor."

"Why?"

"I don't know. There's just something that's been bugging me. Why now? Why tell me now all these things about my grandmother?"

"I thought she said it was because of Brittany." Sugar tries but I shake my head.

"But that's just it. If she were really interested in Brittany, she wouldn't have asked my permission. That's not like her. That's not Taylor."

"People change." Sugar offers as explaination but I don't buy it. Taylor's up to something. I just feel it.

I turn to her, "Skype sesh?"

"PLEASE." She doubles over and I laugh.

"Okay, okay go grab my computer."

"Thank god," Sugar sighs as she moves off the bed, "I've been dying to talk to Quinn and Rach about this."

"Like you haven't been doing that on the phone already." I tell her knowingly. She glances back at me and shrugs admittedly before setting up the computer in front of us.

I move to lie on my stomach to get comfortable and Sugar lies down next to me in the same. "You think they're still up?"

I shrug, "Maybe, Rachel might throw a fit but I don't really care."

We wait patiently for Quinn to answer the call until finally her screen appears with Quinn's squinty eyed sleepy face. It's lagging at first and we could barely make out a small pinkish figure run across the screen behind her.

"Hey Quinn!" Sugar chirps up first and Quinn smiles softly at us as she checks the time.

"It's like 1am here, guys. What's going on?" She yawns as she fixes her hair. Rachel finally comes into view wrapped in a robe and I raise my eyebrow at the sight, recognising the color.

"Hey, Rachel." I smirk and she smiles at me, unknowing of my most recent revelation. "Tired?" I ask and she nods as I watch Quinn turn a slight shade of pink.

"_Anyways_," Quinn interrupts, "Is everything okay? Are _you_ okay?"

"I'm fine." I tell her, "I kinda just need to vent..."

"She needs advice." Sugar corrects me.

"On which mess?" Rachel snorts and I glare at her, "The Taylor mess, the parent/grandmother mess, the _Brittany_ mess-"

"I think she's got it, Rachel." Quinn stops her, "And I'm pretty sure all of those things are connected to each other in some way."

"I just- I need to know if I should just give up." I duck my head and Sugar looks at me.

"What? Give up what?" She asks me and I look at her like she should know by now. "WHY? Why would you give up?"

"Because I don't know. She's got _options now_." I mock Taylors words.

"What options?" Quinn raises an eyebrow at that and I drop my head onto the bed.

"Taylor." I mumble.

"WHAT?" Rachel's eyes widen in surprise and I groan. "Sugar, you were supposed to prevent things like this from happening!"

"Don't blame me! It's not my fault." Sugar exclaims.

I turn my head to the side to look at Sugar, "You haven't told them yet?"

"No. I didn't want Rachel to yell at me like she is now." She huffs.

"Okay no." Rachel holds up her finger, "How the hell did this happen? In the last update you just told me that Taylor confessed about the whole grandmother thing. Also that her and Brittany knew each other and that Brittany invited her to Emma's party."

"Yeah, and then they fucking kissed." I groan.

"THEY _WHAT_?" Rachel and Quinn nearly stand up.

"_In front of Santana_." Sugar finishes and this time Rachel actually does stand up.

"Quinn, go fetch my luggage. I'm going down there to kick some ass."

"Rach, calm down. You're not going anywhere." Quinn grabs her hand to pull her back down on the seat.

I move off the bed and go into my desk to grab the pile of notes I have in there. When I pull it out, Sugar looks at me with a strange look but I ignore it. I go back onto the bed and sit up against the headrest as Sugar repositions my computer so that we are both sitting the same again.

"What's that?" Sugar whispers to me and I hold my little manila portfolio close to my chest as she tries to glance at it.

"It's a breakdown of everything that's happened." I explain. I see Rachel and Quinn stop arguing about whatever it is that they're arguing about and look back at me.

"You _made_ that?" Quinn tries to contain her laughter.

"Are you serious?" Rachel laughs too, "Oh my god, you're going insane..."

I ignore the idiots around me and proceed to opening the file. I flip through a few of the pages until I reach the one I want and point to it. I spend the next fifteen minutes explaining to them what happened from my point of view and how I interpreted the whole situation. When I'm finished I go back to my previous conclusion that Brittany has moved on.

"You don't know that she's actually moved on though." Quinn tries to reason, "They could have just been catching up on what's been going on with each other. You said that they were old friends, right?"

"Yeah..."

"See. They were just hanging out." Sugar tries too but I shake my head.

"Look, I would totally agree with you guys but you didn't see them that day. The day that I went to try and talk to Brittany but I got cockblocked by Taylor. They already _look_ like a fucking couple. They looked like a fucking _family_ when I saw them at the park with Val."

"Well what are you gonna do about it then? If Taylor steps in, what can you do to stop it?" Quinn questions.

"Nothing. I can't do anything because Britt's made it very clear to me that I've been friend zoned."

Rachel opens her mouth to say something but she stops herself. I know what she was going to say though. _Good. _It's not a secret that Rachel doesn't approve of Brittany. In fact, she probably voices it every chance she gets. Which is why it shocks me that she doesn't say anything this time.

"You can always get out of a friend zone. You just need to work hard enough at it." Quinn breaks my train of thought.

"It's different now. She's found another person. I've already screwed it up for myself."

"No, you didn't. You still have a chance." Sugar looks at me.

"I don't."

"You do," Quinn tells me, "You're just too scared."

"Fuck off, Fabray." I spit back, "I'm not _scared_. I'm just not gonna put myself out there again if I know I'll be shot down. Plus, Taylor will forever have those bragging rights. I can't believe I lost her to Taylor. Of all people, fucking TAYLOR. I should just move out of the damn state. Restart somewhere else. Maybe-"

"Jesus Christ, Santana!" Rachel blurts out. "Would you stop whining!"

"Excuse you?" I raise my eyebrow at her.

"Stop. Your. Whining." She tells me again and my mouth opens as does Quinn's and Sugar's.

"Oh hell no."

"Rach..." Quinn turns to her but Rachel doesn't even budge.

"No. Santana, listen to me. I don't like Brittany." She deadpans and I see Sugar on the screen next to me pull her lips into her mouth. This is gonna be messy and she knows it.

"Rachel, you don't have to make things worse..." Quinn tries but Rachel holds her ground.

"It's not like it's some big secret. I just don't like her. I don't like her with you, I don't like her in general. She broke your heart, she lied to you, she hid the most important thing in her life from you."

"It doesn't matter." I shake my head. "I don't care about all of that anymore, Rach. I got over it, I was a complete ass to her. I ran when I shouldn't have. But now it's different!"

"Is it?" She narrows her eyes at me.

"It is! It definitely is. And you can dislike her as much as you want because I'm glad you do. Because whether I like it or not, you're my best friend you little midget. I'm grateful that you're so protective of me but you have to understand, I love her."

Quinn's eyes widen and a hint of a smile shows itself on Sugar's lips. Rachel doesn't even seemed fazed. In fact, after about thirty seconds of silence of silence she smirks.

"You love her?" She questions me and I nod firmly."You really love her?" She asks again and I nod... again. She shakes her head at me and I almost open my mouth to say more but she stops me with a small grin. "Good." She look right at me and smirks, "Now we can get to work."

"What?" I tilt my headand glance at Sugar who seems just as confused. "What just happened?" I think aloud to myself.

"We have to come up with a game plan right?" Rachel explains.

"Game plan?" I ask, clearly still confused.

"To get your girl back." She speaks as if it's obvious and just as I'm about to turn to Sugar to ask if any of that made sense, I've been tackled off the bed and onto the ground with Sugar squealing above me.

* * *

We spend the next two hours devising the perfect plan. By the time Sugar falls asleep on my bed I say good night to Quinn and Rachel and they wish me good luck. I move off the bed again and go to my desk, bringing my manila folder filled with notes with me. I place it down and it lands right next to the single sheet of paper that I've been trying to avoid.

I look at the lonely piece of paper beside the manila folder and laugh to myself. The fourth and last part to my notes of what happened. I've finally figured it out and I'm finally ready to admit it. I grab it and my eyes roam the only sentence on the page. When I started to write it down earlier that's as far as I got. At the time, it seemed like it was the one sentence that wrapped up my emotions perfectly. It still is.

XX

**The Kiss:** I'M LOSING HER AND I NEED TO GET HER BACK.

XX

Opening the left drawer of my desk, I see the familiar beat up notebook and smile. Of all the others I've ever felt the need to write, this one_,_ this one song for Brittany, will be the easiest to pen.

_A single kiss._

_Can change everything._


End file.
